ArtsieSteph's dad's cancer superthread

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blue_ladybug

Senior Member
Feb 21, 2014
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May be, or definitely is?

A stay in the psych ward isn't going to change his mindset of thinking he's not a Christian anymore.
 
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pottersclay

Guest
Steph I know that you know that your dad is a child of God. Christianity does not expire like a membership to a health spa.
Does your dad stop being a father or husband because there's a lack of responsibility and relationship due to health reasons? Certainly not.
Jesus is faithful even when we fail or think we failed. That's what it is all about. Praise God he's made that provision or all of us would be "up the creek without a paddle" sorta speak.
You tell my brother from me that if he feels a void in his relationship with God that he couldn't be more closer than where he is.
O how our spirit cries out abba and we want more. How we moan and groan in our spirit to draw closer. That is supernatural in itself.
Tell my brother from me the Lord is well aware and is in complete control and is very confident in his ability.
These things that he wrestles with are from the natural man very real but very common. His mind and body has been through a lot. Rest and know that he is.
As always my prayers are for you and yours.....o my gosh I've been there. I had my doctor call me because thinking I'd do harm to myself. I told her straight out if there was no god I'd be all ready gone by my own hand. Don't worry I told her . She asked if I wanted to speak to a professional, I told her that I am but he seems to not be listening. Then the Lord spoke to me and reminded me of the story when Jesus said everyone left him and Jesus turned to the apostles and said "will you leave me too? Their response filled my heart "I have no place to go" you are the bread of life my salvation, your words are life. I said this out loud.....you love me...you died for me .....you care for me.....you love me....over and over again pounding my fist on the table....alot of tears that day...first of frustration then of joy......because now I can say in full confidence....as John says in his gospel
The one that Jesus loved.......praise God.
The Lord will bring you at the end of your rope and forbid you to tie a knot....just to show you he has you in his hands always.

Loving ya

Potter.
 
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pottersclay

Guest
Steph not saying that your dad should not go and seek help but what I shared may give you insite to the situation. Seeking help does not mean he's a weaker vessle by any means.....the Lord even placed a angel in the garden where Jesus prayed the nite before to keep him company.
The Lord said in Genesis....it is not good for man to be alone.
Let my brother know he's not alone....I've been there...Christ is there.....it's all good.

Potter.
 
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Miri

Guest
Figured I’d switch back to this thread since things are more clinical right now. So far dad was having huge difficulties concentrating, circular thoughts, slightly suicidal tendencies that he did once or twice on a whim, and so we took him to the ER. Turns out he has a big infection in the fluid accumulating in his stomach, and that may account for the sudden behavioral changes.

He also may be very depressed. He has been making some statements to the doctor shrinksbthat apparently have been concerning so they may admit him to a psychiatric hospital....

Hi steph just to say that when my aunt gets infections, sick etc. It causes massive changes
in her behaviour and thinking. She gets confused, shouty, rather unpleasant to be with.

She also has vivid dreams and wakes up thinking they are real for hours after, very grumpy.
Depressed, blames everyone (Well me) for everything etc. She also hallucinates.

She is 82 now and every time it’s happened over the last 5 years, medical staff have
instantly thought she had dementia. Every time they have been proved wrong when
things have eventually settled down.

Even once the infection has gone it’s taken in some cases, weeks in others months
for things to settle down.

Recently she was in hosp for 10 days with suspected sepsis. The day she went in she was
coherent, then they put her on IV antibiotics for 6 days then powerful antibiotic
tablets which she later came home with. But a week at home she still had signs of
infection so she’s just coming to an end of the second course of anti biotics now.

Shes been home for 2 weeks now and is only just starting to show signs of the confusion
clearing up. But we are still having “out of your mind” strange stuff happening.

Its normal for ill people to feel depressed, especially when they are facing cancer.
Some of my friends have had cancer.

Its normal for people with infections to go a bit crazy, as infections change blood and
brain chemistry. By the way it’s also normal for people on very strong pain killers
like morphine to be affected mentally as well.

Its not that they are going mentally crazy, it’s a clinical physical issue. Any self
respecting psych doctor will know that and to be honest, the last thing a medically
sick person needs, is a psych ward as they probably won’t get the correct medical
attention they need. Maybe a medical ward would be better if anything as they can
monitor the levels of infection in the blood stream.

Over the years I’ve had to beg and plead with doctors to treat my aunt as a
physically sick person and treat the source of confusion, rather than a mental patient!
If they hadn’t done then she would have passed away by now as every time there has
been a medical issue to address. Severe confusion, sleepyness everyone though she was
just old. It turned out she had COPD and low oxygen levels. She is now on oxygen 24/7.

Severe confusin, aggressiveness, they thought she had dementia. Turned out to be a UTI
caused by a hospital bladder cathator.

Out of her mind on another planet, hallucinations. Turned out to be due to infection,
and subsequent reaction and delerium due to antibiotics.

Tiredness and sleepyness again, turned out to be dangerously high potassium levels,
caused by her medications.

Im not saying your dad has all these medical problems by the way they are just examples
of how physical problems affect you mentally.

At most he might need Counsilling due to the cancer. There might be things he can tell
another person and share with them that he can’t speak to family about for example.

