Today, the world considers love to be something we do to make everyone feel good and accepted. To speak against something is called judgment and hate, but this is a worldly definition and mindset that was not taught by Christ. Yes, many churches are teaching this and pervert Matthew 7 which is a direct exhortation against hypocrisy, not all judgment.
Yes, homosexuality is a sin. So are all other sins. I see that people think that Christians spend too much time focusing on homosexuality when all sins lead to death. However, I also see that homosexuality is a topic always brought up to question Christians. Naturally, when people ask us about homosexuality, we will respond directly to homosexuality. So the fact that we focus on homosexuality is not necessarily a product of focus, but a product of the topic being brought up. Yes sin is sin. There is no mortal sin, venial sin, etc. All sin leads to death and as Christians that is the mind and judgment we operate in. The only sin that cannot be repented of is Blasphemy of the Holy Spirit, or attributing the works of the Holy Spirit to the enemy.
Let's take a look at Mark 12:29-32 NKJV
29 Jesus answered him, “The first of all the commandments is: ‘Hear, O Israel, the Lord our God, the Lord is one.30 And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength.’[e] This is the first commandment.[f] 31 And the second, like it, is this: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’[g] There is no other commandment greater than these.”
What is the love in this Scripture? Agapeo.
Agapeo love is a selfless love. It's a love where we give people what they spiritually need without thought of reciprocity or return. If we look at love in this definition, giving truth, what people spiritually need, IS agapeo love. We can give agapeo love to anyone.. saved or unsaved. This is the love that guides our relationships in life with anyone we encounter, from acquaintances, friends, family, brethren, you name it. We are asked to give agapeo love to all mankind.
This does NOT mean that we should blindly tolerate sin in anyone. It means we give them what they spiritually need, not what they want or think according to the natural mind and understanding.
God's love is given to us as well through everything He does. Remember, a natural father will correct, rebuke, and chasten their own children. God does this to us as well. In fact, the bible says that if we are without chastisement, we are illegitimate children. As this love may not feel good for the moment it does produce fruit! He prunes His branches, and when He cuts away that which displeases Him, it does not feel good to our flesh. The light of God exposes darkness and He wants us to remove that in our lives and allow Him to change us.
The bible says that we do not judge those outside the body because God judges them. We do judge those who are inside the body of Christ, not by heart motive as we cannot judge the heart, but we judge the actions, doctrine, beliefs, etc.
To love someone does not mean we have to agree with their lifestyle, ways, and sin. When it comes to homosexuality or ANY sin, to love someone will be to give them the truth and show them that there is a way out of that sin. We do have to show them that the sin they may be living in is not acceptable in the eyes of God. Granted our language should be seasoned when speaking to those outside the body, we cannot in any way accept or tell that person that it's OK to live in that lifestyle or continue on in that lifestyle. This includes brethren who may be living in sin as well.
Romans 1:28-32 NKJV
28 And even as they did not like to retain God in their knowledge, God gave them over to a debased mind, to do those things which are not fitting; 29 being filled with all unrighteousness, sexual immorality,[c] wickedness, covetousness, maliciousness; full of envy, murder, strife, deceit, evil-mindedness; they are whisperers, 30 backbiters, haters of God, violent, proud, boasters, inventors of evil things, disobedient to parents, 31 undiscerning, untrustworthy, unloving, unforgiving,[d] unmerciful; 32 who, knowing the righteous judgment of God, that those who practice such things are deserving of death, not only do the same but also approve of those who practice them.
This scripture speaks of the unrighteousness of mankind and God's judgment of those who are unrighteous. Lets take a look a the last verse 32. It says that those who know the righteous judgment of God and practice sin are deserving of death as well as those who approve of those who practice them.
This is a strict condemnation of the approval of sin. Approving of those who practice sin is tacit approval of that sin. What does this As Christians, it has been stated before that we are new creations. As we are born of light, we must walk in light. As we listen to the Holy Spirit and allow Him to guide our lives, we allow God to change us and are changed by God. Our ways no longer follow the former man, but become God's ways. We cannot as ambassadors of Christ be found in hypocrisy to the word of God and the guidance of the Holy Spirit.
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To stand against homosexuality is not homophobia. If we are following the ways of God, it is something He has asked us to do by standing against the ways of the world and sin. How do we approach the world and the topic of homosexuality? Well if we know that we cannot tolerate homosexuality and be found in hypocrisy, we do have to make a stand. Do we condemn those who are homosexuals? No. We bring them love by giving them the truth with words seasoned with salt. We understand that they are living in sin, but at the same time we cannot approve of their lifestyle and ways. This goes for all who live in sin.
We do have to be careful in our approach to those who are in sin. Testimony of how the Lord delivered us from sin, how sin no longer has power in our lives and how we continue to resist and stand against sin is one way to show them love. A lifestyle without hypocrisy allows the light of Christ in us to shine forth and draw people near. It is a very difficult and tricky sin to address, but in all of our evangelism we cannot in any way show tolerance of sin. The Holy Spirit will show us and give us the words to use if we listen to Him. He will show us who is ready to hear His truth and when to give seeds of truth.
As God prepares the ground in the hearts of those who are in the world, they will be more readily willing and able to listen to us give God's truth. Show them the good news of the gospel. Show them that in Christ there is no more death. Show them the beauty of our faith and how all mankind can escape the coming judgment and second death by believing in the one God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. Jesus Christ is the door that all mankind needs to enter to receive eternal life and live in His kingdom, and He has given His life for them already. All we need to do is accept this gift He has given us much like the wedding proposal of the Ketubah (ancient Jewish wedding ceremony). We count the costs, die to self, and die to the ways of the world. Accept His sacrifice by death and resurrection and we are reborn as the new man, born of God and light. God never promises us an easy path to take, but in the end, it's all worth it.