"There's someone out there for everyone"

[Socreta93]

Personally I think it's a bunch of crap and some people watched way too many Disney movies growing up. Do you honestly believe in real life, the nerdiest kid in school would get the hot cheerleader? Hell no. I think people like me are probably just better off alone. Don't get me wrong, I kinda want to believe there is someone out there who would actually care about me, but after 26 years with no friends or relationships, it seems like hope is lost. Am I just hopeless or am I right?

 

[Mel85]

Personally I think it's a bunch of crap and some people watched way too many Disney movies growing up.

Ironic for someone who has a pic of an anime as their profile.

 

[cinder]

Well I always took the position that if God could create me with all my quirks and weirdness, he certainly could create and orchestrate another one like or compatible with me ( or 2 or 3 or 300). Of course the existence of such a one wouldn't mean that I should marry said person just because that person exists (person could be female, 30+ years older than me, or some 95% wonderful with an additional 5% so horrible that they'd be a good friend but terrible marriage partner). And I've been blessed enough to run into quite a few people who were remarkably similar to me in some ways and were good friends so I know that at least to a certain extent such people are out there. But despite much christian teaching on the subject to the contrary, I believe God defined what marriage is, how to treat people, and wisdom in considering a potential marriage partner and now he's leaving the actual choice up to us for the most part. So if there's no guarantee that your 1 is out there somewhere, there's also no reason to be hopeless about it.

That being said, if you want to be single, be single. If you want to get married, feel free to talk to people and try to start dating and investigating the possibility. And if you want to be single now but change your mind in a few years time, that's ok too. And while you're contemplating that, it would also be good to wonder how long the nerdiest kid in school would actually want to stay with the stereotypical cheerleader if they did get together? What would they have in common after graduation?

 

[Didymous]

While I don't think there's somebody for everyone, i'm sure most of us could find someone willing to put up with us.

 

[chanchuinchoy]

Personally I think it's a bunch of crap and some people watched way too many Disney movies growing up. Do you honestly believe in real life, the nerdiest kid in school would get the hot cheerleader? Hell no. I think people like me are probably just better off alone. Don't get me wrong, I kinda want to believe there is someone out there who would actually care about me, but after 26 years with no friends or relationships, it seems like hope is lost. Am I just hopeless or am I right?

For your info, I am married (still are now to same girl) when I was 37 years old She came int my life just a month or so when I told God that want a wife in my life.
Personally, I think that time is not right yet, take heart it will arrived someday in future. However, even if you wee to remain single, there isn't wrong right? I have friends who are single and gone into caring ministry and God has really blessed them richly

 

[laughingheart]

As a society we tell ourselves a lot of things. We want promises so we say there is someone for everyone. That isn't how life works. None of us is guaranteed health, a life partner that tomorrow will be better than today. Your looks are irrelevant. They might get you a second look but it is what shines through you that attracts people.
I had a boyfriend who sparkled with humour and was so passionate about God and life. He was a great story teller and an animal whisperer. He was also 5'6" and 260 lbs. He'd been 320. He was not doing well financially and his car was so busted it survived on prayer. Once I started talking to him I saw him and he was pretty wonderful.
What I'm trying to say is that we give ourselves excuses to keep others out. We don't want to give anyone a chance to reject or hurt us so we do it first.
There is an author, Brene Brown, and in her book "Braving the Wilderness" she said this.

Stop walking through the world looking for confirmation that you don't belong. You will always find it because you're made that your mission. Stop scouring people's faces for evidence that you're not enough. You will always find it because you've made that your goal.
True belonging and self-worth are not goods; we don't negotiate their value with the world. The truth about who we are lives in our hearts. Our call to courage is to protect our wild heart against the constant evaluation, especially our own. No one belongs here more than you."

