Hey Everyone,
Since there was some interest in this thread, I decided to rewrite it in order to re-open the poll to the current CC crowd. As you can tell, it's going to take me some time to re-create the poll, so don't be surprised if it takes a while before you can see the options.
Here is the basic idea behind the thread:
Many years ago (I was just a kid), I knew a Christian couple who got married in my home church. Rumor had it (NO! Say it isn't so!! Rumors in church!) that the two had been best friends for many years and had made an agreement that if neither one was married by age XX, they would marry each other.
Needless to say, the marriage didn't last long... not even a year, if I remember correctly, and was seen as a bit of a scandal.
The two were strong Christians, raised in the faith, attended Bible colleges, and both held positions in the church--they were obviously very Christ-centered--and were best friends. Now I can't say for sure, but I would guess that they felt they were on the right path. After all, isn't this the "magical formula" people say will produce that Christian fairytale marriage everyone talks about? So what do you think went wrong?
At the time I wrote the original thread, I wrote it as a way of challenging the notion I often hear from other Christians: "All you need in order for your marriage to work is to make Jesus the center of your marriage!!!"
Please note that I believe 110% that a marriage needs to be focused on Christ above all else. But if it were true that ALL you need are two Christian adults who agree to put God first, then theoretically, ANY two adult Christians who are opposite gender and single "should" theoretically be able to have a successful marriage, right? So why then, doesn't that happen? Even if two people are completely focused on God, what's the crucial element missing that is needed in addition for a marriage to work?
* Have any of you had similar agreements or ideas with a friend ("I'll marry you by age XX if neither one of us is married yet")? Or would you?
* Do you know anyone else who has had a "marriage pact"?
* How did these agreements turn out, and do you know of any that were successful?
In high school I had a guy friend who once said that even if he and I never felt romantic love, "We'd be best friends and that's something a lot of people never have." We eventually went separate ways in life and you know how they always say hindsight is 20/20? I don't think we would have succeeded at marriage at all. Our friendship was awesome but we were very different people.
What makes our hearts so lonely and desperate that we are willing to grasp at what seems like the final straws? And, let's be real here--I truly believe that in some cases, Christians might agree to marry their opposite sex best friend... Because they want to have sex, but are trying to do so in a holy way. After all, haven't you lost count of the number of times someone has quoted, "It is better to marry than to burn with passion!" to you as a Singles Pep Talk?!
I would love to hear your thoughts.
The poll is anonymous and multiple choice--just give me a minute (or an hour!) to try to re-type everything.
Since there was some interest in this thread, I decided to rewrite it in order to re-open the poll to the current CC crowd. As you can tell, it's going to take me some time to re-create the poll, so don't be surprised if it takes a while before you can see the options.
Here is the basic idea behind the thread:
Many years ago (I was just a kid), I knew a Christian couple who got married in my home church. Rumor had it (NO! Say it isn't so!! Rumors in church!) that the two had been best friends for many years and had made an agreement that if neither one was married by age XX, they would marry each other.
Needless to say, the marriage didn't last long... not even a year, if I remember correctly, and was seen as a bit of a scandal.
The two were strong Christians, raised in the faith, attended Bible colleges, and both held positions in the church--they were obviously very Christ-centered--and were best friends. Now I can't say for sure, but I would guess that they felt they were on the right path. After all, isn't this the "magical formula" people say will produce that Christian fairytale marriage everyone talks about? So what do you think went wrong?
At the time I wrote the original thread, I wrote it as a way of challenging the notion I often hear from other Christians: "All you need in order for your marriage to work is to make Jesus the center of your marriage!!!"
Please note that I believe 110% that a marriage needs to be focused on Christ above all else. But if it were true that ALL you need are two Christian adults who agree to put God first, then theoretically, ANY two adult Christians who are opposite gender and single "should" theoretically be able to have a successful marriage, right? So why then, doesn't that happen? Even if two people are completely focused on God, what's the crucial element missing that is needed in addition for a marriage to work?
* Have any of you had similar agreements or ideas with a friend ("I'll marry you by age XX if neither one of us is married yet")? Or would you?
* Do you know anyone else who has had a "marriage pact"?
* How did these agreements turn out, and do you know of any that were successful?
In high school I had a guy friend who once said that even if he and I never felt romantic love, "We'd be best friends and that's something a lot of people never have." We eventually went separate ways in life and you know how they always say hindsight is 20/20? I don't think we would have succeeded at marriage at all. Our friendship was awesome but we were very different people.
What makes our hearts so lonely and desperate that we are willing to grasp at what seems like the final straws? And, let's be real here--I truly believe that in some cases, Christians might agree to marry their opposite sex best friend... Because they want to have sex, but are trying to do so in a holy way. After all, haven't you lost count of the number of times someone has quoted, "It is better to marry than to burn with passion!" to you as a Singles Pep Talk?!
I would love to hear your thoughts.
The poll is anonymous and multiple choice--just give me a minute (or an hour!) to try to re-type everything.