Out of my league

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When thinking about this almost every romance has this element.

Like Aladdin, pauper gets wishes granted by Genie, becomes a prince to win the beautiful Princess Jasmine who is no longer out of his league as he's got a magic carpet to take her out for rides. She's from the palace, he's a common thief from the streets.

Or in Grease, where Sandy is too sweet and innocent and good for Danny who thinks he's too cool for school. In the end he has a flying car cos he's been working on it at the workshop which he's transformed from an old banger. She's from Australia, he's from America.

In Pretty Woman, a hooker gets a makeover and her client falls in love with her, who she meets when she takes him for a ride in a car he can't drive. He's a ruthless business tycoon, she's just a streetwalker with a heart of gold

They all have in common some kind of vehicle that gets them from A to B. Or they get together on the Titanic...and then it hits an iceberg and sinks.
 
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Literally,
There are 10,000 "pretty" women for each tall, "successful " guy.

and older men gravitate towards younger and younger women....like one half plus 7 is acceptable plus all points in between to a couple of years older.....wider range of availability for men than women.



30 y.o. man....15+7=22y.o. woman. And generally speaking, young men's tastes have changed. A scantily clad woman might gain a moment's attention....but that's it.

https://twitter.com/x/status/2060719590158508412
 
Love is only true in fairy tales
Or movies

It isn't anywhere else. Guys just want a hooker, they don't want wives. Gals don't want to be a wife, there's nothing in it for them. A poor guy gets a live-in maid, but what do women get out of the deal ? Bondage.
Even if the guy is rich, it's still bondage in a gilded cage and he'll probably cheat on her.

Children? Children grow up and leave. Also you can have children without being married, there's no law against it.
I'm a cynic lol

After 2 years, a marriage or relationship that ends, gets half property rights, according to the court, so it might be slightly better to marry a rich man who has a house, as they have to pay alimony, or child support or some such. If the guy is poor and doesn't marry you or abandons you and any children, you can claim solo mum benefit. Widows get whatever, but the husband has to um...die.

So there's no reasons to marry, unless its money or property. It's better to be friends no? Sure you can date, but you can't date someone forever.
 
If marriage is love it tends to be based on a lot of conditions!

God's love is said to be unconditional, and there is no such thing as leagues with God. God is never out of anyones league, as He''ll never leave you, nor forsake you, and is with you 24/7.

He's always been good, there's never been a time He wasn't. We don't deserve His grace, but being human, apparently we do, if we are humble enough to ask for it. We can't buy or earn His love, it's given freely.

Anyway, just some thoughts on the whole 'out of my league' thing.

The issue really is, what is the cost of living? If you can't afford to live somewhere, you need to move somewhere that's cheaper. I mean you could work hard and save every penny, but then you'd be a workaholic with no time for your relationship.

If you can afford, good for you, cos it's actually pretty expensive to be a human now, especially if you are female. Also, make sure you buy enough clothes. Nobody wants to be a scantily clad woman lol
 
Lanolin said:
There's no loniliness epidemic in my country. We're all very connected, its the domestic violence and bullying and child abuse that's more the problem.
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I stumbled across this movie a couple of hours ago while looking for a member's music videos on YouTube. I had no idea what the movie was about, but the title grabbed me, and I am glad that I watched it. It is a Christian movie, and its theme is directly related to something that you said in your post. That is all that I will say.

 
Ok I came across this phrase in a book I was reading. Yes sometimes I do read romance.

So the long convoluted plot is basically in a nutshell.

Girl's best guy friend is now getting married. Girl has found out she has feelings for her best friend but he doesn't feel the same for her, as...he's getting married. Girl is invited to his wedding. She meets his fiance for the first time. The fiance is beautiful and well maintained and the girl feels ugly and unattractive slob in comparison.

