yep...I'm actually asking this question :)

[Oncefallen]

I don't want to derail someone else's thread in the family forum, so I'm posting the question here. A male poster mentioned something a lot of women wonder about. We have our hypothesis, but I'd like to hear it straight. Maybe it's not even true, who knows...

Why is it that romance to a lot of guys means sex? What is romance to guys exactly?

This comes down to the basic differences between the genders, which is magnified by our culture in some ways reducing sex to nothing more than physical gratification. Women are more emotional creatures that desire to be emotionally fulfilled to engage sexually, whereas men are more physical creatures that desire to be sexually fulfilled to engage emotionally. Unfortunately for many men, romance has been reduced to the selfish fulfillment of their desire for sex without the first concern for their wife's desire for emotional engagement.

In my opinion, romance in a healthy relationship should involve the man taking the lead in emotionally engaging his wife to the best of his ability (this entails knowing what makes her feel loved and doing it) and not expecting that she reciprocate sexually on demand.

Sex should be the ultimate expression of a couple's love for each other not the fulfilling of our basest animalistic desires.

 

[Jullianna]

Romance is the process by which two souls communicate and intertwine. Sex is a wonderful exclamation point to it, but hardly necessary and sufficient for romance to blossom.

In many ways I think the misapplication of sex has helped kill romance. Sad days.

Ya hadda make me rep you again, huh?

 

[Ugly]

psssst..Ugly...that's one of the things that makes you A W E S O M E

*blush.. haha

Thanks Gre

 

[justinsxc]

i don't think this a very good thread to make conclusions. i'll be honest in my own experiences, the more i understand God and His love, the more i become more romantic(or like a woman, haha), which is pure, genuine love. i feel like understanding is key, so we can really appreciate the ability to love and make strives to love like Jesus is really an awesome privilege because that's the whole point, the beginning and the end for which was taught... to be manifested from the inside out with love by following our perfect teacher and God, Jesus Christ. the closer we get to Him the more romantic one becomes or that's how i've noticed, since i have been at the lows of lows deceiving women into something i'm not... that none of us. it's that ego i'm telling you, why else would we have to lose everything to gain everything? we won't ever understand perfect love, until we get home and see our Lord's face. We can always learn how to love and be loved though, so we can live above this life and bring hope back into the world.

 

[jkalyna]

This comes down to the basic differences between the genders, which is magnified by our culture in some ways reducing sex to nothing more than physical gratification. Women are more emotional creatures that desire to be emotionally fulfilled to engage sexually, whereas men are more physical creatures that desire to be sexually fulfilled to engage emotionally. Unfortunately for many men, romance has been reduced to the selfish fulfillment of their desire for sex without the first concern for their wife's desire for emotional engagement.

In my opinion, romance in a healthy relationship should involve the man taking the lead in emotionally engaging his wife to the best of his ability (this entails knowing what makes her feel loved and doing it) and not expecting that she reciprocate sexually on demand.

Sex should be the ultimate expression of a couple's love for each other not the fulfilling of our basest animalistic desires.

Making me blush Oncefallen

 

[Jullianna]

It makes sense that one cannot truly express or fully appreciate love for someone else without experiencing God's perfect love first.

 

[GreenNnice]

This comes down to the basic differences between the genders, which is magnified by our culture in some ways reducing sex to nothing more than physical gratification. Women are more emotional creatures that desire to be emotionally fulfilled to engage sexually, whereas men are more physical creatures that desire to be sexually fulfilled to engage emotionally. Unfortunately for many men, romance has been reduced to the selfish fulfillment of their desire for sex without the first concern for their wife's desire for emotional engagement.

In my opinion, romance in a healthy relationship should involve the man taking the lead in emotionally engaging his wife to the best of his ability (this entails knowing what makes her feel loved and doing it) and not expecting that she reciprocate sexually on demand.

Sex should be the ultimate expression of a couple's love for each other not the fulfilling of our basest animalistic desires.

Making me blush Oncefallen

Me too, and, my oh my, do I ever look good when I'm a total green head

----
Seriously, good stuff, onceFell, for practical letting girls understand their better opposites (just kiddie.g, miladies , you know me, green head and nice ) .

I would just add that God needs to be called on to emotionally understand how to understand the lady's emotions right. I know that is understood by most believers but I just wanted it understood for those that are not included in 'most.' .

And, the last sentence there of sex as a couple's ultimate expression of love for each other is what it should be, that is a beautiful union of the two marrieds' love for each other , which is thereby blessed because it is grounded in Christ's perfect Love for them as scripture .

Sex in marriage is not for self but for other and it must be done one for another , to please the other is to please God, you think?

I like the meaning, too, of these verses explaining the holy unifying effects of sex in marriage that also keeps the temptations by Satan out. 1 Cor. 7: 3-5