Who here has cats?

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candycane7

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Hi,

I wonder is it "normal" for cats to basically be incalculable and to sometimes hish or even try to scratch or bite their owners?

I have been feeding a cat in the neighborhood treats for over 10 years. This cat knows me and she also knows that I don't do anything

to her and yet she sometimes hisses at me when I just try to pet her a bit and at times she even tried to bite!

In my opinion such a behavior is absolutely unacceptable. I take this personally.

There is NO reason at all for this cat to feel threatened by me.



I really wonder is this normal? Are all cats like this? Are there NO cats out there which "know" that it's not okay to try to scratch or bite

friendly humans who have been nothing but good to them? I don't even want to know how much I have spent for treats for this cat in

the past 10 years.... :(
 
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It isn't easy getting a feral cat's total trust. It is fully aware that a tale can be used as a lure decoy to capture prey so, in its mind, it's weighing the risk of getting something to eat for the day or becoming dinner for the day.

You can hold out your hand to a cat and let it approach you and it might give it a sniff, stretching cautiously in order to no doubt if it does, but expecting its total trust and allowing you to pet it will take a lot of time if its even ever possible. I have a 17 yo feral, one left of three that I've been caring for since they were kittens. She watches for me and will run up and finally, after this long, even just now offer a small attempt of a mew toward me. But I sit there after placing her dish and purposefully turned my back to her (which shows you're trust for her) in a position as acting "look out" while she eats. I've often turned around and find that she is gone. And when she looks at me, I communicate to her in the totally relaxed 'slow blink, which is the Felinese for "I love you." I'm pretty sure she still hasn't been convinced of that just yet though. However, she's been behaving much like the other two did just before they passed on, coming close enough to my open door to investigate what's inside. But I have other animals that'd only end up stressing her if she were to come in. Otherwise, I'd have already taken her in by now. As it is, I'm bracing myself for the worst as winter approaches.
 
Yes, this is normal for a feral cat. I have been feeding a cat for a few years and have not been able to pet him. I do think he slow blinks sometime though.
 
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candycane7 said:
Hi,

I wonder is it "normal" for cats to basically be incalculable and to sometimes hish or even try to scratch or bite their owners?

I have been feeding a cat in the neighborhood treats for over 10 years. This cat knows me and she also knows that I don't do anything

to her and yet she sometimes hisses at me when I just try to pet her a bit and at times she even tried to bite!

In my opinion such a behavior is absolutely unacceptable. I take this personally.

There is NO reason at all for this cat to feel threatened by me.



I really wonder is this normal? Are all cats like this? Are there NO cats out there which "know" that it's not okay to try to scratch or bite

friendly humans who have been nothing but good to them? I don't even want to know how much I have spent for treats for this cat in

the past 10 years.... :(
Click to expand...
They could be feral from the day you first met. Born in the wild even. Or,abused by someone and then cast out.

They let you feed them because cats are survivors and opportunists.

They may hiss and try to bite when you try to touch them because in order of emotions, hissing first, which doesn't stop the advance of your hand, they then try to bite what's coming at them so to stop it.

Some ferals never allow contact.

Whatever you do, if you hope this cat will eventually warm to you, don't swat back if they try to bite you. Don't hit them. If you do that they will never let you near.

Feeding them is a kindness and a blessing. You're saving a life.
 
I feed 2 wild cats. One is nice and one hisses at me. Neither will let me pet them. I think the bad cat is the grown up version of a kitten I knew last year. It hissed at me as a kitten. I write it off to differences in personality or perhaps kittenhood trauma.
 
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Pemican said:
I feed 2 wild cats. One is nice and one hisses at me. Neither will let me pet them. I think the bad cat is the grown up version of a kitten I knew last year. It hissed at me as a kitten. I write it off to differences in personality or perhaps kittenhood trauma.
Click to expand...

i have had feral cats around that would let me pet them, as long as it was petting the back.

if i put my hand anywhere else, they were gone in a flash..:)
 
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candycane7 said:
Hi,

I wonder is it "normal" for cats to basically be incalculable and to sometimes hish or even try to scratch or bite their owners?

I have been feeding a cat in the neighborhood treats for over 10 years. This cat knows me and she also knows that I don't do anything

to her and yet she sometimes hisses at me when I just try to pet her a bit and at times she even tried to bite!

In my opinion such a behavior is absolutely unacceptable. I take this personally.

There is NO reason at all for this cat to feel threatened by me.



