Homosexual Brother In Law

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MatthewWestfieldUK

Well-known member
May 13, 2021
871
498
63
#21
Noted. And if I’m being honest about myself I am and always have been the “nice guy” who doesn’t say much. Generally agreeable and Probably Tiptoed around people’s feelings most of my life and regrettably probably to my detriment. I’m introverted naturally in my personality so confrontation is really not my strength. it’s kind of a double whammy to me getting put in this situation. maybe that’s God speaking that it’s time to stand firm perhaps?
Firm can often speak softly
 
T

tstumf

Guest
#22
Thankyou everyone for your input. I’m really trying to put Proverbs 27:17 into practice in my overall life and trusting God more rather than leaning on my own understanding in these complicated matters. Thankyou again for shepherding me on this.
 
Oct 10, 2020
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#23
Hello there. I have myself quite a situation. My wife’s brother is a Homosexual and recently got “married” to his partner in California. The ceremony was private due to covid but now that the restrictions are gone they want to have a larger reception in October and want us there. I’m torn on this cause they are nice people but there is something telling me not to go. I have this feeling that I would be engaging in celebration of someone’s sin which I’m very against. It also concerns me about the example I’m setting for my 5 year old boy. He would be watching daddy compromise his beliefs and watching daddy essentially celebrate sin. Am I thinking on this the wrong way as a Christian man, husband and father? If I stand against this lead my family as God intended and refuse to attend it will absolutely make family members very angry and disappointed in me. It’s probably going to add stress to an already weak marriage of mine cause my wife believes she needs to be there for her brother. This isn’t the first issue we have had regarding the Homosexual brother in law. My wife’s family is also pushing us to allow the Homosexual couple to be my sons legal guardian/ godparents if we were to pass on. My wife thinks it’s a great idea but I’m not ok with this because I believe that as a father I have the duty to give my son the best chance at living in a Christian household with a strong masculine husband and wife marriage. I have a brother who is married but my wife doesn’t get along with them. She has a sister with a husband but she has that one out of the question as well. I’m trying to get out ahead of this before it becomes all a big train wreck but I keep stumbling. Please help. How do I lead my family through this mess? If nothing else please pray for us.
ask yourself if God is going to kill your wifes brother. For reference where man
will kill sinner. God says i will love the sinner until he is good, i will nt kill him.
 
T

tstumf

Guest
#25
ask yourself if God is going to kill your wifes brother. For reference where man
will kill sinner. God says i will love the sinner until he is good, i will nt kill him.
Ow I don’t hate the guy. I love him undoubtedly. But is it appropriate to use tough love whereby refusing to celebrate his sin? By celebrating what God forbids am I allowing myself to partake in sin myself and defy Gods design for marriage? That’s where I’m caught up and spinning my wheels. I do love him as a brother but is the greater act of love going along with everyone else pretending his sin is ok or is greater love being the one guy who he least expects and probably the only one in the family refusing to attend in an act of tough love?
 

CS1

Well-known member
May 23, 2012
12,997
4,308
113
#26
Hello there. I have myself quite a situation. My wife’s brother is a Homosexual and recently got “married” to his partner in California. The ceremony was private due to covid but now that the restrictions are gone they want to have a larger reception in October and want us there. I’m torn on this cause they are nice people but there is something telling me not to go. I have this feeling that I would be engaging in celebration of someone’s sin which I’m very against. It also concerns me about the example I’m setting for my 5 year old boy. He would be watching daddy compromise his beliefs and watching daddy essentially celebrate sin. Am I thinking on this the wrong way as a Christian man, husband and father? If I stand against this lead my family as God intended and refuse to attend it will absolutely make family members very angry and disappointed in me. It’s probably going to add stress to an already weak marriage of mine cause my wife believes she needs to be there for her brother. This isn’t the first issue we have had regarding the Homosexual brother in law. My wife’s family is also pushing us to allow the Homosexual couple to be my sons legal guardian/ godparents if we were to pass on. My wife thinks it’s a great idea but I’m not ok with this because I believe that as a father I have the duty to give my son the best chance at living in a Christian household with a strong masculine husband and wife marriage. I have a brother who is married but my wife doesn’t get along with them. She has a sister with a husband but she has that one out of the question as well. I’m trying to get out ahead of this before it becomes all a big train wreck but I keep stumbling. Please help. How do I lead my family through this mess? If nothing else please pray for us.

I will tell you this I am a minister and was asked by my mother to do the wedding service for my cousin here godchild who I gay and entering a partnership they call marriage. 1. it is not marriage 2. There is no way I would do it 3. I did not even go.

it was very upsetting to my mom and other family members yet I told them when he after the happiest time in his life as everyone was saying to me. he fell back into drugs and tried to commit suicide.

