I believe Jesus as a carpenter as a man, as a man who was tested, as a man who cryed out "why has though forsaken me?" He spoke of the one true God. (his cultures God) But Do you think that the God that is Love, is a vengeful entity? Jesus didn't think that, do you?
2Th 1:7-9
(7) And to you who are troubled rest with us, when the Lord Jesus shall be revealed from heaven with his mighty angels,
(8) In flaming fire taking vengeance on them that know not God, and that obey not the gospel of our Lord Jesus Christ:
(9) Who shall be punished with everlasting destruction from the presence of the Lord, and from the glory of his power.
Of course Jesus did think that! The actual vengeance and wrath that was due us through sin, Jesus took upon himself that wrath.
This is why a Christian loves Jesus. We know this by revelation from the scriptures God inspired, which helped make it possible for us to recognize Jesus when he actually did come.
It seems that you are really confused? But that makes sense seeing you said
you have a dilemma.
Jesus died for that Pain, but you must receive the full revelation of Christ
from the scriptures inspired of God to grow in Grace and Knowledge of Christ Jesus The Lord.
Isa 53:3-5
(3) He is despised and rejected of men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief: and we hid as it were our faces from him; he was despised, and we esteemed him not.
(4) Surely he hath borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows:
yet we did esteem him stricken, smitten of God, and afflicted.
(5) But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities:
the chastisement of our peace was upon him;
and with his stripes we are healed.
Isa 53:6-7
(6) All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned every one to his own way;
and the LORD hath laid on him the iniquity of us all.
(7) He was oppressed, and he was afflicted, yet he opened not his mouth:
he is brought as a lamb to the slaughter, and as a sheep before her shearers is dumb, so he openeth not his mouth.
Isa 53:8-9
(8) He was taken from prison and from judgment: and who shall declare his generation?
for he was cut off out of the land of the living: for the transgression of my people was he stricken.
(9) And he made his grave with the wicked, and with the rich in his death;
because he had done no violence, neither was any deceit in his mouth.
Isa 53:10-12
(10) Yet it pleased the LORD to bruise him;
he hath put him to grief: when thou shalt make his soul an offering for sin, he shall see his seed, he shall prolong his days, and the pleasure of the LORD shall prosper in his hand.
(11) He shall see of the travail of his soul, and shall be satisfied: by his knowledge shall my righteous servant justify many;
for he shall bear their iniquities.
(12) Therefore will I divide him a portion with the great, and he shall divide the spoil with the strong;
because he hath poured out his soul unto death: and he was numbered with the transgressors; and he bare the sin of many, and made intercession for the transgressors.
This is really saddening for me now having read these scriptures,
seeing clearly that you do not comprehend even the very first part of the Gospel. May God have mercy on you,
that the enmity you have against Him be not your ruin. The only power we have against the flesh, is through the power of the Spirit that Christ gives us.
Rom 8:5-9
(5) For they that are after the flesh do mind the things of the flesh; but they that are after the Spirit the things of the Spirit.
(6) For to be carnally minded is death; but to be spiritually minded is life and peace.
(7) Because the carnal mind is enmity against God:
for it is not subject to the law of God, neither indeed can be.
(8) So then they that are in the flesh cannot please God.
(9) But ye are not in the flesh, but in the Spirit, if so be that the Spirit of God dwell in you.
Now if any man have not the Spirit of Christ, he is none of his.
Sadly, the devil truly has deceived the whole world. We are only able to come out from that deception
through hope in the shed blood and resurrection of Christ as it is revealed from heaven and record in The Word of God.
Rev 12:9
And the great dragon was cast out,
that old serpent, called the Devil, and Satan, which deceives the whole world: he was cast out into the earth,
and his angels were cast out with him.
Rev 20:10
And the devil that deceived them was cast into the lake of fire and brimstone, where the beast and the false prophet are, and shall be tormented day and night for ever and ever.