Surviving Church as a Single

  • Thread starter Thread starter MusicalMe
  • Start date Start date
  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
This is why I hate it when people complain about how hard it is to be a Christian in America... why? Because someone might make fun of you? There are places in the world where you can literally die for being a Christian. We have it sooo easy in America...
 
ohh i know! i dont care if people make fun of me and call me names for being a christian..... Its not half as bad as being tortured or jailed or killed for being one!
 
MusicalMe said:
This is why I hate it when people complain about how hard it is to be a Christian in America... why? Because someone might make fun of you? There are places in the world where you can literally die for being a Christian. We have it sooo easy in America...
Click to expand...

So true!

Matthew 10:33 But whoever disowns me before men, I will disown him before my Father in heaven.

I love that verse.
 
my youth pastor used to guilt trip us using that verse if we didnt come to the alter when he had an alter call lol
 
That video was very funny. It reflected exactly how I have been feeling at my current church. I am a 29 year old single male and everybody else at my church is 45 and older and all seem to be married with kids. I really enjoy it there but it is hard to talk to people who have very different things going on in their lives than my own life. I have been debating looking for a new church but I hate that feeling I get just like the video showed of entering a new church. Thanks for the video, it made me laugh.
 
I'll never forget one Sunday when some members asked me to sit with them at a fellowship lunch and then proceeded to talk to each other about what their grandkids were up to. I don't think I spoke for the entire meal.
 
The church keeps saying to pray and it will workout,but how long do I have to pray? I don't think they realize how lonely it gets!and when I talk about trying to fing someone to share my path, they do not agree and say I should wait longer, but I Am getting tired of waiting,and want to spend the rest of my life with someone who knows the Lord!
 
Drum--I was just wondering, what kinds of things do you do to go out and meet people? I'm finding that's my problem--I'm home way too much and often not exactly out on the social scene. I've done a little bit of looking on the web as far as Christian singles sights and even trips--I've participated in a few dating sites but nothing significant happened... for myself, I have some things I'm trying to get straightened out in my life right now but I told God that if it's His will, I'm going to try to devote next year to being more social and attending more conferences, church events, and trips, as I can afford it. I also plan to try a few new dating sites and attend a Christian singles trip if it all pans out. Just a few thoughts! I know part of our search is getting out there and meeting people... God bless you in your search.
 
Hello,
For what it's worth.... I like this quote:
If you want to know where a man is spiritually>>>>>LOOK AT HIS WIFE!!

That sums it up pretty well, huh?????
 
OK Im no longer single but I read because I wanted to learn what not to do. smiles, I woud like to share a story from when I was young. Many wanted to see me (fixed up) at my church. I was quick to dodge their efforts as , well you understand why. One sunday I was cornered by one of members as he was determined to fix me up with his son. Thank goodness my mom was near by, she quikly said we were running late . Apoligized and away we went. I asked her why she did this and she said, Im all for you meeting a nice young man but his uncle is a well known mobster. So thanks to my mom I avoided the mafioso. Thanks mom! God bless, pickles
 
pickles said:
OK Im no longer single but I read because I wanted to learn what not to do. smiles, I woud like to share a story from when I was young. Many wanted to see me (fixed up) at my church. I was quick to dodge their efforts as , well you understand why. One sunday I was cornered by one of members as he was determined to fix me up with his son. Thank goodness my mom was near by, she quikly said we were running late . Apoligized and away we went. I asked her why she did this and she said, Im all for you meeting a nice young man but his uncle is a well known mobster. So thanks to my mom I avoided the mafioso. Thanks mom! God bless, pickles
Click to expand...

Whoa... there's family... and then there's "the" family... glad your Mom was there to rescue you, Pickles!! As much as I'd like to find someone... I can do without those kinds of family ties.
 
ummmm errrr.....lately.....I have found my enthusiasm for Church wane......

Im an 'old' single and currently there is a massive baby boom amongst everyone within 10 yrs of my age at my Church. There are 3, yes 3, single people in my church.

So...all I get to listen to is baby conversations from any of my friends....all of whom I feel quite isolated from since commonality seems to be disappearing cos our lifespaces are sooo radically different!

I admit feverishly, that I have taken a few weeks away from Church..... when I go yet another person is engaged, had a baby or pregnant it does make me feel a bit lonely. I know its not a good reason to stay away.... and I will be back next week....I guess its just an area I have to lay down at the feet of Jesus and trust him in. He is the man with the plan and even though at this very moment there are many people in my Church praying that I will find a nice man..... yes, they have told me this..... with their pitying puppy dog eyes....