I told my mother and family YOU all will answer to the living God for supporting the self-destruction of this person. it is a sexual preference that produces NO Peace. and because you women who felt sorry because of his past abuses made excuses to support this because you had guilt. God said it is sin and it will not be blessed. and I will not go to one even if my own Child who was tight the word of God this is sin and chose to. I told my son who is shacking up that God will not bless him until 1. he leaves 2. get marriage 3. ask God to forgive him and return to God.

We don't take perversion and call it love and try to make God accept it. God is HOLY.
 
T

tstumf

Guest
#27
I will tell you this I am a minister and was asked by my mother to do the wedding service for my cousin here godchild who I gay and entering a partnership they call marriage. 1. it is not marriage 2. There is no way I would do it 3. I did not even go.

it was very upsetting to my mom and other family members yet I told them when he after the happiest time in his life as everyone was saying to me. he fell back into drugs and tried to commit suicide.

I told my mother and family YOU all will answer to the living God for supporting the self-destruction of this person. it is a sexual preference that produces NO Peace. and because you women who felt sorry because of his past abuses made excuses to support this because you had guilt. God said it is sin and it will not be blessed. and I will not go to one even if my own Child who was tight the word of God this is sin and chose to. I told my son who is shacking up that God will not bless him until 1. he leaves 2. get marriage 3. ask God to forgive him and return to God.

We don't take perversion and call it love and try to make God accept it. God is HOLY.
Thankyou CS1
 
Apr 26, 2021
495
151
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#29
Hello there. I have myself quite a situation. My wife’s brother is a Homosexual and recently got “married” to his partner in California. The ceremony was private due to covid but now that the restrictions are gone they want to have a larger reception in October and want us there. I’m torn on this cause they are nice people but there is something telling me not to go. I have this feeling that I would be engaging in celebration of someone’s sin which I’m very against. It also concerns me about the example I’m setting for my 5 year old boy. He would be watching daddy compromise his beliefs and watching daddy essentially celebrate sin. Am I thinking on this the wrong way as a Christian man, husband and father? If I stand against this lead my family as God intended and refuse to attend it will absolutely make family members very angry and disappointed in me. It’s probably going to add stress to an already weak marriage of mine cause my wife believes she needs to be there for her brother. This isn’t the first issue we have had regarding the Homosexual brother in law. My wife’s family is also pushing us to allow the Homosexual couple to be my sons legal guardian/ godparents if we were to pass on. My wife thinks it’s a great idea but I’m not ok with this because I believe that as a father I have the duty to give my son the best chance at living in a Christian household with a strong masculine husband and wife marriage. I have a brother who is married but my wife doesn’t get along with them. She has a sister with a husband but she has that one out of the question as well. I’m trying to get out ahead of this before it becomes all a big train wreck but I keep stumbling. Please help. How do I lead my family through this mess? If nothing else please pray for us.
You can't just be "congenial" about this. You have your feelings about the subject matter and no one should impose on it. You have to have some boundaries that just can't be crossed and a good domestic partner understands this. You don't certain boundaries and they don't cross certain boundaries.

What is really being expected of you is to allow your wife and your inlaws to impose a deviant "normalcy" on you and your children. You have to firmly reject that and tell them to live their life and let you live yours and raise your son as you deem fit.
 

mustaphadrink

Senior Member
Dec 13, 2013
1,987
372
83
#30
Hello there. I have myself quite a situation. My wife’s brother is a Homosexual and recently got “married” to his partner in California. The ceremony was private due to covid but now that the restrictions are gone they want to have a larger reception in October and want us there. I’m torn on this cause they are nice people but there is something telling me not to go. I have this feeling that I would be engaging in celebration of someone’s sin which I’m very against. It also concerns me about the example I’m setting for my 5 year old boy. He would be watching daddy compromise his beliefs and watching daddy essentially celebrate sin. Am I thinking on this the wrong way as a Christian man, husband and father? If I stand against this lead my family as God intended and refuse to attend it will absolutely make family members very angry and disappointed in me. It’s probably going to add stress to an already weak marriage of mine cause my wife believes she needs to be there for her brother. This isn’t the first issue we have had regarding the Homosexual brother in law. My wife’s family is also pushing us to allow the Homosexual couple to be my sons legal guardian/ godparents if we were to pass on. My wife thinks it’s a great idea but I’m not ok with this because I believe that as a father I have the duty to give my son the best chance at living in a Christian household with a strong masculine husband and wife marriage. I have a brother who is married but my wife doesn’t get along with them. She has a sister with a husband but she has that one out of the question as well. I’m trying to get out ahead of this before it becomes all a big train wreck but I keep stumbling. Please help. How do I lead my family through this mess? If nothing else please pray for us.
Satan wants to destroy the family because it is the image of God. Anything he can do to compromise it he will. You will find generally homosexuals have only one concern and that is me, myself and I. They are not very good at seeing the other point of view. That means you can usually say what you like but you won't convince a homosexual of your point of view because he doesn't want to see it.

