Should I kill myself and just hope for the best?

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Cory85

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May 4, 2026
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Should I kill myself and just hope for the best? Or? Why am I alive? Why was I born stupid and evil and broken and helpless and unloved and why won't any of the basic Christian platitudes of God fixing this awful murderous hell someday actually comfort me, here, in hell, waiting for something to kill me, and no point purpose or hope to continuing to exist but still scared to die?
 
Should I kill myself and just hope for the best? Or? Why am I alive? Why was I born stupid and evil and broken and helpless and unloved and why won't any of the basic Christian platitudes of God fixing this awful murderous hell someday actually comfort me, here, in hell, waiting for something to kill me, and no point purpose or hope to continuing to exist but still scared to die?
I'd like to say something that might help. What can I say that you won't interpret as a Christian platitude? Tell me how I can help.
 
Should I kill myself and just hope for the best? Or? Why am I alive? Why was I born stupid and evil and broken and helpless and unloved and why won't any of the basic Christian platitudes of God fixing this awful murderous hell someday actually comfort me, here, in hell, waiting for something to kill me, and no point purpose or hope to continuing to exist but still scared to die?



Hello,

Sorry to hear that you are going through this tough time in life.
Be aware that just like the other times, you will get past it and things will eventually improve. That doesn't seem like a possibility right now, but it's true. I don't know what torments you, but the Lord does. He will help which is why you have reached out to believers here .

Suicide is Never a solution.
It is a one way permanent trip to Hell. That's why Satan leads people to commit suicide, like Judas Iscariot. Judas killed himself 2,000 years ago and is still suffering greater than you are now. That will never change for him. If that is scary, it should be. Jesus warns us about that over and over again, where the worms are and fire is not quenched. He told us about a man that begs for water and can't get any. That's not Jesus will for him, but it's too late for that man.
No friend, suicide doesn't take away the suffering at all.
I'll tell you what does.

Before you do anything else you need to listen to this good news. It's a short explanation about how to be saved and the way to Heaven according to God's Word.
>Good News<

God loves you and wants to save you right now. He sent you here because he knows what you are going through and what you need. Please pray with the preacher at the end of the video.
I'd be happy to pray for you too.
 
Should I kill myself and just hope for the best? Or? Why am I alive? Why was I born stupid and evil and broken and helpless and unloved and why won't any of the basic Christian platitudes of God fixing this awful murderous hell someday actually comfort me, here, in hell, waiting for something to kill me, and no point purpose or hope to continuing to exist but still scared to die?
 
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:unsure:
'Undoubtably there is an underlying issue that has not been clarified.
Whatever the "source" and/or reason that has brought about this kind of unstable thinking
needs to be attended to. "Belittling" one's self is most harmful to self, and can lead to a
miserable existence when the problem is knowingly left unattended.

Be thankful you are able to "vent" your insecurities here. There are those that don't even
have the capabilities to do that. Ponder that when you feel like "beating yourself up".
Some may not have an audience to hear their "woes".

I will leave God out of this narrative as you seem "distraught with God".
I learned years ago, my problems arose from just that, being without God!
 
Should I kill myself and just hope for the best? Or? Why am I alive? Why was I born stupid and evil and broken and helpless and unloved and why won't any of the basic Christian platitudes of God fixing this awful murderous hell someday actually comfort me, here, in hell, waiting for something to kill me, and no point purpose or hope to continuing to exist but still scared to die?
What we do is a product of what we believe about where we came from. I'd say you need to fix your false beliefs, but beware it is a vicious circle.

Romans 1:21-27 Because that, when they knew God, they glorified him not as God, neither were thankful; but became vain in their imaginations, and their foolish heart was darkened.
22 Professing themselves to be wise, they became fools,
23 And changed the glory of the uncorruptible God into an image made like to corruptible man, and to birds, and fourfooted beasts, and creeping things.
24 Wherefore God also gave them up to uncleanness through the lusts of their own hearts, to dishonour their own bodies between themselves:
25 Who changed the truth of God into a lie, and worshipped and served the creature more than the Creator, who is blessed for ever. Amen.
26 For this cause God gave them up unto vile affections: for even their women did change the natural use into that which is against nature:
27 And likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust one toward another; men with men working that which is unseemly, and receiving in themselves that recompence of their error which was meet.
28 And even as they did not like to retain God in their knowledge, God gave them over to a reprobate mind, to do those things which are not convenient;
29 Being filled with all unrighteousness, fornication, wickedness, covetousness, maliciousness; full of envy, murder, debate, deceit, malignity; whisperers,
30 Backbiters, haters of God, despiteful, proud, boasters, inventors of evil things, disobedient to parents,
31 Without understanding, covenantbreakers, without natural affection, implacable, unmerciful:
32 Who knowing the judgment of God, that they which commit such things are worthy of death, not only do the same, but have pleasure in them that do them.
 
