At what age does a person become a grown up?

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Oncefallen

Oncefallen

Idiot in Chief
Staff member
#41
Jan 15, 2011
6,062
3,413
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#41
1christian1 said:
I don't get it.. Is this the reason men in their twenties Don't have the ability to take responsibility for themselves and grow up...
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When you look at how culture has shifted in the past 50 years one of the things that has been predominantly lost in our young men is the desire to grow up and be a man, some social commentators have called it the Peter Pan Syndrome.

It wasn't too far back in western culture that young men (teens) looked forward to the day that they would be considered a man within their community whereas now many don't want anything to do with what would be considered "adulthood" predominantly because of a nasty word known as responsibility.

Most "primitive" cultures have some form of a rite of passage that a young man goes through before he is considered a man by his community but western culture has lost that although some Christian communities have actually worked towards returning to some form of a rite of passage for their young men because with it seems to bring the expectation (and desire within the boys) of "growing up".

To answer the OP, IMHO, there is no age that determines being "grown up." I've known kids that were 13 or 14 that were "grown up" and I've known persons who were in their 60's that just
 
1christian1

1christian1

Banned
#42
Sep 13, 2018
2,587
885
113
#42
Sweetmorningdew78 said:
Oh my! :eek: I am sorry 😨 I thought... Oh goodness 😳 I am sorry 1christian1 :(
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That's okay Sweet morning.. I have been both mother and father To my daughter since she was 5... Good to know that I am doing a stand up job in that department as well... LOL...
 
H

Hamarr

Guest
#43
#43
Oncefallen said:
When you look at how culture has shifted in the past 50 years one of the things that has been predominantly lost in our young men is the desire to grow up and be a man, some social commentators have called it the Peter Pan Syndrome.

It wasn't too far back in western culture that young men (teens) looked forward to the day that they would be considered a man within their community whereas now many don't want anything to do with what would be considered "adulthood" predominantly because of a nasty word known as responsibility.

Most "primitive" cultures have some form of a rite of passage that a young man goes through before he is considered a man by his community but western culture has lost that although some Christian communities have actually worked towards returning to some form of a rite of passage for their young men because with it seems to bring the expectation (and desire within the boys) of "growing up".

To answer the OP, IMHO, there is no age that determines being "grown up." I've known kids that were 13 or 14 that were "grown up" and I've known persons who were in their 60's that just
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Yeah. I think a lot of it is also growing up without a father around. I raised most of my life by a single mom. She had no idea what a man was supposed to be. There weren't a lot of positive male role models in my life, even with going to church regularly. I did meet someone for discipleship while I was in high school, but it seemed all he had was getting on my case about not working (which I was doing at the time). This would be one of those areas where it would be nice to give some guidance from people in the church for younger men, especially those from broken homes. Maybe women could use this, too?

I went to CR a few weeks back and it struck me how some of these guys were on their last try to get clean before they spent the rest of their lives in jail. They ended up in a facility where they were working on getting clean while being discipled. For at least a couple of them, that's the first them they had ever had someone to look up to in their lives helping guide them in making the right decisions. Gregory Boyle talks about this sort of thing in Barking At the Choir, as well.

I recently read a book called Absent Fathers, Lost Sons that went into a bit more about the lack of rituals. The masculine rebirth when you become an adult. It would be nice to have something like this. Since reading that, I have chosen to seek out older men to look up to. I am getting a late start on a lot of this, though.

Sweetmorningdew78 said:
At work I call my employer sir, I call the stranger in the bus sir The teller in the bank sir The garbage man sir :) It is my way to show respect and courtesy to strangers, my employer, everyone and also to the people miles away from me that I respect :)
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Oh, I am mostly kidding. It is respectful, but I feel like such a kid at times it is a bit jarring when I am reminded of my age relative to others. I had a similar experience during my exam recently. The guy is talking to me about how eyes don't shift from near to far view as easily once you hit your 40s, and I felt like a 10 year old sitting in that exam chair.
 
1christian1

1christian1

Banned
#44
Sep 13, 2018
2,587
885
113
#44
Sweetmorningdew78 said:
Thank you sis ❤ and you are a great mom ❤ Sis I remember this verse :)

Proverbs 22:6

6 Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.

Blessings ❤
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1christian1 said:
That's okay Sweet morning.. I have been both mother and father To my daughter since she was 5... Good to know that I am doing a stand up job in that department as well... LOL...
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And I do apologize Sweet morning... You must have grown up without a father. Or one that was abusive..
 
S

Sweetmorningdew78

Guest
#45
#45
1christian1 said:
And I do apologize Sweet morning... You must have grown up without a father. Or one that was abusive..
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Don't be sorry 😅 My father is not perfect but in my eyes he is the best 💪❤

1christian1 said:
That's okay Sweet morning.. I have been both mother and father To my daughter since she was 5... Good to know that I am doing a stand up job in that department as well... LOL...
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I truly admire parents like you :) I know I don't have any idea how much you sacrificed and how much you are sacrificing to raise your daughter but I want you to know that you are amazing! single parents are strong and very hardworking :) imagine caring for your daughter 24 hours everyday... That is absolutely admirable. God bless you and your daughter. You are a great dad ❤
 
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