 

[mlssufan01]

Personally I think it's a bunch of crap and some people watched way too many Disney movies growing up. Do you honestly believe in real life, the nerdiest kid in school would get the hot cheerleader? Hell no. I think people like me are probably just better off alone. Don't get me wrong, I kinda want to believe there is someone out there who would actually care about me, but after 26 years with no friends or relationships, it seems like hope is lost. Am I just hopeless or am I right?

unfortunately, most people treat relationships as a commodity or resource; instead of brother or sister in Christ. Why do you think so many refer to their "value" and not just from the church? You'll hear Christians talk about their "worth" and PUA forums talk about "market value." It's all the same; but God called your holiness and righteousness as filthy rags. We all want the hero or heroine in our story but we forget that we are sinners who couldn't possibly be the hero in our story.

 

[Adstar]

Personally I think it's a bunch of crap and some people watched way too many Disney movies growing up. Do you honestly believe in real life, the nerdiest kid in school would get the hot cheerleader? Hell no. I think people like me are probably just better off alone. Don't get me wrong, I kinda want to believe there is someone out there who would actually care about me, but after 26 years with no friends or relationships, it seems like hope is lost. Am I just hopeless or am I right?

I have never believed there was some individual out there for me..

I believe there are probably 10,000 people out there that i would be able to have a decent married life with..

The fairy tale of their being a ""perfect"" person for you out there has done more to destroy the chances of a married life for many people then any other delusion.. If you keep on meeting and rejecting decent people who could have a decent married life with you because you believe there is a perfect unicorn person out there.. Then you will end up old and alone because you are never going to meet someone that does not exist..

 

[TabinRivCA]

Personally I think it's a bunch of crap and some people watched way too many Disney movies growing up. Do you honestly believe in real life, the nerdiest kid in school would get the hot cheerleader? Hell no. I think people like me are probably just better off alone. Don't get me wrong, I kinda want to believe there is someone out there who would actually care about me, but after 26 years with no friends or relationships, it seems like hope is lost. Am I just hopeless or am I right?

Aren't you the young lady who posted songs on CC? If so you are talented, cute and I wonder why you almost sound forlorn. Since we can't go to physical church right now, there are many YT and FB groups starting up with all sorts of formats. That's how my son met his wife and many others I know. You certainly seem like you would be a hit (in a good sense.lol).
Prayers really work, if you believe in them. 'All things are possible with God' and it's not such a stretch to think the right guy will come along for you. I pray God gives you the desires of your heart, as He says He will.

 

[Lynx]

Ironic for someone who has a pic of an anime as their profile.

I might possibly have laughed like a crazy person at this. Maybe. I ain't admitting nothing though.

Stop walking through the world looking for confirmation that you don't belong. You will always find it because you're made that your mission. Stop scouring people's faces for evidence that you're not enough. You will always find it because you've made that your goal.

That. This part right here.

You will find what you're looking for. Even if it's not there to find, you will find enough evidence you can use to support your belief that it is there.

 

[Subhumanoidal]

Aren't you the young lady who posted songs on CC? If so you are talented, cute and I wonder why you almost sound forlorn. Since we can't go to physical church right now, there are many YT and FB groups starting up with all sorts of formats. That's how my son met his wife and many others I know. You certainly seem like you would be a hit (in a good sense.lol).
Prayers really work, if you believe in them. 'All things are possible with God' and it's not such a stretch to think the right guy will come along for you. I pray God gives you the desires of your heart, as He says He will.

Probably not since Soc is a guy. Profiles contain helpful info.

 

[Subhumanoidal]

Ironic for someone who has a pic of an anime as their profile.

Not really. Disney is all about discovering you're a princess, or becoming one, when the prince, who is made just for you, comes along and makes your entire life better forever.
Not sure that quite describes most anime.

 

[Subhumanoidal]

Personally I think it's a bunch of crap and some people watched way too many Disney movies growing up. Do you honestly believe in real life, the nerdiest kid in school would get the hot cheerleader? Hell no. I think people like me are probably just better off alone. Don't get me wrong, I kinda want to believe there is someone out there who would actually care about me, but after 26 years with no friends or relationships, it seems like hope is lost. Am I just hopeless or am I right?

There is not someone for everyone. Nor even a promise of marriage.
But at the same time you're still young and blowing things out of proportion. Being in your 20s and still single means nothing in regards to your future.

