Please pray for me

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Evita

New member
Jun 20, 2026
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3
I am 21 years old, but every decision I have made in my life has been without guidance from someone older and more experienced. Looking back now, I feel that many of those decisions were foolish, and they have brought me to a point where I feel hopeless about my future.

Right now, I feel ashamed, guilty, useless, and insecure. I worry that I will never be able to get a decent job and that I will continue to burden my parents again and again. At a time when I should be taking care of them as they enter their sixties, the opposite is happening. I still cannot give them the comfortable and enjoyable life they deserve after all the hardships they have endured throughout their lives.

I feel so guilty that I sometimes think about ending my life. The poor decisions I made regarding my education weigh heavily on me. There are moments when I want everything to end, as if I convince myself that after death my soul would simply disappear and cease to exist.

Yet I am a Christian. Although I am not always faithful or obedient in my faith, I do believe in Christ. That is why I am confused about how I can think about death and imagine my soul disappearing when I also believe in heaven and hell.
 
Yet I am a Christian. Although I am not always faithful or obedient in my faith, I do believe in Christ. That is why I am confused about how I can think about death and imagine my soul disappearing when I also believe in heaven and hell.
"Fear not" says the Lord. Jesus has a full understanding of the human condition as he once walked the earth in his human form. Trust in Jesus dying for your sins and the Holy Spirit to comfort and guide you in the life-long repentance process. It seems to me that you are well on your way in your faith journey. I will offer a prayer for you too.
 
I am not always faithful or obedient in my faith, I do believe in Christ. That is why I am confused about how I can think about death and imagine my soul disappearing when I also believe in heaven and hell.
Precious friend @Evita , I will pray for you:

Please Be Very Richly Encouraged And Edified and
Comforted In Christ, and In His Precious Word Of Truth:

God's Grace Word for our infirmities!

+
Overcoming Depression Biblically And Naturally (Part I)
+

Overcoming Depression Biblically And Naturally (Part II)

Amen.

----------
And, precious friend(s), Please Be Very Richly Encouraged and Edified
In The Lord Jesus Christ and In His Precious Word Of Truth, Rightly
Divided:


The Bible: The BIG Picture

Amen.
 
  • Heart
Reactions: Evita
"Fear not" says the Lord. Jesus has a full understanding of the human condition as he once walked the earth in his human form. Trust in Jesus dying for your sins and the Holy Spirit to comfort and guide you in the life-long repentance process. It seems to me that you are well on your way in your faith journey. I will offer a prayer for you too.
Thank you so much for the words and for your prayers. I truly appreciate it, its given me comfort and hope. And I will remember this. Thank you
 
It's natural to want to get a job and work to provide for your parents. A lack of work is a problem in many parts of the world so you are not alone. As a Christian, your job is to do your best effort and surrender the outcome to God. This doesn't mean that you should give up when times are tough, they may get better, they may not but God does hear your prayers. Keep praying and doing your best for your faith is an active faith.
 
I feel so guilty that I sometimes think about ending my life.
Hi, Evita.

Jesus laid down his life to bear your guilt. I don't know if you have ever read Isaiah chapter 53 or not, but it was a prophecy about Jesus and what he would accomplish for us through his sufferings on our behalves. Here it is in its entirety. I have bold-faced certain parts for emphasis.​

Isaiah 53​

1 Who hath believed our report? and to whom is the arm of the Lord revealed?
2 For he shall grow up before him as a tender plant, and as a root out of a dry ground: he hath no form nor comeliness; and when we shall see him, there is no beauty that we should desire him
3 He is despised and rejected of men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief: and we hid as it were our faces from him; he was despised, and we esteemed him not.
4 Surely he hath borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows: yet we did esteem him stricken, smitten of God, and afflicted.
5 But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed.
6 All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned every one to his own way; and the Lord hath laid on him the iniquity of us all.
7 He was oppressed, and he was afflicted, yet he opened not his mouth: he is brought as a lamb to the slaughter, and as a sheep before her shearers is dumb, so he openeth not his mouth.
8 He was taken from prison and from judgment: and who shall declare his generation? for he was cut off out of the land of the living: for the transgression of my people was he stricken.
9 And he made his grave with the wicked, and with the rich in his death; because he had done no violence, neither was any deceit in his mouth.
10 Yet it pleased the Lord to bruise him; he hath put him to grief: when thou shalt make his soul an offering for sin, he shall see his seed, he shall prolong his days, and the pleasure of the Lord shall prosper in his hand.
11 He shall see of the travail of his soul, and shall be satisfied: by his knowledge shall my righteous servant justify many; for he shall bear their iniquities.
12 Therefore will I divide him a portion with the great, and he shall divide the spoil with the strong; because he hath poured out his soul unto death: and he was numbered with the transgressors; and he bare the sin of many, and made intercession for the transgressors.

