Is it Okay to Divorce Your Wife if You Give Her a Piece of Paper?

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Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
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#41
It was in response to what someone said in another thread. It seemed worth it's own thread.

I am also grieved to see the large number of divorces and remarriages, especially among church people.
In islam, the husband just has to say 'I divorce you' three times to his wife and its considered done.
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
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#42
It was in response to what someone said in another thread. It seemed worth it's own thread.

I am also grieved to see the large number of divorces and remarriages, especially among church people.
Why do you differentiate from church people verses people that may not be church people?
 

presidente

Senior Member
May 29, 2013
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#43
Why do you differentiate from church people verses people that may not be church people?
The world doesn't know better. It bothers me more to see professing Christians have marriages that end in divorce.
 

presidente

Senior Member
May 29, 2013
9,164
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#44
sorry Kings dont get paid though they are often worshipped and adored, though if the public dont like you they could behead you and put your head on a coin.
I don't think that's how the king's head gets on the coin.
 

RodB651

Well-known member
Feb 11, 2021
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#45
Is it ok to divorce your wife if you give her a piece of paper?

Well, she insisted on that piece of paper, so I gave her one.
When one party insist on the divorce, you go with it. Yeah, that doesn't make it right, but like I've said somewhere here before, divorce isn't the only thing on the sin list.
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
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#46
The world doesn't know better. It bothers me more to see professing Christians have marriages that end in divorce.
There are those that are not 'church people' yet are confessing Christians.
 

presidente

Senior Member
May 29, 2013
9,164
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#49
They happen anyway!
What I mean is that some insistent demands for divorce in marital arguments get quelled.

I suppose one way of handling the game where a wife professes Christian faith, wants to demand a divorce, then wait her husband out until he dates or married, claim he actually was the one who committed adultery because he married instead of waiting to reconciled, so she can claim she is okay to remarry.... is this. If the law permits it, let her do a unilateral divorce, don't sign it, then tell her you never gave her a writing of divorcement, so even under OT law, she isn't properly divorced.
 

presidente

Senior Member
May 29, 2013
9,164
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#50
So....
Today around 65-70% of all divorces are started by the wife.

It's not men divorcing their wives its women divorcing their husbands.

And ladies....once he is gone he is GONE.

A girlfriend is just as good as a wife?

Well, Christians know one can't copulate with one's girlfriends without sinning. Some Christian men want that, and also the children such activities could produce. Christian marriage and two becoming one flesh reflects the mystery of Christ and the church. Fornication, on the other hand, is sin.
 

presidente

Senior Member
May 29, 2013
9,164
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#51
If everyone did that in all cases, there would be a lot more divorces.
When one party insists on a divorce, the other can insist on no divorce. If the divorcing party persists, make it just as hard as possible and don't cooperate until you have too. Also, as a man, don't move out of the house or away from the kids or you can create a situation where she gets the kids for her betrayal and you have to pay child support.

I think if the wife says she wants a divorce... which is a foolish thing to say but some women say it... and the man wants to 'call her bluff' or teach her a lesson or he just gets caught up in the emotion and goes ahead with it, as the head, that carries a lot of weight, that agreement, even if the head is going the wrong way.

It's better to think of her as a child having a tantrum, stay calm. Tell her no, that's not right and she shouldn't say such things.

In some marriages, it is the man threatening divorce, too. So it depends on the people and the dynamic of their relationship.
 

Fillan

Well-known member
Oct 25, 2022
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#52
In islam, the husband just has to say 'I divorce you' three times to his wife and its considered done.
I read there are many thousands of converts from 'Christianity' to Islam in England and the average profile of a convert is a 27-year old white woman. Just a little snippit. Kind Regards.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
27,449
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#53
It's better to think of her as a child having a tantrum, stay calm. Tell her no, that's not right and she shouldn't say such things.
Yeah, right, that's sooooo effective when dealing with a woman who disagrees with you. Just treat her like a child having a tantrum. :rolleyes:

I hear it's also super effective to tell her to calm down. Women love it when you tell them to calm down. :LOL:
 

JohnDB

Well-known member
Jan 16, 2021
6,241
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#54
When one party insists on a divorce, the other can insist on no divorce. If the divorcing party persists, make it just as hard as possible and don't cooperate until you have too. Also, as a man, don't move out of the house or away from the kids or you can create a situation where she gets the kids for her betrayal and you have to pay child support.

I think if the wife says she wants a divorce... which is a foolish thing to say but some women say it... and the man wants to 'call her bluff' or teach her a lesson or he just gets caught up in the emotion and goes ahead with it, as the head, that carries a lot of weight, that agreement, even if the head is going the wrong way.

It's better to think of her as a child having a tantrum, stay calm. Tell her no, that's not right and she shouldn't say such things.

In some marriages, it is the man threatening divorce, too. So it depends on the people and the dynamic of their relationship.
So you suggest and recommend harassment of the wife who wants to leave? Make her life as difficult as possible?
Where's the scripture supporting that? In fact I know that this sounds like abuse which is highly condemned in scripture.

Polygamy is not condemned though....and in fact mandated in particular circumstances. (I'd never want to marry my brother's wife...NOT my cup of tea)

If she doesn't want you let her go....don't force yourself into her life.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
27,449
9,429
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#55
So you suggest and recommend harassment of the wife who wants to leave? Make her life as difficult as possible?
Where's the scripture supporting that? In fact I know that this sounds like abuse which is highly condemned in scripture.

Polygamy is not condemned though....and in fact mandated in particular circumstances. (I'd never want to marry my brother's wife...NOT my cup of tea)

If she doesn't want you let her go....don't force yourself into her life.
Yeah I think I remember the Bible saying something about that. If an unbelieving spouse is pleased to stay with you, let the spouse stay. If the unbelieving spouse gotta go, let the spouse go. Or something like that, rough paraphrase.
 

presidente

Senior Member
May 29, 2013
9,164
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#56
So you suggest and recommend harassment of the wife who wants to leave? Make her life as difficult as possible?
Where's the scripture supporting that? In fact I know that this sounds like abuse which is highly condemned in scripture.
This is along the lines of me responding to your post with, "So you want to beat up little puppies." I did not say abuse your wife, or make her __life___ as difficult as possible. One can just not make it easy to divorce-- not go along with her agenda to divorce, don't sign the paper., just do what you legally have to do as far as going to court. Christians I know who do not believe in divorce who are divorced by flighty spouses often do such things while praying for reconciliation.

That would include not leaving the house just because she wants you to. If the children live in the home, then the judge may say the husband is out of the house, the wife lives there, and so as not to disrupt the children's lives and school routines, the wife gets primary custody, and the husband can pay child support. So the husband could end up in a car or in his parents basement, having to pay to keep up the wife and kids along with his own residence. This is particularly unjust when the wife is being unfaithful to her commitment, deciding she just wants to live life alone.

I know a man whose wife left him recently, two actually, but one I know more about. He's been praying for reconciliation, and still is. He kept the process going as long as it could go instead of just signing away his marriage.

Why should someone enable another person who wants to do evil?

If she doesn't want you let her go....don't force yourself into her life.
That's good advice if you are dating. It is not good to be a stalker. I had one once, and it isn't fun. But I hadn't made any commitments, hadn't shown interest, and then had to be quite explicit that I wasn't interested, and still got stalked.

If a couple are in a fight, and one of them suggests divorce, the other doesn't have to respond in kind, and if they calm down and want a divorce, the other one doesn't have to run to the lawyers and get the legal papers, either.