I have to move past the fact that my singleness is sadly magnified at my Church and all the well meaning people who say - aww but your such a lovely girl.....are not trying to rub salt in my wounds.....LOL. Its such a weird stage of life....so weird to not fit the 'norm'

I guess it helps me to understand others who dont fit social norms....what is normal anyway???

Ok, enough of my tired ranting.....goodnight....thanx for reading my musings! God bless~
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: seoulsearch
I FEEL THE SAME WAY. I AM SINGLE AND MY PASTOR TOLD ME THAT HE ISNT GOING TO START A SINGLES CLASS. I DONT THINK ITS FAIR WE SHOULD FEEL COMFORTABLE AT OUR DESIRED CHURCH AND HAVE MEETINGS WE CAN ENJOY AS WELL.
 
Haha. I understand how you feel. In most churches people who are married look at singles as a project. "Oh look at that poor single girl/guy. Let's get them married!" People will come up to you and remind you that God has someone special for you. Just be patient and wait. I've had friends try and set me up with guys they thought might be perfect for me. I've had people come up to me and tell me about their sons. Oh and then don't be single and over the age of 25, you will get people coming up to you and reminding you that it's ok if you're getting older and still single, God STILL has someone for you. Lol. Back then I would just laugh and take it humorously.
 
J0Y said:
ummmm errrr.....lately.....I have found my enthusiasm for Church wane......

Im an 'old' single and currently there is a massive baby boom amongst everyone within 10 yrs of my age at my Church. There are 3, yes 3, single people in my church.

So...all I get to listen to is baby conversations from any of my friends....all of whom I feel quite isolated from since commonality seems to be disappearing cos our lifespaces are sooo radically different!

I admit feverishly, that I have taken a few weeks away from Church..... when I go yet another person is engaged, had a baby or pregnant it does make me feel a bit lonely. I know its not a good reason to stay away.... and I will be back next week....I guess its just an area I have to lay down at the feet of Jesus and trust him in. He is the man with the plan and even though at this very moment there are many people in my Church praying that I will find a nice man..... yes, they have told me this..... with their pitying puppy dog eyes....

I have to move past the fact that my singleness is sadly magnified at my Church and all the well meaning people who say - aww but your such a lovely girl.....are not trying to rub salt in my wounds.....LOL. Its such a weird stage of life....so weird to not fit the 'norm'

I guess it helps me to understand others who dont fit social norms....what is normal anyway???

Ok, enough of my tired ranting.....goodnight....thanx for reading my musings! God bless~
Click to expand...

I completely understand what you're saying, Joy. It's made me not just frustrated with church in general, but also God... because I find it's hard to witness to others about Him and why they would want to get to know Him as their personal Savior when I'm struggling so hard myself to keep believing He's not constantly overlooking me...

I wish all of us singles lived closer to each other--I think if we all got together we'd rock the house. :)
 
[/quote] JOY: [I am sick of feeling like I dont fit at church. At the moment ESPECIALLY. There is a baby boom going on in my church. I hate it. ALL the women anywhere near my age are on their 1,2nd or 3rd kid now. They all sit in the 'family' corner of the church. I on the other hand dont know where to sit. All the singles are in their late teens - early 20s....I am past that.... All the older people gravitate to couples, I mean, how often do people invite singles to lunch?? Most couples ask COUPLES. Last week I went over to chat with 2 good friends who sit in the 'family corner'....the conversation was centred around baby sleeping patterns...I mean...ARGH!!!! I guess thats why I also choose to be a bit of a social hermit at the moment. (Im usually on for some fun with friends!) I live in a small town, there are NO singles around my age/stage to hang with. Christian Chat for me is a place to come where I am not judged on the basis of my status!

BUT, the advantages of singleness?? Well, yeah, there are some...I can do what I want, when I want, with the money I got...or in my case, havent got coz Im a student. But, I still yearn to be percieved as 'normal' and be married......however, I have also seen soo many unhappy marriages which also makes me thankful that I have not gone down the path of just settling for some of the guys I could have ended up with.

It is so nice to know there are others out there who face similar barriers within the Christian church.[/quote]

Im not sure if this would help Joy but when you come to Dunners next year you should come to my church and hang out with me. I think you sound awesome and I completely agree with you (even though Im 20). Sometimes I get weirdness from others because Im finally experiencing joy in just focusing on God for once. And what, Im sorry for not already being married with a bun in the oven?
Ive always wanted to just have a womens group of all ages. My group is only made of young female students.
The pressure to marry in my church is not too bad because our church is seen more as a stepping stone for students. Of course there are a few to the exception but they permanently live here. Even though Im interested in someone, I know that I have to focus on next the year and a half on my study. After that, I'll allow my self to moan and whine about marriage and when will it be my turn lol.
 
Last edited:
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top Bottom
Back