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chelsers
Guest
I totally agree, studies have shown that pedophiles cannot be rehabilitated. I understand people saying that God can rehabilitate them, and I agree, but I still believe that they should be behind bars for the rest of their lives.
J
jsekins95
Guest
Obviously someone who sexually abuses children has a long way to go before he or she can earn anyone's trust back. From stories I've heard of sexual abuse at my school, most parents who do this never get rid of the urge. After years of commiting this sin, it's probably extremely difficult to eliminate it from their mind set. As for the victims, I think it depends on the kind of person they are. If they are strong willed and ask Christ for strength, he will see them through. Others, though, might give in, and become like their parents.
I
iki
Guest
well when i was young kid on a late night my brother started to take my undrwr an wanted to have sex or touch me like he new what he had to do. when he himself was just two years older than me. i remember not knowing anything about that nor boyfriends or girlfriends. i just new that i like a certain kid for hes actions,confidence or because he wasnt liked a lot for race or just been him. after that incedent my life was never the same. its like they were open to a new weird sadly n trange world. that even now i can imagen or understand how could someone not said anything or done something to protect us from doing this. how or where did my brother learn this or made him think this was ok.
i always said to myself now that im marry n have kids. my mom didnt know anything about GOD so for been a single parent had to work really hard n tired, my dad making her n our lives total difficult. cause he wasnt officially with my mom. he would come n go.hit my mom n just wanted to watch tv n b left alone in peace. used my mom when ever he wanted.she was to hurt to c what was going on. still i dont know what happen. until one night i saw what i wasnt supposed to. then realized part of what was going on came from their.
that continued to happen for years after a while i thought that was ok. since no one said or do anything.but a lot of peaple would always said to me that i had a very sad face even if i wasnt.then later it didnt happen just with him but with cousins, friends. we also thought other kids the same thing. was head was messt up. we just thought that playing mom n that was just the funniest thing ever. i didnt care. kids older than me would draw me just to touch me or kiss me. i my self started to learn n think that was ok. the was the way to show love. by giving it all way. without a price. even if that same kid would later ask me to get away from him. not to get near or look at him. so their parents woulnt know. i to think that i was the crazy one asking for more or things i wasnt supposed too.which in a way got me confused about guys, relationship, n what to expect or do .give it all n loose everything about dignity for whatever i thought i had left.
it came to me at a certain age that i said no more that i had to stop this.that something was wrong. n it happen her when i came to us. by 9-10 yrs.old.yeah i guess u could say how mess up i was.
i started noticing were i live that a lady new there was somthing wrong with us kids, my brother n me. she wouldnt let her kid play that much with us. but look at me different as she new there was something wrong about me n that i need it help but didnt know how to say it or do it. thats when i new something was wrong, something wasnt right. i guess because of the lady n friends seeing how i was rejected open my eyes at saying no more to my brother.he got furiously mad.
as kid he use to hit me a lot n call me names. it hurted becuse my relatives who were incharge of us while my mom been away to work or who came to this country before us saw how he treated me n didnt do anything. it gave him power over me.i sometimes try to defend my self but was unseccfull.i remeber my mom seen how my brother hit me didnt say nothing then i knew i was alone. many times i wonder if i was addopted or if she really love me. for not doing nothing. she didnt know how i felt in my heart what i had been through.
well it came to an age where everything stop completely.but the verbal d hiting didnt. for a momment it seem total peacefull. my brother n me were getting along. helping each otherout playing. like nothing ever happen.
until one day. my mother n us had to move from we where satying cause of the earhtquake, my dad officially left us here all alone with no relatives or money.nigthts before that my dad n mom got into a huge night. i remeber they were talking in the restroom. my mother was telling him things, like what i dont know.she had never cursed or yelled like crazy to my father or noone as i remeber.but the day i had these feeling that she was leaving us instead of my dad. i didnt want to sleep. all i wanted to do is pay attentiion to her every move. cause i was scared of what she would do. thgats when i realize in my little head n age. she was always there for us. she would never leave us. but that night, was not the night.i remeber waking up not knowing if she was there or not. not knowing what to do. scream that i wanted my mom or that iwanted out o f this family or my dad.
when my dad left we took him to the airport i didnt cry or worry that i wasnt going to c him . i guess i thought he will be back like other times.but he never did.
my moms life change totally me well i thought like other days normall.that we would continue living like this until we get old.n help my mom like we were thought in our country since we were little.
