The Visual Nature of Men

[GaryA]

Ladies:

I am writing this post to help you better understand the truth-in-reality concerning the 'visual' nature of men ( with regard to the body of a woman ).

First, I need to make a short explanation about something that I like to call "the six aspects of man" ( 'man', as in mankind; i.e., human beings ) -- which I will "borrow" from an earlier post:

The following are the characteristically distinguishable 'realms' of human existence - as determined by self-awareness:

~ Physical
~ Physiological
~ Psychological
~ Mental
~ Emotional
~ Spiritual

'Physical' is the realm of the passive components of the body.

'Physiological' is the realm of active processes of the body - where direct communication (electrical or chemical) occurs within a body component or between body components.

'Psychological' is the realm of active processes of the brain - where physical-reality perception-and-thought occur.

'Mental' is the realm of intellect - where the thought and reasoning of the mind occur.

'Emotional' is the realm of feelings/desires - where the thought and reasoning of the heart occur.

'Spiritual' is the realm of the living essence of the person.

Now - the main thing that I want to get across to you is -- when a man looks at the body of a woman, the initial [ base-level ] 'reaction' that he experiences occurs in the Physiological realm - not the Psychological, Mental, or Emotional realms, as you might think.

This is important for you to understand!

Yes - it may then "carry over" into these other realms; however, it begins in the Physiological realm.

Yes - it can be controlled, suppressed, or otherwise "dealt with" from / within these other realms; however, what happens in the Physiological realm is virtually and practically uncontrollable - largely because it is a perception kind of reaction.

It is like "a natural high in the brain" from the release of Endorphines, etc. - and is, in part, addictive in nature. This is why he has the propensity to "keep looking"...

The point is --- there is a lot more going on than just a simple, conscious, decision.

Another thing that I want to get across to you is -- just how incredibly powerful it is.

And, not only that, but - how incredibly "sensitive" a man is to the "stimulus" of the "visual cues / clues" of a woman's body.

In order to explain this without writing 15 paragraphs ... let me be very blunt:

The very smallest and slightest curvature of the very uppermost part of the cleavage between your breasts will capture his [ visual ] attention - "in a microsecond" - from twenty feet away - or possibly even one hundred feet away.

( "I am not kidding..." )

Men are - visually - incredibly sensitive - to the 'curves' - as well as, the 'color' and 'texture' of the skin - of a woman's body.

Now, I am not saying this to create any kind of excuse for the misbehavior of men - there is no excuse for that. Every man is ultimately responsible for his own actions.

However, please understand that - more than they realize - women are able - consciously or unconsciously - to tempt a man - by merely "showing some skin"...

 

[GaryA]

However, please understand that - more than they realize - women are able - consciously or unconsciously - to tempt a man - by merely "showing some skin"...

I meant this in the sense of "raising the level of temptation", or - a man being more apt to be tempted.

( i.e., "more skin" means "more temptation" )

It can also be very distracting to / for a man - because of the effect of the "stimulus" that he is being bombarded with...

 

[seoulsearch]

Hi Gary. Thanks for the reminder... As you've hopefully noticed, Still Waters made a thread about this very subject a few days ago, so us ladies have been very duly reminded several times over and then some to keep ourselves covered in gunny sacks, parkas, and turtle necks for the summer.

Keep in mind though, a good majority of the women here on this forum already know this and dress modestly, so when speaking to an audience of women, please also be considerate of the ones who are already doing so.

One thing I always get a kick out of when men talk about how "visual" they are... Do they somehow think that women are blind? Gentlemen, we SEE you just as well as you see us.

I have to say this is a bit of a personal thing for me, as I have, over the years, encountered many, many men who are going after the skinny-but-somehow-curvaceous model-type ladies, saying it's because they, as men, are "visual creatures" and that "God made them that way"... but they aren't doing much in the way of keeping their own bodies healthy or in shape.

I'm not at all saying that a man has to be a bodybuilder or WWF "actor". I watched "The Fast & The Furious 6" last week and it was like a Testosterone Explosion. Poor Paul Walker, he looked so tiny and delicate next to the other guys, you may as well have put him in a dress. And throughout the entire movie, I was thinking, "The Rock and Vin Diesel... have... NO necks. Their heads just sit on top of their bodies... somehow attached to a massive slab of shoulders..." Personally, I would very much like to find a guy who still has a neck... and therefore, still looks human.

I don't expect a movie star, but I work very hard to stay in some sort of shape (what's that old saying... "Round is a shape!" ) and want to find someone who believes in doing the same.

For all the Godly gentlemen out there, we appreciate you and want to encourage your walk with the Lord.

Remember, we women are not visually impaired. God gave us two eyeballs as well. Let's all work to keep ourselves living healthy, God-honoring lives in the way we take care of ourselves... and in the way we dress, whether we are a man or a woman.

Let's all work on keeping our bodies fit and healthy... as well as appropriately covered. I myself am a jeans and t-shirt girl and that seems to work for me.

 

[tourist]

I meant this in the sense of "raising the level of temptation", or - a man being more apt to be tempted.

