Why Don't We Hear About Single Christian Women Looking for Husbands in Other Countries?

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Feb 1, 2020
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#61
So, if one is not a virgin and had more than one mate that person drank from the cup? You mentioned fornication. Didn't Jesus die on the cross for such sins for those that have contritely confessed them? Were we not all children of Babylon at one time or another?
Yes, you understand correctly now, they have committed fornication which is the content of the spirit that is Babylon's cup.

This second questions is actually very good. Yes, even the fornicators can repent and turn from their sins and put their lovers away from them and escape from the terrible dark kingdom of Babylon and confessing, surrender to the army of the Lord God of course because of Lord Jesus' crucifixion and resurrection and if they believe on him and his Father and all his promises, and repent of their wicked deeds they can be forgiven thanks to Lord Jesus.

As I write this I think the parable of the prodigal son, very famously told by Lord Jesus explains the differences then in the Kingdom of Light between the Obedient Sons and the Prodigal Sons I suppose. Mindful though the Father is happy that his prodigal son return, the prodigal son messed himself up pretty badly and did suffer the wine of wrath as famines and whores devoured his inheritance and put him in a pitiful lot of life herding swine. Oft overlooked is the righteous son whom is angry by the Father celebrating the Repentant, somewhat like Jonah was to Nineveh. The Father pacifies the Obedient Son's anger reminding him that he is loved and will become the master of all the Father's Kingdom for believing in the inheritance and promise of his Father.


Luke 15:11-32

11 And he said, A certain man had two sons:

12 And the younger of them said to his father, Father, give me the portion of goods that falleth to me. And he divided unto them his living.

13 And not many days after the younger son gathered all together, and took his journey into a far country, and there wasted his substance with riotous living.

14 And when he had spent all, there arose a mighty famine in that land; and he began to be in want.

15 And he went and joined himself to a citizen of that country; and he sent him into his fields to feed swine.

16 And he would fain have filled his belly with the husks that the swine did eat: and no man gave unto him.

17 And when he came to himself, he said, How many hired servants of my father's have bread enough and to spare, and I perish with hunger!

18 I will arise and go to my father, and will say unto him, Father, I have sinned against heaven, and before thee,

19 And am no more worthy to be called thy son: make me as one of thy hired servants.

20 And he arose, and came to his father. But when he was yet a great way off, his father saw him, and had compassion, and ran, and fell on his neck, and kissed him.

21 And the son said unto him, Father, I have sinned against heaven, and in thy sight, and am no more worthy to be called thy son.

22 But the father said to his servants, Bring forth the best robe, and put it on him; and put a ring on his hand, and shoes on his feet:

23 And bring hither the fatted calf, and kill it; and let us eat, and be merry:

24 For this my son was dead, and is alive again; he was lost, and is found. And they began to be merry.

25 Now his elder son was in the field: and as he came and drew nigh to the house, he heard musick and dancing.

26 And he called one of the servants, and asked what these things meant.

27 And he said unto him, Thy brother is come; and thy father hath killed the fatted calf, because he hath received him safe and sound.

28 And he was angry, and would not go in: therefore came his father out, and intreated him.

29 And he answering said to his father, Lo, these many years do I serve thee, neither transgressed I at any time thy commandment: and yet thou never gavest me a kid, that I might make merry with my friends:

30 But as soon as this thy son was come, which hath devoured thy living with harlots, thou hast killed for him the fatted calf.

31 And he said unto him, Son, thou art ever with me, and all that I have is thine.

32 It was meet that we should make merry, and be glad: for this thy brother was dead, and is alive again; and was lost, and is found.
 

TheIndianGirl

Well-known member
Nov 22, 2019
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#62
I agree a prenup is not ideal and does indicate a lack of trust. The reality is, I think it takes a long time to know a person, and a lot is unknown during the dating stage especially if you dated for a short period. Having a prenup is nothing personal against your future spouse, especially if you have only known them for a short time.
 

