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Rosemaryx

Senior Member
May 3, 2017
3,706
4,072
113
62
#1
If only I could have someone to sit in front of me right now and give me Scripture...

You see I have a drink problem , but since I gave my life to Christ my urge to drink is fading , these last days have been a testing time for me , just out of surgery ( it is in the prayer forum ) I have given into temptation to drink , I asked the LORD not to give me more than I can bare , after buying 2 small mini bottles of wine , I have gone and bought another 3 small mini bottles of wine , still that leads to a whole bottle of wine that I have kidded myself I have not drank , Oh what a deceitful heart I have :(...I looked at the big bottle and thought NO WAY am I drinking one of them , I have changed , now my lie has caught up with me , and here I sit with another 3 mini bottles after having two mini bottles , that makes a whole bottle , I am deceiving myself , what hurts me more then anything , I am defying God , if the truth be told I have just cried out to God , I know Jesus died for our sins , right now I feel wretched , and yet I sit with two mini bottles of wine in front of me knowing that no matter what I am going to drink them , that is sick :(

To be honest I do not understand why I am drinking...I trust in the LORD with all my heart and lean not on my own understanding , sometimes living in this flesh is horrendous , I just want to walk in the Spirit but today I am failing...What if God called me home right now and I appeared with alcohol , I do not want that , in my mind right now I am a shamed , and yet I am still willing to drink these two mini bottles unless the LORD makes me vomit not to drink some more...

This is who I am today , I am a sinner , a drunkard though I am not drunk , I am intoxicated , is that the same thing :confused:...

As I write this to be honest , I ask myself " Do I know what Jesus has done for me "...I will stop now because I know a intoxicated person can ramble , and that is not good...I just needed somewhere to express myself , thank you for listening , I feel such a failure...xox...
 

BillG

Senior Member
Feb 15, 2017
8,877
4,331
113
#2
If only I could have someone to sit in front of me right now and give me Scripture...

You see I have a drink problem , but since I gave my life to Christ my urge to drink is fading , these last days have been a testing time for me , just out of surgery ( it is in the prayer forum ) I have given into temptation to drink , I asked the LORD not to give me more than I can bare , after buying 2 small mini bottles of wine , I have gone and bought another 3 small mini bottles of wine , still that leads to a whole bottle of wine that I have kidded myself I have not drank , Oh what a deceitful heart I have :(...I looked at the big bottle and thought NO WAY am I drinking one of them , I have changed , now my lie has caught up with me , and here I sit with another 3 mini bottles after having two mini bottles , that makes a whole bottle , I am deceiving myself , what hurts me more then anything , I am defying God , if the truth be told I have just cried out to God , I know Jesus died for our sins , right now I feel wretched , and yet I sit with two mini bottles of wine in front of me knowing that no matter what I am going to drink them , that is sick :(

To be honest I do not understand why I am drinking...I trust in the LORD with all my heart and lean not on my own understanding , sometimes living in this flesh is horrendous , I just want to walk in the Spirit but today I am failing...What if God called me home right now and I appeared with alcohol , I do not want that , in my mind right now I am a shamed , and yet I am still willing to drink these two mini bottles unless the LORD makes me vomit not to drink some more...

This is who I am today , I am a sinner , a drunkard though I am not drunk , I am intoxicated , is that the same thing :confused:...

As I write this to be honest , I ask myself " Do I know what Jesus has done for me "...I will stop now because I know a intoxicated person can ramble , and that is not good...I just needed somewhere to express myself , thank you for listening , I feel such a failure...xox...
Precious sister Rosemary.

I'm going to ask you a question.

Are you a different person than the one you were before you came to Jesus?

At this moment you would probably say no.

But I would say yes.

The thing is, before you came to Jesus you struggled with alcohol and after you've come to Jesus you still struggle with alcohol.
The difference is that you know this is not God wants for you.

You say you are defying God but then say "I have just cried out to God"

That's not defying God. If you were defying God you would not give two hoots and call out for help.
If God called you home right now you would not have alcohol in your hand.
You know what Jesus has done for you, that's why you accepted him.
That's why you acknowledge you want help and call out to God.
God wants us to be honest with him. I we are not then he can't help us.

