who's the boss?

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GaryA said:
Then the wife is wrong. Period. God says so.


The husband must always love his wife. And, what you are illustrating here that he is saying is a wrong attitude for him to take.


Did God not say "the two shall be one"...?

~

Lanolin,

God tells the husband "Love your wife." - anything he does that departs from that is sin to him.

God tells the wife "Respect your husband." - anything she does that departs from that is sin to her.

God tells the children "Obey your parents." - anything they do that departs from that is sin to them.

Whether he has a job, loses his job, gets a new job, or whatever else --- has no effect on any of this at all.

The way God wants us to conduct our relationships - the 'roles' he defined for us - are only dependent on one thing:

"God said."

It's actually really simple.

You have to trust God and do it His way...

~

If you are concerned about how your future husband will treat you --- then, make sure he is the right kind of man before you say "I do"...
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uh, easy for you to say, cos how do you even know, Most women think they have the right man when they marry and then it turns out they dont. You think they might check beforehand, but they too are just are told to trust them. even if they are christians.
 
Lanolin said:
Think of your own parents...who was the 'head' or boss in that marriage? Did it work? Men dont really like being told what to do, but then women dont either.
Thats human nature. why would women want to give up their autonomy? why do men feel the need to control women? Just doesnt seem like a good deal to me.
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Its weird because when i went out with my parents to places, my mum was the one that made the orders and gave input, but my dad always had the last say. The bible says Christ is the head, and the woman is the church. This implies that men should have the last say but be submissive to and care for their wives. Picture Christ and the church as a model of marriage and partnership. The woman is submissive but Christ serves the needs of the woman. Its a corny way of saying serve each other in marriage.
 
my mum gave orders but since she wasnt the one driving my dad drove her where she wanted to go, but he wouldnt drive her just anywhere all the time whenever she wanted. If he wanted to go anywhere he just went on his own without her.
But she seems to be the exception, however I get annoyed with women who dont drive, even if they dont own a car, its a skill you need to have in this day and age.
 
Lanolin said:
uh, easy for you to say, cos how do you even know, Most women think they have the right man when they marry and then it turns out they dont. You think they might check beforehand, but they too are just are told to trust them. even if they are christians.
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Do you really think that this is true? Is this your true perception?

You state it like you know it to be true. How do you know it to be true?

If it is true:

~ Are [most] women where you are just simply really bad judges of character? (Or, ...)

~ Are they just simply more interested in what worldly things they believe the man will give them? (Or, ...)

~ Are they just simply not concerned with the "long-haul" issues and eventualities of the marriage?

~ Do they have a "I will give this a go; if it doesn't work for me I will divorce him." mentality?

~ Are there simply no good men at all where you are? Are they all sorry-no-good rascals?

(And, I am talking about the Christian men where you are.)
 
in nz there is a man shortage as many have left the country to work overseas or australia. . we actually are a poor country.
There arent that many unmarried christian men where I am.
A lot of richer people do immigrate to nz but many are not christians.

as for the women, , I wasnt really around many of them when they married or had children but a lot of them live together because the man asks them to move in with them, maybe to save on rent. tHen only marry after when already with child.

It seems to me most women arent that great judges of character, cos when a man shows interest they just go with them doesnt really matter who they are. They say love is blind. I think women tend to overlook important stuff or maybe they get seduced. I think some women just cant afford to be choosy and think well its now or never. A lot of women just choose a man cos they are ready to have children and even if the man leaves wouldnt leave their child.

This is from my observations. Last week someone from my old church got married to this guy shes living with, shes been married before, but this new guy is so much older than her and while they were enaged they had like money issues cos at one point she was asking everyone for money on Facebook.
when she said she was marrying this man I tried to be happy for her but a lot of the church members when hearing the news were like what and were kinda pessismistic about it cos they had heard stories of how badly he was treating her.

the same with one of my friends, who has a son with her fiance, hes thirteen now, and they got married last month. (it was a church wedding) While being happy for them, when I told one of her former workmates she was marrying the guy the workmate asked really, cos she recalled how badly she was treated in the past and thought they had split up.

so many women are still prepared to marry someone who has treated them very badly, either theyve forgiven them or...they are completely overlooking things.
 
the 'i will divorce him' mentality isnt true
most women live with their partner before marrying, or if they decide to wait to marry are very trusting that their man is faithful, so when it doesnt turn it out that way it is a HUGE shock.

Most of the women I know that are separated or estranged, are because their husbands were unfaithful, and as it turns out, they are usually the very last to know. It is very sad.

I also know of those who married very young their parents arranged everything and marriage did not turn out like they expected.
 
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