what scares you the MOST about getting married ?

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GreenNnice

Guest
because i like to go to parties but i dont know how to organize them and besides that, i dont know how to control many children together in the same place
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I see, lizzytheone, I see. Hmmmm, ok, I know not you but I know your sincerity and that being real is what children not only need they want. They see 'real' in you and they will respect you and you won't have to control them because they will be obeying you :)

The Lord leads our life, IF He does, and, we will do things we think quite frightful with yokeful ease.
 
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SpaceCowboy

Guest
Letting someone get close to me is terrifying.
 
Feb 10, 2008
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Maybe it sounds silly, but the thing that most scares me is the ceremony.
 
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Jordache

Guest
I married a gentle respectful man who ended up being abusive and turning his back on me, everyone he knew, his passions, and the Lord. I don't say this to scare anyone, but to encourage you that though my dream turned into a nightmare my God is still bigger.
What do I fear?
1. I fear my own blindness, so I plan on involving many people I'm my next relationship.
2. I fear that being truly honest with any man. I shared many things with my ex and now he's got them the use against me.
 
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Livi94

Guest
I fear that i keep disappionting God and all my loved ones in Heaven. I fear that my parents don't know how much i appreciate them. I fear that I might fail in my future...
 

phil36

Senior Member
Feb 12, 2009
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Being as Christlike as posible...Knowing my I will not always succeed.. But strive to be in Christs strength.

Phil
 
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GreenNnice

Guest
1 Corinthians 7: 32-33 state my most worrisome thoughts about getting married. This does not have to do with salvation, that is secured, but it does have to do with marrying for wrong reasons.

Once you are married, your desire is for your other person, 1 Cor. 7:33. You are no longer just focusing on the Lord in a singleness state. The last thing in the world we want to do in our life in Christ is feel bad for having married a girl that we KNEW we should not have married in the first place but lust/money/etc got the best of us. She will not make us better able to serve Him

The Lord leads . This marrying for wrong reason should not happen to those in the Spirt, the Spirit will convict when something done is not done according to His will for your life. :) Sure, you can smile again if you want, twice even .

:) :)
 
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adekruif

Guest
First and foremost...I worry about losing sight of Christ in the relationship, before or after getting married. It's happened to me before and I fear it will happen again.

Love IS powerful and when you are super close to somebody the potential to deeply hurt your spouse is great. Because of this power, I have a deathly fear of divorce.
 
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Ninotori

Guest
Divorce, I guess. The reality that it happens, and that it's pretty much a fruitless idea to assume that the person I marry will be infallible.

I'm more scared of never having a relationship though. I have so little confidence in myself and my worth to someone else. I dont even really know how to tell what I'm actually attracted to, I've spent so much of my life reminding myself ''oh he probably doesn't like you that way so dont bother''.

I am terrified to spend my life alone. People say you dont need to get married or have a husband to be happy, but that has been one of the biggest things I've wanted in my life ever. I want to have a family. I am terrified that I will have to face this whole life alone. Even with God to lean on, it still scares me. Being alone is hard. It's so hard.
 
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mariposa1

Guest
My fear is separating myself from God if my husband does not share the same belief as I do, or always arguing with my husband when he doesn't feel like going to church
 

mystdancer50

Senior Member
Feb 26, 2012
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Sexual intimacy, pregnancy and having children...yup...which is why I am content and willing to be single and embrace celibacy my entire life. :)
 

Liamson

Senior Member
Feb 3, 2010
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My worst fear is that I will marry someone that doesn't know me and does not have the capacity or will to want to get to know me. That I will just be someone to fill a position or for security or to bear them children.

I want an Epic Love. I'm not looking for a wife. I'm looking for THE Love of my life.
 
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GreenNnice

Guest
1 Peter 5:7 - Cast all your cares on Him, for He cares for you.

This is wonderful verse, instruction, God tells us that we are not to worry about things, to not have angst, or, anxiety, because He ANXIETIES for us.

That 'cap' word might seem a bit odd, but......

Think about it. It is an axiomatic relationship, same word, 'cares,' but with noun meaning the first usage and verb usage the 2nd. To me, this speaks of God's utter ability to usurp ALL our anxiety, our cares (anxieties, worries) are taken care of by Him, completely. He BURDENS all our anxieties. :)

We CAN give our marriage scares to Him and He 'cares' them right OUT of our thinking.

It is not good to have anxiety either, it causes 'divide' of ourselves, and, that can affect our Christian life walk. Our reasoning for scared of getting married is based on fears and that means we are not letting God be our ever-present help in times of our trouble, as Psalms 46:1 states.

'Trouble' can mean an actual physical situation but it also can be mental anguish that troubles us.

