Poll: Are You a Quarrelsome Person?

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Are you a quarrelsome person, according to the description in Kevin's article?

  • Yes, and it is a dominant trait that I am concerned about.

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Yes, to some degree.

    Votes: 6 54.5%
  • No, I am never quarrelsome.

    Votes: 4 36.4%
  • I don't know.

    Votes: 1 9.1%

  • Total voters
    11

UnitedWithChrist

Well-known member
Aug 12, 2019
3,744
1,928
113
#1
This article comes from here:

https://www.thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/kevin-deyoung/distinguishing-marks-quarrelsome-person/


Distinguishing Marks of a Quarrelsome Peson
Kevin DeYoung

Quarrels don’t just happen. People make them happen.

Of course, there are honest disagreements and agree-to-disagree propositions, but that’s not what the Bible means by quarreling. Quarrels, at least in Proverbs, are unnecessary arguments, the kind that honorable men stay away from (Prov. 17:14; 20:3). And elders too (1 Tim. 3). These fights aren’t the product of a loving rebuke or a principled conviction. These quarrels arise because people are quarrelsome.

So what does a quarrelsome person look like? What are his (or her) distinguishing marks? Here are twelve possibilities.

You might be a quarrelsome person if . . .

1. You defend every conviction with the same degree of intensity. There are no secondary or tertiary issues. Everything is primary. You’ve never met a hill you wouldn’t die on.

2. You are quick to speak and slow to listen. You rarely ask questions and when you do it is to accuse or to continue prosecuting your case. You are not looking to learn, you are looking to defend, dominate, and destroy.

3. Your only model for ministry and faithfulness is the showdown with the prophets of Baal on Mount Carmel. Or the only Jesus you like is the Jesus who cleared the money changers from the temple. Those are real examples in Scripture. But the Bible is a book, and sarcasm and whips are not the normal method of personal engagement.

4. You are incapable of seeing nuances, and you do not believe in qualifying statements. Everything in life is black and white without any gray.

5. You never give the benefit of the doubt. You do not try to read arguments in context. You put the worst possible construct on other’s motives, and when there is a less flattering interpretation you go for that one.

6. You have no unarticulated opinions. Do people know what you think of everything? They shouldn’t. That’s why you have a journal or a prayer closet or a dog.

7. You are unable to sympathize with your opponents. You forget that sinners are also sufferers. You lose the ability to put yourself in someone else’s shoes.

8. Your first instinct is to criticize; your last instinct is to encourage. Quarrelsome people almost always see others in need of rebuke, rarely in need of refreshing.

9. You have a small grid, and everything fits in it. You view life through a tiny prism such that you already know what everything is about. Everything is a social justice issue. Everything relates to the regulative principle. Everything is Obama’s fault. Everything is about Trump. It’s all about the feminists. Or the patriarchy. Or how my parents messed up my life. When all you have is a hammer, the rest of the world looks like a nail.

10. You derive a sense of satisfaction and spiritual safety in feeling constantly rejected. We don’t want to blame the victim, but some people are constitutionally unable to exist except as a remnant. They must be persecuted. They must be maligned. They do not know how to live in peacetime, only in war.

11. You are always in the trenches with hand grenades strapped to your chest, never in the cafeteria with ice cream and ping pong. I remember years ago talking to a returning serviceman in my church who told me sheepishly that his job in Iraq was to drive an armed convoy for the ice cream truck. It was extremely dangerous, escorting the vehicle through bomb infested territory. This was brave, honorable work. And important: Even soldiers need ice cream once in a while. The amp doesn’t have to be cranked to 11 all the time. Seriousness about God is not the same as pathological seriousness about everything. Remember G. K. Chesterton: “We have to feel the universe at once as an ogre’s castle, to be stormed, and yet as our own cottage, to which we can return to at evening.”

12. You have never changed your mind. If you haven’t changed your mind on an important matter in several presidents, I wonder if you are a Christian or even alive. Of course, truth never changes, and neither should many of our convictions. But quarrelsome people stir up strife because, already knowing everything, they have no need to listen, learn, or ask questions.

Hit close to home? Look to Christ. He has the power to change us and has made provision to forgive. By the death of the Prince of Peace we can be at peace with God and at peace with one another.