Evita, while on the cross, Jesus Christ bore your griefs and carried your sorrows. He was wounded for your transgressions, he was bruised for your iniquities, the chastisement or punishment necessary to bring you peace with God was upon him, and by his stripes or wounds you are healed. It pleased God the Father to bruise Jesus and to make him an offering for your sins. God the Father saw the travail of Jesus' soul AND WAS SATISFIED. Evita, no sufferings of your own are required because Jesus fully satisfied God's demand for justice in your place. Through faith in Christ you are saved and justified. This, Evita, is the good news.

Please do not think about harming yourself because Jesus has already been sufficiently harmed in your place. Again, you can not add to his sacrifice. You simply need to receive him as your Lord and Savior by faith in that which he has already accomplished on your behalf. In doing so, you will gain the hope of eternal life in his kingdom that is yet to come. Evita, you are only 21 years old. Think of the thief on the cross. He truly wasted his entire life, and yet he found salvation through faith in Christ shortly before his dying breath. Don't let the devil lie to you. You can find peace with God through Christ, and God has plenty of time to show himself strong on your behalf. Your future is bright in Christ.

I will pray for you. God bless you.​
 
Hi, Evita.

Jesus laid down his life to bear your guilt. I don't know if you have ever read Isaiah chapter 53 or not, but it was a prophecy about Jesus and what he would accomplish for us through his sufferings on our behalves. Here it is in its entirety. I have bold-faced certain parts for emphasis.​

Isaiah 53​

1 Who hath believed our report? and to whom is the arm of the Lord revealed?
2 For he shall grow up before him as a tender plant, and as a root out of a dry ground: he hath no form nor comeliness; and when we shall see him, there is no beauty that we should desire him
3 He is despised and rejected of men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief: and we hid as it were our faces from him; he was despised, and we esteemed him not.
4 Surely he hath borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows: yet we did esteem him stricken, smitten of God, and afflicted.
5 But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed.
6 All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned every one to his own way; and the Lord hath laid on him the iniquity of us all.
7 He was oppressed, and he was afflicted, yet he opened not his mouth: he is brought as a lamb to the slaughter, and as a sheep before her shearers is dumb, so he openeth not his mouth.
8 He was taken from prison and from judgment: and who shall declare his generation? for he was cut off out of the land of the living: for the transgression of my people was he stricken.
9 And he made his grave with the wicked, and with the rich in his death; because he had done no violence, neither was any deceit in his mouth.
10 Yet it pleased the Lord to bruise him; he hath put him to grief: when thou shalt make his soul an offering for sin, he shall see his seed, he shall prolong his days, and the pleasure of the Lord shall prosper in his hand.
11 He shall see of the travail of his soul, and shall be satisfied: by his knowledge shall my righteous servant justify many; for he shall bear their iniquities.
12 Therefore will I divide him a portion with the great, and he shall divide the spoil with the strong; because he hath poured out his soul unto death: and he was numbered with the transgressors; and he bare the sin of many, and made intercession for the transgressors.

Evita, while on the cross, Jesus Christ bore your griefs and carried your sorrows. He was wounded for your transgressions, he was bruised for your iniquities, the chastisement or punishment necessary to bring you peace with God was upon him, and by his stripes or wounds you are healed. It pleased God the Father to bruise Jesus and to make him an offering for your sins. God the Father saw the travail of Jesus' soul AND WAS SATISFIED. Evita, no sufferings of your own are required because Jesus fully satisfied God's demand for justice in your place. Through faith in Christ you are saved and justified. This, Evita, is the good news.

Please do not think about harming yourself because Jesus has already been sufficiently harmed in your place. Again, you can not add to his sacrifice. You simply need to receive him as your Lord and Savior by faith in that which he has already accomplished on your behalf. In doing so, you will gain the hope of eternal life in his kingdom that is yet to come. Evita, you are only 21 years old. Think of the thief on the cross. He truly wasted his entire life, and yet he found salvation through faith in Christ shortly before his dying breath. Don't let the devil lie to you. You can find peace with God through Christ, and God has plenty of time to show himself strong on your behalf. Your future is bright in Christ.

I will pray for you. God bless you.​
Dude, you are starting to sound really familiar... Have you been here before under another name? Just curious.
 
Dude, you are starting to sound really familiar... Have you been here before under another name? Just curious.
You asked me that once before, and the answer is still no. Why are you bothering me when I am trying to minister the gospel to someone who has thoughts of suicide? I am sorry, bro, but that is something you need to deal with.
 
You asked me that once before, and the answer is still no. Why are you bothering me when I am trying to minister the gospel to someone who has thoughts of suicide? I am sorry, bro, but that is something you need to deal with.
Wait, what? I definitely have not ever asked passion84god that before.
 
