The past couple of days my faith has been like a roller coaster,
I would have a lot of faith a few times during the day but not for a long time
and every morning when I wake up it seems like my faith has just ran away.
And I keep having OCD thoughts and blasphemous thoughts that I don't want at all
and I repent of them but still my faith is still pretty low.
And I keep having a hard time KEEPING my faith in Jesus and don't know why.
I don't think I'm rejecting Jesus and I don't want to but I don't know why my faith keeps dwindling though.
I don't want to harden my heart against God because I love God
but I don't know why I can't keep my faith when I have it and why I feel so far from God.
I don't like feeling far from God and I DISLIKE IT SO MUCH when I my faith in Jesus is so low.
I'm afraid that I am unknowingly hardening my heart by accident.
Is there a reason why my faith keeps dropping and why I feel so far from God?
How come these OCD thoughts can convince me so easily about lies
but I can't convince myself of the absolute truth?
Dear
Danielle,
PRAISE GOD!
For He is working in you, both to will and to do of His good pleasure.
You are His workmanship!
The very fact that you are experiencing this conflict is the one sure evidence of your salvation, that Satan cannot replicate.
You are in God's hands, just stop looking inward.
For you will only see your failure there.
The old nature cannot be improved, it cannot please God.
The new nature you received on believing is from above and is perfect.
These two co-exist within you.
The one has been condemned and will die.
The other is of God and is eternal.
The way to overcome is to starve the one and feed the other.
The food of the Spirit is the Word of God, so get plenty of it.
The desires of the old nature are sensuous and fleshly and are activated and enlivened by stimulus designed for that purpose, whether base or refined: it needs little imagination to know what those things are.
The flesh, the world and the devil are the enemy of the spirit.
Remember Eve who was influenced by
the lust of the flesh,
the lust of the eyes,
and the pride of life.
Read the Word, and concentrate upon the things of God, in Christ Jesus, and rejoice that you are a Child of God, Danielle. Don't struggle or strain against thoughts or feelings, which are deceitful. Reckon on the completeness of the finished work of Christ, and Praise God for His grace.
Your faith, whether small or great is not the issue, for it is the Faith of Christ that we trust in and that will never fail. He is not only the
'Author' of your faith, He is also the
'Finisher' of it. The work God has begun in you, in Christ Jesus, He will continue to do until the day of Christ.
So be strong and of a good courage, Danielle. We have all been there.
With love in Christ Jesus
Chris