Now, before some self righteous person retorts about my own personal behavior, I am ready to admit that I am a quarrelsome person on some topics.
For instance, I am very firmly convinced of God's sovereignty in salvation. amd so I am Reformed. I reject dispensationalism, and I believe that those who hold this position don't generally understand union with Christ and all that it means. I would categorize myself as a continuationist, but at the same time, I don't think that the vast majority of charismatics are well-balanced, nor do I think they have a correct understanding of "tongues", especially since many are coached in how to speak in "tongues" and it does not flow naturally. Nor do I think that God is obligated to use every single gift throughout all phases of church history. I am not a KJV Onlyist; I prefer the ESV or NASB or even the dreaded NIV over its archaic language and manuscript basis. I unequivocally reject anti-Trinitarians and those who deny the deity of Christ and substitutionary atonement/imputed righteousness and other core Christian doctrines like original sin and inspiration/authority of Scripture as mature Christians.

I am not confident that it is best to remain silent on some issues. Why? Because those who are opposing sound teaching will overwhelm the silent. However, at the same time, I realize that if a person really belongs to Christ, the Holy Spirit will be teaching him. He may be deceived for a while, but his education is the job of the Holy Spirit.

So, before you judge my behavior, consider yourselves because I know that many of my critics are simply promoting their own doctrines, which is easy to do in some cases, since it is the majority opinion. But, for your information, my poll choice will be one of the first two, so I don't fail to see my issues. Do you?

By the way, as a member of a Judaizer cult, I know for sure that a dominant characteristic of many cultists (and especially their leaders) is to be quarrelsome.

Time for a reality check, folks.
 

ArtsieSteph

Senior Member
Apr 1, 2014
6,194
1,313
113
30
Arizona
#2
I have a couple of those tendencies but thankfully not all. But I know for certain I’m stubborn. I’m quick to speak and quick to defend my case, sometimes quick o criticize. An odd thing about me too is the grid thing kinda fits too, but maybe not in the way you think. I’d stuff is in the air and I don’t have an answer for something, it makes me panic and I try to look for answers.
 
Jul 20, 2019
1,228
879
113
#3
One thing I do, is always defend true christianity and the word of God. The Holy Spirit and instincts kick in, and I am compelled to speak my mind, prosperity theology is one I detest, misquoted scripture, people who are only here to divide, and talk about sex, muslims etc.
 
Apr 5, 2020
2,273
449
83
#4
I definitely am a hater of man's idealisms. The Bible has given us every phrase we need to live by, and yet, to prove a point, many will take several scriptures and then create a catch phrase based upon that. That literally irritates me. Ultimately, it becomes a personal Gospel, and not the Gospel inspired from God!


SAME ESSENCE:

People say, the Father and Son are of the same ESSENCE:



What does the Bible say about ESSENCE?

You searched for
"ESSENCE" in the KJV Bible

'ESSENCE' in the Bible
... No direct matches for your keyword exist in the King James Bible.
^
No direct matches for ESSENCE! So, why do preachers use a term that technically is not Biblically Inspired by the Holy Spirit?




To make the correct "ESSENCE" claim you want and be correct according to Scripture, you can easily do it according to how it was inspired by the Holy Spirit:

EXPRESS IMAGE:
Hebrews 1:3

From the Greek:
3 ὃς ὢν ἀπαύγασμα τῆς δόξης καὶ χαρακτὴρ τῆς ὑποστάσεως αὐτοῦ, φέρων τε τὰ πάντα τῷ ῥήματι τῆς δυνάμεως αὐτοῦ, καθαρισμὸν τῶν ἁμαρτιῶν ποιησάμενος ἐκάθισεν ἐν δεξιᾷ τῆς μεγαλωσύνης ἐν ὑψηλοῖς,

3 Who, being the Effulgence of His glory and Express Image of His assumption, besides carrying on all by His powerful declaration, making a cleansing of sins, is seated at the right hand of the Majesty in the heights;"




I wonder, by teaching people what the Bible does not correctly and specifically state, if God holds them accountable for changing the literal Word of God?
 