Or to see if he is having a reaction to the treatments, he may need a medical opinion.
Also look up the side effects of infections and the treatments he is having. I’m sure
immunology has known side effects which is why they use it as a last resort rather
than a first resort.

Oh and he wont lose his salvation just because he is too sick to think properly, too depressed,
too tired to get his thoughts together and think things through properly. God is too
gracious for that, He knows our strength and weaknesses.

Hope this gives you some encouragement.

I know how upsetting it is seeing a person you care about being so ill and be so
bad tempered, depressed, take it out on you even. But it’s not them it really is
the illness talking and they don’t really mean it.

It does take some getting use to though and it can be very upsetting to see.

Will be praying for you.
 

ArtsieSteph

Senior Member
Apr 1, 2014
6,194
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Arizona
Currently he has to an accumulation of liquid that’s in his abdomen and his body. Before it was in his stomach only, and now it’s going to other parts of his body such as his wrists, ankles, even a bit outside his lungs. He has to not drink any more than 2000mls of liquid a day and also his nutrition shakes.

And thets not evem counting the possibility of the psychiatric hospital he may be going’s to, and possibly he may have to go to a facility that has hospital stuff as well as psyche stuff and that may take a while for him to get bed for...
 

blue_ladybug

Senior Member
Feb 21, 2014
70,869
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Steph, the 2000 mls a day, would include his nutrition shakes. I sometimes drink half in the morning, and half at night. Could he do that?
 

blue_ladybug

Senior Member
Feb 21, 2014
70,869
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What does he take for a nutrition drink? Look on the label, it should tell you how many ml's are in it.
 
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Miri

Guest
Currently he has to an accumulation of liquid that’s in his abdomen and his body. Before it was in his stomach only, and now it’s going to other parts of his body such as his wrists, ankles, even a bit outside his lungs. He has to not drink any more than 2000mls of liquid a day and also his nutrition shakes.

And thets not evem counting the possibility of the psychiatric hospital he may be going’s to, and possibly he may have to go to a facility that has hospital stuff as well as psyche stuff and that may take a while for him to get bed for...

Did they say what the reason was for that, the fluid.

Just asking as my aunt has the same, fluid on ankles, creeping up one leg,
around one lung (between lung and lining). In her case it’s because of her heart
not working as efficiently as it should any more, so it struggles to pump all
the fluids around her body so they accumulate in other tissues.

She’s had it for a few years now and also has to take diuretics in the morning to
assist with this and make the kidneys work harder. So she goes to the loo more.

In her case it’s a side affect of the COPD and the strain it has put on her heart.
 
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Miri

Guest
Hi Steph just wanted to say as well that
I think infections can make the heart work
harder which can cause fluid build up as well.

Have a chat with Pilkington in the veranda group
it might help a bit to know more information. I’m
sure she won’t mind
 
D

Depleted

Guest
Hi Steph just wanted to say as well that
I think infections can make the heart work
harder which can cause fluid build up as well.

Have a chat with Pilkington in the veranda group
it might help a bit to know more information. I’m
sure she won’t mind
Ummm, Miri, The Veranda is a by-invite group.

BUT, Steph, if you'd like to join us, you're more than welcome. We've been worrying with you and your family for the last couple of days. I'm not very knowledgeable about how infections affect the mind, but knew Miri was, and some others, so asked for the gals who knew about such things to come here and talk to you. That sprang a longer conversation on there then here, so if you are interested, just PM and I'll send you the invite. Only reason I haven't invited you yet was because I figured you'd get your support from Blain and your family, and with all your going through, didn't wanted to add to your time commitment.

Just PM me if interested, and no harm, no foul if you're not.
 
D

Depleted

Guest
As for fluid build-up in the body, that I do know a little bit about. Enough to know that doctors better get to the cause, or diuretics and withholding fluids can cause other kinds of harm. They withheld fluids with John on and off again, and he was getting to the point of kidney problems because of it, but they didn't bother figuring out which fluids were collecting in his body. Ends up it was blood, because he was on four blood thinners for something he didn't even have. (AFIB. A mistaken note they added to his file.)

Might want to have a thorough talk with your Dad's doctor. (With your mom too, of course.) Lots of times, when I asked questions, they'd explain it and I didn't have a clue what they were talking about. (Just wanted to warn you if that happens. They really do talk in words most people can't understand. lol) But, sometimes they'd tell me stuff that happened to John and I'd correct them, by telling them it didn't happen. Minor argument, (because they're sure based on notes, and I'm sure based on being married to him for 30+ years lol), and finally they got to the point of hearing me.

(No, he did NOT have a bypass in 1985. He never had any bypasses. And no, he doesn't have AFIB now. He had AFIB for 13 hours once in the ICU, but he doesn't still have it.)

Sometimes doctors work with notes on a chart that simply should have never be put on that chart to begin with. So find out why your Dad is building fluids, if you can. Because if they don't know why, they had better figure it out. And, if they think they know why, telling you helps you to know if they're mixing him up with another patient.
 

blue_ladybug

Senior Member
Feb 21, 2014
70,869
9,601
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Diuretics will make him pee like a racehorse.. lol