That's the sign of a changed person.

Does God call you a failure?
Or does he call you his child?
If God does not call you a failure who does?

You are his child who is acting out of character as his child.
He forgives your sorrow and your shame.

Pray to God, ask him why you struggle with this.
Normally there is a cause of the effect.

For me when I asked God "why do I have a gambling problem he said to me"

"I'm glad you asked, you've spent all your time trying to stop in the hope I will love you, now let's work on this together"

It was over a period of time that God revealed a lot to me, the causes of the gambling.
A lot of healing was needed but also a lot of forgiveness and forgiving.

God bless you sister.

Your brother in Jesus.

Bill.
 

Rosemaryx

Senior Member
May 3, 2017
3,706
4,072
113
62
#3
Thank you Bill my brother...The evil one stands before God slandering me , yet I am still a sinner...Yes I am a child of God , the slander calls me all sorts...I do not know why I drank tonight , what fix am I looking for , why am I not satisfied in my Lord , what has become of me that Jesus does not satisfy all my needs , why do I do what I do ...I know what Paul said , chief sinner , why can I not just give up this drink...

Bill , truth be known , I want to cut myself away from the world , away from internet , away from everything , but if I did , I could never be a light on the hill , I am struggling , I am crying out because I do not know what I am supposed to do...Our world we live in is different to everyone , I have 6 children , 13 grandchildren and one new born great grandchild , who am I amongst them all , it is overwhelming , what our are works , is it in behaviour , how can I be the light on the hill , my failure today is behind closed doors , but in front of God , I have failed today Bill , I hate addictions , and today my addiction raised it ugly head...xox...
 

Tinkerbell725

Senior Member
Jul 19, 2014
4,216
1,179
113
Philippines Age 40
#4
Romans 7:15-20 New Living Translation (NLT)

15 I don’t really understand myself, for I want to do what is right, but I don’t do it. Instead, I do what I hate. 16 But if I know that what I am doing is wrong, this shows that I agree that the law is good. 17 So I am not the one doing wrong; it is sin living in me that does it.



2 Corinthians 12:9 New Living Translation (NLT)



9 Each time he said, “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me.

Your guilt contributes to the problem. It becomes a cycle because it is the guilt that causes the it. God already forgave you so you need to deal with it and learn to forgive yourself. God's grace is sufficient for you and He is working on you now. Your healing does not happen over night but in His time. God bless.
 
N

NoNameMcgee

Guest
#5
you just got out of surgery Rose

my sweet sister

you were weak
and tempation took hold of you
you gave in

every single man and woman who isnt God in the flesh couldnt deny this has happened to us... many times


and now the enemy is attacking you stealing your joy when honestly you are already a child of God
a born again believer

im not gonna say dump out the wine
or go ahead and drink it


you know you have had an addiction before
and you dont want to decieve yourself and fall back into a life of dependence on wine

dont beat yourself up over what has happened
dont let your assurance
or peace
or joy be taken away

dont fall back into NEEDING it

you know all you need is Jesus


im going to pray for you
and please just pray for Him to show you what He wants you to see


(its not wine itself that is the sin anyways rose)

Ecclesiasticus
Chapter 31
25 Shew not thy valiantness in wine; for wine hath destroyed many.
(people boasting high tolerance drinking in ABUNDANCE)

26 The furnace proveth the edge by dipping: so doth wine the hearts of the proud by drunkeness.
(DRUNKENESS is what leads to error)
27 Wine is as good as life to a man, if it be drunk moderately: what life is then to a man that is without wine? for it was made to make men glad.
(moderately lets say maybe in major pain and not unto drunkeness... not a daily or weekly thing so long as your not losing vigilance or hurting others)
28 Wine measurably drunk and in season bringeth gladness of the heart, and cheerfulness of the mind:
(ask God... talk to Him about this... you know your limits and intents.... dont fall back into drinking in abundance or let it be a part of your life... but if you drank some in moderation during healing..... just talk to God about it
ask Him for direction)