We have a saying that there is no ought in the kingdom of God. You ought to do this or you ought to do that. I find that the best course is always to do what the Spirit tells you to do. If that upsets someone, stiff cheddar.

My wife and I have not accepted wedding invitations because the reason for the invitation was wrong so we gave it a miss.

As to your wife, either you are head of your house or you are not. If she does not accept what you believe is right she has to sort that out with God, not you. Stand firm in the liberty where Christ has set you free and not yield to the yoke of bondage. That will lead you nowhere.
 
Oct 10, 2020
107
36
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#31
Ow I don’t hate the guy. I love him undoubtedly. But is it appropriate to use tough love whereby refusing to celebrate his sin? By celebrating what God forbids am I allowing myself to partake in sin myself and defy Gods design for marriage? That’s where I’m caught up and spinning my wheels. I do love him as a brother but is the greater act of love going along with everyone else pretending his sin is ok or is greater love being the one guy who he least expects and probably the only one in the family refusing to attend in an act of tough love?
Satan wants to destroy the family because it is the image of God. Anything he can do to compromise it he will. You will find generally homosexuals have only one concern and that is me, myself and I. They are not very good at seeing the other point of view. That means you can usually say what you like but you won't convince a homosexual of your point of view because he doesn't want to see it.

We have a saying that there is no ought in the kingdom of God. You ought to do this or you ought to do that. I find that the best course is always to do what the Spirit tells you to do. If that upsets someone, stiff cheddar.

My wife and I have not accepted wedding invitations because the reason for the invitation was wrong so we gave it a miss.

As to your wife, either you are head of your house or you are not. If she does not accept what you believe is right she has to sort that out with God, not you. Stand firm in the liberty where Christ has set you free and not yield to the yoke of bondage. That will lead you nowhere.
Make no mistake, i am not gay, i am a true Christian in search of where in nt
scriptire that Jesus said being homosexuality is a sin. In fact. Jesus woul love that person even more.
 

17Bees

Senior Member
Oct 14, 2016
1,380
813
113
#32
Make no mistake, i am not gay, i am a true Christian in search of where in nt
scriptire that Jesus said being homosexuality is a sin. In fact. Jesus woul love that person even more.
There's two trains of thought for that. First Jesus talks about husbands and wives and mentions twice the term "sexual immorality" in Matthew 19:9 This is important because Mosiac Law deliberately defines sexual immorality in Leviticus. And you have to remember that Jesus was, at the time, under the law of Moses. In fact Christ was without sin because He obeyed the law of Moses. Therefore, Jesus did, in fact mention all sexual immorality, of which homosexuality is part.

Second, would Jesus' omission of actually saying homosexuality is sin justification, then, that it's OK by God? Would pedophilia or beastiality be OK because they weren't mentioned specifically? I don't think that's an argument.
 
Apr 26, 2021
495
151
43
#33
Make no mistake, i am not gay, i am a true Christian in search of where in nt
scriptire that Jesus said being homosexuality is a sin. In fact. Jesus woul love that person even more.
Jesus would say to the gay person the same thing he said to the adulteress: "Go, and sin no more." (John 8:11)
 

CS1

Well-known member
May 23, 2012
12,997
4,308
113
#34
Make no mistake, i am not gay, i am a true Christian in search of where in nt
scriptire that Jesus said being homosexuality is a sin. In fact. Jesus woul love that person even more.
it is a no-brainer Jesus never said having sex with a child was a sin YET it is very much so. Jesus would not love a person, even more, what a lie from the pit of Hell

The Love of Jesus was given with ALL at the Cross. You accept that or not. He will hear repentance not appeasement for sexual sin.
 

Kitkit

New member
Jun 10, 2021
24
24
3
#35
Read Romans chapter 1 verse 32.
May the holy spirit guide you in live to make decisions that are approved by God.
 

