Who is your confidant?

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love_comes_softly

love_comes_softly

Well-known member
#1
Feb 13, 2019
768
822
93
#1
Who is your confidant? Do you have one?

Is it a friend, a member of the church, a parent, sibling, spouse, boyfriend/girlfriend?

What makes them this go-to person? Has the person changed over time?

For you: Is it important or needed in your life to have this type of person?

Thanks for sharing!
 
Z

Zan

Member
#2
Mar 15, 2019
57
73
18
#2
My best friend is a guy who lives in Brazil that I've known for about 12 years since we started posting on a forum. He's the only friend I have that I wouldn't think twice about telling anything. I suppose the reason we keep in contact is we have very similar interests and struggles in life, so he's easy for me to identify with.

As far as family, I'm fairly close to my mother but there's a general air of keeping personal business to oneself... on the other hand they love to gossip incessantly, so I know any bit of information I feed to someone is going to be suddenly everyone's business.
 
CharliRenee

CharliRenee

Member
Staff member
#3
Nov 4, 2014
6,687
7,165
113
#3
Outside of my Lord...

Usually, it is my Mama or 2 of my friends from HS, or my local sister friend. I can tell those 4 just about anything and they also come to me. My daughters too, for the most part. I have confided in a couple online ppl who have really helped give me some fresh perspectives. To be honest, I am pretty open in general, have found that sharing or not doesn't change the truth only its power over you. Sometimes though, I have learned being too open to ppl who don't really care can leave one a mighty vulnerable to being hurt so I'm learning to be a bit more wise and circumspect. I am so honored when ppl open up to me, and I feel close to those who seem interested in my thoughts as well. Someone online recently gave me some really sound advice thar helped me over a hurdle. I believe it was a God thing. Those in my life who have been a safe place to go have been such an inspiration in my desire to be the same for them and others. Do I need it...well it helps for sure. Being a single gal, I have been intentional in cultivating friendships. When I get down in the dumps though, I can isolate but I support the value of connection. I do realize it is important to learn how to be alone to tend to the most important connection of all, the one with our Lord and Savior.

Thanks for asking, now it is your turn..

Do you have places or a place to go? How important is it to you?
 
posthuman

posthuman

Senior Member
#4
Jul 31, 2013
36,645
13,120
113
#4
I really have no one but God, no one at all.

And I'm fine with that :)
 
S

Stranger36147

Guest
#5
#5
My sister. I can trust her to keep a secret. She really is my best friend.
 
Didymous

Didymous

Senior Member
#6
Feb 22, 2018
5,047
2,099
113
#6
My best friend before I was a Christian is in prison for murder. We took different roads. Like Posthuman, God is my confidant. He already knows everything anyway.
 
Pipp

Pipp

Majestic Llamacorn
#8
Sep 17, 2013
5,536
2,702
113
Georgia
#8
A long distance friend I've known about 10 years. This friend helped me learn to open up about how I feel. :)
 
Demi777

Demi777

Senior Member
#9
Oct 13, 2014
6,877
1,949
113
Germany
#9
My best friend
Shes tough, smart and trustworthy. I can count on her no matter what

My sweety
Without his calm nature and being my safe place away from everything i wouldnt find peace. Hes the best

My mom
Shes the iron hand that again and again brings me up to fight and not bacj down

Without them I wouldnt be here today. I praise God for putting them in my life
 
zeroturbulence

zeroturbulence

Senior Member
#10
Aug 2, 2009
24,577
4,268
113
#10
Donuts are my confidant. I can tell them anything. And they always make me feel better.. :sneaky:
 
Lynx

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
#11
Aug 13, 2014
24,895
8,156
113
#11
I have a confidant, yes. Who is it?

Well...

That's the kind of thing I only tell my confidant. :cool:
 
blue_ladybug

blue_ladybug

Senior Member
#12
Feb 21, 2014
70,869
9,601
113
#12
For 46 years, my confidant was a hand-knitted teddy bear my mom made when I was a year old. I told Teddy all my secrets. Over the years, Teddy got old and raggedy; he's gone now-- I buried him with Tequila in 2016 when I had her put to sleep..
 
love_comes_softly

love_comes_softly

Well-known member
#13
Feb 13, 2019
768
822
93
#13
CharliRenee said:
Outside of my Lord...