( i.e., "more skin" means "more temptation" )

It can also be very distracting to / for a man - because of the effect of the "stimulus" that he is being bombarded with...

I will take my chances with these so-called distractions.

 

[MissCris]

Solution- men should wear blindfolds 24/7.

I'm kidding, relax.

 

[tourist]

Solution- men should wear blindfolds 24/7.

I'm kidding, relax.

You had me worried there about the blindfolds. Your small print was disconcerting though but I do appreciate the intended humor.

 

[seoulsearch]

Solution- men should wear blindfolds 24/7.

I'm kidding, relax.

There actually might be some truth to this, though of course I'm backing it as a joke as well.

But it's funny how different times and cultures dictate what's considered to be a "turn-on" regarding female bodies. I watched the movie "RIP Department" a few weeks ago and Jeff Bridge's character was from the 1800's. He was swooning to his partner about how he goes crazy over a woman's ankles (and his subsequent frustration with the fact that his current squeeze always covered hers in boots.)

Likewise, there are entire websites dedicated to things like men who are turned on by women's feet. And I've read about remote tribes in which the female upper body is not considered to be part of the sexual nature.

I totally understand that we all need to dress appropriately and modestly. But I always think it's interesting... and sometimes frightening... to note the wide variations in what men will consider to be a "temptation."

I'm thinking... maybe one of those head-to-toe radiation suits might be appropriate... (But only one in which the face can't be seen, of course.) Then again... gotta be careful.

I'm sure the helmet is bound to turn SOMEONE on.

 

[kenthomas27]

I see no reason to believe there's anything peculiar about the visual nature of men.

 

[MissCris]

There actually might be some truth to this, though of course I'm backing it as a joke as well.

But it's funny how different times and cultures dictate what's considered to be a "turn-on" regarding female bodies. I watched the movie "RIP Department" a few weeks ago and Jeff Bridge's character was from the 1800's. He was swooning to his partner about how he goes crazy over a woman's ankles (and his subsequent frustration with the fact that his current squeeze always covered hers in boots.)

Likewise, there are entire websites dedicated to things like men who are turned on by women's feet. And I've read about remote tribes in which the female upper body is not considered to be part of the sexual nature.

I totally understand that we all need to dress appropriately and modestly. But I always think it's interesting... and sometimes frightening... to note the wide variations in what men will consider to be a "temptation."

I'm thinking... maybe one of those head-to-toe radiation suits might be appropriate... (But only one in which the face can't be seen, of course.) Then again... gotta be careful.

I'm sure the helmet is bound to turn SOMEONE on.

Yes! How are women supposed to guard against all of that without just staying shut away in their homes? Blindfolding the male population seems reasonable

Really though, if women are covering the bits and pieces that Most guys pay attention to, we can't be held responsible for being a distraction to the ones who fantasize about, say, earlobes.

 

[hoss2576]

I get somewhat frustrated at this argument at times, because I feel like I get relegated to the level of an animal who cannot control himself if he sees a woman dressing inappropriately. Like everyone, I agree with ladies dressing modestly, and I will not be the one to define what that is. I will say though that I have to do my part too. I heard it put like this - we need to train ourselves to have bouncing eyes. If you are seeing more than you should, then look elsewhere. I understand it is not easy, but I keep feeling like we are throwing the women under the bus on this, when I have played my part as well.

 

[biscuit]

I get somewhat frustrated at this argument at times, because I feel like I get relegated to the level of an animal who cannot control himself if he sees a woman dressing inappropriately. Like everyone, I agree with ladies dressing modestly, and I will not be the one to define what that is. I will say though that I have to do my part too. I heard it put like this - we need to train ourselves to have bouncing eyes. If you are seeing more than you should, then look elsewhere. I understand it is not easy, but I keep feeling like we are throwing the women under the bus on this, when I have played my part as well.

Personally, I don't see anything wrong looking at a physically attractive woman. Just don't " get filled with lust and act upon it. If a Christian man can't control himself, then he should turn away from it.

 

[seoulsearch]

I think the other part of the equation that's equally important is self-discipline and self-control. The Bible tells all of us, whether a man or woman, to apply this principle in every area of our lives.

We are all responsible to God to have the self-control to choose how we dress as well as how we react to those in front of us.

 

[Loveneverfails]

I get somewhat frustrated at this argument at times, because I feel like I get relegated to the level of an animal who cannot control himself if he sees a woman dressing inappropriately. Like everyone, I agree with ladies dressing modestly, and I will not be the one to define what that is. I will say though that I have to do my part too. I heard it put like this - we need to train ourselves to have bouncing eyes. If you are seeing more than you should, then look elsewhere. I understand it is not easy, but I keep feeling like we are throwing the women under the bus on this, when I have played my part as well.

