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L
Sorry for getting snippy at you 1ofthem I am just afraid of being accused, when
I am trying...I know you mean well. I'm just a huge creep who takes things too serious and harder than most.
I don't really paint, I have spent several hours on this painting.
Several years ago I was very heartbroken to the point of suicide,
actually I was in the middle of the act of it, an overdose.
I was demonically tormented, felt so much fire and heaviness, it was a supernatural
experience, way worse than now.
I was also heartbroken about being unloved and unwanted.
As I lay there on the bed waiting to die, I felt cold,
I don't think I was dying but I thought I was.
I remember closing my eyes and seeing myself and a tree.
Then I seen these yellow words..
like:
Stupid,
ugly,
unwanted,
worthless,
idiot,
whore,
etc.
Every word that constantly tormented me.
Then I seen Jesus, wearing this white robe, he kind of looked like that in the picture.
He always does when he visits me.
He knocked the words and blocked them from hitting me.
I remember this.
So I decided to paint it..
This is who Jesus is to me.
He is my friend.
I am trying...I know you mean well. I'm just a huge creep who takes things too serious and harder than most.
I don't really paint, I have spent several hours on this painting.
Several years ago I was very heartbroken to the point of suicide,
actually I was in the middle of the act of it, an overdose.
I was demonically tormented, felt so much fire and heaviness, it was a supernatural
experience, way worse than now.
I was also heartbroken about being unloved and unwanted.
As I lay there on the bed waiting to die, I felt cold,
I don't think I was dying but I thought I was.
I remember closing my eyes and seeing myself and a tree.
Then I seen these yellow words..
like:
Stupid,
ugly,
unwanted,
worthless,
idiot,
whore,
etc.
Every word that constantly tormented me.
Then I seen Jesus, wearing this white robe, he kind of looked like that in the picture.
He always does when he visits me.
He knocked the words and blocked them from hitting me.
I remember this.
So I decided to paint it..
This is who Jesus is to me.
He is my friend.
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Hey, it's alright.....You misunderstood what I was trying to convey...No biggie, it happens. I can be a total jerk myself sometimes, but I was really just trying to say that it is good to forgive others and in doing so you are putting God first and when we do that he can work in our life.
Anyhow, no hard feelings...May God bless you.
Anyhow, no hard feelings...May God bless you.
M
Lovesong: Your last post is really touching! Know that you are truly precious! Even during your most darkest moments of life, Jesus reaches out to you! I am so glad you didn't end up dying, even though life can sometimes feel so difficult to continue living. *BIG Hugs*
Love the painting, it is as powerful painted as your shared testimony.
Your painting did stir up some emotions in me, had to keep my tears inside.
Love the painting, it is as powerful painted as your shared testimony.
Your painting did stir up some emotions in me, had to keep my tears inside.
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L
Lovesong: Your last post is really touching! Know that you are truly precious! Even during your most darkest moments of life, Jesus reaches out to you! I am so glad you didn't end up dying, even though life can sometimes feel so difficult to continue living. *BIG Hugs*
Love the painting, it is as powerful painted as your shared testimony. Your painting did stir up some emotions in me, had to keep my tears inside.
Love the painting, it is as powerful painted as your shared testimony.
Your painting did stir up some emotions in me, had to keep my tears inside.
that is really kind of you to say.
At the time, I was in a bad way, and there was no way out, no one could know or understand what I was going through, and it lasted a long time. I think Jesus is constantly advocating our case at all times. To me it was his way of saying that he was there, and he knew exactly what we are all going through.It's a good reminder.
Thanks again.
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L
**please do not respond or reply this,
if you do I will assume that you cannot read nor follow directions,
and I will be very disappointed, but whatever.
I decided to stop writing here, I realize I am overboard
with writing that is going no where.
This is a good way to close this door
and for me to move on.**
Closure
Not that you care,
but I need to do this
because I did care,
and it meant a lot more to me
than it did to you.
I am going to stop writing to you here.
if you do I will assume that you cannot read nor follow directions,
and I will be very disappointed, but whatever.
I decided to stop writing here, I realize I am overboard
with writing that is going no where.
This is a good way to close this door
and for me to move on.**
Closure
Not that you care,
but I need to do this
because I did care,
and it meant a lot more to me
than it did to you.
I am going to stop writing to you here.
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L
Coincidences
by me
Things have a way
of happening for no reason.
Always searching for signs,
and for the why,
suffering heartache,
wasting more than one lonely season,
that leaves more you empty
than when you began.
It doesn't matter...
It didn't mean a thing.
Coincidences, nothing more than
meaningless dreams.
like holding onto sandcastles
collapsing through your palms,
til nothing, and your hands
bleeding coloring the ocean pink,
holding on so tightly,
Let go,
and move on
it doesn't matter
It didn't mean a thing.
