What Is There to Look Forward to in Life "After You Reach a Certain Age"?

[seoulsearch]

Hey Everyone,

My childhood best friend and I were talking about this a long time ago. She's the only person (besides my family) who has pretty much known me all my life. We met in kindergarten when we were 5 years old and still talk to this day.

One afternoon, we were talking about all the major milestones we've seen each other through while growing up:

* Catechism and our First Communion (a very big milestone in the Lutheran church.)
* Starting high school, which was a very big deal because we went to the same Lutheran school kindergarten through 8th grade -- high school was the first time we were "split up," and going to different schools.
* Driver's ed (back when it was free,) turning 16, getting our licenses and being able to drive by ourselves.
* Turning 21, even though neither of us are drinkers.
* Graduating high school and college.
* First jobs, both as teens, and then out of college.
* First time living on our own, finding apartments and houses.
* First dates, and, "Is this 'The One'"?!
* Getting married (and for me, she was there for me when my husband divorced me for his girlfriend.)
* For her, the births of her children and now watching their milestones as they grow.

Though she has several more milestones to go with her kids, we talked about the fact that everything seems to matter when we're young. We found ourselves asking the question, "What is there left to look forward to -- collecting Social Security?"

How would you answer this question?

* For those of us past the age of major milestones, or don't have kids, or have kids who are having milestones of their own, what's left to look forward to in life?

* What kinds of new milestones do you set for yourself to keep life interesting? Retirement? Traveling with your spouse?

* For those who don't have a spouse, what kinds of things do you plan to do on your own?

* What keeps life interesting, and how do you continue to follow God's purpose for your life in later years?

Like most people, I find myself fighting to feel like there is relevant meaning in my life as I get older. I've found this especially challenging since I have no family of my own.

I know that a lot of people will say to volunteer, serve others, take the time to get closer to God, etc., but what do you find yourself turning to when you've done those things and still find yourself running on empty?

 

[Bob-Carabbio]

What is there left to look forward to

Death, and whatever God has provided for us, that we can't even imagine - yet.

 

[seoulsearch]

Death, and whatever God has provided for us, that we can't even imagine - yet.

I have often felt that many Christians I knew promoted death as the ultimate goal of the Christian life, and of course I understand why.

But if death is the thing we're all striving for, especially for Christians who believe the best comes after this life, what motivation is there to stay here?

* For those who don't believe in ending one's time on the earth on their own, what keeps them from trying to die as soon as possible?

* For those who believe they can choose to die and still go to heaven, what keeps them here?

This is an earnest question and not sarcasm, as I have heard all my life, "Just wait 'til we're with Jesus and everything is perfect!"

And so, from the time I was a kid, I always wondered, "If being with Jesus is perfect, why aren't we all working to get there with him as quickly as we can?" I couldn't understand why everyone said that but no one took the time to explain why there was any point in living if this was the case.

 

[RodB651]

For those of us past the age of major milestones, or don't have kids, or have kids who are having milestones of their own, what's left to look forward to in life?

* What kinds of new milestones do you set for yourself to keep life interesting? Retirement? Traveling with your spouse?

* For those who don't have a spouse, what kinds of things do you plan to do on your own?

My kids are pretty much doing there own things now. We get together when we can and do whatever.
What I would like to do between now and the next three years or so, is build out a camper van. I'd also like to get a few acres and put a small house on it, maybe one of those barns you can buy at home depot. All that could change between now and then...

What keeps life interesting, and how do you continue to follow God's purpose for your life in later years?

Like most people, I find myself fighting to feel like there is relevant meaning in my life as I get older. I've found this especially challenging since I have no family of my own.

I know that a lot of people will say to volunteer, serve others, take the time to get closer to God, etc., but what do you find yourself turning to when you've done those things and still find yourself running on empty?

There are times when I struggle with the idea of my purpose,.. What is my purpose?

I do volunteer with our "feed the hungry" program at church and help out with the "Operation Christmas Child" program.

