I see....atleast when you don't settle and find the right one, you'll be happy
If you are happily single, post helpful tips here for those who aren't
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I see....atleast when you don't settle and find the right one, you'll be happy
Oops, this was supposed to be a happy singles thread...
Being single is great because... uh... err... because you still haven't experienced meeting and getting to know that special someone! Yeah! That's the most exciting time because... You are learning about them, first kisses, the wedding night, etc.. After two people have known each other a long time the excitement begins to fade.
Redemption!
Quest
I
iliveforHim
Guest
Okay, reading through the initial post, I find that my thoughts must be shared (lol)...I remember once attending a women's Bible study at Church where we would worship at the beginning by singing with the singer that works for the Church, and I remember hearing the words to this one song where she said God was her husband and she was His bride...I remember thinking," HU?? What's that all about???", the concept being so foreign to me. (keep this in mind because it's important)
Months later, after much prayer (about 15 years worth of prayer) God put it in my heart to say goodbye to the man I shared a home and a family with for a very long time. This man is a good man, but he and I simply did not see eye to eye on many issues, and made each other unhappy for the most part...(I like to say he's oil and I'm water, we were just never meant to be together)...so, to leave this gentleman after being with him for so long, and to be on my own, is just not in my nature! I"VE NEVER, do you all hear me?? NEVER liked being alone!!! I have always NEEDED a man to validate my existence, which, yes, I know, is pretty sad...anyway, leaving my ex took ALOT from me, but somehow, even though I was very sad to see something I've had for so long come to an end, even if this something was destroying us both, I had this peace within me, and I know it's because God gave me the serenity and strength to make such a decision.
Now, 6 months later, here I sit, typing to my chat room buddies, sharing this one point: I don't feel I need a man in my life to substantiate me any more. And I finally understand the song where the singer sings about God being her Husband and she being His bride...He meets all of my needs...emotional, spiritual and physical, and what I mean by this is that everything my kids and I need (not want) He provides us with... so, other than the physical intimacy a husband can bring me (which I'm fine without), He provides it all!
So am I happily single? Yes I am! I never thought the day would come when I could be! But with His Grace, Love and support, I can truly say I am, happily single, and as long as God is always by my side, I'll continue to stay that way!
Months later, after much prayer (about 15 years worth of prayer) God put it in my heart to say goodbye to the man I shared a home and a family with for a very long time. This man is a good man, but he and I simply did not see eye to eye on many issues, and made each other unhappy for the most part...(I like to say he's oil and I'm water, we were just never meant to be together)...so, to leave this gentleman after being with him for so long, and to be on my own, is just not in my nature! I"VE NEVER, do you all hear me?? NEVER liked being alone!!! I have always NEEDED a man to validate my existence, which, yes, I know, is pretty sad...anyway, leaving my ex took ALOT from me, but somehow, even though I was very sad to see something I've had for so long come to an end, even if this something was destroying us both, I had this peace within me, and I know it's because God gave me the serenity and strength to make such a decision.
Now, 6 months later, here I sit, typing to my chat room buddies, sharing this one point: I don't feel I need a man in my life to substantiate me any more. And I finally understand the song where the singer sings about God being her Husband and she being His bride...He meets all of my needs...emotional, spiritual and physical, and what I mean by this is that everything my kids and I need (not want) He provides us with... so, other than the physical intimacy a husband can bring me (which I'm fine without), He provides it all!
So am I happily single? Yes I am! I never thought the day would come when I could be! But with His Grace, Love and support, I can truly say I am, happily single, and as long as God is always by my side, I'll continue to stay that way!
Last edited:
G
greatkraw
Guest
Okay, reading through the initial post, I find that my thoughts must be shared (lol)...I remember once attending a women's Bible study at Church where we would worship at the beginning by singing with the singer that works for the Church, and I remember hearing the words to this one song where she said God was her husband and she was His bride...I remember thinking," HU?? What's that all about???", the concept being so foreign to me. (keep this in mind because it's important)
Months later, after much prayer (about 15 years worth of prayer) God put it in my heart to say goodbye to the man I shared a home and a family with for a very long time. This man is a good man, but he and I simply did not see eye to eye on many issues, and made each other unhappy for the most part...(I like to say he's oil and I'm water, we were just never meant to be together)...so, to leave this gentleman after being with him for so long, and to be on my own, is just not in my nature! I"VE NEVER, do you all hear me?? NEVER liked being alone!!! I have always NEEDED a man to validate my existence, which, yes, I know, is pretty sad...anyway, leaving my ex took ALOT from me, but somehow, even though I was very sad to see something I've had for so long come to an end, even if this something was destroying us both, I had this peace within me, and I know it's because God gave me the serenity and strength to make such a decision.
Now, 6 months later, here I sit, typing to my chat room buddies, sharing this one point: I don't feel I need a man in my life to substantiate me any more. And I finally understand the song where the singer sings about God being her Husband and she being His bride...He meets all of my needs...emotional, spiritual and physical, and what I mean by this is that everything my kids and I need (not want) He provides us with... so, other than the physical intimacy a husband can bring me (which I'm fine without), He provides it all!
