Poems, thoughts, songs

no offense but what does this have to do with what I wrote? Do you think I wrote this to you? Is it relate-able to your situation or something?

I wrote it for a man.
I am the type of woman who was taught to take on both roles to care depend on myself, I was hurt so much I don't trust men..
I didn't need a man to save me, I didn't need anyone...because I am insecure, and neurotic at times...I admit.
Maybe it's wrong and emasculating for a woman to do this. To write and romance a man. Maybe I over did it and pushed him away. I never gave him the chance to be that for me.

Either way. I just need my own explanation of why things happened, ...and that's as good as any for me.
Maybe it's just closure...
my heart is broken, and this is all the closure I am going to get..

I have to move on.

You stated "I don't think anyone expects a person to love like God".
I said the opposite. That that is exactly what people do, unknowingly.
Now you say that we're saying the same thing. But I disagrees with what you said, so I'm lost.

I think her line is (don't know her specific situation, just meaning generalized) is accurate. And romance is often the most obvious, and common, example. So many seem to marry thinking that everything will be all better. That this person will be their happiness. Believing that the love they crave is Eros not realizing it's actually Agape that they seek.
But since human love and eros love cannot replace Agape, imperfect people keep searching, in other imperfect people, for perfect love. Perhaps that is what this man was doing?

I do agree, though, that we have to seek God for perfect love and accept that no person in earth can give it to us. Not can we give it to another. But until people find it in God they will continue placing others on pedestals whenever they believe they have found it in someone.

I think you are both oversimplifying the nature of love. I honestly don’t think anyone REALLY thinks that a flawed human being can love like God. I mean, honestly, we find out pretty quickly in the home that people are imperfect and will let you down, every time. Even the best mother and father in the world sometimes let their kids down. I don’t think people are so silly as to think others are perfect.

The part that I agree with you is that I agree that people stumble and bumble when in love and mistakes are made, harsh words said, things are misunderstood, love is doubted. This doesn’t mean it should be thrown away.

You stated "I don't think anyone expects a person to love like God".
I said the opposite. That that is exactly what people do, unknowingly.
Now you say that we're saying the same thing. But I disagrees with what you said, so I'm lost.

I think her line is (don't know her specific situation, just meaning generalized) is accurate. And romance is often the most obvious, and common, example. So many seem to marry thinking that everything will be all better. That this person will be their happiness. Believing that the love they crave is Eros not realizing it's actually Agape that they seek.
But since human love and eros love cannot replace Agape, imperfect people keep searching, in other imperfect people, for perfect love. Perhaps that is what this man was doing?

I do agree, though, that we have to seek God for perfect love and accept that no person in earth can give it to us. Not can we give it to another. But until people find it in God they will continue placing others on pedestals whenever they believe they have found it in someone.

I am very afraid that anything I say to you may be misconstrued. I just want to conjecture that perhaps YOU think he was looking for perfect love, when he wasn’t. Perhaps he just wants your imperfect love.

I think you are both oversimplifying the nature of love. I honestly don’t think anyone REALLY thinks that a flawed human being can love like God. I mean, honestly, we find out pretty quickly in the home that people are imperfect and will let you down, every time. Even the best mother and father in the world sometimes let their kids down. I don’t think people are so silly as to think others are perfect.

The part that I agree with you is that I agree that people stumble and bumble when in love and mistakes are made, harsh words said, things are misunderstood, love is doubted. This doesn’t mean it should be thrown away.

Galatea
Let me share with you a theoretical scenario and you can be the judge:

There are two men courting a woman...

The 1st man is the man is a well known artist in a neighboring town a hundred miles away, he was a painter who was skillful at painting the best paintings. she first fell in love with this man, they were so deep and intimate and happy together. The only thing was that this man told the woman that they should keep their love a secret and hide it away because he didn't want his friends or fans knowing something so scandalous, maybe it would be embarrassing or he was afraid he would lose his great status if he were with her. When they were together in secret they seemed pretty happy, but alone she felt sad, miserable and heartbroken, frustrated and angry. She cried a lot out of loneliness because they were far a part and he didn't want to risk anything to be with her.

