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shortstuff
Guest
Im 3 years out not to actually. Ive been with someone a for while now but sometimes truly feel we are on different pages and Im lost I really don't want to start over again.
I think it's ok not to be ready yet. Well, I hope it is anyway... because as much as I want to be ready to be in another relationship, moving towards marriage I'm not sure I am.
Being widowed is not like a break-up, and it's not like divorce. In both of those, typically love has died long before the end and the end is a relief (though don't get me wrong it has it's own deep heartache).
What I wouldn't give for one more hug, one more "I love you", just... more time. But even that wouldn't be enough, would it?
I picture my experience in readying myself for whatever new man may come into my life as adding on an additional room. The room that contained my first marriage wasn't torn down, the door is closed and I can visit the memories any time I'd like, but there is till space in my heart and life for someone new to love and to be loved by.
The struggle is between those two places I suppose. Wanting to honor my husband... and what lies ahead.
I have found that I am clinging to my relationship with God. As we all should, but it's a lovely place here too. I'm learning more about Him, more about me. Growth and healing in one.
Praying for you, ShortStuff!
Being widowed is not like a break-up, and it's not like divorce. In both of those, typically love has died long before the end and the end is a relief (though don't get me wrong it has it's own deep heartache).
What I wouldn't give for one more hug, one more "I love you", just... more time. But even that wouldn't be enough, would it?
I picture my experience in readying myself for whatever new man may come into my life as adding on an additional room. The room that contained my first marriage wasn't torn down, the door is closed and I can visit the memories any time I'd like, but there is till space in my heart and life for someone new to love and to be loved by.
The struggle is between those two places I suppose. Wanting to honor my husband... and what lies ahead.
I have found that I am clinging to my relationship with God. As we all should, but it's a lovely place here too. I'm learning more about Him, more about me. Growth and healing in one.
Praying for you, ShortStuff!