TheIndianGirl

Well-known member
Nov 22, 2019
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#63
Finances automatically change once a person is married. Everything, without a prenup, is shared with a spouse first. Depending on the state, some states maintain that anything accumulated before marriage that person keeps, but that is not always the case. A lot of people also feel some sort of responsibility towards their elderly parents. I'd hate to get a divorce where the spouse get an unfair share, which disables me to take care of myself or other dependents in the future.
 

presidente

Senior Member
May 29, 2013
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#64
Numbers 25

1 And Israel abode in Shittim, and the people began to commit whoredom with the daughters of Moab.

2 And they called the people unto the sacrifices of their gods: and the people did eat, and bowed down to their gods.

3 And Israel joined himself unto Baalpeor: and the anger of the Lord was kindled against Israel.

4 And the Lord said unto Moses, Take all the heads of the people, and hang them up before the Lord against the sun, that the fierce anger of the Lord may be turned away from Israel.

5 And Moses said unto the judges of Israel, Slay ye every one his men that were joined unto Baalpeor.

6 And, behold, one of the children of Israel came and brought unto his brethren a Midianitish woman in the sight of Moses, and in the sight of all the congregation of the children of Israel, who were weeping before the door of the tabernacle of the congregation.

7 And when Phinehas, the son of Eleazar, the son of Aaron the priest, saw it, he rose up from among the congregation, and took a javelin in his hand;

8 And he went after the man of Israel into the tent, and thrust both of them through, the man of Israel, and the woman through her belly. So the plague was stayed from the children of Israel.

9 And those that died in the plague were twenty and four thousand.

10 And the Lord spake unto Moses, saying,

11 Phinehas, the son of Eleazar, the son of Aaron the priest, hath turned my wrath away from the children of Israel, while he was zealous for my sake among them, that I consumed not the children of Israel in my jealousy.

12 Wherefore say, Behold, I give unto him my covenant of peace:

13 And he shall have it, and his seed after him, even the covenant of an everlasting priesthood; because he was zealous for his God, and made an atonement for the children of Israel.

14 Now the name of the Israelite that was slain, even that was slain with the Midianitish woman, was Zimri, the son of Salu, a prince of a chief house among the Simeonites.

15 And the name of the Midianitish woman that was slain was Cozbi, the daughter of Zur; he was head over a people, and of a chief house in Midian.

16 And the Lord spake unto Moses, saying,

17 Vex the Midianites, and smite them:

18 For they vex you with their wiles, wherewith they have beguiled you in the matter of Peor, and in the matter of Cozbi, the daughter of a prince of Midian, their sister, which was slain in the day of the plague for Peor's sake.
Notice the passage does not say anything bad about Midianites marrying Moabites or Moabites marrying Greeks. I know of no law in the Torah against taking Midianites as wives. Zipporah was Moses' wife, and Miriam was struck with leprosy when she spoke against Moses after he had married a Cushite.
 

presidente

Senior Member
May 29, 2013
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#65
Finances automatically change once a person is married. Everything, without a prenup, is shared with a spouse first. Depending on the state, some states maintain that anything accumulated before marriage that person keeps, but that is not always the case. A lot of people also feel some sort of responsibility towards their elderly parents. I'd hate to get a divorce where the spouse get an unfair share, which disables me to take care of myself or other dependents in the future.
Wouldn't you also hate to marry a man who had set up a set of financial plans to make life easier in case your marriage does not work out?
 

presidente

Senior Member
May 29, 2013
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#66
Babylon's children are those that drank from her cup. The contents of her golden cup are fornications and abominations. This is one of very many ways to tell if someone is on Babylon's side. Those on Jesus' side are the virgins and those that have only had their one mate and stayed with that person in love and loyalty and truth, which is the correct way of God. Much can be said for the many wrong ways of Babylon and her children the sluts, but this should be sufficient.
I Corinthians 6

9 Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, 10 nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God. 11 And such were some of you. But you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus and by the Spirit of our God. (NKJV)
 
Feb 1, 2020
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#67
Notice the passage does not say anything bad about Midianites marrying Moabites or Moabites marrying Greeks. I know of no law in the Torah against taking Midianites as wives. Zipporah was Moses' wife, and Miriam was struck with leprosy when she spoke against Moses after he had married a Cushite.