but it didnt happen like that. my mom became more angrier. didnt want us to tell her how our day was. just to help clean, cook(on whatever we could, eat n go to sleep)now all the time yelling n screaming.that i remeber one time i told her that my brotheer had hit me.when i knew sothing that told me to wait until she had a good deep breath for comming from work. but i didnt listen. she got mad for at me for always complaining that this happen to me during the day n not been ably to tolarated or handle it. the day when she daid that.i felt rejected n weak. i remeber i said to my self i would never tell her what was wrong with me ever again. until this day i had always been scared to talk to her for almost anything. n when i do im still not happy for saying it to her or anyone. even writing it now.
but is true if GOD doesnt really change you u cant really said uve change n stop doing what u just to do.
life has always been scary everything that i do dont know most of the time if im doing ti right or wrong. but always in a constant worry.if this yes or no.
i always said to myself now that im marry n have kids. my mom didnt know anything about GOD so for been a single parent had to work really hard n tired, my dad making her n our lives total difficult. cause he wasnt officially with my mom. he would come n go.hit my mom n just wanted to watch tv n b left alone in peace. used my mom when ever he wanted.she was to hurt to c what was going on. still i dont know what happen. until one night i saw what i wasnt supposed to. then realized part of what was going on came from their.
that continued to happen for years after a while i thought that was ok. since no one said or do anything.but a lot of peaple would always said to me that i had a very sad face even if i wasnt.then later it didnt happen just with him but with cousins, friends. we also thought other kids the same thing. was head was messt up. we just thought that playing mom n that was just the funniest thing ever. i didnt care. kids older than me would draw me just to touch me or kiss me. i my self started to learn n think that was ok. the was the way to show love. by giving it all way. without a price. even if that same kid would later ask me to get away from him. not to get near or look at him. so their parents woulnt know. i to think that i was the crazy one asking for more or things i wasnt supposed too.which in a way got me confused about guys, relationship, n what to expect or do .give it all n loose everything about dignity for whatever i thought i had left.
it came to me at a certain age that i said no more that i had to stop this.that something was wrong. n it happen her when i came to us. by 9-10 yrs.old.yeah i guess u could say how mess up i was.
i started noticing were i live that a lady new there was somthing wrong with us kids, my brother n me. she wouldnt let her kid play that much with us. but look at me different as she new there was something wrong about me n that i need it help but didnt know how to say it or do it. thats when i new something was wrong, something wasnt right. i guess because of the lady n friends seeing how i was rejected open my eyes at saying no more to my brother.he got furiously mad.
as kid he use to hit me a lot n call me names. it hurted becuse my relatives who were incharge of us while my mom been away to work or who came to this country before us saw how he treated me n didnt do anything. it gave him power over me.i sometimes try to defend my self but was unseccfull.i remeber my mom seen how my brother hit me didnt say nothing then i knew i was alone. many times i wonder if i was addopted or if she really love me. for not doing nothing. she didnt know how i felt in my heart what i had been through.
well it came to an age where everything stop completely.but the verbal d hiting didnt. for a momment it seem total peacefull. my brother n me were getting along. helping each otherout playing. like nothing ever happen.
until one day. my mother n us had to move from we where satying cause of the earhtquake, my dad officially left us here all alone with no relatives or money.nigthts before that my dad n mom got into a huge night. i remeber they were talking in the restroom. my mother was telling him things, like what i dont know.she had never cursed or yelled like crazy to my father or noone as i remeber.but the day i had these feeling that she was leaving us instead of my dad. i didnt want to sleep. all i wanted to do is pay attentiion to her every move. cause i was scared of what she would do. thgats when i realize in my little head n age. she was always there for us. she would never leave us. but that night, was not the night.i remeber waking up not knowing if she was there or not. not knowing what to do. scream that i wanted my mom or that iwanted out o f this family or my dad.
when my dad left we took him to the airport i didnt cry or worry that i wasnt going to c him . i guess i thought he will be back like other times.but he never did.
my moms life change totally me well i thought like other days normall.that we would continue living like this until we get old.n help my mom like we were thought in our country since we were little.
but it didnt happen like that. my mom became more angrier. didnt want us to tell her how our day was. just to help clean, cook(on whatever we could, eat n go to sleep)now all the time yelling n screaming.that i remeber one time i told her that my brotheer had hit me.when i knew sothing that told me to wait until she had a good deep breath for comming from work. but i didnt listen. she got mad for at me for always complaining that this happen to me during the day n not been ably to tolarated or handle it. the day when she daid that.i felt rejected n weak. i remeber i said to my self i would never tell her what was wrong with me ever again. until this day i had always been scared to talk to her for almost anything. n when i do im still not happy for saying it to her or anyone. even writing it now.
but is true if GOD doesnt really change you u cant really said uve change n stop doing what u just to do.
life has always been scary everything that i do dont know most of the time if im doing ti right or wrong. but always in a constant worry.if this yes or no.
