Jordache i understand where you are. I am there and actually had same problem as a child. In fact i had to take Ferinsol as a kid. Not sure if i spelled it correctly sorry. Anyways it was a spoonful of striaght iron every morning as i was so anemic from a baby to a child that i did not gain wieght and i also had sezuires do to high fevers. The two symptoms did not mix well and this continued for years. I can still taste the stuff today and it was terrible. The Ferinsol lasted until i was in my early teens.
Now i have so many health problems too many to list and many i wont go into... but here are ones that are connected to your story and that you might understan as they effect me now...My Blood pressure has been all over the place, from so high i was hospitalized and almost died 203/202 to so low they couldnt find it and I nearly passed out. I will always be on meds for the rest of my life...
Even on medication and while things remained well with my BP i had a cerabella stroke in 2005, and due to it i now have head aches that never leave me as they are there 24/7 day and night. This effected my right side and ability to focus, memory loss, eye problems and balance issues. I am on so many medisons (over 17 per day) just to keep me going. I also had a severe car accident in Jan 17th of last year that has caused many problems with my lower back. One of the biggest the specialists are worrying about is the partical sacrilization of the L5/6 witch is actually in layman terms a fractured back so now i am awaiting surgery as i have nerve damage and my legs and feet get numb and they burn many times.
With the accident, it has casued so many dizzy spells to occurr now do to the meds i was on before dont work for some reason and we have to basically start all over again.. I have from 10-20 per day which causes me to fall and the sezure like symptoms occurr every other day now. I have been told i am not to be alone now as I am to have a caregiver with me at all times. I have theraphy and an occupational therapist comming to my home every 2 weeks to make sure i have updated with everything and chech on my updates and see if i am doing ok. My husband cares for me in the meantime and i thank God for him dearly...
But what i want to really let you know is, that through all of this,, i feel your frustration and i understand how you feel. I sympathise with you and know you are in a place that you dont want to be in and dont know why.. Its scary and you feel like running away, but their is no where to run to that you know of.. But I want to tell you there is... God is that place.. At least He was and is for me...
I have learned that even though I have all of these things going on, I still have joy! I do not let worry and the pain of discontent flood me. I praise Him every day as He is worthy! This is what it means to trust in God.. I have been on deaths doorsteps literally. When you get to that point,, you realize, how to really trust God or not.. It doesnt mean we still dont get mad at the stuff going on in our lives, but we can know that that our feelings wont lead us to a point of crossing a line of disbelief thinking God is not with you. He is!!! (Not saying your here)
Never think God does not love nor care for you when you are going through things.. Its during these times, we learn to trust Him more and only then can we have the faith to let Him carry us when we cant walk upright ourselves.... This is true trust! Remember the one who does the carrying, also does the leading too.. This is the greatest thing... For then we really know we are on the right path... God will never lead you astray...
Stay encouraged, and keep praising Him even in these terrible times, for God is still God regardless of our struggles... Thank you for allowing me to share, and I will keep you in my prayers... You are never alone! You may feel lonely and scared at times, but you are NEVER alone!!! God is with you my dear....
Dotann