Evmur

Well-known member
Feb 28, 2021
5,219
2,618
113
London
christianchat.com
#36
Hello there. I have myself quite a situation. My wife’s brother is a Homosexual and recently got “married” to his partner in California. The ceremony was private due to covid but now that the restrictions are gone they want to have a larger reception in October and want us there. I’m torn on this cause they are nice people but there is something telling me not to go. I have this feeling that I would be engaging in celebration of someone’s sin which I’m very against. It also concerns me about the example I’m setting for my 5 year old boy. He would be watching daddy compromise his beliefs and watching daddy essentially celebrate sin. Am I thinking on this the wrong way as a Christian man, husband and father? If I stand against this lead my family as God intended and refuse to attend it will absolutely make family members very angry and disappointed in me. It’s probably going to add stress to an already weak marriage of mine cause my wife believes she needs to be there for her brother. This isn’t the first issue we have had regarding the Homosexual brother in law. My wife’s family is also pushing us to allow the Homosexual couple to be my sons legal guardian/ godparents if we were to pass on. My wife thinks it’s a great idea but I’m not ok with this because I believe that as a father I have the duty to give my son the best chance at living in a Christian household with a strong masculine husband and wife marriage. I have a brother who is married but my wife doesn’t get along with them. She has a sister with a husband but she has that one out of the question as well. I’m trying to get out ahead of this before it becomes all a big train wreck but I keep stumbling. Please help. How do I lead my family through this mess? If nothing else please pray for us.
You must do what is right, you can do it courteously, you can assure them of your love.

When my family insisted that I must partake of Catholic communion to attend my father's funeral, I could not do that. They hate me for it [I have a large family] however I remain in blest fellowship with God.

One sister, though she disapproved of me yet she has re affirmed her love for me.
 
Oct 23, 2020
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#37
Shows you have to be really careful who you tie the knot with.....
Anyhow you are the spiritual head of the family, and if your wife doesn't like it, tough.

That's a bit harsh on the Catholics Evmur...
 

CS1

Well-known member
May 23, 2012
12,997
4,308
113
#38
You must do what is right, you can do it courteously, you can assure them of your love.

When my family insisted that I must partake of Catholic communion to attend my father's funeral, I could not do that. They hate me for it [I have a large family] however I remain in blest fellowship with God.

One sister, though she disapproved of me yet she has re-affirmed her love for me.
that is too bad because I have too many RCC mass which did during funerals and they denied those who were not members to receive communion instead of leading them to Christ they told beat feet.
 

Magpi89

New member
Jun 5, 2021
24
13
3
#39
Hello there. I have myself quite a situation. My wife’s brother is a Homosexual and recently got “married” to his partner in California. The ceremony was private due to covid but now that the restrictions are gone they want to have a larger reception in October and want us there. I’m torn on this cause they are nice people but there is something telling me not to go. I have this feeling that I would be engaging in celebration of someone’s sin which I’m very against. It also concerns me about the example I’m setting for my 5 year old boy. He would be watching daddy compromise his beliefs and watching daddy essentially celebrate sin. Am I thinking on this the wrong way as a Christian man, husband and father? If I stand against this lead my family as God intended and refuse to attend it will absolutely make family members very angry and disappointed in me. It’s probably going to add stress to an already weak marriage of mine cause my wife believes she needs to be there for her brother. This isn’t the first issue we have had regarding the Homosexual brother in law. My wife’s family is also pushing us to allow the Homosexual couple to be my sons legal guardian/ godparents if we were to pass on. My wife thinks it’s a great idea but I’m not ok with this because I believe that as a father I have the duty to give my son the best chance at living in a Christian household with a strong masculine husband and wife marriage. I have a brother who is married but my wife doesn’t get along with them. She has a sister with a husband but she has that one out of the question as well. I’m trying to get out ahead of this before it becomes all a big train wreck but I keep stumbling. Please help. How do I lead my family through this mess? If nothing else please pray for us.

Hi Brother,

I am torn as well by the decision that you need to make. I think if I was in this situation, I would try to find the most God-Honoring and most loving course of action to take.

I agree with you to not celebrate or endorse the sin of another, and if possible to not let your son attend the wedding either. I would first spend much time to pray that God continues to hold our marriage together despite the already difficult circumstances. I would then try to talk to my wife first about this situation and what my convictions are. I would then talk to people who can support me spiritually and pray for me too.

One last practical advice I could suggest, if your wife insists on taking your son, then pray that your son will ask the question, why did my Daddy not attend the wedding with me. At least you can still set an example for him through your own actions.

Will pray for you as well.
 
T

tstumf

Guest
#40
Hi Brother,

I am torn as well by the decision that you need to make. I think if I was in this situation, I would try to find the most God-Honoring and most loving course of action to take.

I agree with you to not celebrate or endorse the sin of another, and if possible to not let your son attend the wedding either. I would first spend much time to pray that God continues to hold our marriage together despite the already difficult circumstances. I would then try to talk to my wife first about this situation and what my convictions are. I would then talk to people who can support me spiritually and pray for me too.

One last practical advice I could suggest, if your wife insists on taking your son, then pray that your son will ask the question, why did my Daddy not attend the wedding with me. At least you can still set an example for him through your own actions.

Will pray for you as well.
Thankyou for your advice and prayers I appreciate it.