Revelation 2:12-17

12 And to the angel of the church in Pergamos write; These things saith he which hath the sharp sword with two edges;

13 I know thy works, and where thou dwellest, even where Satan's seat is: and thou holdest fast my name, and hast not denied my faith, even in those days wherein Antipas was my faithful martyr, who was slain among you, where Satan dwelleth.

14 But I have a few things against thee, because thou hast there them that hold the doctrine of Balaam, who taught Balac to cast a stumblingblock before the children of Israel, to eat things sacrificed unto idols, and to commit fornication.

15 So hast thou also them that hold the doctrine of the Nicolaitanes, which thing I hate.

16 Repent; or else I will come unto thee quickly, and will fight against them with the sword of my mouth.

17 He that hath an ear, let him hear what the Spirit saith unto the churches; To him that overcometh will I give to eat of the hidden manna, and will give him a white stone, and in the stone a new name written, which no man knoweth saving he that receiveth it.
 

presidente

Senior Member
May 29, 2013
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#68
Revelation 2:12-17

12 And to the angel of the church in Pergamos write; These things saith he which hath the sharp sword with two edges;

13 I know thy works, and where thou dwellest, even where Satan's seat is: and thou holdest fast my name, and hast not denied my faith, even in those days wherein Antipas was my faithful martyr, who was slain among you, where Satan dwelleth.

14 But I have a few things against thee, because thou hast there them that hold the doctrine of Balaam, who taught Balac to cast a stumblingblock before the children of Israel, to eat things sacrificed unto idols, and to commit fornication.

15 So hast thou also them that hold the doctrine of the Nicolaitanes, which thing I hate.

16 Repent; or else I will come unto thee quickly, and will fight against them with the sword of my mouth.

17 He that hath an ear, let him hear what the Spirit saith unto the churches; To him that overcometh will I give to eat of the hidden manna, and will give him a white stone, and in the stone a new name written, which no man knoweth saving he that receiveth it.
I think you are getting off topic. One does not have to be a descendant of Midian or Moab to hold to the doctrine of Balaam. Jesus does not condemn people for their race here. He also doesn't say anything negative about a member of a Germanic tribe marrying a Cushite or something along those lines in this passage.
 
Feb 1, 2020
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#69
I think you are getting off topic. One does not have to be a descendant of Midian or Moab to hold to the doctrine of Balaam. Jesus does not condemn people for their race here. He also doesn't say anything negative about a member of a Germanic tribe marrying a Cushite or something along those lines in this passage.
It is notable that the Matter of Peor, the Sin of Balaam, is warned about in the New Testament, especially in the context of the erosion of the Church to usher in the Apocalypse. An old trick played a few times upon Israel.

Ezra 9:1-3

1 Now when these things were done, the princes came to me, saying, The people of Israel, and the priests, and the Levites, have not separated themselves from the people of the lands, doing according to their abominations, even of the Canaanites, the Hittites, the Perizzites, the Jebusites, the Ammonites, the Moabites, the Egyptians, and the Amorites.

2 For they have taken of their daughters for themselves, and for their sons: so that the holy seed have mingled themselves with the people of those lands: yea, the hand of the princes and rulers hath been chief in this trespass.

3 And when I heard this thing, I rent my garment and my mantle, and plucked off the hair of my head and of my beard, and sat down astonied.
 

presidente

Senior Member
May 29, 2013
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#70
It is notable that the Matter of Peor, the Sin of Balaam, is warned about in the New Testament, especially in the context of the erosion of the Church to usher in the Apocalypse. An old trick played a few times upon Israel.

Ezra 9:1-3

1 Now when these things were done, the princes came to me, saying, The people of Israel, and the priests, and the Levites, have not separated themselves from the people of the lands, doing according to their abominations, even of the Canaanites, the Hittites, the Perizzites, the Jebusites, the Ammonites, the Moabites, the Egyptians, and the Amorites.

2 For they have taken of their daughters for themselves, and for their sons: so that the holy seed have mingled themselves with the people of those lands: yea, the hand of the princes and rulers hath been chief in this trespass.

