Homosexual Brother In Law

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Ahwatukee

Senior Member
Mar 12, 2015
11,128
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So I’m trying to grasp what I’m up against here. I get home and she proceeds to tell me that she and her mother talked and they agreed I not attend on the stipulation they ca. LIE to my Brother in law and claim I didn’t come because I worked 😬. I told her I do not want them to lie about it and if that’s the case I will tell him myself. What is going on here?
Well, I'll be captain obvious here and say that your wife and mother in-law do not want your brother in-law to know the real reason you're not attending. You may just have to tell him yourself if they're going to lie about it.

Forgive me for saying so, but if they who call themselves Christians are not even willing to take up their crosses on this same-sex issue, what else would they not be willing to take a stand on? What I mean is that, as believers in Christ we are to be prepared to take our stand for Him and His Word, even in the face of persecution and death. I believe the times are coming when believers will be faced with those situations more and more as we get closer to the gathering of the church and the time of God's wrath. It leads me to wonder that if a believer is not willing to take their stand for righteousness on non-life threating issues, what would they do in the face of persecution and death?
 

tstumf

Active member
May 28, 2021
188
107
43
Well, I'll be captain obvious here and say that your wife and mother in-law do not want your brother in-law to know the real reason you're not attending. You may just have to tell him yourself if they're going to lie about it.

Forgive me for saying so, but if they who call themselves Christians are not even willing to take up their crosses on this same-sex issue, what else would they not be willing to take a stand on? What I mean is that, as believers in Christ we are to be prepared to take our stand for Him and His Word, even in the face of persecution and death. I believe the times are coming when believers will be faced with those situations more and more as we get closer to the gathering of the church and the time of God's wrath. It leads me to wonder that if a believer is not willing to take their stand for righteousness on non-life threating issues, what would they do in the face of persecution and death?
I’ve calmly guided her to all the scriptures that helped me with this situation despite being faced with a very un
Well, I'll be captain obvious here and say that your wife and mother in-law do not want your brother in-law to know the real reason you're not attending. You may just have to tell him yourself if they're going to lie about it.

Forgive me for saying so, but if they who call themselves Christians are not even willing to take up their crosses on this same-sex issue, what else would they not be willing to take a stand on? What I mean is that, as believers in Christ we are to be prepared to take our stand for Him and His Word, even in the face of persecution and death. I believe the times are coming when believers will be faced with those situations more and more as we get closer to the gathering of the church and the time of God's wrath. It leads me to wonder that if a believer is not willing to take their stand for righteousness on non-life threating issues, what would they do in the face of persecution and death?
I understand. From here on, being I’m getting a lot of less than Christian love and some very unloving pushback in general from her I don’t feel I should be updating the on situation on here for a while till we get a breakthrough. My feeling is till we reach agreement in Christ with this it should be a private matter from here on. I’ve shared scripture and supporting scripture her . Now weather she is receptive of it remains to be seen. Please continue to pray cause the spiritual warfare is heavy tonight.
 

SomeDisciple

Active member
Jul 4, 2021
238
123
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I don't think Jesus would go to a gay "wedding". Celebrating gay-romance just doesn't sound like something he would do for some reason.

I definitely sympathize with people who have same-sex attractions, because not all my desires have been holy, or even wholesome. But I think god's instructions to us are not just his rules, but they're for our benefit as well, and those that apply to marriage are certainly no exception.
 

presidente

Senior Member
May 29, 2013
6,776
1,038
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IMO, it may make sense just to call your brother-in-law and urge him to repent before he makes foolish oaths and entangles himself legally. At least you would have done your part, no matter what decision he makes.
 
Apr 17, 2019
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My wife’s brother is a Homosexual and recently got “married” to his partner in California. The ceremony was private due to covid but now that the restrictions are gone they want to have a larger reception in October and want us there. I’m torn on this cause they are nice people but there is something telling me not to go.
We Christians have to take a stand on Biblical principles. This situation is similar (as mentioned by others in previous posts) to a Christian declining to attend a festivity of any sort where there will be drinking to excess, provocatively dressed people, consumption of drugs, sexual "hook-ups," etc. Of course, the Christian kind course of behavior would be to have a conversation with these folks beforehand. It is one thing to "accept" unscriptural conduct and an entirely different thing to "promote" it, which it would be if you were to attend and celebrate their legalized homosexual union.
 

tstumf

Active member
May 28, 2021
188
107
43
I don't think Jesus would go to a gay "wedding". Celebrating gay-romance just doesn't sound like something he would do for some reason.

I definitely sympathize with people who have same-sex attractions, because not all my desires have been holy, or even wholesome. But I think god's instructions to us are not just his rules, but they're for our benefit as well, and those that apply to marriage are certainly no exception.