 

[RodB651]

This is an earnest question and not sarcasm, as I have heard all my life, "Just wait 'til we're with Jesus and everything is perfect!"

But the sarcasm can be real!

 

[seoulsearch]

What is there left to look forward to?

Death, and whatever God has provided for us, that we can't even imagine - yet.

If death is the thing we're all striving for, especially for Christians who believe the best comes after this life, what motivation is there to stay here? This is an earnest question and not sarcasm, as I have heard all my life, "Just wait 'til we're with Jesus and everything is perfect!"

But the sarcasm can be real!

The reason why I've always had questions around being told that death is the highest point of the Christian life -- without explaining why life needs to be lived -- is because I've always thought about the implications of this teaching regarding evangelism.

We all want everyone to be saved.

But what is that supposed to look like? Do we tell people, "Put your trust and repentance in Jesus, because all you have to do is DIE, and then you can live forever with Him in eternal perfection!"

What motivation does that give a new Christian to keep on living?

And for those that teach that nothing can cause you to lose your salvation, not even self-chosen death, how would they convince a new Christian who struggles with depression/suicidal thoughts from ending their life, when the reward and highest goal of Christianity -- is to die and be with Jesus, preferably as soon as possible?

 

[Bob-Carabbio]

what motivation is there to stay here?

When you're 82, and in poor health (Diabetes, Coronary artery disease, Congestive heart failure, and the effects of aging) motivation to wake up in the morning is kind of hard to come by.

 

[RodB651]

The reason why I've always had questions around being told that death is the highest point of the Christian life -- without explaining why life needs to be lived -- is because I've always thought about the implications of this teaching regarding evangelism.

lol..
Thou pokest with a stick!

 

[seoulsearch]

When you're 82, and in poor health (Diabetes, Coronary artery disease, Congestive heart failure, and the effects of aging) motivation to wake up in the morning is kind of hard to come by.

I can certainly empathize with your situation, and I am sincerely sorry to hear this. I have/have had family members going through this, along with things like the death of a spouse, loss of mobility, etc.

I've heard it often said that getting older is not for the weak.

May God bless and comfort you, and I will definitely keep you in my prayers.

 

[seoulsearch]

lol..
Thou pokest with a stick!

*smile*

If one glances through my past threads...

I kind of think it's part of what God built me to do.

I'm pretty sure I was born with an endless supply of sticks... and an automatic sharpener.

 

[Cameron143]

Hey Everyone,

My childhood best friend and I were talking about this a long time ago. She's the only person (besides my family) who has pretty much known me all my life. We met in kindergarten when we were 5 years old and still talk to this day.

One afternoon, we were talking about all the major milestones we've seen each other through while growing up:

* Catechism and our First Communion (a very big milestone in the Lutheran church.)
* Starting high school, which was a very big deal because we went to the same Lutheran school kindergarten through 8th grade -- high school was the first time we were "split up," and going to different schools.
* Driver's ed (back when it was free,) turning 16, getting our licenses and being able to drive by ourselves.
* Turning 21, even though neither of us are drinkers.
* Graduating high school and college.
* First jobs, both as teens, and then out of college.
* First time living on our own, finding apartments and houses.
* First dates, and, "Is this 'The One'"?!
* Getting married (and for me, she was there for me when my husband divorced me for his girlfriend.)
* For her, the births of her children and now watching their milestones as they grow.

Though she has several more milestones to go with her kids, we talked about the fact that everything seems to matter when we're young. We found ourselves asking the question, "What is there left to look forward to -- collecting Social Security?"

How would you answer this question?

* For those of us past the age of major milestones, or don't have kids, or have kids who are having milestones of their own, what's left to look forward to in life?

* What kinds of new milestones do you set for yourself to keep life interesting? Retirement? Traveling with your spouse?

* For those who don't have a spouse, what kinds of things do you plan to do on your own?

* What keeps life interesting, and how do you continue to follow God's purpose for your life in later years?