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I'm sorry to hear you're struggling so much. I was at a very low point in my life with literally no one around me who cared and going through the worst spiritual warfare of my life while the people who claimed to love me thought I was just crazy. Let me tell you how God pulled me up out of that pit. I sought Him. With every fiber of my being, I prayed and read scripture, I studied to learn what he said, I pushed through in learning to hear His voice despite the enemy trying to mimic it. I kept at it because my determination to not let the enemy get in my head to coerce me into suicide was not going to win. And what did God do? He gave me dreams, he gave me visions, he talked to me and proved to me who was talking through circumstances and outcomes. He even sent me love songs because he knew that meant a lot. I wrote a poem about how I yearned for someone... anyone... to just rescue me, but the flame in my soul was almost out and on it's last leg until someone came and rescued me. I called it "My Hero". Not a minute passed where God told me to open up YouTube and select the VERY FIRST option on my suggested page and listen to it. I wrote that poem offline... I haven't listened to a love song in over 20 years. That song called "I'll be your Hero" had NO business being there. But there it was....

God can do the same for you that he did for me. Seek him with everything you have and I promise you it WILL get better. He will bring you to amazing places and heal you from the inside out. And the most healing occurs when you didn't even realize it was happening... just little things over time.

I'm praying for you, but honestly, what do you have to lose?
 
Should I kill myself and just hope for the best? Or? Why am I alive? Why was I born stupid and evil and broken and helpless and unloved and why won't any of the basic Christian platitudes of God fixing this awful murderous hell someday actually comfort me, here, in hell, waiting for something to kill me, and no point purpose or hope to continuing to exist but still scared to die?
My brother was really in to going to Church and the Christian lifestyle.

But he started dabbling in sin especially pornography.

And said he could not feel the Spirit anymore and was mad at God.

And complaining why does he have to go through things on this earth.

But it was his own fault for disconnecting himself because of sin.

Then he got married involved in swinging swapping mates adding to it.

And started going to a Church that accepted gay people as being alright his wife's mom being a lesbian.

With a different viewpoint of the Bible which was probably everyone is saved so no problems.

But it seems he did not really believe that after a while for he committed suicide which someone said he left a message online that he was no good and ashamed.

He handled it wrong for suicide is still murder.

Romans 8:35 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword?

Romans 8:36 As it is written, For thy sake we are killed all the day long; we are accounted as sheep for the slaughter.

Romans 8:38 For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come,

Romans 8:39 Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

People should stop crying babying and suck it up for it is not always a bed of roses.

But our sins cause us to be miserable so we should not blame God or the world sucks.

With some people being mad that they cannot enjoy sin in their Christian walk and think it is strict

But God said His commandments are not grievous.

God said they are murmurers and complainers walking after their own lusts.

They do not have love which is what it means which creation testifies of a higher power and testifies of the 2 greatest laws love God and love people.

Not everybody wants to get rid of the fleshy ways whether they claim God or not.

God gives peace, joy, comfort, power, love, and a sound mind.

But they want to complain and then wonder why they are miserable and why things suck all the while it is their fault.
 
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Why was I born stupid and evil and broken and helpless and unloved and why won't any of the basic Christian platitudes of God fixing this awful murderous hell someday actually comfort me, here, in hell, waiting for something to kill me, and no point purpose or hope to continuing to exist but still scared to die?
Hi, Cory.

