It's not a sin, but God did say, "Be fruitful and multiply..."(Gen. 1:28)
I never married nor had children, but I like to think my fruitfulness revolves around sharing the Gospel of Jesus, and His wonderful saving grace. Glory be to God.
Want marriage but no kids
- Thread starter HistoryPrincess
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I never married nor had children, but I like to think my fruitfulness revolves around sharing the Gospel of Jesus, and His wonderful saving grace. Glory be to God.
My own interpretation of this is that 'be fruitful and multiply' means have at least three kids to replace the couple. Let's say a man's wife's died and he had three kids already, and he was marrying a young woman who'd never had kids. Multiplying means having two more. Anything less is replacement, not multiplying. That's how I'd interpret it, personally.
Pragmatically, if a 23-year-old Christian womand didn't see it that way, wanted marriage and sex, but no more kids, one option would be to marry a man who couldn't have kids or marry a widower who'd had as many kids as he wanted and had a vasectomy with his first wife. That way she wouldn't have to have her tubes tied. If she changes her mind, reversing his would probably be a lot easier, medically, even if the chances aren't 100%. I read they'd come out with a more easily reversible method.
One of the possibilities for a 23-year-old to consider is that, as her biological drive clicks in, she might actually start to want to have children. If she changes her mind and she's married to a sterilized man or she sterilized herself.
The other issue is that birth control, condoms, even vasectomies, are not 100% foolproof methods of birth control. It's wrong to have your baby murdered in the womb, so anyone who gets married should be willing to be a parent if their reproductive activities actually lead to reproduction. The reason for the sex drive, after all, is that it drives people to reproduce.
Pragmatically, if a 23-year-old Christian womand didn't see it that way, wanted marriage and sex, but no more kids, one option would be to marry a man who couldn't have kids or marry a widower who'd had as many kids as he wanted and had a vasectomy with his first wife. That way she wouldn't have to have her tubes tied. If she changes her mind, reversing his would probably be a lot easier, medically, even if the chances aren't 100%. I read they'd come out with a more easily reversible method.
One of the possibilities for a 23-year-old to consider is that, as her biological drive clicks in, she might actually start to want to have children. If she changes her mind and she's married to a sterilized man or she sterilized herself.
The other issue is that birth control, condoms, even vasectomies, are not 100% foolproof methods of birth control. It's wrong to have your baby murdered in the womb, so anyone who gets married should be willing to be a parent if their reproductive activities actually lead to reproduction. The reason for the sex drive, after all, is that it drives people to reproduce.
I would like to be married someday and I also don't want kids either. I like kids I'm just not interested in being a mom. I have a lot of illness in my family that are heretery and also kids are expensive and I suffer with migraines. I have a cat and a dog and they are my kids lol.
Y
Yahweh_is_gracious
Guest
Whether it actually exists or not, it oftentimes feels as though society applies pressure to people to "get married and have kids", and if you don't conform, you're made to feel as though you are defective or "wrong" for not wanting to do the same thing everyone else does. Even if it's not completely unacceptable to be single and child-free, there are the never-ending questions from people about your choices, or my favorite, the snide comments about "oh, can't find anyone, huh?" or others that are entirely too inappropriate for reprinting here at CC.
I see nothing wrong with wanting to be married but NOT wanting to have children. It's okay, IMHO, to not want kids. SOme folks don't want kids, and they have their reasons, and their reasons are valid.
I see nothing wrong with wanting to be married but NOT wanting to have children. It's okay, IMHO, to not want kids. SOme folks don't want kids, and they have their reasons, and their reasons are valid.
In the US? Where 40% of kids are born out of wedlock? That's much more the case in other countries. I've lived in Indonesia, and the pressure is much greater. And when you get married, someone at the office might ask about pregnancy, "Are you pregnant yet?", "Is your wife pregnant yet?", "Is there any good news?" "Are there any contents yet or not?"
That's incredibly rude. Who do you hang around with that says things like that? I haven't noticed that sort of thing so much in the US, where it is kind of socially acceptable to not marry compared to the rest of the world, but I guess there are some rude people. But I think it is fairly common for mothers, aunts, and grandmas do ask those uncomfortable questions.
Fairly common for mothers, aunts, grandmas and certain people at work. >.> I get a lot of nosy inquiries about why I'm not married with 2.6 kids yet. Some people just can't seem to wrap their brains around the fact that I'm not actively seeking a wife or even a date. It's not just a foreign concept to them, it's a whole different mental paradigm they can't jump to.
sorry for barging into Singles again...
i just want to commend those of you who recognize you don't want kids, and don't have any.
forget the army, raising kids is the toughest job you'll ever love.
if you know you don't want to be a parent, please, please do not have children.
it's difficult enough to do when you desire to be a parent; can't imagine if you didn't.
i just want to commend those of you who recognize you don't want kids, and don't have any.
forget the army, raising kids is the toughest job you'll ever love.
if you know you don't want to be a parent, please, please do not have children.
it's difficult enough to do when you desire to be a parent; can't imagine if you didn't.
W
wwjd_kilden
Guest
Ok, in short:
- Nothing sinful or wrong about not wanting to have children
- If you don't want children, avoid doing what leads to children
-- If you "must" do those things anyway, remember that the, erhm, temporary methods, are NOT failsafe,
...besides, though I can't speak from experience I imagine there are many things you can do without ....doing it... you know...
