Coming On Too Strong

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Demi777

Senior Member
Oct 13, 2014
6,508
1,436
113
Germany
#41
So how about getting off of the alcohol (no good woman wants to deal with a drunk, but even less a disrespectful angry one) and starr working on yourself. Take ur angry thoughts captive, dont waste ur time in evil and mean cycles.
I am sure u can find a good woman if u r willing to work on yourself
 

melita916

Senior Member
Aug 12, 2011
9,670
1,656
113
#42
I can understand the frustration. For a long time, I felt I was “too much of this” or “not enough of that,” and as a result, no man wanted me. But the root of my problem was low self esteem. If I didn’t like myself, then why should someone else like me?

In the end, I needed more of the Holy Spirit to help me take every thought captive to the obedience of Christ. I needed His heart. I’m still a work in progress, but I like myself more today than I did 5 yrs ago lol
 

Mel85

Daughter of the True King
Mar 28, 2018
7,818
4,113
113
#43
I can understand the frustration. For a long time, I felt I was “too much of this” or “not enough of that,” and as a result, no man wanted me. But the root of my problem was low self esteem. If I didn’t like myself, then why should someone else like me?

In the end, I needed more of the Holy Spirit to help me take every thought captive to the obedience of Christ. I needed His heart. I’m still a work in progress, but I like myself more today than I did 5 yrs ago lol
I always like reading your responses but I notice that you always put a “lol” at the end of them hah
 

cinder

Senior Member
Mar 26, 2014
2,981
944
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#45
Has anybody ever wondered how so many christian pastors can give assert God's being so providential in our intimate relationships, while we are the ones who either repel or draw romantic partners? If you're the type who has a tendency to come on too strong, and have repelled (scared) more women away because of your intense personality...isn't it logical to assume God isn't really so involved in this regard when you come on too strong to potential dating partners? (Seriously, I've never understood this and wanted other christians advice because I'm single based on the awkward, intense, and weird person I am. I don't see what part God has to play in all of this, if any..?

Seems to me that if you think your big difficulty is coming on too strong, then you need to develop strategies to moderate how strong you are coming on. Very few women (especially women worth having) are going to respond well to a man they've rarely or never interacted with before coming up to them and pouring out his heart about how in love with her he is. But if you can mention a characteristic or two that has caught your eye and tell her you'd like a chance to get to know her better over coffee, your chances of things going somewhere dramatically go up. And yes God can be a great ally because no one knows better than he does when you should keep your mouth shut or when you should speak or when your first impression was unfavorable but maybe you should realize that this person is just awkward and not creepy.

As far as is God involved or not, I'll defer to one of my favorite dead guys (since I just reread this last night):

If to myself God sometimes interferes I said
My faith at once would be struck blind
I see him all in all the lifing mind
Or nowhere in the vacant miles and years
A love he is that watches and that hears
Or but a mist fumed up from minds of men
Whose fear and hope reach out beyond their ken

All that to say that God is involved with every aspect of life, or else we can find explanations for everything that exclude him.
 

cwizzle07

Active member
Jan 18, 2019
184
165
43
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#46
Am going to bed now. Please pray for me. I've repelled recently three extremely good-looking, interesting and godly christian women because I asked too many questions and came on too strong. Usually when I get in this mood the temptation for me to drink is rather on the high end of the spectrum. God bless.
Hello,
Maybe try being more aloof? Always leave em wanting more...
 

Oncefallen

Idiot in Chief
Staff member
Jan 15, 2011
5,349
1,308
113
#47
The OP is no longer with us so no need to continue this thread.
 
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