So am I happily single? Yes I am! I never thought the day would come when I could be! But with His Grace, Love and support, I can truly say I am, happily single, and as long as God is always by my side, I'll continue to stay that way!
someone has to ask you
were you married to this guy?
I
iliveforHim
Guest
Nope.. I loved him very much and wanted us to get married, even with our differences, but every time I would ask him (propose) he would turn me down. His reason was that he did not believe in marriage, and that we already were living as a couple who had children, so why get married? It was important to me because I wanted to be married in the eyes of God, but he didn't feel the same way. It was very painful. The ongoing rejection did quite a bit to my self esteem. I waited for a long time, hoping he would eventually change his mind or that I could somehow help him change his mind. Finally I realised that I can't perform miracles, only God can. But like they say, there's always three sides to every story: mine, his, and the truth...maybe I did not meassure up to what he wanted and it wasn't his shortcoming but mine...who knows? All I know is that I'm content now...something I hadn't been in years.
**sniff, sniff**
oooh, sore subject...didn't know it still hurt...
Nope.. I loved him very much and wanted us to get married, even with our differences, but every time I would ask him (propose) he would turn me down. His reason was that he did not believe in marriage, and that we already were living as a couple who had children, so why get married? It was important to me because I wanted to be married in the eyes of God, but he didn't feel the same way. It was very painful. The ongoing rejection did quite a bit to my self esteem. I waited for a long time, hoping he would eventually change his mind or that I could somehow help him change his mind. Finally I realised that I can't perform miracles, only God can. But like they say, there's always three sides to every story: mine, his, and the truth...maybe I did not meassure up to what he wanted and it wasn't his shortcoming but mine...who knows? All I know is that I'm content now...something I hadn't been in years.
**sniff, sniff**
oooh, sore subject...didn't know it still hurt...
I think you are amazing and brave, and I love how you were vulnerable enough to share what you went through, and showing your trust in the Lord. Thank you, so much! This is a huge encouragement!
God Bless =]
Get a hobby, adopt a child (children are awesome! - when raised right...
), be involved in the Church and wholly committed to God, understand that you are the bride of Christ and cherish that fact, hang out with friends, network, and - if it is in God's will - speed date, blind date, go on arranged dates, etc. Network with people. Come to God in prayer. He loves you immensely and he is close to the broken-hearted.I feel for those who have gone through a divorce, because they can never remarry and be said to be following God's will. Our Savior taught us that to divorce our partner and remarry is to commit adultery (Matthew 19:8-9). In such a case it is a grave burden to be alone, but it is one heaped upon us by our own neglection of God's will. However, I've learned that it is better to be repentantly miserable than to be ashamed of who you are and to turn God against you. As I've said before, all things are possible with God - even happiness in loneliness. To those who are divorced I would say trust in him, pray for his will and examine your hearts.
God almighty and merciful bless you, my friend. Be still. Be patient. Wait on the Lord and be filled with his love. Take it easy, Shining.
J
jesusfreak0016
Guest
I
iliveforHim
Guest
Before I met my ex I did alright in the single life. After we broke up it took time to heal up and be back to normal again. I'd say that relationships have their perks and singleness has its perks. If you have plenty of hobbies, like me, then singleness can be a blessing because it gives you more time to pursue them. Still, I would rather share those hobbies with someone and discover new ones, so eventually I'm going to look for that second half. I don't believe that at this point in eschatology God can satisfy our loneliness if we don't have someone else. God once said that it is not good for the man to be alone. I also don't believe a mate can completely satisfy that loneliness either. They have their own lives and will from time to time return to them.
At any rate, I think while you're waiting for a mate you can help yourself by getting some hobbies or networking. I live out in the woods somewhere. Honestly, I just got so lonely once that going to church or to a supermarket helped because I got to be around a bunch of people. I don't know if any of you are quite to that point yet... I mean, I could go the crazy cat lady approach and tell you to buy a rather large litter of kittens... but I think I'll stop now.
At any rate, I think while you're waiting for a mate you can help yourself by getting some hobbies or networking. I live out in the woods somewhere. Honestly, I just got so lonely once that going to church or to a supermarket helped because I got to be around a bunch of people. I don't know if any of you are quite to that point yet... I mean, I could go the crazy cat lady approach and tell you to buy a rather large litter of kittens... but I think I'll stop now.
H
Hethr
Guest
OK you guys are basically saying to be happy being single because all of the marrieds are unhappy. Come on, I know many very happy Christian married couples. Why can't we desire a happy Christian marriage? It does exist!
So that he who marries his betrothed does well; and he who refrains from marriage will do better. 1 Cor 7:38 RSV
I never gave up the idea of having a girlfriend, but there came a time when I decided I’d rather remain celibate and not marry her. It’s a struggle sometimes, but I suspect this is the only way I can be happy.
If you have prayed over this and decided the Lord wants you to stay single, then walk with the Lord always—have a personal relationship with him. He can always make your life full.