Coincidences, nothing more than
meaningless dreams.
by me
Things have a way
of happening for no reason.
Always searching for signs,
and for the why,
suffering heartache,
wasting more than one lonely season,
that leaves more you empty
than when you began.
It doesn't matter...
It didn't mean a thing.
Coincidences, nothing more than
meaningless dreams.
like holding onto sandcastles
collapsing through your palms,
til nothing, and your hands
bleeding coloring the ocean pink,
holding on so tightly,
Let go,
and move on
it doesn't matter
It didn't mean a thing.
Coincidences, nothing more than
meaningless dreams.
L
[video=youtube;v7LMe8y4uKw]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v7LMe8y4uKw[/video]
Oh My Soul
Lyrics by Casting Crowns
Oh, my soul
Oh, how you worry
Oh, how you’re weary, from fearing you lost control
This was the one thing, you didn’t see coming
And no one would blame you, though
If you cried in private
If you tried to hide it away, so no one knows
No one will see, if you stop believing
Oh, my soul
You are not alone
There’s a place where fear has to face the God you know
One more day, He will make a way
Let Him show you how, you can lay this down
‘Cause you’re not alone
Here and now
You can be honest
I won’t try to promise that someday it all works out
‘Cause this is the valley
And even now, He is breathing on your dry bones
And there will be dancing
There will be beauty where beauty was ash and stone
This much I know
I’m not strong enough, I can’t take anymore
(You can lay it down, you can lay it down)
And my shipwrecked faith will never get me to shore
(You can lay it down, you can lay it down)
Can He find me here
Can He keep me from going under
Oh, my soul
You’re not alone
Oh My Soul
Lyrics by Casting Crowns
Oh, my soul
Oh, how you worry
Oh, how you’re weary, from fearing you lost control
This was the one thing, you didn’t see coming
And no one would blame you, though
If you cried in private
If you tried to hide it away, so no one knows
No one will see, if you stop believing
Oh, my soul
You are not alone
There’s a place where fear has to face the God you know
One more day, He will make a way
Let Him show you how, you can lay this down
‘Cause you’re not alone
Here and now
You can be honest
I won’t try to promise that someday it all works out
‘Cause this is the valley
And even now, He is breathing on your dry bones
And there will be dancing
There will be beauty where beauty was ash and stone
This much I know
I’m not strong enough, I can’t take anymore
(You can lay it down, you can lay it down)
And my shipwrecked faith will never get me to shore
(You can lay it down, you can lay it down)
Can He find me here
Can He keep me from going under
Oh, my soul
You’re not alone
L
[video=youtube;B6fA35Ved-Y]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B6fA35Ved-Y[/video]
Even If
Lyrics by MercyMe
They say sometimes you win some
Sometimes you lose some
And right now, right now
I'm losing bad...
I've stood on this stage night after night
Reminding the broken it'll be alright
But right now, oh right now I just can't
It's easy to sing
When there's nothing to bring me down
But what will I say
When I'm held to the flame
Like I am right now?
I know You're able and I know You can
Save through the fire with Your mighty hand
But even if You don't
My hope is You alone
They say it only takes a little faith
To move a mountain
Well good thing
A little faith is all I have, right now
But God, when You choose
To leave mountains unmovable
Oh give me the strength to be able to sing
It is well with my soul
I know You're able and I know You can
Save through the fire with Your mighty hand
But even if You don't
My hope is You alone
I know the sorrow, and I know the hurt
Would all go away if You'd just say the word
But even if You don't
My hope is You alone
You've been faithful, You've been good
All of my days
Jesus, I will cling to You
Come what may
‘Cause I know You're able
I know You can
I know You're able and I know You can
Save through the fire with Your mighty hand
But even if You don't
My hope is You alone
I know the sorrow, I know the hurt
Would all go away if You'd just say the word
But even if You don't
My hope is You alone
...
It is well
with my soul
It is well,
it is well
with my soul
Even If
Lyrics by MercyMe
They say sometimes you win some
Sometimes you lose some
And right now, right now
I'm losing bad...
I've stood on this stage night after night
Reminding the broken it'll be alright
But right now, oh right now I just can't
It's easy to sing
When there's nothing to bring me down
But what will I say
When I'm held to the flame
Like I am right now?
I know You're able and I know You can
Save through the fire with Your mighty hand
But even if You don't
My hope is You alone
They say it only takes a little faith
To move a mountain
Well good thing
A little faith is all I have, right now
But God, when You choose
To leave mountains unmovable
Oh give me the strength to be able to sing
It is well with my soul
I know You're able and I know You can
Save through the fire with Your mighty hand
But even if You don't
My hope is You alone
I know the sorrow, and I know the hurt
Would all go away if You'd just say the word
But even if You don't
My hope is You alone
You've been faithful, You've been good
All of my days
Jesus, I will cling to You
Come what may
‘Cause I know You're able
I know You can
I know You're able and I know You can
Save through the fire with Your mighty hand
But even if You don't
My hope is You alone
I know the sorrow, I know the hurt
Would all go away if You'd just say the word
But even if You don't
My hope is You alone
...