3 And when I heard this thing, I rent my garment and my mantle, and plucked off the hair of my head and of my beard, and sat down astonied.
Some Christians are Egyptian. This passage does not forbid Egyptian Christian men from marrying Egyptian Christian women. It is about the people of Israel mixing with forbidden people-groups. Ironically, it was not forbidden in the written Torah for Israelites to marry Egyptians. Joseph did. But it was forbidden for priests to do so. They may have been the ones who violated the law by marrying the non-forbidden women.

The law of Moses does not forbid the Gentile peoples from intermixing.
 
Feb 1, 2020
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#71
Some Christians are Egyptian. This passage does not forbid Egyptian Christian men from marrying Egyptian Christian women. It is about the people of Israel mixing with forbidden people-groups. Ironically, it was not forbidden in the written Torah for Israelites to marry Egyptians. Joseph did. But it was forbidden for priests to do so. They may have been the ones who violated the law by marrying the non-forbidden women.

The law of Moses does not forbid the Gentile peoples from intermixing.
Proverbs 23-26-27

26 My son, give me thine heart, and let thine eyes observe my ways;

27 for a whore is a deep ditch, and a strange woman is a narrow pit.

28 She also lieth in wait as for a prey, and increaseth the transgressors among men.


1 Kings 11:1-8

1 But king Solomon loved many strange women, together with the daughter of Pharaoh, women of the Moabites, Ammonites, Edomites, Zidonians, and Hittites:

2 Of the nations concerning which the Lord said unto the children of Israel, Ye shall not go in to them, neither shall they come in unto you: for surely they will turn away your heart after their gods: Solomon clave unto these in love.

3 And he had seven hundred wives, princesses, and three hundred concubines: and his wives turned away his heart.

4 For it came to pass, when Solomon was old, that his wives turned away his heart after other gods: and his heart was not perfect with the Lord his God, as was the heart of David his father.

5 For Solomon went after Ashtoreth the goddess of the Zidonians, and after Milcom the abomination of the Ammonites.

6 And Solomon did evil in the sight of the Lord, and went not fully after the Lord, as did David his father.

7 Then did Solomon build an high place for Chemosh, the abomination of Moab, in the hill that is before Jerusalem, and for Molech, the abomination of the children of Ammon.

8 And likewise did he for all his strange wives, which burnt incense and sacrificed unto their gods.
 

presidente

Senior Member
May 29, 2013
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#72
Egyptian women were strange women to Solomon, but wouldn't be to Egyptians. God's then future work in Egypt was predicted in the book of isaiah. There are Egyptian Christians nowadays.
 

presidente

Senior Member
May 29, 2013
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#73
Traditionally, this is more of a female thing to do than male:

- Following your husband back to his home country to live there.

A man might go to his wife's country to find work if it makes sense to do so. But usually it is hard to get set up in a new country. A lot of countries have more traditional cultures than the US in which the belief is the wife should follow the husband and/or the husband should be the provider for the family. So in the online dating scenarios, it makes more sense that the wife would go to the husbands country. For American posters, we have relatively high wages. What American man wants to compete for developing country wages-- a few hundred dollars a month-- when he could make more in the US? As tough as it is to get into the US, the Greencard is a much more generous visa situation than I have seen in a lot of the developing countries. In Indonesia, where I lived, if you want to live there and legally make a living, you have to have an employer sponsor your visa. Not every country offers someone married to a citizen nearly the same rights to work as a citizen of the country like the US does.

Many of these same reasons apply to wives moving to other developed countries with their husbands.

This is more of a male thing to do:
- Going abroad to work for adventure or to follow a career opportunity.

Some women do it, but it isn't as common.

What man from a traditional country wants to marry a western woman if she is an 'independent woman', a feminist or not traditional, as many western women are? If the women from developing countries work in developing countries, many of the men make less money. Women usually want men who are of the same or higher status than themselves, including in regard to how much money they make.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
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#74
to answer question it comes down to exchange rates and economy whether its feasible to raise a family in that country. Some countries make it really hard to raise a family.

for example in China they are famous for having a one child policy - if you want more you have to apply for more. Theres limited resources and land, and schools are competitive.

Jobs may not be easy to come by..so if a husband wants to provide, he needs to go where work is plentiful to support his family. If where he is there is work, then hes not gonna go somewhere else.
 