Like most people, I find myself fighting to feel like there is relevant meaning in my life as I get older. I've found this especially challenging since I have no family of my own.

I know that a lot of people will say to volunteer, serve others, take the time to get closer to God, etc., but what do you find yourself turning to when you've done those things and still find yourself running on empty?

I don't understand why people don't see everyday as a new and great adventure. Each day is a day the LORD has made. It is unique in every regard. It is the only day that will bear its date. And the things that occur on each particular day will only occur that day.

If you couple this with the fact that God is always working in us to will and do of His good pleasure, the only way to work it out is to employ the day we are given.

We have a choice each day. We can see the drudgery that lies ahead or the adventure. Who doesn't like an adventure?

Whether therefore we eat, or drink, or do laundry or mow grass, or whatsoever we do, it can be done to the glory of God...NCV...New Cameron Version.

 

[seoulsearch]

I don't understand why people don't see everyday as a new and great adventure. Each day is a day the LORD has made. It is unique in every regard. It is the only day that will bear its date. And the things that occur on each particular day will only occur that day.

If you couple this with the fact that God is always working in us to will and do of His good pleasure, the only way to work it out is to employ the day we are given.

We have a choice each day. We can see the drudgery that lies ahead or the adventure. Who doesn't like an adventure?

Whether therefore we eat, or drink, or do laundry or mow grass, or whatsoever we do, it can be done to the glory of God...NCV...New Cameron Version.

I can only speak for myself, but I've had a lifelong tendency towards depression and have met many people/made many friends who also struggle with it.

I understand the viewpoint you are presenting and appreciate this outlook, as I have heard it throughout my life, especially within the church, but for some of us, it just doesn't come naturally, nor can it be faked, coaxed, or in some cases, medically induced.

Believe me though, I have often envied the ones for whom it seems to be a regular state of mind.

I relate much more to the other side -- when the clouds of depression are what seems normal, and the glimpses of light between the clouds are treasured, but often rare.

And from what I have seen, neither side can very well understand or fully accept the other.

 

[Cameron143]

I can only speak for myself, but I've had a lifelong tendency towards depression and have met many people/made many friends who also struggle with it.

I understand the viewpoint you are presenting and appreciate this outlook, as I have heard it throughout my life, especially within the church, but for some of us, it just doesn't come naturally, nor can it be faked, coaxed, or in some cases, medically induced.

Believe me though, I have often envied the ones for whom it seems to be a regular state of mind.

I relate much more to the other side -- when the clouds of depression are what seems normal, and the glimpses of light between the clouds are treasured, but often rare.

And from what I have seen, neither side can very well understand or fully accept the other.

Depression is real as is spiritual depression. I suffered with it the first 5 years after being saved. I didn't magically come out of it. And while certainly not trained in psychology, I know what God showed me. And mostly it was simply looking at things from God's perspective.
I'm not trying to be critical here or presume I know more about you than you do yourself. But if you can, step back from your post and read it as though someone else wrote it. What's the first thing you notice?

 

[seoulsearch]

I'm not trying to be critical here or presume I know more about you than you do yourself. But if you can, step back from your post and read it as though someone else wrote it. What's the first thing you notice?

Although I used a different example in my opening post, the true inspiration behind this thread isthat a lifelong Christian family friend who, in the past few years, went through the death of their spouse, and just recently, the shocking, unexpected death of their adult child.

No parent, especially a Christian parent, who is told God wants only the best for them and their family, expects to bury their child at any age.

I sent a letter of my condolences and received their reply a few days ago. This person basically said, "I'm praying for the strength to go on." This person is heartbroken, asking God why did you take my family and leave me behind, why don't you just take me as well, and, if it's your will for me to go on, please help me, because I don't know how."

And I have been asking God how I should answer, because the worst thing to me, is to not answer someone who is pouring out their heart to you and you don't know what to say, so all you can do is recite a passage, but without any personal word of comfort.