29 But wine drunken with excess maketh bitterness of the mind, with brawling and quarrelling.
(this doesnt sound like you rose.... youre broken over what youve done)
30 Drunkenness increaseth the rage of a fool till he offend: it diminisheth strength, and maketh wounds.
(doesnt sound like you..... this is pointing to the brawlings of a drunk)
31 Rebuke not thy neighbour at the wine, and despise him not in his mirth: give him no despiteful words, and press not upon him with urging him to drink.
(i see you no different if you drank and i wont encourage you to drink more... but i hope you see the clear difference between who you were and who you are.... or the difference between a drunk and who you are)




sorry if it sounds like im rambling

:(

i guess what im trying to say is God loves you rose

im going to pray for quick healing
for God to bring you peace

deliver you from temptation
and comfort you


you are His daughter already
 
D

Depleted

Guest
#6
You drank because that is what you know the best. Because that is what helped you not face the world before the Lord called you. Because that is where you are most comfortable. It is your comfort zone. It is easier to go back to what we did before than to keep struggling and feeling off kilter every step of the way in living this new way. And, truthfully, it is easier to do what we used to do knowing it never really did work for us the way we had hoped, than to continue to trust the new without yet trusting the new enough to know if this is any better than that last disappointing thing we used to do.

There is real discombobulation in coming to the Lord. He's nothing like how we used to live. It feels like wearing high heels two sizes to big. It feels like leaving the house without the pocketbook and glasses. It feels like "I used to know the right way to live, but then I lost it, and now I have to use skills I should already have, but don't." It feels like relearning how to walk, talk, act, and even which clothes to wear. Everything we thought we knew how to do, suddenly we find out we never knew how to do it in the first place.

I really do remember being there.

But one thing that kept helping me along the way until this walk felt more normal than the last walk. God is my walker!

(And considering I cannot remember the word for walker in the UK -- just know it's not the word Americans use -- I'm going to show you who God is for you now.)



You're not nuts. Until you were born again you had a way to walk. And now being born again, you know that way didn't let you walk right/normally. You really do need to relearn how to walk. It is frustrating. But keep doing it until it is no longer frustrating. Otherwise, you spend the rest of your life hobbling along when you could have been walking upright with the Lord's support.

Feel free to feel discombobulated until you aren't, and assume discombobulated is going to take some time before it doesn't feel so discombobulating. The only way we ever get to the point of trusting the Lord as our muscle memory is to keep trusting the Lord until it becomes muscle memory. And by then, it stops being discombobulated.
 

Rosemaryx

Senior Member
May 3, 2017
3,706
4,072
113
62
#7
you just got out of surgery Rose

my sweet sister

you were weak
and tempation took hold of you
you gave in

every single man and woman who isnt God in the flesh couldnt deny this has happened to us... many times


and now the enemy is attacking you stealing your joy when honestly you are already a child of God
a born again believer

im not gonna say dump out the wine
or go ahead and drink it


you know you have had an addiction before
and you dont want to decieve yourself and fall back into a life of dependence on wine

dont beat yourself up over what has happened
dont let your assurance
or peace
or joy be taken away

dont fall back into NEEDING it

you know all you need is Jesus


im going to pray for you
and please just pray for Him to show you what He wants you to see


(its not wine itself that is the sin anyways rose)

Ecclesiasticus
Chapter 31
25 Shew not thy valiantness in wine; for wine hath destroyed many.
(people boasting high tolerance drinking in ABUNDANCE)

26 The furnace proveth the edge by dipping: so doth wine the hearts of the proud by drunkeness.
(DRUNKENESS is what leads to error)
27 Wine is as good as life to a man, if it be drunk moderately: what life is then to a man that is without wine? for it was made to make men glad.
(moderately lets say maybe in major pain and not unto drunkeness... not a daily or weekly thing so long as your not losing vigilance or hurting others)
28 Wine measurably drunk and in season bringeth gladness of the heart, and cheerfulness of the mind:
(ask God... talk to Him about this... you know your limits and intents.... dont fall back into drinking in abundance or let it be a part of your life... but if you drank some in moderation during healing..... just talk to God about it
ask Him for direction)