UnitedWithChrist

Well-known member
Aug 12, 2019
3,744
1,928
113
#6
I think all Christians would consider all these points to be core Christian concepts, and would not seriously entertain thier rejection, with the possible exception of younger believers who are not properly instructed yet:

1) The full deity and humanity of Jesus Christ (Jesus is God and glorified man)
2) monotheism or the belief in one God
3) the doctrine of the Trinity
4) justification by grace alone through faith alone in Jesus Christ alone
5) the inspiration and sole authority of Scripture as the rule of faith
6) substitutionary atonement of Jesus Christ on the cross (Jesus died in the place of the believer)
7) original sin
8) virgin birth of Jesus
9) bodily resurrection of Jesus
10) eternal reward of the righteous and eternal punishment of the unrighteous

And, I wouldn't consider it to be "quarrelsome" to challenge anyone who claims otherwise.

Let's not get wild here and think that we need to be so open minded that our brains fall out.
 

Tinkerbell725

Senior Member
Jul 19, 2014
4,151
1,127
113
Philippines Age 40
#8
Is there an option in the poll like: if you pick a fight with me, I will destroy you! :LOL:


It depends. Generally, I will avoid a fight. But you can't really avoid every fight in your life, specially if jerks are everywhere. Sorry for not reading the article yet.

Prov 20:3

Avoiding a fight is a mark of honor; only fools insist on quarreling.
 

Chester

Senior Member
May 23, 2016
3,876
1,172
113
#9
I think all Christians would consider all these points to be core Christian concepts, and would not seriously entertain thier rejection, with the possible exception of younger believers who are not properly instructed yet:

1) The full deity and humanity of Jesus Christ (Jesus is God and glorified man)
2) monotheism or the belief in one God
3) the doctrine of the Trinity
4) justification by grace alone through faith alone in Jesus Christ alone
5) the inspiration and sole authority of Scripture as the rule of faith
6) substitutionary atonement of Jesus Christ on the cross (Jesus died in the place of the believer)
7) original sin
8) virgin birth of Jesus
9) bodily resurrection of Jesus
10) eternal reward of the righteous and eternal punishment of the unrighteous

And, I wouldn't consider it to be "quarrelsome" to challenge anyone who claims otherwise.

Let's not get wild here and think that we need to be so open minded that our brains fall out.
#4 - It should be - "justification by grace through faith in Jesus Christ"
#7 - original sin? - Depends what you mean? If you mean what the Bible teaches then I agree!

My quarrelsome streak! ;)
Trying to slip a bit of Calvinism into a "core Christian concepts" list! And then adding: "with the possible exception of younger believers who are not properly instructed yet:" !! Sure sounds like you are pickin for a fight! LOL!
 

Dino246

Senior Member
Jun 30, 2015
19,325
10,617
113
#12
The thread title strikes me as a baited question. There is no way to answer it without incriminating yourself, whether directly or by implication of denial.
 

Chester

Senior Member
May 23, 2016
3,876
1,172
113
#13
The thread title strikes me as a baited question. There is no way to answer it without incriminating yourself, whether directly or by implication of denial.
And even by what you wrote you indicted yourself as a person who sees conflict everywhere! Come on, trust people! LOL! :rolleyes:
 

p_rehbein

Senior Member
Sep 4, 2013
28,147
5,308
113
#14
It depends.

For those who agree with me and recognize my genius, I am quite a nice, friendly person

For those who fail to recognize my genius, and that I am NEVER wrong, I would probably be considered a very quarrelsome person............see, it's like this:

Those who THINK they know everything really, really bug those of us who DO know everything!

justsaying.png
 
Apr 5, 2020
2,273
449
83
#16
I think all Christians would consider all these points to be core Christian concepts, and would not seriously entertain thier rejection, with the possible exception of younger believers who are not properly instructed yet:

1) The full deity and humanity of Jesus Christ (Jesus is God and glorified man)
2) monotheism or the belief in one God
3) the doctrine of the Trinity
4) justification by grace alone through faith alone in Jesus Christ alone
5) the inspiration and sole authority of Scripture as the rule of faith
6) substitutionary atonement of Jesus Christ on the cross (Jesus died in the place of the believer)
7) original sin
8) virgin birth of Jesus
9) bodily resurrection of Jesus
10) eternal reward of the righteous and eternal punishment of the unrighteous


What if the trinity doctrine is based off terms that man has intelligently coined, but nowhere to be found within scripture?

