Taken for a ride

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Churchgoer said:
These kind of people sorry to say, must have some mental sickness, trauma....
For people to be hooked on, sorry to say, a bit naive at least.

For regular folks, especially matured in Christian faith, no need and refuse to play that kind of drama.
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I personally think attention can be one of the strongest drugs known to humankind (social media being irrefutable proof.)

And it's not even just attention in general -- it can be very specific types of attention.

Some people want romantic attention (even the most mature Christian has wounded areas of their heart that can be susceptible to this) because they've suffered a lot of rejection from the opposite gender, have just lost a spouse, or like collecting conquests (look at King Solomon.)

I've seen some of the most devout, lifelong Christians turn into completely different people when given attention.

Some like to fancy themselves specially set-apart Bible teachers, scholars, and leaders, and come here because they feel lost if they don't have a "following." I'm not talking about the ones who have a legit calling, but the ones who are appoint themselves instead of actually being called by God.

Some people are just incredibly lonely and will literally do/say anything to feel like they have "friends."

Unfortunately, the world is a scary, lonely place for most people, and many find relief in attention or approval -- even if it's in a digitally contrived setting.

I've definitely fallen victim to this myself.
 
seoulsearch said:
I personally think attention can be one of the strongest drugs known to humankind (social media being irrefutable proof.)

And it's not even just attention in general -- it can be very specific types of attention.

Some people want romantic attention (even the most mature Christian has wounded areas of their heart that can be susceptible to this) because they've suffered a lot of rejection from the opposite gender, have just lost a spouse, or like collecting conquests (look at King Solomon.)

I've seen some of the most devout, lifelong Christians turn into completely different people when given attention.

Some like to fancy themselves specially set-apart Bible teachers, scholars, and leaders, and come here because they feel lost if they don't have a "following." I'm not talking about the ones who have a legit calling, but the ones who are appoint themselves instead of actually being called by God.

Some people are just incredibly lonely and will literally do/say anything to feel like they have "friends."

Unfortunately, the world is a scary, lonely place for most people, and many find relief in attention or approval -- even if it's in a digitally contrived setting.

I've definitely fallen victim to this myself.
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Very good analysis.
I have to say scripture really give us a lot practical life tips.

I notice many don't go to local church anymore. But local church indeed provide many friendship, attention that a single person can get. Once we hang out with real people, we are more realistic, less chance to fall into scams.

And if one is committed to local church, you will know at least this person is not too obscure, at least socialable, friendly, to some degree.
 
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The local church one...not so fast. A few of my church friends went to a local church I was also going to at the time. One church member I didn't know that well befriended me, but more like love-bombed me.

She then started asking me to do all sorts of favours like she said she was moving and needed a place to store her stuff. She wanted me to move in with her (to help pay rent) - I didn't do those things.
We went out a few times as friends do. She met my family. Then she asked me if I would go on a mission trip with her --to Pakistan! (which was where some of her family were from) She said it was what God wanted me to do, and if I loved God I'd do it, and we'd be super evangelists and be blessed for doing so. Then she asked me to make a decision while I was driving her on the motorway because she was going to call the travel agent and book a ticket for me and needed my card number...at the time I actually DID have a credit card, and the only way to book tickets was through using one. But she did say to me it was unrefundable. Anyway she was arranging it through a travel agent and speaking Pakistani and of course I didn't. (speak it)

I must have been on a religous high or something thinking I was now doing something amazing for God in saying yes plus I had always wanted to do some kind of missionary work and here was one opporutnity falling into my lap and I'd have a friend to do it with and it didn't even matter that I couldn't speak Pakistani it didn't faze her.

Well when my parents/sister found out I was going to Pakistan with a girl from church they hit the roof! It was a dangerous country didn't I know? We had government warnings about going there. They wanted me to cancel and say I'm not going

So I rang and said sorry I can't go, my family won't let me. My mum won't let me.

The girl then said aren't you an adult? and started insulting me saying I couldn't make my own decisions and she also insulted my mum, who was only trying to look out for me. I wanted to see our pastor and ask him about it but she bet me to it and also bad-mouthed me to him saying I was a flake and things like that.

Arrgh! This was a long time ago and I'd only been going to that church for maybe a year or so. It was a local one. So...???

