I believe in a relationship with my saviour that is continual. I don't believe that my salvation is based on one choice I made in the past. A strong relationship will not draw back, it will result in salvation.
But I do not see it in Black and white like you. You have osas lenses on your eyes which makes everything appear in that extreme. Black and white.
A strong relationship can deteriorate slowly over time resulting in a weak relationship. A weak relationship that draws back to perdition.
"If"
If we endure to the end
If we maintain a strong relationship
If we walk in the Spirit.
We will be saved.
I know there were days when my relationship was weaker and days when it is stronger.. it is a continual fight.
Moment by moment..
It isn't black and white. Once saved always saved doesn't work.
I'm not talking about justification.
I'm talking about the relationship and faith that leads to justification.
I like to think there is more that I can do to have a stronger relationship with my saviour. Jesus has done, and is doing everything to have the strongest relationship with me. My choices are the determining factors each day.
It's an endurance race that isn't over till its over.
A genuine, intimate relationship with Jesus Christ is continual and begins based on our past decision (with ongoing present results) to trust in Him as the ALL-sufficient means of our salvation. (Romans 1:16; 1 Corinthians 15:1-4)
John 17:3 - And
this is eternal life, that they may
know You, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom You have sent (which is an intimate, experiential knowledge, found only in a relationship). The term "know" implies intimate, experiential knowledge, through a relationship with Him and not merely theoretical knowledge.
Now although born again Christians start off as babes in Christ and over time grow to maturity, we have our weak moments along the way. The apostle Peter had his weak moments and even denied knowing Christ three times, but ultimately, his faith did not fail and Jesus had a lot to do with that. Unlike Judas Iscariot who ultimately betrayed Jesus and his true colors were exposed by Jesus who knew his heart. (John 6:64-71; 13:10-11)
Ultimately, you seem to have more faith in self preservation than you do in God's preservation. (Psalm 37:28; 1 Corinthians 1:8; Ephesians 1:13-14; Peter 1:5; Jude 1) I'm just the opposite. IF is a confirmation and is not salvation by works at the back door.