Over a month ago, I asked you this in a DM:​
Have rejection and condemnation from others been a regular part of your past? I ask because they were a very real part of my past, and that used to be a barrier that prevented me from receiving God's love.
Here was your answer:​
Yes, I have lived my entire life under threat of rejection. I don't care whether God forgives me or not, either, I have to find a way to live in this hell where rejection and death are constant threats, or just curl up and die. I have survived on delusions thus far and they all disappeared.
Cory, I am sorry that things like rejection, condemnation, and death have been constant threats in your life, but you need to know that none of those things are what God desires for you. Cory, in Christ, God has graciously made a way for you to be accepted in the beloved, Ephesians 1:6, and free from condemnation, Romans 8:1, while also having the very real hope of eternal life, Titus 1:2; 3:7.

On your "Something to do before I die" thread, you said:​
the myth of individual salvation is rationally errant on at least two levels, those being: 1. God, being the only creator of anything, for him to punish himself through his creation or something so stupid as to defy the only goodness in all of creation is just insane
Cory, you are not the first person to find God's plan of salvation to be "insane" or foolish. This is what Paul said while writing to the saints at Corinth:​

1 Corinthians 1:18-25​

18 For the preaching of the cross is to them that perish foolishness; but unto us which are saved it is the power of God.
19 For it is written, I will destroy the wisdom of the wise, and will bring to nothing the understanding of the prudent.
20 Where is the wise? where is the scribe? where is the disputer of this world? hath not God made foolish the wisdom of this world?
21 For after that in the wisdom of God the world by wisdom knew not God, it pleased God by the foolishness of preaching to save them that believe.
22 For the Jews require a sign, and the Greeks seek after wisdom:
23 But we preach Christ crucified, unto the Jews a stumblingblock, and unto the Greeks foolishness;
24 But unto them which are called, both Jews and Greeks, Christ the power of God, and the wisdom of God.
25 Because the foolishness of God is wiser than men; and the weakness of God is stronger than men.

Through the lens of worldly wisdom, which is foolishness with God, the preaching of the cross seems foolish. However, to us who are saved, it is the power of God. Cory, what you called "insane" is perfectly sane. The only way that God, who is just, could forgive and redeem fallen mankind was to find a sinless substitute who would die in man's place. In his great love for you, Jesus willingly became that man. Cory, on the cross, Jesus bore the punishment for your sins. He later defeated death through his resurrection from the dead. If you place your saving faith in what Jesus did on your behalf, then you can find peace with God and rest for your soul. That may sound overly simplistic, but it is the truth.​

Romans 10:9-11​

9 That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved.
10 For with the heart man believeth unto righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation.
11 For the scripture saith, Whosoever believeth on him shall not be ashamed.

By the way, you are not stupid. In fact, I had to look up the word "platitude" to see what it meant. I am praying for you, Cory.
 
I'm sorry to hear you're struggling so much. I was at a very low point in my life with literally no one around me who cared and going through the worst spiritual warfare of my life while the people who claimed to love me thought I was just crazy. Let me tell you how God pulled me up out of that pit. I sought Him. With every fiber of my being, I prayed and read scripture, I studied to learn what he said, I pushed through in learning to hear His voice despite the enemy trying to mimic it. I kept at it because my determination to not let the enemy get in my head to coerce me into suicide was not going to win. And what did God do? He gave me dreams, he gave me visions, he talked to me and proved to me who was talking through circumstances and outcomes. He even sent me love songs because he knew that meant a lot. I wrote a poem about how I yearned for someone... anyone... to just rescue me, but the flame in my soul was almost out and on it's last leg until someone came and rescued me. I called it "My Hero". Not a minute passed where God told me to open up YouTube and select the VERY FIRST option on my suggested page and listen to it. I wrote that poem offline... I haven't listened to a love song in over 20 years. That song called "I'll be your Hero" had NO business being there. But there it was....

God can do the same for you that he did for me. Seek him with everything you have and I promise you it WILL get better. He will bring you to amazing places and heal you from the inside out. And the most healing occurs when you didn't even realize it was happening... just little things over time.

I'm praying for you, but honestly, what do you have to lose?