- Nothing sinful or wrong about not wanting to have children
- If you don't want children, avoid doing what leads to children
-- If you "must" do those things anyway, remember that the, erhm, temporary methods, are NOT failsafe,
...besides, though I can't speak from experience I imagine there are many things you can do without ....doing it... you know...
S
Siberian_Khatru
Guest
When it comes to being worried about passing down illnesses to your children, you can adopt.
I always figured that if I were to get married, Id want to adopt a child.
M
Mooky
Guest
I never married nor had children, but I like to think my fruitfulness revolves around sharing the Gospel of Jesus, and His wonderful saving grace. Glory be to God.
Amen , Utah ....why bring more people into the world when there are thousands already who need our love and care? ...is my reasoning ....the kingdom grows through spiritual rebirth not by multiplying like animals.
I had random people, I.E. customers co workers ask me why I wasn't married and when I did get married, why don't you have kid's? Before I had kid's . Oh and if anyone found out that I was 30 something it was, what are you waiting for? You're not getting any younger.
Unfortunatly people can be ignorantly rude and not think twice about it.
I was about 25 or 26 in Indonesia when a friend's elderly mother-in-law asked me why I wasn't married. My friend explained the question a bit. I think she thought I was a catch, so why wasn't I married. I told her I hadn't found the right person. That was a more common question in Indonesia.
I was trying to think of other answers, I could say, "I'm scared of commitment." wasn't true. I tried, "I'm too ugly."
If someone asked "When are you getting married?" I could pick a random date a couple of years into the future and say I hadn't found the right person yet, but that was my plan so far.
I was trying to think of other answers, I could say, "I'm scared of commitment." wasn't true. I tried, "I'm too ugly."
If someone asked "When are you getting married?" I could pick a random date a couple of years into the future and say I hadn't found the right person yet, but that was my plan so far.
R
ROSSELLA
Guest
Just wanted to say you're not alone in this. Of course, I go back and forth on whether I ever want to be married or not. But I don't want kids either, even when I do think it might be nice to be married some day. You're not the only one.
funny story that happened to me on Saturday. I was at work and one of the older regular customers came in and hes in his 70's or 80's and he asked how old I was and how come I wasn't married yet and if I was waiting for him I laughed and said no. Another guy made me a rose from a napkin when I came to his table to take his plate I think it was lets hit on becky day lol.
It's hit on Becky day?
*perk*
*PERK*
So Becky, what are you doing tonight?
What? SATURDAY was hit on Becky day? Shoot, I missed it!
*perk*
*PERK*
So Becky, what are you doing tonight?
What? SATURDAY was hit on Becky day? Shoot, I missed it!
hahaha Lynx your funny lol. I'm not doing anything tonight except for choir practice at church and then sleeping I work tomorrow lol
I don't think that it's unbiblical not having kids ,what is unbiblical is having kids and not teaching them a moral foundation of principles to build on.
For that you would probably need the inclination,and that probably comes with real love for the child,when I say real love I mean a love that encompasses their entire being.
So you wouldn't only want to see them happy in this life but the next also,unfortunately that love is missing in today's society hence the end of the world.
Seeing as how you don't have the inclination to have children in the first place you probably won't have the inclination to teach them the necessities although like many have already stated that could change.
So you want to marry so that you can have lots of sex and not go to hell?hmmm
With that mindset going in you are bound to have problems,what's going to happen when you get bored with having sex with the same old person?
That's a inevitably in your particular case.
You are 23 correct? That's the age of adulthood,part of being a adult is having the self control and common sense to NOT be whipped on sex like a boy crazy teenage girl.
If you really don't want to go to hell yo have to address that first.
At least you have enough awareness to have not made a big mistake already,that's somethin....that's not nothin!
It's not a whole lot but hey it is what it is.
People like you are one of the main reasons that God is ending the world,think about it practically.
What do you think will happen to ANY species when the female half consciously chooses to not procreate because it's no fun?
That species will eventually die out correct?
That's what is happening right now and God is seeing it.
So possibly He's saying"you guys want to die out?OK I can help you with that".
You aren't alone there are millions just like you,young oversexed girls like you are the reason the the world economy is collapsing.
Have your fun while you can.
For that you would probably need the inclination,and that probably comes with real love for the child,when I say real love I mean a love that encompasses their entire being.
So you wouldn't only want to see them happy in this life but the next also,unfortunately that love is missing in today's society hence the end of the world.
Seeing as how you don't have the inclination to have children in the first place you probably won't have the inclination to teach them the necessities although like many have already stated that could change.
So you want to marry so that you can have lots of sex and not go to hell?hmmm
With that mindset going in you are bound to have problems,what's going to happen when you get bored with having sex with the same old person?
That's a inevitably in your particular case.
You are 23 correct? That's the age of adulthood,part of being a adult is having the self control and common sense to NOT be whipped on sex like a boy crazy teenage girl.
If you really don't want to go to hell yo have to address that first.
At least you have enough awareness to have not made a big mistake already,that's somethin....that's not nothin!
It's not a whole lot but hey it is what it is.
People like you are one of the main reasons that God is ending the world,think about it practically.
What do you think will happen to ANY species when the female half consciously chooses to not procreate because it's no fun?
That species will eventually die out correct?
That's what is happening right now and God is seeing it.
So possibly He's saying"you guys want to die out?OK I can help you with that".
You aren't alone there are millions just like you,young oversexed girls like you are the reason the the world economy is collapsing.
Have your fun while you can.