Indeed. Really leaning on “love is patient, love is kind” at the moment with regards to my marriage. Lots and lots of prayers and Reading lots of scripture cause at the moment wife and I are not in agreement on how to handle this. She’s insisting on going against my wishes. She believes the Holy Spirit is telling her to go to keep the peace…. Problem I have with this is she is not doing it out of strength of her faith but she is doing this from a point of unhealthy fear of man. I know God doesn’t give us a spirit of fear…. She is attending cause otherwise….What will brother think? what will mother think? I’m trying my best to be gentle and guiding but I guess I just don’t understand evidently. I’ve had a lot of unloving spiteful words directed at me from my wife last week It doesn’t matter what I say at this point she’s convinced I’m wrong. She’s pretending she respects my wishes but was willing to lie to her brother about why I’m not going to be there. For her evidently keeping the peace in her larger family is more important than losing her brother for eternity. She’s convinced herself she can show up to this thing and wear a shirt with a bible verse on it as concealed disapproval and be ok cause as she tells me “God knows where her heart is at.” “Knows her brother is going to hell and just wants to keep the peace”That’s where we’re at.

I have a handwritten letter I intend to send to the BIL due to the fact they are very emotional people in her family and I think I will probably get hung up on with a phone call before I say my peace. So I think the message will get through more clearly with a thoughtful yet brief letter that communicates my brotherly love for him and the reason why I will not be able to accept his invitation.

I’m giving the wife time to soften her heart towards my wishes and the word of God but this letter will be sent off regardless cause I will not have my wife and Mother in law lie about this like my faith is something to be ashamed of. People will know the truth of why I refuse to attend come what may. My wife is currently intentionally keeping herself in busyness so she doesn’t have to deal with this at the moment so I continue to pray because we have reached an impasse I’m afraid and it’s time to give it to God and let him work. That’s the latest development of this situation.
 

Rosemaryx

Senior Member
May 3, 2017
3,243
3,673
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Praise God you are standing on His word \0/
This has not been easy for you , but you are shining the Light of Christ on this darkness...
I think the letter is a great idea ...
...xox...
 

SomeDisciple

Active member
Jul 4, 2021
238
123
43
God strengthen you and bless you for taking a stand.

I guess there's always going to be people that laugh, or think it's dumb, or even hateful when we want to do things god's way. One way or another, he will get the glory in the end. It's god's love and our love for him that "wins". I just wish people weren't so difficult to persuade. Then again, i'm not easily persuaded of anything either.
 

Ahwatukee

Senior Member
Mar 12, 2015
11,128
2,349
113
I don't think Jesus would go to a gay "wedding". Celebrating gay-romance just doesn't sound like something he would do for some reason.

I definitely sympathize with people who have same-sex attractions, because not all my desires have been holy, or even wholesome. But I think god's instructions to us are not just his rules, but they're for our benefit as well, and those that apply to marriage are certainly no exception.
Agreed! Those who are living same-sex life styles have the same opportunity as any sinner to believe in Christ and be saved. The problem is, some who claim to be in Christ who are living this live style, do not want to repent of it, but to embrace it while continuing to claim to be a Christian. We also have to remember that currently God is pouring out a type of wrath where He is 'giving them over' to dishonorable passions. So that even the women are exchanging natural relations for unnatural ones. Likewise, the men have abandoned natural relations with women and are burning with lust for one another. So God giving them over to do what they ought not do. This is all outline in Romans 1:18-32
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
12,509
4,480
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Just tell your in law or whover needs to know that no you dont need to work because your job isnt actually on those days. Sometimes the truth is too hard for people to face, but lying doesnt help matters.

The truth doesnt need to be told yelling and screaming, just be firm and say no, this is unacceptable.

anyway, if you wife is going to lie she might but you are not going to. And you son is not going to lie either, say to your wife that your son isnt going to learn that lying is a way to get out of things.

just say well daddy isnt going and its not because he has needs to work hes just decided not to. Then plan something fun to do that day with your son (a purely fun day, not a go to dads work day...the go to work with dad day could be another day)
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
12,509
4,480
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although going to work with dad always fascinated me. I aLways wondered what dad actually got up to away from home.
 

GardenofWeeden

Active member
Jul 27, 2018
165
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The Garden of Weeden
that is too bad because I have too many RCC mass which did during funerals and they denied those who were not members to receive communion instead of leading them to Christ they told beat feet.
It is truly sad that so many would rather chastise than lead to Love. It breaks my heart.
 

tstumf

Active member
May 28, 2021
188
107
43
It has been a couple months since I updated this situation on here. The Brother In Law has been made aware that I will not be attending and has been made aware of the truth for my absence. They are disappointed but respecting my decision. The wife continues to say she’s going. Which brings me to my next issue. My son, is very attached to his mother. His grandma, the one putting on this reception is a very influential person to my sons life as well. If I insist he stay with me am I at risk of damaging my relationship with him or causing some kind of lasting resentment between my son and I ? I’m beginning to feel like this is going to be a wrestling match between my wishes as a father and their wishes. It’s going to be tough coming up against them because they know the way a child’s mind works . They know exactly what to say and how to say things to either make my son joyful or sad. Essentially, I’m fearful they may try to manipulate my sons emotions and leverage that against my decision. What can I do as a father to ensure my relationship with my son is not permanently damaged by this conflict? Please continue to pray for us.
 