TheIndianGirl

Well-known member
Nov 22, 2019
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#75
What man from a traditional country wants to marry a western woman if she is an 'independent woman', a feminist or not traditional, as many western women are?
A lot of men from third world countries want to marry a Western woman (a lot of guys want to marry blondes, duh). Based on my observations, these men feel "lucky" to marry a Western woman and feel that women from their own countries are inferior in comparison.

I think this whole issue of who wants to marry who isn't so cut and dry. People are all different and have different preferences for their spouses. I think a lot of people don't mind going for an "exotic" spouse (even if that means an independent woman if that is the way the girl was raised in her culture) whatever that may be.
 
May 23, 2020
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#78
I've seen some episodes. I am not sure if I have seen a whole season yet. What kind of unrealistic expectations are you referring to?



There may be some percentage of younger men, maybe the ones on the tail end of the bell curve, who are attracted to older women. Maybe they want a mother figure for whatever reason. I have seen bits and pieces of the show and there were interviews with a young man from Africa who kept talking about how much he wanted to go to America while discussing his relationship with the woman. There was one of the men who married a woman who might have been in her 40's who ditched her after a short time.

Many of the relatives on the show suggest the foreigner just wants a Greencard. On the one hand, that may be the case for some of them. But it also highlights the thinking of some Americans that America has such great opportunity that all the foreigners want to go to the US just to work. There are some foreigners like that, but it makes sense that some of the young couples who met while the expat was travelling for an extended period of time or dated online could want to marry for the same reasons other couples do.

I might be a just a little more suspicious about the motives of the men marrying the older women. I am not sure about the percentage of expat and Filippina relationships where the man is quite older, but there seems to be a fair amount of older expats marrying Filippinas. The age gap was probably less when there was a military base there. Maybe the Filippines got a reputation as a place to get young wives, or maybe some of these older men had been in the navy way back.

Some people say Filippinas comes over to the US to scam men for Greencards. I have no idea the source, but I read on a website that about 25% of couples where the wife was a Filippina expat divorced. This poster pointed out that about 50% of marriages with local US women divorce, and he asked. who who are the real scam artists?

In some of the more traditional cultures, men want to have children. The young men marrying the older women may be giving that up, or giving up having children while they are young, if they are serious about staying together until one of them dies. But the woman who marries an old man might still expect to have children, since that could be normal in her own country even if her husband is old.

There are also people who might marry partly because the partner or moving to America could provide a better life, who are also serious about making a commitment for life. A lot of Americans tend to think of marriage as disposable if it doesn't make them happy. People from some of these other countries may be more likely to see marriage was permanent, which is one reason why some of the men go looking abroad.
An interesting story like this happened in Switzerland. A turkish man married a Swiss woman. After the required time, he got a Swiss passport. Then divorced his wife intending to bring the first wife, and kids I assume, to Switzerland. The Swiss put two and two together and revoked his citizenship and passport. I know a guy who knew him.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
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#79
yeh some people do that, marrying for residency.
Some people are more pragmatic than romantic in their marriage choices.

if you dont want to live in the country you are born in, you emigrate to another. in many countries marriage means you can become a permanent resident it actually confers on you this status. It declares to officials you are staying put. Of course not everyone does this but its implied that you are going to settle down, have a family etc.

Although my sister went overseas to work after she stayed there five years and became a permanent resident and hasnt married. So it just depends. I suspect OP doesnt hear about it much because the christian females in the circles she is in is quite comfortable where they are and has more choices or options in life that they dont need to look or go anywhere else. if you have a big population where there are elgible men to marry and its easy to do so then why would you go overseas.
 

Prycejosh1987

Active member
Jul 19, 2020
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#80
* Do you know of any couples in which the spouses come from completely different countries and/or cultures, or are you in such a marriage yourself?

* If so, was it the man or the woman who did the pursuing?
I did pursue a relationship with a girl from another city. It was 3/4 hours journey just to see her. At the time it was £40 per visit, i tried to see her every week, in the end, we mutually gave up on our relationship even though we became god friends online. She is married now.