29 But wine drunken with excess maketh bitterness of the mind, with brawling and quarrelling.
(this doesnt sound like you rose.... youre broken over what youve done)
30 Drunkenness increaseth the rage of a fool till he offend: it diminisheth strength, and maketh wounds.
(doesnt sound like you..... this is pointing to the brawlings of a drunk)
31 Rebuke not thy neighbour at the wine, and despise him not in his mirth: give him no despiteful words, and press not upon him with urging him to drink.
(i see you no different if you drank and i wont encourage you to drink more... but i hope you see the clear difference between who you were and who you are.... or the difference between a drunk and who you are)




sorry if it sounds like im rambling

:(

i guess what im trying to say is God loves you rose

im going to pray for quick healing
for God to bring you peace

deliver you from temptation
and comfort you


you are His daughter already
Thank you Jamie...You yong brother of mine , you have answered all my mind questions , you have spoke from the word of God , thank you Jesus...xox...I will now go back and re-read what you just wrote , the word of God touches us like a double edged sword...xox...
 

Rosemaryx

Senior Member
May 3, 2017
3,706
4,072
113
62
#8
Thank you NNM...Our young brother in Christ , Just as Paul addressed Timothy , Jamie ( NNM ) reminds me of young Timothy...xox...
 

Waggles

Senior Member
Sep 21, 2017
3,338
1,261
113
South
adelaiderevival.com
#9
In Pentecost adults get converted by the infilling of the Holy Spirit.
We have numerous members of our Fellowship that can testify to being set free
from drinking, smoking, drugs, gambling, lusts, and many other wrongdoings when
they were baptised in the Holy Spirit.

The truth shall set you free.

Now the problem in much of Christianity is the teaching that all believers
immediately receive the Holy Spirit when they are "saved." When they
believe and call on the name of the Lord and so on.

But that is not the gospel preached by Jesus and the Apostles.
That is not the first church of Acts and the epistles.

17 And these signs shall follow them that believe;
In my name shall they cast out devils;

they shall speak with new tongues;
18 They shall take up serpents; and if they drink any deadly thing, it shall not hurt them;
they shall lay hands on the sick, and they shall recover.
Mark 16:

In my name shall they cast out devils > when the Holy Spirit genuinely comes into
you He will break the power of sin in your body and heart. God will cast out your
addictions and infirmities and whatever else binds you to the power of Satan.

Rosemary you need to be obedient to the gospel and believe the scriptures
Sorry to be blunt. But we have no shortage of testimonies in Pentecost as to how
people were set free when the were born again and spoke forth in tongues.
Instantly on the very day set free from alcohol and/or cigarettes, etc.

37 ... Men and brethren, what shall we do?
38 Then Peter said unto them, Repent, and be baptized every one of you in the
name of Jesus Christ for the remission of sins, and ye shall receive the gift of
the Holy Ghost.
39 For the promise is unto you, and to your children, and to all that are afar off,
even as many as the Lord our God shall call.
Acts 2:

There is are assemblies (congregations) of our Revival Fellowship in the U.K.
Feel free to check out the testimonies

The Revival Fellowship | There's a place in God's Kingdom for you.
 

BillG

Senior Member
Feb 15, 2017
8,877
4,331
113
#10
Thank you Bill my brother...The evil one stands before God slandering me , yet I am still a sinner...Yes I am a child of God , the slander calls me all sorts...I do not know why I drank tonight , what fix am I looking for , why am I not satisfied in my Lord , what has become of me that Jesus does not satisfy all my needs , why do I do what I do ...I know what Paul said , chief sinner , why can I not just give up this drink...

Bill , truth be known , I want to cut myself away from the world , away from internet , away from everything , but if I did , I could never be a light on the hill , I am struggling , I am crying out because I do not know what I am supposed to do...Our world we live in is different to everyone , I have 6 children , 13 grandchildren and one new born great grandchild , who am I amongst them all , it is overwhelming , what our are works , is it in behaviour , how can I be the light on the hill , my failure today is behind closed doors , but in front of God , I have failed today Bill , I hate addictions , and today my addiction raised it ugly head...xox...
Yes you have failed today.