Usually, it is my Mama or 2 of my friends from HS, or my local sister friend. I can tell those 4 just about anything and they also come to me. My daughters too, for the most part. I have confided in a couple online ppl who have really helped give me some fresh perspectives. To be honest, I am pretty open in general, have found that sharing or not doesn't change the truth only its power over you. Sometimes though, I have learned being too open to ppl who don't really care can leave one a mighty vulnerable to being hurt so I'm learning to be a bit more wise and circumspect. I am so honored when ppl open up to me, and I feel close to those who seem interested in my thoughts as well. Someone online recently gave me some really sound advice thar helped me over a hurdle. I believe it was a God thing. Those in my life who have been a safe place to go have been such an inspiration in my desire to be the same for them and others. Do I need it...well it helps for sure. Being a single gal, I have been intentional in cultivating friendships. When I get down in the dumps though, I can isolate but I support the value of connection. I do realize it is important to learn how to be alone to tend to the most important connection of all, the one with our Lord and Savior.

Thanks for asking, now it is your turn..

Do you have places or a place to go? How important is it to you?
Click to expand...
I love what you wrote about the two sides of being open or closed up. What a great way to put it: "sharing or not doesn't change the truth only its power over you". This will be one of those things I ponder.

I share with my mum or my sisters usually. We know each other very well and they are usually very good at centering me. We kind of all do that for each other.

When I'm dealing with something more personal or I'm not comfortable sharing with my family, I have a friend from college that I reach out to. She does the same. The Lord has really blessed our friendship throughout the years and I'm so thankful for it. The only hard part is that we are at different places in life, she is married with kiddos and lives states away.

I think relationships/connections and having someone to go to is important. It doesn't even have to be for major issues, just having someone to listen and give you perspective is important.
 
H

Hamarr

Guest
#15
#15
Hmmm my dog? 😛. I do have a few people in support groups I am pretty open with. I used to overshare a bit with everyone, but I have generally learned to tone that back with most people.
 
P

Poinsetta

Well-known member
#16
Nov 24, 2018
10,520
6,169
113
34
#16
Hamarr said:
Hmmm my dog? 😛. I do have a few people in support groups I am pretty open with. I used to overshare a bit with everyone, but I have generally learned to tone that back with most people.
Click to expand...
Same as same.
 
CharliRenee

CharliRenee

Member
Staff member
#17
Nov 4, 2014
6,687
7,165
113
#17
I totally agree with you about the value of connection. It is such a blessing that you two gfs have found each other. Even just laughing with a gal pal can be medicine. It is also nice that you are so tight with your family.

Hey thanks for the encouragement, nice thinking a thought I ponder is also being traveled by another.
 
Krumbeard

Krumbeard

Well-known member
#18
Apr 15, 2019
1,097
730
113
#18
love_comes_softly said:
Who is your confidant? Do you have one?

Is it a friend, a member of the church, a parent, sibling, spouse, boyfriend/girlfriend?

What makes them this go-to person? Has the person changed over time?

For you: Is it important or needed in your life to have this type of person?

Thanks for sharing!
Click to expand...
Interesting question.

Well first, those things I know about myself that I don't like to think about but must and much less even hear out loud I say to God.

Other things, not that personal, but maybe getting close I will talk to my parents. They are good for support and prayers.

If I need to get some true honest straight to the point blunt answers, my friend and his wife are good for that. Especially her. There's no beating about the bush. And certainly not if you ask her honest opinion.
 
cinder

cinder

Senior Member
#19
Mar 26, 2014
4,328
2,361
113
#19
Krumbeard said:
Interesting question.

Well first, those things I know about myself that I don't like to think about but must and much less even hear out loud I say to God.

Other things, not that personal, but maybe getting close I will talk to my parents. They are good for support and prayers.

If I need to get some true honest straight to the point blunt answers, my friend and his wife are good for that. Especially her. There's no beating about the bush. And certainly not if you ask her honest opinion.
Click to expand...
I think I'd like to meet this woman.
 
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