Ahwatukee

Senior Member
Mar 12, 2015
11,128
2,349
113
It has been a couple months since I updated this situation on here. The Brother In Law has been made aware that I will not be attending and has been made aware of the truth for my absence. They are disappointed but respecting my decision. The wife continues to say she’s going. Which brings me to my next issue. My son, is very attached to his mother. His grandma, the one putting on this reception is a very influential person to my sons life as well. If I insist he stay with me am I at risk of damaging my relationship with him or causing some kind of lasting resentment between my son and I ? I’m beginning to feel like this is going to be a wrestling match between my wishes as a father and their wishes. It’s going to be tough coming up against them because they know the way a child’s mind works . They know exactly what to say and how to say things to either make my son joyful or sad. Essentially, I’m fearful they may try to manipulate my sons emotions and leverage that against my decision. What can I do as a father to ensure my relationship with my son is not permanently damaged by this conflict? Please continue to pray for us.
The Lord bless you for taking up your cross for Christ and His word. I am truly sorry that your wife is not taking her stand in Christ, but is choosing her family over Him. In these last days, it seems that many Christians are taking more of a worldly view regarding the issue of the same-sex life style. "Love is love" they claim. It is amazing how people forget about destruction that God brought about on Sodom and Gomorrah, which stands as an example of those who will suffer everlasting fire for doing the same, as though time would change God's mind about this.

What age is your son? If you have not already done so, I would have a private talk with him, so that he knows exactly what the issue is and the reason why you are not attending. Maybe you could read the account of Sodom and Gomorrah together and explain to him what those people were doing and why God destroyed them. Then tie it in with Jude 1:7

"In like manner, Sodom and Gomorrah and the cities around them, who indulged in sexual immorality and pursued strange flesh, are on display as an example of those who sustain the punishment of eternal fire."

"Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God.

In the beginning, God created them male and female. "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh."

When will this event take place?

I and I'm sure that many here, will keep you and your family in pray regarding this issue.
 

tstumf

Active member
May 28, 2021
188
107
43
The Lord bless you for taking up your cross for Christ and His word. I am truly sorry that your wife is not taking her stand in Christ, but is choosing her family over Him. In these last days, it seems that many Christians are taking more of a worldly view regarding the issue of the same-sex life style. "Love is love" they claim. It is amazing how people forget about destruction that God brought about on Sodom and Gomorrah, which stands as an example of those who will suffer everlasting fire for doing the same, as though time would change God's mind about this.

What age is your son? If you have not already done so, I would have a private talk with him, so that he knows exactly what the issue is and the reason why you are not attending. Maybe you could read the account of Sodom and Gomorrah together and explain to him what those people were doing and why God destroyed them. Then tie it in with Jude 1:7

"In like manner, Sodom and Gomorrah and the cities around them, who indulged in sexual immorality and pursued strange flesh, are on display as an example of those who sustain the punishment of eternal fire."

"Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God.

In the beginning, God created them male and female. "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh."

When will this event take place?

I and I'm sure that many here, will keep you and your family in pray regarding this issue.
Thankyou for the response. He’s 5. This is happening October 9th. I’m not sure even how to begin to explain those scriptures to a 5 year old in a manner in which he could understand it or even relate without frustrating or confusing him. He has a very simple understanding of the Bible and God at the moment. Mostly around the love of Jesus and basic stories at child level like Jonah and the whale, David and Goliath, Daniel and the Lions den, We read him children’s level Bible stories nightly … the book conveniently leaves out these kind of stories but tells the story of the battle of Jericho and tells the story of David and Goliath which figures . he struggles to recall what was read in these stories which is a battle in itself on another post of mine. I think we have planted the seed as best we can but it’s seed in very weedy soil if I was to relate it to the parable Jesus told. I’d be a little worried about flooding the seed by talking to him about Soddom and Gamorrah. I’ve been relentless in prayer about it with no answer. Is there perhaps a preferred way I could pray on this issue that might help. I will snap a photo of the table of contents in his Bible story book to maybe give some idea of what he is being read.
 

rayzor

Well-known member
Aug 20, 2021
1,708
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It's not suppose to be a choice sin.It's a sin that happens more in rich nations. According 2 the bible it's when the body is turn over 2 the devil.It's odd ?that any 1 could just live that way.