And the point is you know you have failed.
So in a sense (I may be slapped down by some for this) but be thankful that you know you have failed.

The devil will tell you that you have failed and accuse you and then plant lies in your mind.

however the Holy Spirit will not accuse you and will not lie to you.

He will tell/reveal to you that today you got it wrong. Now let's talk about it.
You have confessed before God you got it wrong, and confessed it here before your brothers and Sisters in Jesus.
Will God reject you? Will we reject you?

A big fat NO.

If I'm honest I think your focus is wrong.
You/Me/We can focus on works and behaviour and being that light on the hill, in order to be accepted by God.

The reason I say this is because if we do that then we take the focus off Jesus.
We are already accepted by God through faith in Jesus.
If he loved you with an alcohol problem why would he stop loving you after you came to him.

You said "What if God called me home now and I appeared with alcohol?

What do you think?

Now if we take the focus of us keep it on Jesus the old man will decrease and the new man will increase.
The works of the flesh will decrease and our witness will increase.
The light will start to get brighter and brighter.
 
D

Depleted

Guest
#11
In Pentecost adults get converted by the infilling of the Holy Spirit.
We have numerous members of our Fellowship that can testify to being set free
from drinking, smoking, drugs, gambling, lusts, and many other wrongdoings when
they were baptised in the Holy Spirit.

The truth shall set you free.

Now the problem in much of Christianity is the teaching that all believers
immediately receive the Holy Spirit when they are "saved." When they
believe and call on the name of the Lord and so on.

But that is not the gospel preached by Jesus and the Apostles.
That is not the first church of Acts and the epistles.

17 And these signs shall follow them that believe;
In my name shall they cast out devils;

they shall speak with new tongues;
18 They shall take up serpents; and if they drink any deadly thing, it shall not hurt them;
they shall lay hands on the sick, and they shall recover.
Mark 16:

In my name shall they cast out devils > when the Holy Spirit genuinely comes into
you He will break the power of sin in your body and heart. God will cast out your
addictions and infirmities and whatever else binds you to the power of Satan.

Rosemary you need to be obedient to the gospel and believe the scriptures
Sorry to be blunt. But we have no shortage of testimonies in Pentecost as to how
people were set free when the were born again and spoke forth in tongues.
Instantly on the very day set free from alcohol and/or cigarettes, etc.

37 ... Men and brethren, what shall we do?
38 Then Peter said unto them, Repent, and be baptized every one of you in the
name of Jesus Christ for the remission of sins, and ye shall receive the gift of
the Holy Ghost.
39 For the promise is unto you, and to your children, and to all that are afar off,
even as many as the Lord our God shall call.
Acts 2:

There is are assemblies (congregations) of our Revival Fellowship in the U.K.
Feel free to check out the testimonies

The Revival Fellowship | There's a place in God's Kingdom for you.
NO! No, no, no, no, no!!!

I will NOT let you teach her this garbage because of how untrue it is and the harm it did to me. God is fully God so when he saves us, he saves us -- complete with "indwelling of the Holy Spirit." That is not a second chapter.

Because of the crap you're trying to teach as gospel, I was saved at 16, but didn't think I was because I didn't "Manifest the gifts." (aka speak in tongues.) So for the next EIGHT years, I thought I wasn't saved. AND, since God wouldn't save me, I tried drugs to save me.

This garbage-teaching led to my drug addiction.

No. Not ever! Not ever ever am I going to let this garbage be preached to another young Christian again!

(And, Rosemary. You're "young" in two ways. Young in rebirthday and under 60 young. lol Just never buy this crap. It cost too much.)
 
D

Depleted

Guest
#12
Yes you have failed today.

And the point is you know you have failed.
So in a sense (I may be slapped down by some for this) but be thankful that you know you have failed.