It is well
with my soul
It is well,
it is well
with my soul
L
Selfish
by me
If you love me,
if you really love me,
then stop hurting me..
Sure you can explain away
that you can't help it because
you are who you are,
but thats just
excuse after excuse,
playing a pointless
broken record.
Wasting year after year.
What point are you trying to make?
If this is some sort of
apology, then,
I forgive you.
Let's just move on
with our lives.
I love you,
and I want you
to be happy,
If you want me to get over it,
then let me go,
leave me alone.
otherwise
I don't know what you
are trying to say.
I love you,
goodbye.
by me
If you love me,
if you really love me,
then stop hurting me..
Sure you can explain away
that you can't help it because
you are who you are,
but thats just
excuse after excuse,
playing a pointless
broken record.
Wasting year after year.
What point are you trying to make?
If this is some sort of
apology, then,
I forgive you.
Let's just move on
with our lives.
I love you,
and I want you
to be happy,
If you want me to get over it,
then let me go,
leave me alone.
otherwise
I don't know what you
are trying to say.
I love you,
goodbye.
L
This is my single and looking poem, this might be a lame or terrible idea but..
Im not sure how the rules for dating work but I am serious,
doesnt hurt to try..
Im not sure how the rules for dating work but I am serious,
doesnt hurt to try..
Single Heart
by me
'O single heart come and find me,
my heart is ready to share its love,
come and save me from
the cruel arrows and old flames,
that burn and pierce in apathy's reproach.
O single heart will I love,
and drop everything to be yours,
and when you are down
I will be a beam of support
to hold you up,
and you will hold my heart.
O single heart
come and find me.
O single heart
will I love.'
'O single heart come and find me,
my heart is ready to share its love,
come and save me from
the cruel arrows and old flames,
that burn and pierce in apathy's reproach.
O single heart will I love,
and drop everything to be yours,
and when you are down
I will be a beam of support
to hold you up,
and you will hold my heart.
O single heart
come and find me.
O single heart
will I love.'
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L
Chris Isaac lyrics
The world was on fire and no one could save me but you
It's strange what desire will make foolish people do
I'd never dreamed that I'd meet somebody like you
And I'd never dreamed that I'd lose somebody like you
What a wicked game you played to make me feel this way
What a wicked thing to do to let me dream of you
What a wicked thing to say you never felt this way
What a wicked thing to do to make me dream of you
And I don't want to fall in love
No, I don't want to fall in love
With you
The world was on fire and no one could save me but you
It's strange what desire will make foolish people do
I'd never dreamed that I'd love somebody like you
And I'd never dreamed that I'd lose somebody like you
No, I don't want to fall in love
No, I don't want to fall in love
With you
With you
No, I ...
*repeat*
I'd never dreamed that I'd love somebody like you.
The world was on fire and no one could save me but you
It's strange what desire will make foolish people do
I'd never dreamed that I'd meet somebody like you
And I'd never dreamed that I'd lose somebody like you
What a wicked game you played to make me feel this way
What a wicked thing to do to let me dream of you
What a wicked thing to say you never felt this way
What a wicked thing to do to make me dream of you
And I don't want to fall in love
No, I don't want to fall in love
With you
The world was on fire and no one could save me but you
It's strange what desire will make foolish people do
I'd never dreamed that I'd love somebody like you
And I'd never dreamed that I'd lose somebody like you
No, I don't want to fall in love
No, I don't want to fall in love
With you
With you
No, I ...
*repeat*
I'd never dreamed that I'd love somebody like you.
L
Untitled Song
by me
I admit I asked for it to every time,
didn't know how long I'd be for the ride.
Maybe I don't know your world,
maybe this is all the love you know.
I'm sorry, I never understood,
and maybe I will never know,
why you refuse to come in from the ice cold rain,
While I sit inside the warmth of the church,
longing, from a window sill,
watching you look back at me.
Have no fear, my dear,
I'm right here, so near.
let love rest your weary head,
In your arms is where I spend my days.
by me
I admit I asked for it to every time,
didn't know how long I'd be for the ride.
Maybe I don't know your world,
maybe this is all the love you know.
I'm sorry, I never understood,
and maybe I will never know,
why you refuse to come in from the ice cold rain,
While I sit inside the warmth of the church,
longing, from a window sill,
watching you look back at me.
Have no fear, my dear,
I'm right here, so near.
let love rest your weary head,
In your arms is where I spend my days.
