Sister, take a breath.
What I hear in your post is not someone trying to rebel against God.
I hear someone who genuinely cares, sees problems in the world, and doesn't want people to be deceived.
The fact that you're asking "Is this God, or is it me?" is actually a healthy sign.
People who are hardened usually aren't asking that question.
You're bringing your concerns to the Lord and you're examining your own heart.
Yes, Christians should care about truth.
Yes, Christians should call people to repentance.
Yes, we should speak when we see deception.
But remember that Jesus never asked you to carry the weight of fixing the whole world.
He asked you to follow Him.
Sometimes we see a real problem and assume God is calling us to solve it.
Other times God is simply showing us that we need to pray, trust Him, and remain faithful where we are.
Not every burden is a calling.
I would ask a simple question: does this lead you closer to Christ, deeper into Scripture, greater humility, greater love, and greater peace in God's sovereignty?
Or does it leave you fearful, angry, exhausted, and feeling responsible for everyone else?
Jesus said: "Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest." (Matt. 11:28)
Sister, you are not responsible for waking everyone up.
You are responsible for being faithful yourself.
Speak the truth when God gives you opportunity.
Love people.
Pray for them.
Point them to Christ.
Then trust God with the results.
And one more thing: stop apologizing to God for being slow.
Moses thought he wasn't good enough.
Gideon thought he was the wrong man.
Jeremiah thought he was too young.
God has always worked through ordinary, imperfect people.
So don't ask, "Am I worthy?" None of us are.
Ask instead, "Is Christ sufficient?"
The answer to that is always yes.
Rest in Him a little, sister.
The world is not hanging on your shoulders.
It is hanging on His.