And when I tried to call the travel agent to cancel the ticket etc they refused and then they swore at me (in English!) so after that incident, I still went to that church but avoided her and didn't want to speak with her anymore. After a couple of years some other things happened at that church - I did make some good friends there, so it wasn't everyone was like that trying to take advantage of me - but I learned to be wary. for me she was like a wolf in sheep's clothing. She also claimed she saw angels etc. She was married and had children but apparently her ex abused her and left her penniless or something. She then came to New Zealand as most people do for a new life. I'm ok with immigrants my mum also was an immigrant, so I wouldn't snub her because of that and I welcomed people of all cultures. But the way she went about abusing my hospitality and sort of bulldozing me in to doing things I didn't really want to do or have time to think about...?!
 
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My mum wondered why she was so clingy and emotional about me and then asked if she was a lesbian! ?!
I wasn't sure about that one but her behaviour was a bit off - though she didn't look like a typical one - she wasn't butch, wore makeup, and was always wearing feminine type clothes that were fashionable. And she had long hair.
I mean she was hosting beauty pamper days at church. She sometimes took Sunday school.

I had no idea why her husband left her, was he not a Christian? I didn't want to pry into her personal relationships unless she divulged because some things are too traumatic to talk about.

So that's my second story...take from it lessons of what you will.
 
About local church, first need to be committed for some time. A few visit is not enough to build trust, just like any social places. Not saying using local church for social, but social is one benefit.
For single or married people, at least get familiar first, before commitment of any kind.

I have been with my church for about 30 years, I basically know the drill in and out. Many new people come just as if taking some spiritual coffee, which is perfect fine. If that's the case, then all they get is just some coffee high for short time.

Need to be at a place at least 6 month to know orientation, then 1 to 2 year to get familiar, then long term commitment to own it as your spiritual home.
 
I was there for at least 3-6 months but on and off because I was already going to another church but a lady from that church stole some sheep (me) from the church that I was going to because she was being super friendly and wanting me to basically be her maid and helper.
It was one of those hillsong type churches, small but with more of a youth focus while my first church was more elderly and I had been going to their ladies bible study for at least a year. I didn't set out to change churches, but they were a bit different and they were local too but just a different local.

But don't assume I got committed on my first visit. They LOVE BOMBED me. I didn't go because I wanted to check it out, they invited me.
 
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I didn't commit to either of them officially (like member) and they didn't even do any baptisms, I had to go to another church that was doing baptisms.

And this church that I went to first was a BAPTIST church lol. I think I only ever witnessed one baptism there!
 
Anyhoo

Otherwise, the older I get, the wiser I become

This does not explain my dad though, the older he gets, the more he forgets his memory stick. I come in handy when he gets these email scams coming up on his inbox. DON"T CLICK ON IT! Delete it, it's a scam!
 
Since "evil" men seem to be the star here


I have a friend from a coffee club...
Decades ago I told him that I had been chatting up Christian women on a website....he could check it out if he wanted to. (Nice guy that also was single)

He did....a "lady" gave him her number so they could talk by phone....he was interested so he did call her and they had a very brief but pleasant conversation.

She then took out a restraining order on him.
No reason....she simply didnt want to converse with him anymore....call block wasn't an option?

Now he was subject to background searches on a yearly basis for his career. Something like this pops up and it's not an automatic termination but it certainly warrants an investigation....so he heads it off by explaining his side of things. He called the issuing authority and zero luck.
So....of course it causes an investigation and for some inane reason....she doubles down and accuses him of stalking and possibly attempted rape. He hasn't visited the city she lives in....literally never been within 50 miles of her.

He loses his job....because his employer really does not care to do a real investigation.....almost loses his career. But someone did a fuller investigation to hire him and discovered the literal mountain of restraining orders she has out on literal strangers. So eventually he got another job....
I felt like dirt because where I never talked to the person he did...I told him about the place. So I felt partially to blame for that psycho woman he met.

But yeah....
Dont even call before you know somebody....it cost my friend his job.

Then it only gets darker from there with the psycho woman who worked for Salvation Army...
The swingers at the AOG church...
The PK wanting a BD and literally hitting up every guy she knew to give her one.
A young guy I know married to a knockout redhead....had an accident and she got pregnant. So he married her....when the baby came out looking like another guy we all knew (black) that was the end of that relationship.

Then theres a different black friend, desperate for wife and kids....fiance abruptly one day breaks up and moves away. Find out later she had his baby and gave it up for adoption in another state.

And the time I unwittingly got involved with a "brand name" pastor's secret daughter. That one was a catastrophe....
Not real big on famous preachers....or their friends. Found out from a disinterested third party that the heat came from girl's mamma calling in "help" to break us up because she wanted to keep her meal ticket at home....I was never that serious about her, just having fun. I was in College....