L
My Realization
by me
Sometimes I forget how I am making you feel,
been so blind by my own deeds and trophies of glorification,
I never knew that your faith was real,
If God see's truth within the heart,
then Christ is all you need,
his love see's through everything.
Your faith will spark a wildfire with a tiny mustard seed.
I kept you down because you were so different,
you were not like me,
I thought myself better,
I compared our dirty hands unfairly,
but you hang in there,
burdened by the weight of the world,
trying to make it by,
If you have faith,
then we sit at the same table,
you and I.
I'm sorry I made you feel this way,
Sometime's I can be the biggest hypocrite and creep.
It takes a lifetime for me to realize and change,
and sometimes it only takes a dream.
by me
Sometimes I forget how I am making you feel,
been so blind by my own deeds and trophies of glorification,
I never knew that your faith was real,
If God see's truth within the heart,
then Christ is all you need,
his love see's through everything.
Your faith will spark a wildfire with a tiny mustard seed.
I kept you down because you were so different,
you were not like me,
I thought myself better,
I compared our dirty hands unfairly,
but you hang in there,
burdened by the weight of the world,
trying to make it by,
If you have faith,
then we sit at the same table,
you and I.
I'm sorry I made you feel this way,
Sometime's I can be the biggest hypocrite and creep.
It takes a lifetime for me to realize and change,
and sometimes it only takes a dream.
L
(through the worst fiery demonic terrorizing torments, this song surprisingly gave me peace..)
Jesus Freak
Lyrics by: DC Talk
Jesus Freak
Lyrics by: DC Talk
What will people think
When they hear that I'm a Jesus freak?
What will people do when they find that it's true?
I don't really care if they label me a Jesus freak
There ain't no disguising the truth.
When they hear that I'm a Jesus freak?
What will people do when they find that it's true?
I don't really care if they label me a Jesus freak
There ain't no disguising the truth.
[video=youtube;kbB0QrBIs9k]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kbB0QrBIs9k[/video]
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L
Dive
Lyrics by: DC Talk
I saw it all from my bubble on the 15th floor
Lyrics by: DC Talk
I saw it all from my bubble on the 15th floor
I was so unaware as I sank into my leather chair
Upon my throne I was known as untouchable
The smoke was creeping in
My castle walls were wearing thin
It took a fire to inspire me to make my move
Cigarette in a garbage can
Changed the ways of this corporate man
It was time for a radical plan
I took a dive
I took a love plunge into Your arms
I took a dive
I took a love plunge into Your arms
I took a dive
I jumped in with all my heart
I took a dive
Upon my throne I was known as untouchable
The smoke was creeping in
My castle walls were wearing thin
It took a fire to inspire me to make my move
Cigarette in a garbage can
Changed the ways of this corporate man
It was time for a radical plan
I took a dive
I took a love plunge into Your arms
I took a dive
I took a love plunge into Your arms
I took a dive
I jumped in with all my heart
I took a dive
Follow me through the door to the great unknown
Something was telling me that this would shape my destiny
Take my hand, understand You are not alone
Shame on me if I oppose the stirring of the Holy Ghost
Heard a voice calling out to me [out to me]
I come to set your spirit free [spirit free]
And in Me you are free indeed
....
I jumped in with all my heart
I took a dive
[video=youtube;jLehRSiOL0s]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jLehRSiOL0s[/video]
Something was telling me that this would shape my destiny
Take my hand, understand You are not alone
Shame on me if I oppose the stirring of the Holy Ghost
Heard a voice calling out to me [out to me]
I come to set your spirit free [spirit free]
And in Me you are free indeed
....
I jumped in with all my heart
I took a dive
[video=youtube;jLehRSiOL0s]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jLehRSiOL0s[/video]
L
Say The Words
Lyrics by: DC Talk
...
The word love,
well it was once overused
Back in the 70's the word was abused
But I refuse to let love be diluted
We can't allow physical lust to intrude it
Or pollute it
cause there ain't no excuse
For the greatest gift of all to be abused
So choose to lose the pride that may tug at you
Don't be afraid of the words
"I love you"
Say the words,
say the words,
say
"I love you"
Say the words
I long to hear
- DC Talk Lyrics
[video=youtube;HJgwQf_wAFg]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HJgwQf_wAFg[/video]
Lyrics by: DC Talk
...
The word love,
well it was once overused
Back in the 70's the word was abused
But I refuse to let love be diluted
We can't allow physical lust to intrude it
Or pollute it
cause there ain't no excuse
For the greatest gift of all to be abused
So choose to lose the pride that may tug at you
Don't be afraid of the words
"I love you"
Say the words,
say the words,
say
"I love you"
Say the words
I long to hear
- DC Talk Lyrics
[video=youtube;HJgwQf_wAFg]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HJgwQf_wAFg[/video]
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