The Polygamist

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What should the polygamist do?

  • Keep all of his wives

    Votes: 9 42.9%

  • Divorce all of his wives (or they were never his wives in the first place)

    Votes: 1 4.8%

  • He should pick one wife, and divorce the rest

    Votes: 1 4.8%

  • He should keep his first wife and divorce the rest

    Votes: 5 23.8%

  • He should keep his most recent wife and divorce the rest

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • Chicken pot pie (some other answer)

    Votes: 5 23.8%
  • Total voters
    21
AAAPlus

AAAPlus

Senior Member
Aug 2, 2011
601
10
18
I came up with this random scenario. So say there is a guy (not a Christian) who has five wives. All of the wives know about each other, live together with him, and are happy with their marital situation. Say the guy then finds Jesus and becomes a Christian. What should he do about his wives? Should they divorce? Stay together?

What are your thoughts?

Also, what if, instead of him, one of his wives becomes a Christian...should she leave him, or stay?
 
Last edited:
Let the wives decide who would actually like to stay with him... OOOOhh! SNAP! :cool:
 
This is one of those "no right answer" questions but it caught my attention. What would I say to someone I was counseling if they had this situation in real life?

Based on my knowledge of the scriptures concerning marriage and divorce, I would counsel as such:

The man is living in sin. I'm not discussing the wives here. To continue on with this 6 person marriage would be sin. (ongoing adultery). God does not recognize the five wives, only the state does. he would have to divorce 4 of the wives, repent and start dealing with the aftermath. This is the only way he could be clean beore God. There is no decisive scriptural instruction on whether or not divorcing the 4 would be sin. But, even if it was, the sin would be one time and eliminate living in sin.

I have to admit, as I write this, a hundred questions are going through my mind, but I believe the above answer is Scriptural.

I love mind bender what ifs!
 
If what he was doing were against the law of the land, I would imagine he would have to figure out a way to pare it down to one wife due to legal requirements of the country or area in which he lived.

Otherwise, he'd do what was done in the Old Testament, at least I think. Many prominent Biblical figures had umpteen wives and concubines, including David. And God's command to them all was the same--not because He approved of the multiple spouses, but because He was concerned for the people involved, even if it was in the middle of a situation not ordained by God.

God commanded that all wives receive equal amounts of support, and that even if he chose to get rid of a wife, he was to provide for her equally, and that her rations were not to be lessened than any of the others. There is a section in the Bible that talks about David having intimate relations with 10 women (in addition to all the other wives he had, such as Bathsheba, Abigail, and Michal) and for whatever reason, he never went to them again. They had to live out the rest of their lives as widows and apparently were not allowed to remarry. But David was required to provide for each of them equally.

The real question for anyone wanting more than one spouse is, Are you willing to support all of them equally, for the rest of your life, whether you divorce them or not? Because, if I am remembering correctly, that is what God required, even if they were a believer.
 
Honestly, I didn't vote because I don't know anything other than he needs to end up with 1 or 0 wives. How that happens is beyond my understanding... lol.
 
AAAPlus said:
I came up with this random scenario. So say there is a guy (not a Christian) who has five wives. All of the wives know about each other, live together with him, and are happy with their marital situation. Say the guy then finds Jesus and becomes a Christian. What should he do about his wives? Should they divorce? Stay together?

What are your thoughts?

Also, what if, instead of him, one of his wives becomes a Christian...should she leave him, or stay?
Click to expand...

Please provide a Biblical reference as to why polygamy is forbidden.

Martin Luther wrote: "I confess that I cannot forbid a person to marry several wives, for it does not contradict the Scripture. If a man wishes to marry more than one wife he should be asked whether he is satisfied in his conscience that he may do so in accordance with the word of God. In such a case the civil authority has nothing to do in the matter."
 
I going to catch flack for this, but here it goes:
He should stay married to them and love each one as the Lord loves the church.
How can he divorce any of them, if they haven't committed adultery?
If he has more than one wife he is probably either a muslim or a mormon anyway.
David had more than one wife, so did Joseph.
(Look at all the trouble that got them into)
Moral of the story: DON'T MARRY MORE THAN ONE WIFE! - (or husband)
The plan for the reason for marriage was given quite clearly in Genesis. Jesus himself even referred to it.
"For this cause shall a man leave his mother and be married to A woman". (The cause being reproduction)
"And the TWO shall cleave together and be ONE flesh."
 
I suppose that's an option where it's legal. But they would be restricted as to positions of authority in the church they could hold.

RickShafer said:
I going to catch flack for this, but here it goes:
He should stay married to them and love each one as the Lord loves the church.
How can he divorce any of them, if they haven't committed adultery?
If he has more than one wife he is probably either a muslim or a mormon anyway.
David had more than one wife, so did Joseph.
(Look at all the trouble that got them into)
Moral of the story: DON'T MARRY MORE THAN ONE WIFE! - (or husband)
The plan for the reason for marriage was given quite clearly in Genesis. Jesus himself even referred to it.
"For this cause shall a man leave his mother and be married to A woman". (The cause being reproduction)
"And the TWO shall cleave together and be ONE flesh."
Click to expand...
 