During his art showings of his paintings people would come far and wide to see, and they would pay. She was no exception she would spend her own money just to see him and travel a hundred miles. She had to prove that she loved him, so that he could trust her and earn the right to have his love.

She waited years for him because she loved him, and he told her to wait for him, until the day she realized she waited too long and could no longer have children because she got past the age that you could. This becomes undesirable for the artist who desired children and someone who made him look good. He loved the woman but only in secret. When she would talk to him he pretended he didn't know her, or that she was nobody to him. He was ashamed of her,
...but the intimate part of their relationship was why he kept her around, even though it pretty much destroyed her life and tore her apart.

He said the only way they could be together is if she ran away and left her friends and family behind for him so they could be together secretly while his life was still intact.

The 2nd man is a man who lives in her town, who was poor shop owner, but attractive and romantic. She had no relationship with this man but this man was in love with this woman. He would talk to her daily and tried to befriend her even though she was broken from the first guy her heart was with. He would write her songs, and bring her the best looking roses and leave them at her doorstep. He would invite her to his house and to meet his friends to show her off even though they weren't dating. He would invite her to dance with him at several dances to romantic songs. This man would throw "princess" themed parties in her honor in front of her friends and family. This man had loved her so much he didn't care about her past or that she couldn't have children. He just knew he wanted to spend his life with her.

-end theoretical scenario-

Do you think this woman would be throwing love away still if she let go of the first man and gave the second man a chance to be with her?

I don’t know. I think she should love the man she wants to love. The second man did a lot for her, but in the scenario, you did not say that they were intimate (I mean intimate in a soul sense). The intimacy with the first man is worth more than all the things the second man can do for her. Why didn’t she run away with him?

I have this feeling you did not read the theoretical scenario but to humor you since you are so determined to shut me down.
I will kick you the epilogue of her running away with the first man..

Theoretical epilogue continues:

So, since she does not know the 2nd man very well she turns his love down. She says to her parents, friends and family "Forget ya'll!" (people she loves with everything she has, they are pretty much everything to her)..

and saves all her money, and runs away to be with the first man, the artist...

Well here are a few things that might happen:

1. She walks up to him, and says: "I gave everything up to be with you. I love you." he looks at her and laughs, and grabs a beautiful slender young woman with huge boobs and walks away. She has spent all her money, pretty much abandoned her family and friends, denied a man who would have loved her. She has no one and no where to go. Humiliated she has to find a new job, earns her way back home to her family (who's heart's she just broke) turns into an old woman and dies alone of a broken heart. This is probably the more realistic.

2. This would be a 1 in a million, rare thing that would probably never happen statistically, I mean if you weren't looking at it realistically...
She walks up to the artist, and says "I have given up everything to be here with you. I love you." he says, "Me too!" and they run off and get married, he suddenly decides to change and become brave and they end up with a hard life together but at least they are together.
---

People don't change...especially for another person. I wish that were true. If the person isn't trying anymore, isn't talking, cuts you off, then maybe they don't want to be together anymore..
What would running away accomplish then..? Who is she running to anymore?

I did read the scenario, twice. I don’t want to shut you down, or be contrary for contrary’s sake. I just told you my opinion. I think intimacy is more important than things. If he asked her to run away with him, why would he not want her when she came to him? That doesn’t compute.

Plus, the million to one chances are worth the risk.

I guess it is a matter of loving whomever you wish to love. If she wants to love the first man, she will. If she wants to love the second man, she will. There is not really much I can say.

Although this is merely hypothetical or theoretical, I still appreciate your input. It's very interesting and gives me a lot to think about.

You are welcome. I don’t think it is much use trying to tell people who to love. The heart wants what the heart wants, after all. The Heloise and Abelard story illustrates that, pretty well.

Sorry ya’ll, this ain’t none of my business…But still got to throw my opinion out here for some odd reason.

It’s plain to see that dude A or 1 or whatever you want to call him, is not in love with the girl. There is no real intimacy…It’s a one sided relationship. If someone loves you they are not going to be embarrassed of you and only take from you and never give to you.

We know Jesus is true love, but he even says that if you deny me before men I will deny you before my father.

Anyone that loves you is going to show it. They ain’t going to make you their dirty little secret.