You asked what I see if I step back from this post and read it as though someone else wrote it. I could be wrong, but I'm assuming you're trying to make the point that I've heard from other Christians all my life, "Are you noticing that all you're talking about is yourself, your own life, and your own concerns?"

But when I read this thread from the perspective from which I'm writing it, what I am really trying to say is, I have a beloved lifelong friend who is crying out for a reason to go on after feeling they have lost everything.

How do I answer in a way that will properly and compassionately convey God's comfort and purpose to them?

 

[Seeker47]

God does not need us for anything! Yet throughout our lives he has continuously asked us to give the control to him. Why?

Most of us cling to our self will, refusing to let go. We do things our own way because we believe we know what is best for us. Our self-clinging souls may well live its entire life as it wants. Yet one thing I know absolutely. A time will come when we can no longer cling to our self-will. That option will be taken away. Many will find themselves without the necessary experience and practice of letting God handle the details. These are the ones who suffer must, and they are the ones God has been trying hardest to change.

Plan all you like but in the end God will show you what he wants even when everything we value is lost. He then wants you to be able to hear him. That takes practice.

Not an easy answer, but in the end we are left only with the will of God and nothing of our own.

 

[Lynx]

Although I used a different example in my opening post, the true inspiration behind this thread isthat a lifelong Christian family friend who, in the past few years, went through the death of their spouse, and just recently, the shocking, unexpected death of their adult child.

No parent, especially a Christian parent, who is told God wants only the best for them and their family, expects to bury their child at any age.

I sent a letter of my condolences and received their reply a few days ago. This person basically said, "I'm praying for the strength to go on." This person is heartbroken, asking God why did you take my family and leave me behind, why don't you just take me as well, and, if it's your will for me to go on, please help me, because I don't know how."

And I have been asking God how I should answer, because the worst thing to me, is to not answer someone who is pouring out their heart to you and you don't know what to say, so all you can do is recite a passage, but without any personal word of comfort.

You asked what I see if I step back from this post and read it as though someone else wrote it. I could be wrong, but I'm assuming you're trying to make the point that I've heard from other Christians all my life, "Are you noticing that all you're talking about is yourself, your own life, and your own concerns?"

But when I read this thread from the perspective from which I'm writing it, what I am really trying to say is, I have a beloved lifelong friend who is crying out for a reason to go on after feeling they have lost everything.

How do I answer in a way that will properly and compassionately convey God's comfort and purpose to them?

I don't know how to answer that. All I have is an observation: I have never had any of those things he lost, and I am interested in seeing what each day brings.

Maybe having something and losing it is NOT better than never having it at all. So much for the old saying.

Maybe the answer is to look at people who have not had what you lost, and ask them what they live for.

I have no idea if it IS the answer... I've never been on that side of the question. I'm just observing it's a possibility.

 

[Cameron143]

Although I used a different example in my opening post, the true inspiration behind this thread isthat a lifelong Christian family friend who, in the past few years, went through the death of their spouse, and just recently, the shocking, unexpected death of their adult child.

No parent, especially a Christian parent, who is told God wants only the best for them and their family, expects to bury their child at any age.

I sent a letter of my condolences and received their reply a few days ago. This person basically said, "I'm praying for the strength to go on." This person is heartbroken, asking God why did you take my family and leave me behind, why don't you just take me as well, and, if it's your will for me to go on, please help me, because I don't know how."

And I have been asking God how I should answer, because the worst thing to me, is to not answer someone who is pouring out their heart to you and you don't know what to say, so all you can do is recite a passage, but without any personal word of comfort.

You asked what I see if I step back from this post and read it as though someone else wrote it. I could be wrong, but I'm assuming you're trying to make the point that I've heard from other Christians all my life, "Are you noticing that all you're talking about is yourself, your own life, and your own concerns?"

But when I read this thread from the perspective from which I'm writing it, what I am really trying to say is, I have a beloved lifelong friend who is crying out for a reason to go on after feeling they have lost everything.

How do I answer in a way that will properly and compassionately convey God's comfort and purpose to them?