I get frustrated on your behalf, too. A lot of my Christian brothers deserve way more credit than this. You are not animals incapable of controlling yourselves. Yes, your sisters in Christ ought to dress with dignity (a relative term, depending on many factors such as culture, climate, and occasion), but the fact remains that there are millions of women out there who do not feel the same conviction to dress modestly. What are Christian men supposed to do about them? You can't tell a woman who doesn't serve God to dress in a way that honors Him. Let men strive toward godliness in their thoughts and actions regardless of what women do, and vice versa. The best we can pray for the opposite gender (or for anyone, really) is that the Holy Spirit would work in their hearts and convict them of whatever He sees fit. We cannot be one another's holy spirit. There is only One, and He knows what He's doing.

Also, I'd like to add that I firmly believe the visual nature of men is a good thing when it is surrendered to the headship of Christ. Within the confines of a godly marriage, isn't it a wonderful thing when a husband visually delights in his bride? I sure hope that's the case with my future husband!

 

[tourist]

I get frustrated on your behalf, too. A lot of my Christian brothers deserve way more credit than this. You are not animals incapable of controlling yourselves. Yes, your sisters in Christ ought to dress with dignity (a relative term, depending on many factors such as culture, climate, and occasion), but the fact remains that there are millions of women out there who do not feel the same conviction to dress modestly. What are Christian men supposed to do about them? You can't tell a woman who doesn't serve God to dress in a way that honors Him. Let men strive toward godliness in their thoughts and actions regardless of what women do, and vice versa. The best we can pray for the opposite gender (or for anyone, really) is that the Holy Spirit would work in their hearts and convict them of whatever He sees fit. We cannot be one another's holy spirit. There is only One, and He knows what He's doing.

Also, I'd like to add that I firmly believe the visual nature of men is a good thing when it is surrendered to the headship of Christ. Within the confines of a godly marriage, isn't it a wonderful thing when a husband visually delights in his bride? I sure hope that's the case with my future husband!

I am sure that it will be.

 

[BananaPie]

As Grandmother would say, "The strongest man is he who has self-control."

The reader may consider that prayer life disciplines one's senses, and in that vein, our perception of others is in comparison to the beauty of the Lord and nothing else.

 

[violakat]

Yes! How are women supposed to guard against all of that without just staying shut away in their homes? Blindfolding the male population seems reasonable

Really though, if women are covering the bits and pieces that Most guys pay attention to, we can't be held responsible for being a distraction to the ones who fantasize about, say, earlobes.

Wait, they're fantasizing about my ear lobes now. Eww, now I need to go find some ear muffs.

But in all seriousness, there is only so much one can do to cover up. Yes, we need to live modestly, and if you read my response the other day, you will realize how much I believe this. However, it gets a little annoying after you see several posts on women being modest, and nothing on men being modest. Hey men, I know some of you don't realize it, but women also have eyes. And while the way men dress effects us, to some extent, differently, it still effect us. This is not a one way street, but a two way.

 

[BananaPie]

The following are the characteristically distinguishable 'realms' of human existence.

~ Physical √
~ Physiological √
~ Psychological √
~ Mental √
~ Emotional √
~ Spiritual √

​Mooseburgers are so very agreeable in every aspect of a banana's life.

 

[secularhermit]

I meant this in the sense of "raising the level of temptation", or - a man being more apt to be tempted.

( i.e., "more skin" means "more temptation" )

It can also be very distracting to / for a man - because of the effect of the "stimulus" that he is being bombarded with...

Hi, Gary!

I want to hear it (or see it) written for us, somewhat blind.

 

[DuchessAimee]

I'm extremely sick of this argument, and honestly, it's a cop out.



One could argue that the sight of blood is stimulating, or a juicy steak, or a piece of art, or a myriad of other things. The retinas take in the information and the occipital lobe sends it to other places to be processed. It's been scientifically documented that ANYTHING can arouse an individual sexually, as long as the individual chooses to find it arousing. Meaning, you can literally train your physiology to do what you wish it to do.


That's why the bible says to guard your eye gates.


Now, men and women are basically turned on by the usual stuff, that's also scientifically documented. Kinsey and Johnson and Johnson conducted MASSIVE studies in the 40s/50s/60s and onto present day. Some men (or women) are more likely to become aroused visually when certain body parts are showing, or certain clothing is worn, etc. However, it's possible to change or completely turn off the physiology you mentioned. And the kicker is, it's quite easy when you choose to do it. Cognitive Behavioral therapy is very common and even biblical (read the Pauline scriptures).


I say this argument is a cop out because it is. Instead of teaching ourselves to be different and then walk in it, we let our biology control things it shouldn't. Remember, sin is in our biology. The bible says we can control our biology, we can control our sin.


When men make this argument, I understand. Really I do. I'm a visual creature and I appreciate good looking men. However, I don't argue that men need to dress a certain way. Who am I to boss someone (who I can't and shouldn't control) around? How they dress or how attractive they are isn't my problem. How I choose to notice and appreciate them IS my problem.


You don't get to blame girls for your lack of control, and I don't get to blame guys for my lack of control. If you can't control your eyes and your lust, take it up with Jesus, not with the objects of your obsession.

 

[seoulsearch]

Well as tempting as it is to saunter into these types of threads in a string bikini...

NOT.

The only part of my anatomy that will ever be adorned by strings are my feet... and that would be in the form of shoelaces.