The devil will tell you that you have failed and accuse you and then plant lies in your mind.

however the Holy Spirit will not accuse you and will not lie to you.

He will tell/reveal to you that today you got it wrong. Now let's talk about it.
You have confessed before God you got it wrong, and confessed it here before your brothers and Sisters in Jesus.
Will God reject you? Will we reject you?

A big fat NO.

If I'm honest I think your focus is wrong.
You/Me/We can focus on works and behaviour and being that light on the hill, in order to be accepted by God.

The reason I say this is because if we do that then we take the focus off Jesus.
We are already accepted by God through faith in Jesus.
If he loved you with an alcohol problem why would he stop loving you after you came to him.

You said "What if God called me home now and I appeared with alcohol?

What do you think?

Now if we take the focus of us keep it on Jesus the old man will decrease and the new man will increase.
The works of the flesh will decrease and our witness will increase.
The light will start to get brighter and brighter.
^ ^ ^ ^
Bolstering up Bill for saying this.


(Not slapping down.)
 
Dec 28, 2016
9,171
2,718
113
#13
If we say that we have no sin the truth is not in us; 1 John 1:8.

Man, we all stumble, James 3:2. Many will not admit this, but it is true. This is, of course, not an excuse to sin, or for sin, but shows we will sin and we will feel horrible for failing.

Rosemary, get a support group. Many churches today have recovery programs. While we are in these bodies we will have struggles.
 

Rosemaryx

Senior Member
May 3, 2017
3,706
4,072
113
62
#14
NO! No, no, no, no, no!!!

I will NOT let you teach her this garbage because of how untrue it is and the harm it did to me. God is fully God so when he saves us, he saves us -- complete with "indwelling of the Holy Spirit." That is not a second chapter.

Because of the crap you're trying to teach as gospel, I was saved at 16, but didn't think I was because I didn't "Manifest the gifts." (aka speak in tongues.) So for the next EIGHT years, I thought I wasn't saved. AND, since God wouldn't save me, I tried drugs to save me.

This garbage-teaching led to my drug addiction.

No. Not ever! Not ever ever am I going to let this garbage be preached to another young Christian again!

(And, Rosemary. You're "young" in two ways. Young in rebirthday and under 60 young. lol Just never buy this crap. It cost too much.)
Lynn...I scrolled past wiggles post , not because i disrespect him , but I was just lead to scroll so I never read what he said...xox...
 

Rosemaryx

Senior Member
May 3, 2017
3,706
4,072
113
62
#15
Yes you have failed today.

And the point is you know you have failed.
So in a sense (I may be slapped down by some for this) but be thankful that you know you have failed.

The devil will tell you that you have failed and accuse you and then plant lies in your mind.

however the Holy Spirit will not accuse you and will not lie to you.

He will tell/reveal to you that today you got it wrong. Now let's talk about it.
You have confessed before God you got it wrong, and confessed it here before your brothers and Sisters in Jesus.
Will God reject you? Will we reject you?

A big fat NO.

If I'm honest I think your focus is wrong.
You/Me/We can focus on works and behaviour and being that light on the hill, in order to be accepted by God.

The reason I say this is because if we do that then we take the focus off Jesus.
We are already accepted by God through faith in Jesus.
If he loved you with an alcohol problem why would he stop loving you after you came to him.

You said "What if God called me home now and I appeared with alcohol?

What do you think?

Now if we take the focus of us keep it on Jesus the old man will decrease and the new man will increase.
The works of the flesh will decrease and our witness will increase.
The light will start to get brighter and brighter.
Thank you Bill , I love you my brother...God loves a gentle spirit , He truly does , for it is written 1 Peter 3:4 Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight...

Your gentleness speaks truth , I can hear you...xox...
 
Feb 28, 2016
11,311
2,972
113
#16
Rose,
when Jesus allows/helps us to 'give-up-over-come' something we are doing for the wrong reasons,'
and we 'obey Him', sometimes He gives us permission for our obedience to partake
for the right reasons in order to survive, but it always must be according to His Command'...
 

hornetguy

Senior Member
Jan 18, 2016
6,623
1,381
113
#17
it was a slip, sister.... that's all it was.

