Asking for honest feedback
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T
Can you imagine cheesecake stakes? They'd be useful against lactose-intolerant vampyres.
Vampyre slayer #1: Oh, no! He's not quite dead. He's just got the runs.
Vampyre slayer #2: And this one, he's broken out in a rash.
Vampyre slayer #3 Guys, I don't think this is working.
Vampyre slayer #1: Retreat!
Then again, maybe not.
Vampyre slayer #1: Oh, no! He's not quite dead. He's just got the runs.
Vampyre slayer #2: And this one, he's broken out in a rash.
Vampyre slayer #3 Guys, I don't think this is working.
Vampyre slayer #1: Retreat!
Then again, maybe not.
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Note: "you" is generic, cept for the bottom and top paragrphs
I have to say I appreciate the OP.
At one time I felt like you weren't giving an honest ear - not bullying, but I felt that you were somewhat concerned for me to be discussing such in light of babes in Christ that may be here on this site. And indeed, it was a highly controversial topic.
The first thing babes need to understand is being open to learning new things - because aside from salvation, the Christian walk is largely about expelling ignorance - doing so helps us better understand our neighbor, and ultimately God, whom our neighbor is in the image of.
Understanding God involves understanding other people, even when they do things that's like "don't you know that, uh duh." (general statement - not referencing anything specific) Someone you sympathize with is someone you are more likely to show compassion for - more likely to cultivate true, Agape love and mercy. But until we understand these other ideas and concepts that's uncomfortable, even what we would call sin, we will feel far less inclined to show people who are behave or think differently genuine Christ-like compassion.
Where (genuine, not put on) understanding is absent, certainty and blanket judgements are usually present - the kind that draws conclusions without having all the facts or even some of them. "That was wrong, plain and simple" and so there is nothing TO understand: no intentions, background, illness, nothing. "It was wrong and they should be ashamed, and if I show compassion then I'm condoning it." I see people, regardless of faith, react to strangers on the news this way ALL THE TIME, because right or wrong is judged by appearance... these people aren't usually concerned with understanding much less the heart that only God sees.
I think a very healthy way to cultivate understanding is to show it within our own Church and in sharing our diverse beliefs with healthy tolerance (not blind acceptance, but honestly listening and disagreeing without threatening the person with the rebuke/wrath of God). We show the babes how they should approach their neighbor: to seek not only to TELL people the Gospel, but to actually UNDERSTAND them and make them feel like they matter, rather than scoring another seat in the pews. People who feel understood are more inclined to try and understand YOU and what YOU have to say - for instance, the Gospel of Jesus Christ. It really is a Golden Rule behavior.
When a babe is shielded by one viewpoint, and taught that other viewpoints are heretical or immoral and must be avoided, you raise a Christian who sees discussion of spiritual topics as something adversarial, and will probably drive people away when witnessing - because that's what is modeled for the babe by older believers, in relation to doctrine.
That's one thing that repels me about the idea of absolute truth, in not only the Gospel but all these little what I call "side details." Two churches who worship differently, but believe their style to be absolute and singularly correct, are not going to coexist in harmony - because they don't see sisters and brothers in that other church, they see enemies or hindering of the Gospel, stumbling blocks with their heretical doctrines. This ultimately fragments the Body, and it must - because two opposing absolute truths (notice I say absolute, not opposing ideas/beliefs) will not exist together peacefully, especially as sinners.
Jesus said they know you by the love you show each other. Most unbelievers see hypocrisy, and they DON'T see Christians or believers in Christ because they don't show understanding or compassion to people who believe in the SAME God.
And, I imagine they reason, "if they can't get along with each other, why should I think they will accept me, who hasn't even formed an opinion yet?"
You're right. One that is not teachable can not grow, adapt or learn. And technically, everyone is teachable, in the sense that no one knows everything.
And you know, this is something I struggle with too. I can be a bit blunt, in some things I say, and I apologize for that to anyone recently. But like you, I am trying to learn to be more mild.
And I also want to point out that sometimes disagreement in any fashion is perceived as bullying - for some people, the rebuke of Mother Teresa would be bullying and cruel.
And where as I DO try not to interpret text by my initial reaction (which is subjective, since text in and of itself is hard to decipher tone-wise), many people will react on their impulse. Sometimes lovingly confronting such folks yield that they are NOT a troll, just had a moment of weakness - like us all.
As far as we are concerned, I think we got back on the right foot, and there's no issue. It wasn't even bad - we didn't insult each other, name-call, or any of this. But since I've had more time to reflect and write about my thoughts in other places, I hope this post clarifies any lukewarmness that is perceived, compromise, or whatnot that I put off.
Blessings sister.
I have to say I appreciate the OP.
At one time I felt like you weren't giving an honest ear - not bullying, but I felt that you were somewhat concerned for me to be discussing such in light of babes in Christ that may be here on this site. And indeed, it was a highly controversial topic.
The first thing babes need to understand is being open to learning new things - because aside from salvation, the Christian walk is largely about expelling ignorance - doing so helps us better understand our neighbor, and ultimately God, whom our neighbor is in the image of.
Understanding God involves understanding other people, even when they do things that's like "don't you know that, uh duh." (general statement - not referencing anything specific) Someone you sympathize with is someone you are more likely to show compassion for - more likely to cultivate true, Agape love and mercy. But until we understand these other ideas and concepts that's uncomfortable, even what we would call sin, we will feel far less inclined to show people who are behave or think differently genuine Christ-like compassion.