What I was hoping you would see in your opening post was how centered it was on the things of this world. All the accomplishments were worldly as were future prospects. And while there is no reason not to include these things as they are gifts of God, we very often find life in things other than God. And God often removes those things from our lives that we might seek life in Him. And the greater our reluctance to the loss of these things, the greater the life we were drawing from them.

Consider, for a moment, how God physically made us. We need oxygen every 3 minutes or we die. We need water every 3 days or we die. We need food every 30 days or we die. This is all true of man before sin entered. Why did God make us this way? If it's true that we understand the invisible things of God by what is seen...Romans 1, perhaps God made us spiritually dependent as well. That is, spiritual life needs spiritual sustenance just physical life needs material sustenance. And so it is. There is no spiritual life that isn't found in God. But just as we can physically consume things that bring physical death,we can substitute things spiritually for God that will also bring spiritual death.
God is good and always does what is our highest good. Sometimes it doesn't appear that this is so from our perspective.

Some things are hard to understand, and even when understood, hard to accept. There are a host of reasons for this. And I doubt your friend could receive such things in her fragile estate. Sometimes saying nothing is best. After all, Job's friends didn't err until they spoke. If you have opportunity, just go sit with your friend.

 

[NightTwister]

Travel. Lots and lots of travel. I've been to 43 states, 30 countries, and 5 continents. Would love to get that to 50, 100 and 6.

 

[seoulsearch]

Some things are hard to understand, and even when understood, hard to accept. There are a host of reasons for this. And I doubt your friend could receive such things in her fragile estate. Sometimes saying nothing is best. After all, Job's friends didn't err until they spoke. If you have opportunity, just go sit with your friend.

I don't have the opportunity to sit with my friend, as they are thousands of miles away. My friend and their family are devout Christians and one of the reasons I admire them so much is because throughout their tragedies and hardships through their lives, not just this, they have never failed to point to God as their ultimate guide. (I'm also just using generic pronouns to protect the family's privacy, certainly not because of any ridiculous woke agendas.)

All donations/money for flowers were asked to be contributed to their church and Christian schools their children and grandchildren grew up in.

You definitely make an interesting point about Job's friend being in the wrong once they spoke, but in this situation, I do believe God is telling me to write a response. In fact, that's been one of my own recent struggles. I feel God is pushing me to reach out to some individuals when I really don't know what to say, but I trust He'll let me know when I put the pen to paper.

The greatest compliment I ever received on my writing was when a prison inmate said, "God seems to have given you this ability to make it feel like you're sitting right here, talking, listening, and comforting someone in person, even though it's just in a letter," and I believe this is the way in which God is wanting me to minister to this family friend.

And this is why I'm taking some time to ask Him, and gather ideas, as to what needs to be said, and how, when making a reply.

 

[Cameron143]

I don't have the opportunity to sit with my friend, as they are thousands of miles away. My friend and their family are devout Christians and one of the reasons I admire them so much is because throughout their tragedies and hardships through their lives, not just this, they have never failed to point to God as their ultimate guide. (I'm also just using generic pronouns to protect the family's privacy, certainly not because of any ridiculous woke agendas.)

All donations/money for flowers were asked to be contributed to their church and Christian schools their children and grandchildren grew up in.

You definitely make an interesting point about Job's friend being in the wrong once they spoke, but in this situation, I do believe God is telling me to write a response. In fact, that's been one of my own recent struggles. I feel God is pushing me to reach out to some individuals when I really don't know what to say, but I trust He'll let me know when I put the pen to paper.

The greatest compliment I ever received on my writing was when a prison inmate said, "God seems to have given you this ability to make it feel like you're sitting right here, talking, listening, and comforting someone in person, even though it's just in a letter," and I believe this is the way in which God is wanting me to minister to this family friend.

And this is why I'm taking some time to ask Him, and gather ideas, as to what needs to be said, and how, when making a reply.

I wasn't trying to dissuade you from writing or calling your friend. I was merely offering another perspective. You know better than I how God is leading you.