While it is not forbidden(as in a thou shalt not), just read what happened to some very Godly men who had more than one wife.
(See Solomon) Also the problems David's and Joseph's children from different wives caused them.
It is clear what Jesus said, and the reason God made male and female.
Paul even refers to it - (the union of marriage) as a type of God's relationship with the church.
How a man could devoet himself fully to his wife if he has more than one is beyond me.....(and Paul), (and Jesus), and (God the Father).
 
These polls have been really interesting... But I'm still kinda miffed that I have yet to receive a chicken pot pie.

(Just think, if you had multiple wives, you would have to provide equally-sized chicken pot pies for all of them.)
 
AAAPlus said:
I came up with this random scenario. So say there is a guy (not a Christian) who has five wives. All of the wives know about each other, live together with him, and are happy with their marital situation. Say the guy then finds Jesus and becomes a Christian. What should he do about his wives? Should they divorce? Stay together?

What are your thoughts?

Also, what if, instead of him, one of his wives becomes a Christian...should she leave him, or stay?
Click to expand...

The first one he married is his true wife in the eyes of God. The rest are adulterers (including him).
 
So David was an adulterer? Before God gave him the kingdom?
Because David married Abigail and Ahinoam before he was king. - (I Sam. 25:40-43)
So God went ahead with His plan for David, even though he was an adulterer in God's eyes?
Must be a different interpretation.
What is an adulterer?
Which of the two wives David married at the same time was the adulteress?
C'mon man.
 
RickShafer said:
So David was an adulterer? Before God gave him the kingdom?
Because David married Abigail and Ahinoam before he was king. - (I Sam. 25:40-43)
So God went ahead with His plan for David, even though he was an adulterer in God's eyes?
Must be a different interpretation.
What is an adulterer?
Which of the two wives David married at the same time was the adulteress?
C'mon man.
Click to expand...

David's other named wives were Michal, the daughter of Saul, and of course, Bathsheba (if having multiple wives wasn't adultery before he got married, David definitely committed adultery after he was married with Bathsheba.)

Even the most well-known Biblical figures were very flawed. Moses was a murderer far before he came back to lead the people out of Israel. Abraham, not once, but twice, was willing to say that Sarah was his sister, knowing full well the abuse she would suffer because of it. Paul/Saul was behind the deaths of numerous Christians before he was called.

The people whom God calls to to the things we remember most... often also commit some of the most memorable sins.
 
I came up with this random scenario. So say there is a guy (not a Christian) who has five wives. All of the wives know about each other, live together with him, and are happy with their marital situation. Say the guy then finds Jesus and becomes a Christian. What should he do about his wives? Should they divorce? Stay together?

What are your thoughts?
Click to expand...

If it were me, I'd have a hard time choosing between each of these five women who actually agreed to marry and love a polygamist. When I read this, Matthew 10:34-38 came to mind.

34 “Do not suppose that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I did not come to bring peace, but a sword. 35 For I have come to turn “‘a man against his father, a daughter against her mother, a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law— 36 a man’s enemies will be the members of his own household.’ 37 “Anyone who loves their father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves their son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. 38 Whoever does not take up their cross and follow me is not worthy of me.
Click to expand...

If I were the him and is willing to commit to following Jesus, then I'd ditch them. Even if it hurts departing from the five women I love the most. Which brings me to Luke 9:57-62

The Cost of Following Jesus

57 As they were walking along the road, a man said to him, “I will follow you wherever you go.” 58 Jesus replied, “Foxes have dens and birds have nests, but the Son of Man has no place to lay his head.” 59 He said to another man, “Follow me.” But he replied, “Lord, first let me go and bury my father.” 60 Jesus said to him, “Let the dead bury their own dead, but you go and proclaim the kingdom of God.” 61 Still another said, “I will follow you, Lord; but first let me go back and say goodbye to my family.” 62 Jesus replied, “No one who puts a hand to the plow and looks back is fit for service in the kingdom of God.”
Click to expand...

It's clear that Jesus asks for our full attention. If I were the polygamist, and followed through with what the bible says, I'd leave my beloved wives.

Also, what if, instead of him, one of his wives becomes a Christian...should she leave him, or stay?
Click to expand...

As the husband, this would hurt me if she were to leave. But our relationship was based on freedom and choice. I chose to have, love and support 5 wives, and those 5 wives chose to love and support me back. If one of them decided to leave out of her newly found relationship or religion, then I wouldn't force her to stay. But it's hard to say what I would do or how I would feel if she chose to stay.

Makes legitimate post with no picture *feels dirty*
 
I think whichever of the ladies does the cooking could decide it rather quickly. Some folks just can’t handle their arsenic. ;)
 
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