C
collective
Guest
Not a lot of people do turn out to be molesterers of children, i was molested from the age of 6 till about 11, (at the moment i have started police proceeding), My husband was a chid of a prostite who sold him into prositution at a young age and we are not molestorers but i, like alot of people do may hate changing nappies or dealing with anything in that way that is inoccent out of the fear of hurting a child, it stays with you and that is also the scars that i carry, yes i believe that God can renew and comfort a victim or transform person after a molesterer has done his acts by trust christ as his/her savior and repenting but sorry to say there are christians who molest children, i have known of 3 so far who had a role or where high up in the church who were found to be child molestorers and one of them that i know went to jail,Praise God,, what im saying is that being christian does not exempt you from acting out on sexual molestation of any type or any other evil that mortifies the human race,
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sweet_eyes
Guest
I sometime don't like being around kids cuz I'm afraid that I might one day get that urge, and I fight my thoughts, I get bad thoughts which freaks me out. U would never want to hurt someone that way. I kmow how it messed me up.
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collective
Guest
sweet eyes i wouldnt stop being around children because of what you fight on the inside, its God showing you the unhealed part that need to be identified and faced, i have to change nappies every day because i have children and it feels terrible i know and all sorts of scary thought run through my mind, but i know im not like the one who molested me,and you owe it to yourself to prove you are not the same by trusting yourself around children this is also a thorn in the sideso God can get the Glory that paul was talking about in corinthians .
Corinthians-2 12:9 And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.
Corinthians-2 12:10 Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ's sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong.
Corinthians-2 12:9 And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.
Corinthians-2 12:10 Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ's sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong.
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luke15chick
Guest
if anyone is interested i could dish a little on the professional level, not pro child molestor, but i am a social worker and have worked with this before.
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sweet_eyes
Guest
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carpetmanswife
Guest
thats a hard one , i can tell you this, i became caretaker so to speak to the person who violated me when he became sick.....it was something i just had to do , many times i would remember *they call it flashbacks* of incidents that had happened, i would literally shake my head to try and get the thoughts out of my mind....get over it? ...i dont know thats completely possible without God just intervening.i forgave him , i had to i wouldnt have been able to care for him had i not..but getting over it...man, i guess i never have and thats been MANY yrs ago..coz we just cant forget...ya know?
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sweet_eyes
Guest
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Reborn32
Guest
I can surely feel what yall are saying. I work at aprison and child molestors alwats return for the same thing. Molesting again! I was molested too and I never told anyone until last year but I have never or would never harm a child. I'm a little over protective of kids.
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carpetmanswife
Guest
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Lifelike
Guest
Yes they can stop. Jesus makes the difference, but it can take A LOT of transformation and usually deliverance. But if someone is known to have these issues there obviously needs to be safeguards in place so that they are not tempted. Even impulses have foundations and roots. Jesus Christ can deliver to the UTTERMOST. There is a pattern of abusers abusing, and it is a complex subject, it doesnt always happen that way but it is common because abuse messes with a persons identity. And the abused person will require restoration and usually needs to undergo councilling so they can get help coming out of their experience and finding freedom. I would love to comment in much more detail on this subject but dont have the time, but will drop back some time to attack it more extensively!
God bless.
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Ugly
Guest
This thread is from 2009. Nearly everyone who posted in it is no longer a member of the site. Including the OP.
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hope36523
Guest
As a recovering abused person,I have been abused and never had the erge to molest a kid,i am overly protective,i will admidt with christ any adict can stop,i think a child molester needs to take there punishment admidt there wrng,get right with god
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Mammachickadee
Guest
My husband was sexually abused by two uncles repeatedly as a child, and the abuse actually caused him to be LESS interested in sex in part. This is the more common psychological response as opposed to adopting the pattern of abuse themselves. No doubt a young person who has been abused but never reaches an understanding of how unnatural molestation is might retain a desire for the act themselves, but most people who were abused in the past move on enough to start adult relationships. The level of intimacy with their significant other and their views on sex, however, will usually be adulterated.Oh yah I certainly wouldn't hire a born again former child molestor to babysit my kids
But I have to say that anyone can be changed by God, if they're truly born again.
My great uncle tried to molest me when I was around 12 years old, when he was apparently in a very drunken state. Thank God he didn't succeed. (If he did, who knows what direction my life would have taken! I might have grown up being gay!!!) But anyway I saw him many years later, after I was already an adult, and born again. And he was talking all about the Lord, as if he was really saved. He seemed to be sincere. So I just gave him the benefit of the doubt. (Still wouldn't leave my kids with him though; better safe than sorry!!!)
