Probably to answer the original questions in the post you would actually have to first believe that God does still commnicate in dreams. Im really the only one that would know personally that it was from God, due to the many personal signs, and confirmations. My question isnt whether it was God, I know it was, but was do you think that due to my life choices, that even though I am now it an awesome place and being prepared for my wife to come very shortly, that the person shown in my dream to be my wife could now be null and void and that she is not able to be my wife now and that the person that is about to enter my life will be another, according to Gods will.
I don't normally like writing (or reading) long posts, but I think I need to make an exception in this case. I hardly remember any of my dreams and I certainly haven't ever had any dreams or visions from God. "All" I have is the Word of God, but it seems that nobody has been in your situation before anyways so you won't get any "i know this from experience" answers anyways.
So, I'm going to work this kind of backwards by first looking at the end (of the Bible) and then looking back at the Old Testament.
The following are all of the instances I am aware of where people received a vision from God after Christ's resurrection:
Christ appeared to the disciples and others shortly after his resurrection(Evidence that he had conquered sin and death)
Saul (when he lost his sight and was saved).
Ananias (sent to heal Saul and "complete" his salvation).
Peter (abolition of the law)
Cornelius (command to help Peter spread his vision of the abolition of the law)
Paul (instructions on where to preach the gospel)*
Paul (reassuring that he was doing what God wanted)*
John (Revelations)
Of these, only one (Cornelius:Acts 10) was there no direct link between the vision and spreading the good news to the world. In Cornelius' case, there was still the link, it just wasn't directly revealed in the vision. Furthermore, only two (with the *) were dream visions. The rest happened during the day, often in the afternoon. So, if we stretch into the hypothetical, perhaps you, or this woman, were chosen by God to spread His word to many people(i'm not convinced). If so, the precedent shows that both parties involved in such an interaction were individually given visions and then came together (saul and ananias, peter and cornelius).
In my studying of the Bible, I've seen God's relationship with man change; with the most recent change occuring when Jesus conquered sin and death. Thus, the NT relationships between God and man seem to be most clearly and directly applicable to our current lives. Personally, I don't see any precedence in the NT of a vision or dream intended to create/develop a personal relationship. The God I see in the Bible doesn't do things the way you think He is.
Since you seem to want a somewhat hypothetical answer to your original question, I'll broaden my search in the Bible to include dreams and visions from the OT. In the interest of saving time, I'm only going to isolate a few specific examples, I realize that this won't be an exhaustive analysis but I'll give it my best shot.
Balaam - God appeared to Balaam and instructed him to do something. Balaam obeyed, but God knew how dangerous the thing he was doing was. So He appeared again, and repeated His original message.
Jonah - God commanded Jonah to preach in ninevah. Jonah tried to run the other direction and ended up immediately in a big fish belly
Abraham - God appeared to Abraham to help dissolve a kind of tricky situation. Abraham had slept with one of the servants of his wife. She became pregnant, but some animosity grew between Abraham's wife and the servant. After the servant fled and God appeared to her, God also appeared to Abraham and explained that God would give his wife (Sarah) a son even though she was really old.
In both Jonah and Balaam's, God re-appeared to them and very clearly and specifically said "Hey I already told you to do this, now go do it!" When God seemed to think it was important enough to give someone a vision, he also though it important enough to step in and prevent them from avoiding His will. They no longer had a choice "should I do this or not". It became "I must do this or die." In Jonah's case, God was acting as seen in the NT, He appeared in a vision to directly instruct Jonah where/how to spread God's word. In the case of Balaam, God seemed to be "threading the needle" and wanted to be certain that Balaam knew exactly what was expected of him.
With Abraham's vision, God had big plans for Sarah's eventual child. I chose this vision because it is one of few visions that seem highly personal and direct. However, in this case God had big plans for the child, and he made this clear in the vision.
In conclusion, I've been searching in both the OT and NT I can't find a vision of a future wife. I don't see any evidence that God would use a dream in the way you are claiming. Even if He does, we can see that when God thinks something is important enough to warrant a vision, he doesn't let any doubt remain. This all leads me inevitably to the dream not coming from God.
Some good points made. I know that some people dont believe that God would communicate about this kind of thing through dreams, but he does lol. He also interpreted it for me in an open vision, which pretty much seals it for me as being from Him. But like i said, the things that are personal between you and God dont need to be proven to you or approved of by others, God himself deals with us in a way that we know when our experience is genuine - this includes it being in line with Gods word.