Thoughts of Christian Dating

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OMC said:
I agree that Christians should not simply assume every cultural practice is acceptable because it is common.
However, I am not convinced that the absence of an explicit biblical institution of dating is sufficient grounds to reject it.
Scripture does not present a single universal method by which a man and woman move toward marriage.
As you noted, the circumstances of Isaac and Rebekah, Jacob and Rachel, and Ruth and Boaz differ considerably.
What Scripture consistently provides are principles governing purity, wisdom, self-control, holiness, and the sanctity of marriage, rather than a prescribed relationship process.

For that reason, I would respectfully suggest that the central issue is not whether dating appears as a recognized institution in Scripture, but whether a particular relationship is conducted in a manner that honors God.
The existence of abuses within modern dating certainly raises valid concerns, and I agree that many contemporary dating practices reflect worldly assumptions rather than biblical values.
Yet demonstrating that a practice is often misused is not the same as demonstrating that it is inherently contrary to Scripture.
A relationship intentionally pursued for the purpose of discerning marriage, conducted in purity, accountability, and submission to biblical principles, seems different in kind from the recreational and serial dating culture that many Christians rightly criticize.

I also agree that simply attaching the adjective "Christian" to a practice does not automatically justify it.
Every practice should be examined in light of Scripture.
At the same time, human-developed social conventions are not necessarily illegitimate simply because they are not explicitly found in the biblical text.
The question is whether they conflict with biblical principles or help facilitate them.
Therefore, while I respect the argument that courtship may often be a wiser approach, I remain unconvinced that Scripture establishes courtship as a required model or that it forbids every form of dating.
It seems to me that the discussion is ultimately one of wisdom and application rather than a matter of explicit biblical prohibition.
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Look, the bottom line is that, either dating, courtship or marriage, it's only as "Christian" as you and your partner. If both of you are true believers - which neither you nor your companion knows for sure, it'll be revealed, tested and proven by a relationship; if both or one of you is only Christian in name, then likewise, it'll be revealed as well, marriage cannot make either of you godly overnight, despite any theology or teachings on how godly the institution is.
 
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OMC said:
I agree that Christians should not simply assume every cultural practice is acceptable because it is common.
However, I am not convinced that the absence of an explicit biblical institution of dating is sufficient grounds to reject it.
Scripture does not present a single universal method by which a man and woman move toward marriage.
As you noted, the circumstances of Isaac and Rebekah, Jacob and Rachel, and Ruth and Boaz differ considerably.
What Scripture consistently provides are principles governing purity, wisdom, self-control, holiness, and the sanctity of marriage, rather than a prescribed relationship process.

For that reason, I would respectfully suggest that the central issue is not whether dating appears as a recognized institution in Scripture, but whether a particular relationship is conducted in a manner that honors God.
The existence of abuses within modern dating certainly raises valid concerns, and I agree that many contemporary dating practices reflect worldly assumptions rather than biblical values.
Yet demonstrating that a practice is often misused is not the same as demonstrating that it is inherently contrary to Scripture.
A relationship intentionally pursued for the purpose of discerning marriage, conducted in purity, accountability, and submission to biblical principles, seems different in kind from the recreational and serial dating culture that many Christians rightly criticize.

I also agree that simply attaching the adjective "Christian" to a practice does not automatically justify it.
Every practice should be examined in light of Scripture.
At the same time, human-developed social conventions are not necessarily illegitimate simply because they are not explicitly found in the biblical text.
The question is whether they conflict with biblical principles or help facilitate them.
Therefore, while I respect the argument that courtship may often be a wiser approach, I remain unconvinced that Scripture establishes courtship as a required model or that it forbids every form of dating.
It seems to me that the discussion is ultimately one of wisdom and application rather than a matter of explicit biblical prohibition.
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There is nothing wrong for singles to have some friendship. Such as helping each other in car shopping, doctors visit...

Single does not have a spouse to help out on these issues, and we can't bother the church every time when we need something.
 
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RodColeman said:
I also find it interesting that you actually set someone up when they expressed their desire to marry. I think, today, the more common response is to tell those people that it'll happen in "God's timing" and thus they shouldn't worry about it. Or a patronizing lecture about how finding a date shouldn't be your "Number One Priority" or whatever, and instead you Number One Priority is "following Jesus." Wow. Really? I didn't know that! :ROFL:
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This is code for fear of rejection or commitment. Like God is supposed to drop a prospective spouse in your lap and does not require any further effort. Good way to avoid possible pain and heartbreak though.

Of course, such a person will never experience an enduring, intimate and romantic relationship that may or may not lead to marriage.

God's 'perfect timing' in matters of the heart requires decisive action if any opportunity should arise otherwise, it is to no avail and rather pointless.

If you wait for all of the T's to be crossed, the I's dotted, and the all the lights to be green then be prepared to life the rest of your life to be alone.

Entering into a prospective relationship is a calculated risk. Eventually you have to throw the dice and let the chips fall where they may. It is all in the wrist (risk).

The game of love is not meant be played by the timid and the meek. That's not going to cut it.
 
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tourist said:
This is code for fear of rejection or commitment. Like God is supposed to drop a prospective spouse in your lap and does not require any further effort. Good way to avoid possible pain and heartbreak though.

Of course, such a person will never experience an enduring, intimate and romantic relationship that may or may not lead to marriage.

God's 'perfect timing' in matters of the heart requires decisive action if any opportunity should arise otherwise, it is to no avail and rather pointless.

If you wait for all of the T's to be crossed, the I's dotted, and the all the lights to be green then be prepared to life the rest of your life to be alone.

Entering into a prospective relationship is a calculated risk. Eventually you have to throw the dice and let the chips fall where they may. It is all in the wrist (risk).

The game of love is not meant be played by the timid and the meek. That's not going to cut it.
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Exactly.

Yes, we need to do it with God. But we still need to do it. :ROFL:
 
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RodColeman said:
Oh, I have done it. I'm not planning to leave this all in "God's hands" or whatever.
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ok so why are you on singles then. Are you engaged or married?

If you are, I must have missed that because you post an awful lot on here and I don't read every post.
 
RodColeman said:
Some recent setbacks with a lot of different things. Career. Car accident. Physical injury. Some things I need to save for first.

All stuff I'd prefer to sort out before I start dating someone, not during.

There's also nobody around that I'm currently interested in. Not really looking at the moment.
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Did you just lose interest in the dates you had before?

Or you totalled your car and lost your job and couldn't afford it.
 
It is a truth universally acknowledges that a single man in possession of a great fortune....something something something.

...must have won it gambling in Las Vegas?
...must spend it all on a lamborghini?
...must be lucky?

I wonder what 'eligble' means :unsure:
I mean, how big a fortune are we talking about here. Enough to be listed in the Fortune 500 magazine?

But hold on, isn't the love of money the root of all marriages?
 
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RodColeman said:
Some recent setbacks with a lot of different things. Career. Car accident. Physical injury. Some things I need to save for first.

All stuff I'd prefer to sort out before I start dating someone, not during.

There's also nobody around that I'm currently interested in. Not really looking at the moment.
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No matter in active mode or not, continue fellowship with fellow believers. God will provide perfect timing and scenario.
Our job is to follow God's guidance.

Blessings.
 
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