Start over... today. One slip doesn't define you. Start again. You can do this... one day at a time. Every day... a HUNDRED times a day, if necessary, talk to Jesus... he will, through the Spirit, give you the strength to say "no"......

Praying for you.....
 

Rosemaryx

Senior Member
May 3, 2017
3,706
4,072
113
62
#18
it was a slip, sister.... that's all it was.

Start over... today. One slip doesn't define you. Start again. You can do this... one day at a time. Every day... a HUNDRED times a day, if necessary, talk to Jesus... he will, through the Spirit, give you the strength to say "no"......

Praying for you.....
Thank you...I have just woke up after a couple of hours sleep , feeling a bit shaky but more guilty , letting our Lord down...I just thank God I stopped when I did , I used to drink till I was sick , I had about 5 glasses of wine , did not go out the door , did not play any old music , my whole behavior was changed this time round , I can only thank God for that...

Today is a new day , fresh start as you said , thank you for your prayers...xox...
 

Rosemaryx

Senior Member
May 3, 2017
3,706
4,072
113
62
#19
If we say that we have no sin the truth is not in us; 1 John 1:8.

Man, we all stumble, James 3:2. Many will not admit this, but it is true. This is, of course, not an excuse to sin, or for sin, but shows we will sin and we will feel horrible for failing.

Rosemary, get a support group. Many churches today have recovery programs. While we are in these bodies we will have struggles.
Hi P4T...Thank you for your reply...I will look into my new church and see if they can help...Now the guilt is creeping in , I feel slightly shaky , but nothing compared to letting our Lord down :(...

God has and is doing so much work in me , I can tell by how my behavior was , it was completely different to how I used to be when I drank , and also this time I stopped before I actually got drunk...

Now I just have to get through this day and rest in the Lord , thank you again for your reply...xox...
 

Rosemaryx

Senior Member
May 3, 2017
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#20
You drank because that is what you know the best. Because that is what helped you not face the world before the Lord called you. Because that is where you are most comfortable. It is your comfort zone. It is easier to go back to what we did before than to keep struggling and feeling off kilter every step of the way in living this new way. And, truthfully, it is easier to do what we used to do knowing it never really did work for us the way we had hoped, than to continue to trust the new without yet trusting the new enough to know if this is any better than that last disappointing thing we used to do.

There is real discombobulation in coming to the Lord. He's nothing like how we used to live. It feels like wearing high heels two sizes to big. It feels like leaving the house without the pocketbook and glasses. It feels like "I used to know the right way to live, but then I lost it, and now I have to use skills I should already have, but don't." It feels like relearning how to walk, talk, act, and even which clothes to wear. Everything we thought we knew how to do, suddenly we find out we never knew how to do it in the first place.

I really do remember being there.

But one thing that kept helping me along the way until this walk felt more normal than the last walk. God is my walker!

(And considering I cannot remember the word for walker in the UK -- just know it's not the word Americans use -- I'm going to show you who God is for you now.)



You're not nuts. Until you were born again you had a way to walk. And now being born again, you know that way didn't let you walk right/normally. You really do need to relearn how to walk. It is frustrating. But keep doing it until it is no longer frustrating. Otherwise, you spend the rest of your life hobbling along when you could have been walking upright with the Lord's support.

Feel free to feel discombobulated until you aren't, and assume discombobulated is going to take some time before it doesn't feel so discombobulating. The only way we ever get to the point of trusting the Lord as our muscle memory is to keep trusting the Lord until it becomes muscle memory. And by then, it stops being discombobulated.
I hear you Lynn...I see how the Lord has changed me in my behavior when I drank last night...Although I feel quilty and awful for letting our Lord down , I have some small comfort by the changes in my behavior...I did not drink to get drunk , nor was I sick , or showed any signs of my old patterns when I was drinking , that truly is the work of the Holy Spirit...

I hope to sleep some more now and come morning I hope to feel better still , then I will read the word...Thank you for your reply , I am going to click on the blue link about the muscle...xox...