Where (genuine, not put on) understanding is absent, certainty and blanket judgements are usually present - the kind that draws conclusions without having all the facts or even some of them. "That was wrong, plain and simple" and so there is nothing TO understand: no intentions, background, illness, nothing. "It was wrong and they should be ashamed, and if I show compassion then I'm condoning it." I see people, regardless of faith, react to strangers on the news this way ALL THE TIME, because right or wrong is judged by appearance... these people aren't usually concerned with understanding much less the heart that only God sees.
I think a very healthy way to cultivate understanding is to show it within our own Church and in sharing our diverse beliefs with healthy tolerance (not blind acceptance, but honestly listening and disagreeing without threatening the person with the rebuke/wrath of God). We show the babes how they should approach their neighbor: to seek not only to TELL people the Gospel, but to actually UNDERSTAND them and make them feel like they matter, rather than scoring another seat in the pews. People who feel understood are more inclined to try and understand YOU and what YOU have to say - for instance, the Gospel of Jesus Christ. It really is a Golden Rule behavior.
When a babe is shielded by one viewpoint, and taught that other viewpoints are heretical or immoral and must be avoided, you raise a Christian who sees discussion of spiritual topics as something adversarial, and will probably drive people away when witnessing - because that's what is modeled for the babe by older believers, in relation to doctrine.
That's one thing that repels me about the idea of absolute truth, in not only the Gospel but all these little what I call "side details." Two churches who worship differently, but believe their style to be absolute and singularly correct, are not going to coexist in harmony - because they don't see sisters and brothers in that other church, they see enemies or hindering of the Gospel, stumbling blocks with their heretical doctrines. This ultimately fragments the Body, and it must - because two opposing absolute truths (notice I say absolute, not opposing ideas/beliefs) will not exist together peacefully, especially as sinners.
Jesus said they know you by the love you show each other. Most unbelievers see hypocrisy, and they DON'T see Christians or believers in Christ because they don't show understanding or compassion to people who believe in the SAME God.
And, I imagine they reason, "if they can't get along with each other, why should I think they will accept me, who hasn't even formed an opinion yet?"
You're right. One that is not teachable can not grow, adapt or learn. And technically, everyone is teachable, in the sense that no one knows everything.
And you know, this is something I struggle with too. I can be a bit blunt, in some things I say, and I apologize for that to anyone recently. But like you, I am trying to learn to be more mild.
And I also want to point out that sometimes disagreement in any fashion is perceived as bullying - for some people, the rebuke of Mother Teresa would be bullying and cruel.
And where as I DO try not to interpret text by my initial reaction (which is subjective, since text in and of itself is hard to decipher tone-wise), many people will react on their impulse. Sometimes lovingly confronting such folks yield that they are NOT a troll, just had a moment of weakness - like us all.As far as we are concerned, I think we got back on the right foot, and there's no issue. It wasn't even bad - we didn't insult each other, name-call, or any of this. But since I've had more time to reflect and write about my thoughts in other places, I hope this post clarifies any lukewarmness that is perceived, compromise, or whatnot that I put off.
Blessings sister.
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S
If you're a bully Ole...then gosh I don't even know what I am as I can be overly sarcastic with my comments ... anywho, you're fine! As others have said you convey grace and kindness in your responses, there is zero attacking and it's always respectful and shows lots of consideration!
... anywho, you're fine! As others have said you convey grace and kindness in your responses, there is zero attacking and it's always respectful and shows lots of consideration!
Now that we've gotten to the heart of the matter, let's all discuss cheesecake.
Did anyone else notice that Tintin spelled vampire wrong? Those crazy Aussies and their Queen's English.
Forgive me if my post was "over the top" but it wasn't meant to expand on anything specific; I just thought it was relevant since you asked if there was anything we had commentary on.
And I'm the type that sits down with two sentences in mind and end up writing two pages. lol
I start writing and one idea flows into another. But yeah, I have a lot to work on too. Brevity and applicability is among them.
And I'm the type that sits down with two sentences in mind and end up writing two pages. lol
I start writing and one idea flows into another. But yeah, I have a lot to work on too. Brevity and applicability is among them.
B
Forgive me if my post was "over the top" but it wasn't meant to expand on anything specific; I just thought it was relevant since you asked if there was anything we had commentary on.
And I'm the type that sits down with two sentences in mind and end up writing two pages. lol
I start writing and one idea flows into another. But yeah, I have a lot to work on too. Brevity and applicability is among them.
And I'm the type that sits down with two sentences in mind and end up writing two pages. lol
I start writing and one idea flows into another. But yeah, I have a lot to work on too. Brevity and applicability is among them.
Some may call it negative, but I think what it came down to is maybe she or I or both misinterpreted the tone or intentions of the posts. But nothing major, I don't think, and she handled it really well - certainly didn't get hostile or bullyish about the disagreement, but as someone else stated: direct. She doesn't hold back convictions for politeness sake, and that's awesome. It was a "hot topic" if you will, among the Christian community. And actually, I believe our 'butting heads,' if you will, was a one time occurrence. I just don't want to address the context directly here, cos I don't want to derail her thread.
But thank you, I appreciate the support for the post.
But thank you, I appreciate the support for the post.
I will say that in not-written communication, I'm a whole lot lighter than I come off here. Not less thoughtful, but more sarcastic, and I play with words more. Tone in written conversation is important because so much can be misunderstood.