Thank you for being you, and for sharing your testimony.
Many "Christians" seem incapable of realizing the power of personal testimony
of how God changed their lives. One must wonder about the "Christian" movement of today.
Pages of the Divine readings merely signify the ability to read and it appears to end there.
Again, thank you for sharing. (
Amen )
thMYACKUK4 - Copy.jpg (y)
 
Should I kill myself and just hope for the best? Or? Why am I alive? Why was I born stupid and evil and broken and helpless and unloved and why won't any of the basic Christian platitudes of God fixing this awful murderous hell someday actually comfort me, here, in hell, waiting for something to kill me, and no point purpose or hope to continuing to exist but still scared to die?
Hello , I am also stupid , evil , broken and helpless . U r talking about the vast majority of human beings . No , I'm not kidding . We r all in a pitiful state and living in an horrible world , not the actual planet but , the societies that we have constructed for ourselves . Viscous , cold , dark , miserable kingdoms of death . The only light comes from Christ and what he accomplished , he loved , God and us and he still does . God does not want us to live as we do in these horrible kingdoms surrounded by pointless , horrible , banal and stagnant , cruelty filled societies that can offer nothing but pain and misery and death . God wants us , God wants u , to b with Him in another world . A world so different from this one it's beyond our puny imaginations . A clean world , no pollution of any kind what so ever . Clean rivers and oceans and air and soil . A world where animals do not hunt and kill each other , no bloodshed . A world where people r not allowed to murder , rape steal or oppress each other . However , we cannot send ourselves to this world , we have to enter it in God's good time , when He knows the time is right for us . Until then , we endure , keeping His Kingdom in our sights and knowing that we r never alone or unloved , just the complete opposite in fact .
 
I'm sorry to hear you're struggling so much. I was at a very low point in my life with literally no one around me who cared and going through the worst spiritual warfare of my life while the people who claimed to love me thought I was just crazy. Let me tell you how God pulled me up out of that pit. I sought Him. With every fiber of my being, I prayed and read scripture, I studied to learn what he said, I pushed through in learning to hear His voice despite the enemy trying to mimic it. I kept at it because my determination to not let the enemy get in my head to coerce me into suicide was not going to win. And what did God do? He gave me dreams, he gave me visions, he talked to me and proved to me who was talking through circumstances and outcomes. He even sent me love songs because he knew that meant a lot. I wrote a poem about how I yearned for someone... anyone... to just rescue me, but the flame in my soul was almost out and on it's last leg until someone came and rescued me. I called it "My Hero". Not a minute passed where God told me to open up YouTube and select the VERY FIRST option on my suggested page and listen to it. I wrote that poem offline... I haven't listened to a love song in over 20 years. That song called "I'll be your Hero" had NO business being there. But there it was....

God can do the same for you that he did for me. Seek him with everything you have and I promise you it WILL get better. He will bring you to amazing places and heal you from the inside out. And the most healing occurs when you didn't even realize it was happening... just little things over time.

I'm praying for you, but honestly, what do you have to lose?
I have nothing left to lose except my broken sick sad body that I'm ready to leave anyway
 
Perhaps you could elaborate why you feel so distraught.
I don't know how anyone feels anything but distraught but my main problems are constant chronic pain, having no point or purpose except to suffer until it kills me, and I have no money or any goals to chase to keep me distracted from the utter disappointment of existing
 
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I don't know how anyone feels anything but distraught but my main problems are constant chronic pain, having no point or purpose except to suffer until it kills me, and I have no money or any goals to chase to keep me distracted from the utter disappointment of existing
Pain, such as?
 
Hello , I am also stupid , evil , broken and helpless . U r talking about the vast majority of human beings . No , I'm not kidding . We r all in a pitiful state and living in an horrible world , not the actual planet but , the societies that we have constructed for ourselves . Viscous , cold , dark , miserable kingdoms of death . The only light comes from Christ and what he accomplished , he loved , God and us and he still does . God does not want us to live as we do in these horrible kingdoms surrounded by pointless , horrible , banal and stagnant , cruelty filled societies that can offer nothing but pain and misery and death . God wants us , God wants u , to b with Him in another world . A world so different from this one it's beyond our puny imaginations . A clean world , no pollution of any kind what so ever . Clean rivers and oceans and air and soil . A world where animals do not hunt and kill each other , no bloodshed . A world where people r not allowed to murder , rape steal or oppress each other . However , we cannot send ourselves to this world , we have to enter it in God's good time , when He knows the time is right for us . Until then , we endure , keeping His Kingdom in our sights and knowing that we r never alone or unloved , just the complete opposite in fact .
I don't know that nor feel it. I do believe in a creator but I do not think he loves anything or he would make the nightmare stop or never allowed it to start
Pain, such as?
I am not sure what you're asking. All my joints hurt and my skeleton. is twisted