I really wonder is this normal? Are all cats like this? Are there NO cats out there which "know" that it's not okay to try to scratch or bite

friendly humans who have been nothing but good to them? I don't even want to know how much I have spent for treats for this cat in

the past 10 years.... :(
Click to expand...
Howdy and welcome to the forum.

Are you wanting to pet the cat for the cat's sake or for yours? Are you wanting to enjoy it or are you wanting the cat to enjoy it?

If it is for the cat's sake, let the cat decide what he wants. From his perspective a giant is offering food, but whenever he gets close enough to eat it the giant reaches for him, sometimes insistently. Also some cats just don't get into petting.

If you want a cat to be your friend, be present but not pushy. Don't stare at the cat intently. Read an article on your phone. Do your own thing, but in the cat's presence. Be available, but not insistent.

Or at least... That's how it usually works with cats I have known. Usually. Cats are individuals and sometimes nothing works.
 
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candycane7 said:
Hi,

I wonder is it "normal" for cats to basically be incalculable and to sometimes hish or even try to scratch or bite their owners?

I have been feeding a cat in the neighborhood treats for over 10 years. This cat knows me and she also knows that I don't do anything

to her and yet she sometimes hisses at me when I just try to pet her a bit and at times she even tried to bite!

In my opinion such a behavior is absolutely unacceptable. I take this personally.

There is NO reason at all for this cat to feel threatened by me.



I really wonder is this normal? Are all cats like this? Are there NO cats out there which "know" that it's not okay to try to scratch or bite

friendly humans who have been nothing but good to them? I don't even want to know how much I have spent for treats for this cat in

the past 10 years.... :(
Click to expand...

My mom used to have a dog that had experienced some pretty serious abuse before she got it. She brought it home and took care of it but it never did take to any humans, even after she had him many years. It would walk beside her, but if she reached out and tried to pet him, he bolted. I guess they just never get over some things.

I wouldn't take it personally. Wild cats are very unpredictable. I started feeding this wild cat once and it got very friendly, to the point I had to keep getting it off my lap. Then a few days later it wouldn't have anything to do with me, lol.
 
Lynx said:
Howdy and welcome to the forum.

Are you wanting to pet the cat for the cat's sake or for yours? Are you wanting to enjoy it or are you wanting the cat to enjoy it?

If it is for the cat's sake, let the cat decide what he wants. From his perspective a giant is offering food, but whenever he gets close enough to eat it the giant reaches for him, sometimes insistently. Also some cats just don't get into petting.

If you want a cat to be your friend, be present but not pushy. Don't stare at the cat intently. Read an article on your phone. Do your own thing, but in the cat's presence. Be available, but not insistent.

Or at least... That's how it usually works with cats I have known. Usually. Cats are individuals and sometimes nothing works.
Click to expand...
It has been my experience that ignoring a cat in his presence almost always guarantees his nose being placed squarely on mine. And I'm sure that I would make further progress with the feral Pearl, when I notice her lounging while she's aware of my presence but just out of reach of my reach, if I also sprawled out in similar fashion, with an increased possibility with my belly up. But then, the neighbors would be calling each other to the window. :LOL: Idk, I might try it still.
 
hi everyone,

no this is NOT a feral cat! maybe i should directly have made this clear, she is a house cat!!!

she has always been rather shy and i also accepted that. i wonder how she acts towards her owners.

i just think after such a long times of me feeding her she should know that i don't harm her and hissing at me

or even trying to bite is very offensive to me. i feel like this cat is only using me for food and doesn't really like me,

which upsets me. i feel abused by this cat.

when i think about it she really isn't a lovely cat. she doesn't do anything cute. other cats try to rub on your legs or

roll around on the ground, she does none of that!

i really wouldn't want to own a cat like this. i also don't think i'll give her any more treats, why should i? if she likes

me that little, then i also don't want to feed her anymore. there are other cats in the hood which i can focus on and

these cats are nicer.

i was really giving her a long time to build some trust but if she doesn't trust me after 10 years then she never will.

i'm really done with this cat.
 
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candycane7 said:
Hi,

I wonder is it "normal" for cats to basically be incalculable and to sometimes hish or even try to scratch or bite their owners?

I have been feeding a cat in the neighborhood treats for over 10 years. This cat knows me and she also knows that I don't do anything

to her and yet she sometimes hisses at me when I just try to pet her a bit and at times she even tried to bite!

In my opinion such a behavior is absolutely unacceptable. I take this personally.

There is NO reason at all for this cat to feel threatened by me.