I am 21 years old, but every decision I have made in my life has been without guidance from someone older and more experienced. Looking back now, I feel that many of those decisions were foolish, and they have brought me to a point where I feel hopeless about my future.

Right now, I feel ashamed, guilty, useless, and insecure. I worry that I will never be able to get a decent job and that I will continue to burden my parents again and again. At a time when I should be taking care of them as they enter their sixties, the opposite is happening. I still cannot give them the comfortable and enjoyable life they deserve after all the hardships they have endured throughout their lives.

I feel so guilty that I sometimes think about ending my life. The poor decisions I made regarding my education weigh heavily on me.
Cultural pressures are not God's pressure. Suicides from academic pressures in certain countries is shameful, for the love of money is the root of all evil. The world inflicts burdens that are not from the Lord.

Jesus said, Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.

There are moments when I want everything to end, as if I convince myself that after death my soul would simply disappear and cease to exist.
The Lord also knows how you feel. If you trust Him through this and put your faith in Him He will save you. The Devil tempts us at our weakest moments of depression. He wants you to think that you have the option of non-existence because he's a liar and killer.
Jesus warned over and over and over again, " it is better for thee to enter halt into life, than having two feet to be cast into hell, into the fire that never shall be quenched: 46Where their worm dieth not, and the fire is not quenched.

Jesus also warned about a man who was tormented in flames but could not get so much as a drop of water. Death and eternity is very serious.
Yet I am a Christian. Although I am not always faithful or obedient in my faith, I do believe in Christ. That is why I am confused about how I can think about death and imagine my soul disappearing when I also believe in heaven and hell.

It is probably from mixing faith in Christ with your own obedience. I am not obedient as I aught to be either.
God knows we are not obedient.
God also knows we do not deserve to be forgiven and go to Heaven one day. This is why He suffered for us. He alone paid for our sins all by Himself. We cannot add to that all sufficient sacrifice by our own works of obedience. This is God's grace, His kindness that we can't earn or deserve.

Not by works of righteousness which we have done, but according to His mercy He saved us.
Titus 3:5

For by grace are you saved through faith and that, not of yourselves, it is the gift of God, not if works lest any man should boast.
Ephesians 2

Does that make sense so far?
 
Wait, what? I definitely have not ever asked passion84god that before.
Are you serious?


I admittedly live somewhat of an isolated life, but you playing Inspector Clouseau on a thread where someone is asking for prayer so she doesn't kill herself is the most insensitive thing I have ever witnessed in my life. And now I am a part of it, to my own shame. The next time that you feel called to a life of detective work while suffering memory loss, just DM me.

I will walk away for a few days because right now I am fixing to rebuke your head off. I desire no personal apology from you, but I hope that you have the decency to apologize to the young woman whose thread you so insensitively disrupted.

To the young lady who started this thread, I am deeply, deeply sorry that you had to witness any of this. This is Christianity at its worst, and I am truly sorry that I was a part of it.​
 
Are you serious?


I admittedly live somewhat of an isolated life, but you playing Inspector Clouseau on a thread where someone is asking for prayer so she doesn't kill herself is the most insensitive thing I have ever witnessed in my life. And now I am a part of it, to my own shame. The next time that you feel called to a life of detective work while suffering memory loss, just DM me.

I will walk away for a few days because right now I am fixing to rebuke your head off. I desire no personal apology from you, but I hope that you have the decency to apologize to the young woman whose thread you so insensitively disrupted.

To the young lady who started this thread, I am deeply, deeply sorry that you had to witness any of this. This is Christianity at its worst, and I am truly sorry that I was a part of it.​
Oh yeah! I forgot about that.

Sorry. My bad.
 
Cultural pressures are not God's pressure. Suicides from academic pressures in certain countries is shameful, for the love of money is the root of all evil. The world inflicts burdens that are not from the Lord.
Dear @Evita ,
I reread my post and don't want you to misunderstand because I wasn't clear. I'm not trying to put any more guilt on you. I meant that the cultural pressures from outside that are put upon young adults can be shameful. It's like there's a special premium on Drs and lawyers but other employment is not of much value. That's what I noticed with certain minorities in America. However, college education and money is a god to some. As a Christian I see that idol to be hurtful and destructive to many.
Now I can make bad lawyer and Dr jokes since I've known a few. I have as much respect for the janitors and judge according to scriptures instead. We are told to judge not according to appearance, but righteousness judgement. John 7:24 KJV

Just know that you are going through a season of depression and need God's grace. He gives more grace to the humble.
You are in a special place in life where I assume you are with your parents. That has challenges too, but opportunities to grow closer. As you will learn that love is most important and you already expressed love for them. No doubt they love you more than you realize. That's a good place to start talking with them about what you are going through. Don't put it off. Today is probably as good a time as any. You need this heavy burden off your shoulders.
Jesus said, Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.