(Same) Essence
God the Son
God the Holy Spirit
Trinity (just call it the Godhead)
co-equal
Persons
co-existence
Creed
Triune
Three in One


You searched for
"SAME ESSENCE" in the KJV Bible

'SAME ESSENCE' in the Bible
... No direct matches for your keyword exist in the King James Bible.


You searched for
"GOD THE SON" in the KJV Bible

'GOD THE SON' in the Bible
... No direct matches for your keyword exist in the King James Bible.


You searched for
"GOD THE HOLY SPIRIT" in the KJV Bible

'GOD THE HOLY SPIRIT' in the Bible
... No direct matches for your keyword exist in the King James Bible.


You searched for
"TRINITY" in the KJV Bible

'TRINITY' in the Bible
... No direct matches for your keyword exist in the King James Bible.


You searched for
"CO EQUAL" in the KJV Bible

'CO EQUAL' in the Bible
... No direct matches for your keyword exist in the King James Bible.


You searched for
"CO EXISTENCE" in the KJV Bible

'CO EXISTENCE' in the Bible
... No direct matches for your keyword exist in the King James Bible.


You searched for
"CREED" in the KJV Bible

'CREED' in the Bible
... No direct matches for your keyword exist in the King James Bible.


You searched for
"TRIUNE" in the KJV Bible

'TRIUNE' in the Bible
... No direct matches for your keyword exist in the King James Bible.


You searched for
"THREE IN ONE" in the KJV Bible

'THREE IN ONE' in the Bible
... No direct matches for your keyword exist in the King James Bible.


You searched for
"PERSONS OF GOD" in the KJV Bible

'PERSONS OF GOD' in the Bible
... No direct matches for your keyword exist in the King James Bible.




When you break down the literal language representing the Doctrine of the Trinity, you can see why people don't buy it.
If we went by what IS IN THE BIBLE VS WHAT IS NOT concerning the Trinity Doctrine, we can see why many believe it is a false man made Doctrine.

Much of why I believe the Trinity from the Church Fathers viewpoint, not today's modern version, because it is literally hear/say from man's viewpoint.
 
Apr 5, 2020
2,273
449
83
#17
^ That is my quarrelsome side coming out to shine :(
 
E

EleventhHour

Guest
#18
I am hoping to become one.... can we add that to the list?
 
Jan 17, 2020
4,792
733
113
#20
I definitely am a hater of man's idealisms. The Bible has given us every phrase we need to live by, and yet, to prove a point, many will take several scriptures and then create a catch phrase based upon that. That literally irritates me. Ultimately, it becomes a personal Gospel, and not the Gospel inspired from God!


SAME ESSENCE:

People say, the Father and Son are of the same ESSENCE:



What does the Bible say about ESSENCE?

You searched for
"ESSENCE" in the KJV Bible

'ESSENCE' in the Bible
... No direct matches for your keyword exist in the King James Bible.
^
No direct matches for ESSENCE! So, why do preachers use a term that technically is not Biblically Inspired by the Holy Spirit?




To make the correct "ESSENCE" claim you want and be correct according to Scripture, you can easily do it according to how it was inspired by the Holy Spirit:

EXPRESS IMAGE:
Hebrews 1:3


From the Greek:
3 ὃς ὢν ἀπαύγασμα τῆς δόξης καὶ χαρακτὴρ τῆς ὑποστάσεως αὐτοῦ, φέρων τε τὰ πάντα τῷ ῥήματι τῆς δυνάμεως αὐτοῦ, καθαρισμὸν τῶν ἁμαρτιῶν ποιησάμενος ἐκάθισεν ἐν δεξιᾷ τῆς μεγαλωσύνης ἐν ὑψηλοῖς,


3 Who, being the Effulgence of His glory and Express Image of His assumption, besides carrying on all by His powerful declaration, making a cleansing of sins, is seated at the right hand of the Majesty in the heights;"




I wonder, by teaching people what the Bible does not correctly and specifically state, if God holds them accountable for changing the literal Word of God?
Trinity is not in the bible either. But we use it and essence to communicate truth in a way people can understand.