But...wait there's more! Her new friend who she bumped into in a meet-cute has been helping her out and they get along fine its just girl still has feelings for best friend but meet-cute guy starts to have feelings for her when his previous gf walks out on him. Oh He is Mr Perfect and girl sees his previous gf who is like a supermodel and out of her league too. So she had no idea of his feelings for her, until they do the big kiss but he has to check on her best guy friend who jilts his fiance at the altar cos he still has feelings for girl.

ANYWAY Girl was jealous of other girlfriends because of 'competition' and boys were jealous of other boyfriends because of 'competition' as there's only so many hearts to go around. And no you can't do a three-way kiss or group hug. No, love triangles happen for a reason and you can't flatten a love triangle into a square.

But main point of plot is only after girl wears revealing tight dress that Mr Perfect realises his 'feelings' cos otherwise its just another human being wearing a sack like everyone else and no you can't love someone who wears a sack according to the rules of chicklit romance. Has to be Cinderella vintage gown or nothing.
 
passion84god said:
I stumbled across this movie a couple of hours ago while looking for a member's music videos on YouTube. I had no idea what the movie was about, but the title grabbed me, and I am glad that I watched it. It is a Christian movie, and its theme is directly related to something that you said in your post. That is all that I will say.

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ok may check it out if have the time.
I hope is not another girl loses braces/crutches and glasses, gets makeover, now all guys want her kind of story.
 
Lanolin said:
ok may check it out if have the time.
I hope is not another girl loses braces/crutches and glasses, gets makeover, now all guys want her kind of story.
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It's nothing like that. It's about bullying and how damaging our words and actions can be.​
 
passion84god said:
It's nothing like that. It's about bullying and how damaging our words and actions can be.​
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ok, interesting.
Wait are you saying I'm bullying or damaging? Or I've been bullied or damaged. Cos I can't think where I mentioned that in posts in this thread...
 
Oh Ok the twitter thing.
Yes that was bad. Public opinion can be very shaming, but on platforms like twitter where people can gang up on you easily and say horrible things with no moderation/consequences its very dangerous. Espeically for those with low self-esteem.

What people didn't see about Charlotte Dawson was that she was adopted,,,her parents abandoned her as a baby. So she was vulnerable to what people thought of her.
 
Lanolin said:
ok, interesting.
Wait are you saying I'm bullying or damaging? Or I've been bullied or damaged. Cos I can't think where I mentioned that in posts in this thread...
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You mentioned bullying in post #86.
 
Lanolin said:
Also, what no pics of breastfeeding right? Cos mamas don't do that anymore. Apparently.
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It is actually unhealthy for a newborn to not receive "mother's milk" while a baby - because, it helps to build an immune system that will help them for their entire lifetime.

Mothers - please do not deprive your newborn children of your breast milk - it is one of the best things you can ever do for them.

The 'formula' products you buy in the store are not good for your baby - your breast milk IS.
 
Lanolin said:
Question, what do men mean when they say this - she's out of my league?
I'm not a fan of rugby, so not sure why they would say this. It seems to be an American term that guys use for supposedly 'high maintainence' women but aren't ALL women high maintainence, or even if they aren't and have simple needs, children are! They cost a lot of money.

So is it just a way of saying for men that they don't really want to marry or date a woman cos it would be too expensive?
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No, I think a lot of men are intimidated by women who are very well dressed, super attractive and financially well off. Why would she look twice at a man in an average car, an average job and with average income? There is also the concern that some guy with money and charm would lure her away.

Sure, some men have resorted to crime to pay for the lifestyle of someone they are obsessed with. That's not common.
 
GaryA said:
It is actually unhealthy for a newborn to not receive "mother's milk" while a baby - because, it helps to build an immune system that will help them for their entire lifetime.

Mothers - please do not deprive your newborn children of your breast milk - it is one of the best things you can ever do for them.