I really wonder is this normal? Are all cats like this? Are there NO cats out there which "know" that it's not okay to try to scratch or bite

friendly humans who have been nothing but good to them? I don't even want to know how much I have spent for treats for this cat in

the past 10 years.... :(
Click to expand...
Cats r not human , so they don't behave like humans
. If some one bought u dinner would that mean they were automatically allowed to get into your personal space ? I think not .
We r much bigger than cats , small animals r very intimidated by larger ones . This cat has no idea what's going on in your mind , it just knows that u r bigger than it and u think u have the right to put your hands on it because u bought it dinner 🥴 . U can't expect to just do what u want with an animal , or a person 😆😆😆 just because u bought them dinner .
The best way to get a cats trust is to give without expecting to receive . U must always b extremely gentle and patient with animals and let them make the first move towards physical contact . If they don't make that first move u just have to accept that they don't trust u enough , they r afraid , it's as simple as that . This cat , if it's a wild one , is only tolerating u because it's starving and u r a source of food . U can continue to b kind to it and show it done compassion by feeding it but u mustn't expect anything in return . Just do it because u r a kind person .
 
Suze said:
. U can continue to b kind to it and show it done compassion by feeding it but u mustn't expect anything in return . Just do it because u r a kind person .
Click to expand...

But i have been giving this cat treats for over 10 years and she hisses at me and even tries to bite? I think this isn't normal.

I don't know what's wrong with her but this cannot be normal. I am really disappointed by this cat. I feel like she is only using me

and doesn't like me. I find this offensive.

There are other cats I have been feeding for a much shorter time and they are MUCH friendlier! They allow me to pet them while they're
eating and they also roll around on the floor and do all these cute cat things.

But this cat does none of that. She only looks at me with a look which makes me feel like she doesn't like me.
 
candycane7 said:
But i have been giving this cat treats for over 10 years and she hisses at me and even tries to bite? I think this isn't normal.

I don't know what's wrong with her but this cannot be normal. I am really disappointed by this cat. I feel like she is only using me

and doesn't like me. I find this offensive.

There are other cats I have been feeding for a much shorter time and they are MUCH friendlier! They allow me to pet them while they're
eating and they also roll around on the floor and do all these cute cat things.

But this cat does none of that. She only looks at me with a look which makes me feel like she doesn't like me.
Click to expand...
Maybe she doesn't 🤷 . It's your choice to b offended by her , she's not deliberately trying to offend u , she's just being herself , if u r suddenly offended after ten years ? Why , all of a sudden , does it bother u ? Be the bigger life form , forgive her and continue to b kind to her . What do u think Jesus would do in this situation ? I'm glad that God is not so easily offended by our ingratitude as u r by an animals 😜.
 
There is a cat colony near my home. Most of the friendly cats are very friendly, however those that have probably been abused from kittenhood sometimes are friendly enough to come around for treats and food, but that is as far as they are able to extend trust. This is many times due to mean people, not you, others.
 
I am not obligated to keep feeding a cat which acts hostile towards me.

I am not a huge cat petter anyway. I don't often try to pet a cat cause I fear being scratched.

But when I try it and then get such a reaction it offends me. It's like a slap in the face. I cannot just get over this

and act like everything is okay. Keep in mind this is a HOUSE CAT not a feral, abused, poor, traumatized, broke, troubled cat lol.
 
candycane7 said:
I am not obligated to keep feeding a cat which acts hostile towards me.

I am not a huge cat petter anyway. I don't often try to pet a cat cause I fear being scratched.

But when I try it and then get such a reaction it offends me. It's like a slap in the face. I cannot just get over this

and act like everything is okay. Keep in mind this is a HOUSE CAT not a feral, abused, poor, traumatized, broke, troubled cat lol.
Click to expand...
If it's a house cat is it in a house when u try to pet it ? Is it your friends house or a family members house ? Perhaps they know why their cat doesn't like u ? If u r not a huge cat petter why r u bothered that this one won't let u pet it ?
 
candycane7 said:
I am not obligated to keep feeding a cat which acts hostile towards me.

I am not a huge cat petter anyway. I don't often try to pet a cat cause I fear being scratched.

But when I try it and then get such a reaction it offends me. It's like a slap in the face. I cannot just get over this

and act like everything is okay. Keep in mind this is a HOUSE CAT not a feral, abused, poor, traumatized, broke, troubled cat lol.
Click to expand...
Of course u r not obligated , but u have been doing it for ten years so why stop now ?
 
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