The Lord also knows how you feel. If you trust Him through this and put your faith in Him He will save you. The Devil tempts us at our weakest moments of depression. He wants you to think that you have the option of non-existence because he's a liar and killer.
Jesus warned over and over and over again, " it is better for thee to enter halt into life, than having two feet to be cast into hell, into the fire that never shall be quenched: 46Where their worm dieth not, and the fire is not quenched.

Jesus also warned about a man who was tormented in flames but could not get so much as a drop of water. Death and eternity is very serious.


It is probably from mixing faith in Christ with your own obedience. I am not obedient as I aught to be either.
God knows we are not obedient.
God also knows we do not deserve to be forgiven and go to Heaven one day. This is why He suffered for us. He alone paid for our sins all by Himself. We cannot add to that all sufficient sacrifice by our own works of obedience. This is God's grace, His kindness that we can't earn or deserve.

Not by works of righteousness which we have done, but according to His mercy He saved us.
Titus 3:5

For by grace are you saved through faith and that, not of yourselves, it is the gift of God, not if works lest any man should boast.
Ephesians 2

Does that make sense so far?
Keep in touch and let us know how you are doing. We are praying for you.
 
  • Pray
Reactions: GRACE_ambassador
GFHlItnXkAAOdcd - Copy - Copy - Copy (2).jpg
'I pray your relationship with God becomes your strength and guidance
in all your coming and going. I hope each day you find time to have a quiet
time with Christ, and to know you are in good company, and that all is well.
'Amen'

man-praying - Copy - Copy - Copy.jpg
 
I am 21 years old, but every decision I have made in my life has been without guidance from someone older and more experienced. Looking back now, I feel that many of those decisions were foolish, and they have brought me to a point where I feel hopeless about my future.

Right now, I feel ashamed, guilty, useless, and insecure. I worry that I will never be able to get a decent job and that I will continue to burden my parents again and again. At a time when I should be taking care of them as they enter their sixties, the opposite is happening. I still cannot give them the comfortable and enjoyable life they deserve after all the hardships they have endured throughout their lives.

I feel so guilty that I sometimes think about ending my life. The poor decisions I made regarding my education weigh heavily on me. There are moments when I want everything to end, as if I convince myself that after death my soul would simply disappear and cease to exist.

Yet I am a Christian. Although I am not always faithful or obedient in my faith, I do believe in Christ. That is why I am confused about how I can think about death and imagine my soul disappearing when I also believe in heaven and hell.
Evita, you are still very young, your education is not finished, You could enrol in a program that you like that could generate give access to a good paying job once completed, there is still time, we all go through rough times but life is worth it, trust God ask him in prayer to guide you to the right path. I will pray to God for you.

when you pray do not forget to ask God the father in the name of His son Jesus, have faith that he will answer. You will see results if what you ask is reasonable. God never abandon his children and you are one of them.

Blessings and peace be with you.
 
  • Pray
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Oh yeah! I forgot about that.

Sorry. My bad.
My bad is infinitely worse than your simple moment of forgetfulness. I have already publicly apologized to the forum, and I have recently apologized directly to you, but I feel that I need to apologize here as well. In hindsight or now that I am thinking clearly, the "Christianity at its worst" comment that I made last light shamefully refers to me. I totally overreacted last night, and I feel horrible about it. If I could turn back time, then I would. I was the true offender here, and for that I truly apologize. It will never happen again.​
 
  • Heart
Reactions: GRACE_ambassador
I am 21 years old, but every decision I have made in my life has been without guidance from someone older and more experienced. Looking back now, I feel that many of those decisions were foolish, and they have brought me to a point where I feel hopeless about my future.

Right now, I feel ashamed, guilty, useless, and insecure. I worry that I will never be able to get a decent job and that I will continue to burden my parents again and again. At a time when I should be taking care of them as they enter their sixties, the opposite is happening. I still cannot give them the comfortable and enjoyable life they deserve after all the hardships they have endured throughout their lives.

I feel so guilty that I sometimes think about ending my life. The poor decisions I made regarding my education weigh heavily on me. There are moments when I want everything to end, as if I convince myself that after death my soul would simply disappear and cease to exist.

Yet I am a Christian. Although I am not always faithful or obedient in my faith, I do believe in Christ. That is why I am confused about how I can think about death and imagine my soul disappearing when I also believe in heaven and hell.
The devil is a liar, and there is no truth in him. If you have committed your life to Christ, grow by being baptised and praying to the Father. Look for a simple translation of the Bible and read the New Testament. Let the Spirit of grace overtake you by accepting Jesus's sacrifice for you and don't ever doubt again. For he accepted you. You're just being trialed in the desert, soon it will pass. Remember we are sanctified by faith.