 

[Heart_Melody]

Personally I think it's a bunch of crap and some people watched way too many Disney movies growing up. Do you honestly believe in real life, the nerdiest kid in school would get the hot cheerleader? Hell no. I think people like me are probably just better off alone. Don't get me wrong, I kinda want to believe there is someone out there who would actually care about me, but after 26 years with no friends or relationships, it seems like hope is lost. Am I just hopeless or am I right?

I am sorry you are going through this - it gets so tiresome and lonely. Some people can't really grasp it.
I had said pretty much the same thing to my Counselor a week ago. And he told me this:
He said "Remember Matthew 11:28-30 -
then remember Proverbs 16:7 and Proverbs 29:25 and the story of Mary and Martha.

When we are hurt we often have two modes "Pleasing people to earn love" and "Rejection - stay the hell away".
Neither of which will convince people to be your friend.

If you'd like I can try and explain the four passages together as my Counselor explained to me. a Month ago I wanted to die and I had given up on life - You can see that post in the Singles column wasn't long ago - and I have been completely delivered now. I have never felt this way. I suspect this is what people feel when they aren't from places I am from - or have experienced what I experienced. When you grew up in a safe and loving environment where people believed in you.

It's like even though I was saved 12 years and Jesus gave me the key to the prison door- I stayed locked in. A switch turned and it can for you too because God is faithful and not a liar. He did not create you to be lonely and desperately sad.

message me if you wanna talk more - in the meantime stay strong. I am praying for you

 

[Heart_Melody]

While I don't think there's somebody for everyone, i'm sure most of us could find someone willing to put up with us.

I kept telling my granny that my person probably got themselves killed - probably ran over by a bus - or a stampede of wild animals... Or struck by lightning or killed by a shark.

She keeps laughing - but then she looks at me uncertain like "WAIT - do you really believe that or are you joking?" And I just smile because my family still isn't used to my european dry humor And I ain't never gonna tell!!!

 

[Lanolin]

I am sure there are some nerdy cheerleaders out there.

 

[CharliRenee]

There is someOne for everyone. His name is Jesus Christ.

I am sad to know you are feeling all a lonely (how I like to say it when I am feeling similar to what you are expressing). It can be hard, but even in the best of relationships, we have lonely moments. No one can be anyone's all in all. I think God designed us to need His fulfilling. He is the only One that we were all made for.

With that said, I pray that if it is His will for your life, He not only bring you a physical someone to love, but also patience and peace while you wait.

Regardless what happens, I hope you find your One most truest love in Jesus.

 

[CharliRenee]

As a society we tell ourselves a lot of things. We want promises so we say there is someone for everyone. That isn't how life works. None of us is guaranteed health, a life partner that tomorrow will be better than today. Your looks are irrelevant. They might get you a second look but it is what shines through you that attracts people.
I had a boyfriend who sparkled with humour and was so passionate about God and life. He was a great story teller and an animal whisperer. He was also 5'6" and 260 lbs. He'd been 320. He was not doing well financially and his car was so busted it survived on prayer. Once I started talking to him I saw him and he was pretty wonderful.
What I'm trying to say is that we give ourselves excuses to keep others out. We don't want to give anyone a chance to reject or hurt us so we do it first.
There is an author, Brene Brown, and in her book "Braving the Wilderness" she said this.

Stop walking through the world looking for confirmation that you don't belong. You will always find it because you're made that your mission. Stop scouring people's faces for evidence that you're not enough. You will always find it because you've made that your goal.
True belonging and self-worth are not goods; we don't negotiate their value with the world. The truth about who we are lives in our hearts. Our call to courage is to protect our wild heart against the constant evaluation, especially our own. No one belongs here more than you."

Bam!!! Whoa, powerful. Yes yes yes.

 

[Lanolin]

Jesus

the answer to all your Questions is Jesus.

 

[CharliRenee]

While I don't think there's somebody for everyone, i'm sure most of us could find someone willing to put up with us.

Hahaha yay there is hope for us all!!

God Bless you and your straight forward humor.