The 'formula' products you buy in the store are not good for your baby - your breast milk IS.
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I don't think anybody is but lots of mothers I know just couldn't breastfeed. It didn't work out for them.
My mum didn't. Some mothers just don't have any milk. I remember getting fed SMA. Mum had to sterilise the bottles, etc. When I was put on cows milk (homogenised) apparently my rash or whatever cleared up.

I think it's better now though La Leche are champions of helping mothers breastfeed, but many mothers do have problems with mastitis or getting babies to latch on.

Also, in some public places there is no place for mothers to breastfeed, like she can't do it at work, she can't do it at a cafe etc. If she's to do it, the only place would be a smelly public toilet or something. Because it's frowned upon to breastfeed your baby apparently. But NZ made it legal that's a mother's right anywhere. Its. a basic human right.

Big scandal in China with contaminated formula - it had melamine in it (plastic) and caused 6 infants to die and gave kidney stones and other health problems to hundreds of thousands more. My mum said if mothers couldn't breastfeed in China they had wet nurses or fed their babies rice milk in the olden days. There never used to be formula.
 
Gideon300 said:
No, I think a lot of men are intimidated by women who are very well dressed, super attractive and financially well off. Why would she look twice at a man in an average car, an average job and with average income? There is also the concern that some guy with money and charm would lure her away.

Sure, some men have resorted to crime to pay for the lifestyle of someone they are obsessed with. That's not common.
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maybe he's handsome and kind and she doesn't notice the average car, job and doesn't ask about his income. IDK. Maybe he does a superhuman feat of rescuing her from jumping off the Titanic.

Otherwise, she's probably a snob. Lots of women are, let's face it.
 
GaryA said:
I may be inclined to question this statement with regard to the reality of things today...
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The reality is that unless something drastic happens we are looking at a complete societal collapse in about 20 years.

We have about 45% of women willing to get married. On top of that less than 20% of women today want or desire children.

And we are readily heading towards those numbers as a reality.

Meaning....we need every willing woman to have a minimum of 4-6 children....2 or 3 is insufficient to cut it anymore. We need children like you really wouldn't believe. It is an epidemic. A very serious one.


All those "Help Wanted" signs in your neighborhood for restaurants, grocery stores, and etc(teenager jobs).....its going to get much much worse....into things like police, firefighters, military, nursing and medical.....repair technicians....

Even without an increase we are looking at a societal reshuffle in 10 years regardless.
 
Now I'm wondering if being high-class or whatever is a 'lifestyle'?
I mean nobility and aristocratic people are usually born to it - not really a choice, its just what they are used to. They usually don't condescend to live with or marry someone 'beneath them'

A prince or princess usually does not marry a pauper. Maybe we are more caste-based than we realise.

I was brought up in NZ and we had this kind of I suppose, ideaology, that we were 'egalitarian' society or people. That there were no class differences between people, that we were all kind of equal. Of course now I'm thinking that's not true, and maybe...it never was.

Because of Jesus example, there was no rich nor poor, slave nor free, male nor female, greek nor jew, all were ONE in Christ. I clung to that ideal that we were all just human beings trying to make our way in this fallen world, and that we all bled the same, that we all go through suffering, and maybe it didn't matter who you loved or fell in love with, as long as you both loved each other.

But now I'm thinking, it's not the case. We are totally judgemental and conditional, and everyone cares about the flesh and the world more than the spirit. Our young are economic units, to be used as the government sees fit. Certain races will always be seen as inferior. Women will always be subject to men. Children have no rights to speak up or change anything. Rich people will always have an advantage and privelige over poor, and many will resent those who they see are getting a 'free ride' or a 'free lunch'. There is now a HUGE gap between rich and poor, we never used to have homeless in our country, now there are people living on the streets next to mansions all the time. And many DO resort to crime to afford a 'lifestyle'. White-collar crims are just as numerous as petty thieves.

One thing about my library training that was wrong though, was the 'digital divide' or fears that we would see a gap betwen those who had tech and those who didn't, when actually there's no such thing, its more who's literate and who's illiterate.
 
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