Recovery from Infidelity online

[Ambassador]

So I messed up back to me, I want you to think on my dating apps. For the purposes of flirting, and chatting with other women not my wife. Please keep me in prayer, and any advice here and what I should do to possibly every gain back my marriage that I broke and destroyed through my own action.

 

[ForgiveMeGod]

So I messed up back to me, I want you to think on my dating apps. For the purposes of flirting, and chatting with other women not my wife. Please keep me in prayer, and any advice here and what I should do to possibly ever gain back my marriage that I broke and destroyed through my own action.

i‘ve never been married but something that help me build trust with others, is getting the covenant eyes app. It’s a Christian app, mostly for those who are addicted to porn but I think what you and your partner would benefit from, is the nonstop surveillance of your devices that comes with covenant eyes.

You would have to find a trusted guy friend to be your accountability partner that will be notified about your mobile phone behavior. You would want to find someone who would take this really seriously but not condemn you.

i’ve discovered that accountability is key to recover from lustful behavior. Having God hold you accountable is even better.

i would recommend deleting all social media accounts, don’t watch rated r movies, don’t listen to explicit music and delete all dating apps.

Sometimes the flesh gets out of control if we give into temptation and that is when it is time cut one eye out and toss it in the furnace, not literally but figuratively.

 

[ThereRoseaLamb]

So I messed up back to me, I want you to think on my dating apps. For the purposes of flirting, and chatting with other women not my wife. Please keep me in prayer, and any advice here and what I should do to possibly every gain back my marriage that I broke and destroyed through my own action.

110% accountability and transparency, mixed with a whole lot of prayer. Broken trust is not easy to get back. It's going to take a lot of work on your part. Wish you well.

 

[ThereRoseaLamb]

i‘ve never been married but something that help me build trust with others, is getting the covenant eyes app. It’s a Christian app, mostly for those who are addicted to porn but I think what you and your partner would benefit from, is the nonstop surveillance of your devices that comes with covenant eyes.

You would have to find a trusted guy friend to be your accountability partner that will be notified about your mobile phone behavior. You would want to find someone who would take this really seriously but not condemn you.

i’ve discovered that accountability is key to recover from lustful behavior. Having God hold you accountable is even better.

i would recommend deleting all social media accounts, don’t watch rated r movies, don’t listen to explicit music and delete all dating apps.

Sometimes the flesh gets out of control if we give into temptation and that is when it is time cut one eye out and toss it in the furnace, not literally but figuratively.

Yes, that is a good app and very good advice. Really though, rather than a friend, he needs to be accountable to her. He broke her trust and she should be the accountability parter.

 

[Dino246]

Yes, that is a good app and very good advice. Really though, rather than a friend, he needs to be accountable to her. He broke her trust and she should be the accountability parter.

I strongly disagree.

While trust is being restored, an unfaithful partner needs a godly confidant of the same gender. It is a burden to receive someone's confession and to hold them accountable, and the partner does not need the constant reminder of the sin. Demanding that of the "victim" borders on abusive. They need to heal, eventually forgive, and only when the offending partner is demonstrating appropriate change, restore the relationship.

 

[ForgiveMeGod]

Yes, that is a good app and very good advice. Really though, rather than a friend, he needs to be accountable to her. He broke her trust and she should be the accountability parter.

I disagree cause that makes it a one chance and you are done situation. Where as a friend, if he happens to screw up again, which it’s possible in recovery, he could give him a man to man talk. I have discovered that this sends a signal of loss of friendship, thus never wanting to look at or do those things again if he truly values the friendship.

Being caught by the wife is like throwing a plate of china on the ground and trying to glue it all together and then being caught again is like throwing the same china onto the ground, shattering it and hammering each piece into little pieces, and then trying to glue it all together again.

Also, I’ve never been married and I’m just going off of past experience in past relationships and the advice that the people who run covenant eyes recommend for a married couple.

 

[Tall_Timbers]

Delete most apps off of your phone. Don't have any social type apps left on there. Give your wife complete access and encourage her to check your phone whenever she pleases. She should have both any password/pin as well as biometric access.

 

[Lynx]

I struck the match
I burned the bridge
And I'm to blame for all of this
I lost your trust
When I drew my sword
This distance is my just reward
Can I undo the damage done?

Shaun Groves

 

[Lynx]

So I messed up back to me, I want you to think on my dating apps. For the purposes of flirting, and chatting with other women not my wife. Please keep me in prayer, and any advice here and what I should do to possibly every gain back my marriage that I broke and destroyed through my own action.

Wait a minute...

Weren't you one of the people lambasting folks over Halloween candy in the pagan holiday thread?

Well that supports that theory. It wasn't my theory, but it's interesting to see data supporting it.