Evil walks among us in the churches in the singles department.....lots of evil women....lots and lots looking so innocent on Sundays too.
 
JohnDB said:
Since "evil" men seem to be the star here


I have a friend from a coffee club...
Decades ago I told him that I had been chatting up Christian women on a website....he could check it out if he wanted to. (Nice guy that also was single)

He did....a "lady" gave him her number so they could talk by phone....he was interested so he did call her and they had a very brief but pleasant conversation.

She then took out a restraining order on him.
No reason....she simply didnt want to converse with him anymore....call block wasn't an option?

Now he was subject to background searches on a yearly basis for his career. Something like this pops up and it's not an automatic termination but it certainly warrants an investigation....so he heads it off by explaining his side of things. He called the issuing authority and zero luck.
So....of course it causes an investigation and for some inane reason....she doubles down and accuses him of stalking and possibly attempted rape. He hasn't visited the city she lives in....literally never been within 50 miles of her.

He loses his job....because his employer really does not care to do a real investigation.....almost loses his career. But someone did a fuller investigation to hire him and discovered the literal mountain of restraining orders she has out on literal strangers. So eventually he got another job....
I felt like dirt because where I never talked to the person he did...I told him about the place. So I felt partially to blame for that psycho woman he met.

But yeah....
Dont even call before you know somebody....it cost my friend his job.

Then it only gets darker from there with the psycho woman who worked for Salvation Army...
The swingers at the AOG church...
The PK wanting a BD and literally hitting up every guy she knew to give her one.
A young guy I know married to a knockout redhead....had an accident and she got pregnant. So he married her....when the baby came out looking like another guy we all knew (black) that was the end of that relationship.

Then theres a different black friend, desperate for wife and kids....fiance abruptly one day breaks up and moves away. Find out later she had his baby and gave it up for adoption in another state.

And the time I unwittingly got involved with a "brand name" pastor's secret daughter. That one was a catastrophe....
Not real big on famous preachers....or their friends. Found out from a disinterested third party that the heat came from girl's mamma calling in "help" to break us up because she wanted to keep her meal ticket at home....I was never that serious about her, just having fun. I was in College....

Evil walks among us in the churches in the singles department.....lots of evil women....lots and lots looking so innocent on Sundays too.
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All these horror stories about women... And then John complains about dropping birth rates. Gee, I can't imagine why...

For those just tuning in, John is our resident militant misogynist. He was born a few hundred years too late. He would have been right at home leading the charge in the Salem witch trials.
 
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For those "just tuning in"
Lynx is the resident curmudgeon sarcastic idiot....

Theres a reason he is single....its not a pleasant one to hear about either.
 
1783543229381.jpeg

Linx is pushing the chair....
He is kinda desperate so he went cougar-ing
 
JohnDB said:
View attachment 291660

Linx is pushing the chair....
He is kinda desperate so he went cougar-ing
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That does not look ANYTHING like a lynx. And why is the cat so surprised? Cats don't look like that normally.

Also why would you take me off ignore? You should be INCREASING your ignore count. Put seoul on ignore. Then you won't have to deal with her calling you out either.
 
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JohnDB said:
For those "just tuning in"
Lynx is the resident curmudgeon sarcastic idiot....

Theres a reason he is single....its not a pleasant one to hear about either.
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Okay my curiosity is growing. Why AM I still single? I thought it was because I'm too lazy to find a girl.

Oooooh, is it because of some hideous disease?

No, I should let you tell this yourself...

Make it entertaining though. We don't have church tonight because they are redoing the floors. I need a good show to watch.

Well... Now that I said that, you'll withhold the answer until tomorrow, out of spite.
 
It's because Lynx likes his video games and if the girl isn't a gamer like he is, they'd have not much to talk about.

Am I right?
 
Lanolin said:
It's because Lynx likes his video games and if the girl isn't a gamer like he is, they'd have not much to talk about.

Am I right?
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That's actually a pretty good theory.

It's not correct, but with the information you have at hand it's a pretty good theory that would fit observable data.
 
Shall we test that theory...?

There used to be this video game shop in the mall called eb games.
Unfortunately, there was a leak in the ceiling and the games got all wet so they had to close down the store. But I'm sure some girls used to work there. And they'd know what game to take on a desert island.

I would have no clue.

The only video game I ever played (that I willingly chose myself) was Garfield's Lasagna from heaven, and that was over in about 5 minutes.
 
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