So, don't fear this marriage thinking, He does not want you too, for He knows it creates a divide between you and Him and, worse than that, or, compoundingly as bad, the Devil can then enter into our worrisome thoughts, causing our Christian life to suffer, greatly, as we (not God) decide we don't want to be intimate, we are afraid of being a pawn, we are afraid of their divorcing us, we think our beliefs will change, we think we will lose the Christlikeness of our singleness, we will marry for wrong reasons.

Cas t ALL ( not 'some') your cares upon Him, for He cares for you. This verse is speaking of a dynamic reciprocating relationship .

My Christ peeps, THESE scared of marriage thoughts rueing in your, and, my, mind are NOT placed by God. And, that means only the other power(Devil), who is infinitely weaker than His (God) power , is placing those defeating thoughts in your mind. Don't give the Devil an inroads to your thoughts, humbly turn over EVERY CARE YOU WANT TO CONTROL, for God will control your cares, there will be no reason for us to be scared :) And, consequently, this turning of your cares shows a humbleness to God. God says in scripture that IF we humble ourselves in His sight we will be lifted up. So, not only by humbly understanding He will take care of ALL our cares, He will lift us up, which means, to establish us with blessings and recognition and strength, as I understand that verse.

God cares, and, the Devil scares. Choose The One who cares. :)
 

mystdancer50

Senior Member
Feb 26, 2012
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I know my fears are not from God, yet they are very much real to me. It is, in truth, not something I ponder. It use to consume me once but God told me it all boils down to one simple question: how much do I trust Him?

I trust God with all of me, even my fears and reservations regarding marriage. So, I cast my cares on Him and walk the path He gives me to walk. I acknowledge what fears exist so that when He and I work through the underlying reasons for said fears, I do not resist Him or deny them. This way, we can truly deal with them in His timing. It is a moot point now since I am nowhere near marrying and I am truly content to be single. I know what God has said to me in regards to whether or not I will marry one day. All I know is that I trust Him and that I am truly grateful that He has revealed my fears to me. I would rather see them now than discover them while married. Just some more thoughts... :)
 
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GreenNnice

Guest
I know my fears are not from God, yet they are very much real to me. It is, in truth, not something I ponder. It use to consume me once but God told me it all boils down to one simple question: how much do I trust Him?

I trust God with all of me, even my fears and reservations regarding marriage. So, I cast my cares on Him and walk the path He gives me to walk. I acknowledge what fears exist so that when He and I work through the underlying reasons for said fears, I do not resist Him or deny them. This way, we can truly deal with them in His timing. It is a moot point now since I am nowhere near marrying and I am truly content to be single. I know what God has said to me in regards to whether or not I will marry one day. All I know is that I trust Him and that I am truly grateful that He has revealed my fears to me. I would rather see them now than discover them while married. Just some more thoughts... :)
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Nowards near marriage? Milady, it's fine to be trusting in God, not to mention, dandy :D , as trusting in God as The Spirit indwelling in you leads after having received Him, as scripture states we must do for getting spiritual gifts (1 Cor. 12), but, and, $orry to confuse, that was just the weird, richness of green braines taking over my thinkings, ALWAYS trying to spiritedly lead others :)

But, as I was saying, God is in whom we trust, that is good, just don't forget that when He knows you are trusing Him then that is the time He could lead you to trust that a 'him' is a good one to trust.

Just saying, the Lord leads, and, the establishment of trust in Him will, perhaps lead to God showing you a 'him' to trust in.

God has great plans for us all, be open to His change which can and will surface as we trust Him more, our faith will deepen, so will His work for us because He knows our power to bring glory to Him, which brings others to Christ. This is His perfect will for us, the doing of His things for us as He pleases for us to do, dancerofthemyst :)
 
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Liz01

Guest
That my husband be bored or upset in the relationship and i couldnt be able to notice it.
I almost never get bored and when i am talking with someone i usually enjoy it (im almost always thankful with God) , so its kind of scary to think that he could be bored while im having a good time and that i dont see it, thats maybe why im more attracted to confident men.
 
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GreenNnice

Guest
That my husband be bored or upset in the relationship and i couldnt be able to notice it.
I almost never get bored and when i am talking with someone i usually enjoy it (im almost always thankful with God) , so its kind of scary to think that he could be bored while im having a good time and that i dont see it, thats maybe why im more attracted to confident men.
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IF the guy's life IS rocked in the Chief Cornerstone, God lives in Him, and, he will always have the Spirit speak through any boredom of anything to do with anything, including you, milady.

You are so unboring to Him, lizzytheone, God LOVES every good word you say that gives glory and honor and praise to Him. And, a 'him,' in Him, can not help but feel that same 'unboring' way about you. :)
 
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YoungServant

Guest
i fear the commitment, i mean being with someone e-very sin-gle da, i mean geez, i'm afraid of the boredom
 
Feb 10, 2008
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You are with someone every single day already. Wouldn't one more make it less boring, not more boring?