Do you enjoy your singleness?

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Butterflyyy

Well-known member
Oct 31, 2019
814
713
93
#81
I do appreciate your sentiment.
But I have depression as well, so self condemnation is a bit inevitable and severe naturally.
My situations have been spiraling into worse and worse things my entire life. I sometimes wish to go back to the times when I was homeless as that time seemed better than now.
Also I came to discover, after 30 years of being a Christian, I am not predestined to be saved, therefore following God is something that does not seem worthwhile. So I have learnt trusting God is often more dangerous.
Oh Sub please forgive me if it feels like I am bombarding you I just have this other song for you that came to me in the Spirit... my trials are hard and have been for a long time... but God is also giving me grace and helping me and working it all for the good of my family and I... and He led me to this site and dear brothers and sister she on here are praying for me ... anyway, I reckon after the last few days I've had well weeks, months, years ugh it is a miracle I found myself singing this and meaning it... I am reminded of the scripture that IF WE YIELD ourselves unto the Lord and resist the enemy he will flee...I had to ask God to help me yield to Him in a particular area and He enabled me as I literally broke my heart to Him... and then I got a breakthrough and my prayers are no longer hindered... anyways here's the other song...

This is the day, This is the day,
That the Lord has made
That the Lord has made
We will rejoice, we will rejoice
and be glad in it, and be glad in it....

This is the day that the Lord has made
We will rejoice and be glad in it
This is the day, this is the day
That the Lord has made....

And by His grace we will....X
 

Butterflyyy

Well-known member
Oct 31, 2019
814
713
93
#82
Oh Sub please forgive me if it feels like I am bombarding you I just have this other song for you that came to me in the Spirit... my trials are hard and have been for a long time... but God is also giving me grace and helping me and working it all for the good of my family and I... and He led me to this site and dear brothers and sister she on here are praying for me ... anyway, I reckon after the last few days I've had well weeks, months, years ugh it is a miracle I found myself singing this and meaning it... I am reminded of the scripture that IF WE YIELD ourselves unto the Lord and resist the enemy he will flee...I had to ask God to help me yield to Him in a particular area and He enabled me as I literally broke my heart to Him... and then I got a breakthrough and my prayers are no longer hindered... anyways here's the other song...

This is the day, This is the day,
That the Lord has made
That the Lord has made
We will rejoice, we will rejoice
and be glad in it, and be glad in it....

This is the day that the Lord has made
We will rejoice and be glad in it
This is the day, this is the day
That the Lord has made....

And by His grace we will....X
I do appreciate your sentiment.
But I have depression as well, so self condemnation is a bit inevitable and severe naturally.
My situations have been spiraling into worse and worse things my entire life. I sometimes wish to go back to the times when I was homeless as that time seemed better than now.
Also I came to discover, after 30 years of being a Christian, I am not predestined to be saved, therefore following God is something that does not seem worthwhile. So I have learnt trusting God is often more dangerous.
He is able to make all grace abound towards us...
Our light affliction which is but for a moment is working for us a far more eternal weight of glory
So this life and its suffering is gonna seem shorter than a blink when we are in Heaven for ever👌and all our suffering I a gonna be easily worth it... and He says that when we are in the furnace He is in it with us...

I hope I am being a help... because then it makes me see that my suffering has helped me to help you.... and we are afterall just helping one another find our way home🙏🏻
 

Butterflyyy

Well-known member
Oct 31, 2019
814
713
93
#83
I do appreciate your sentiment.
But I have depression as well, so self condemnation is a bit inevitable and severe naturally.
My situations have been spiraling into worse and worse things my entire life. I sometimes wish to go back to the times when I was homeless as that time seemed better than now.
Also I came to discover, after 30 years of being a Christian, I am not predestined to be saved, therefore following God is something that does not seem worthwhile. So I have learnt trusting God is often more dangerous.
And one last thought... for those who walk in the Spirit and not after the flesh there is now NO condemnation-so if God doesn't condemn you why should you condemn yourself? (I am going to try and remember that myself next time that thought tries to trip ME up😁)
I heard once that depression is when a negative thought/ fiery dart is fired into our mind and we accept it... then another one... and another til we are floored... so I reckon we got to ' Take every thought captive unto Christ'... and one thing I know is that He loves you and me more than we can comprehend😌
 

G00WZ

Senior Member
May 16, 2014
863
192
43
33
#84
I struggle sometimes with the fact that God said it's not good for man to be alone, and yet so many Christians are alone and desperately don't want to be. 🤔
Desire for good is good, but sometimes that desire in desperation can become an idol. God will not give another god to a person, but instead to have those things, said person has to learn to cast them down first. I remember a long time ago money was my idol, and every day i would just focus on getting it 7 days a week, no Sabbath- day of rest, it was money time all the time. One Friday i decided to just serve God on the weekend like i knew i should even though i knew i would be missing out. That Friday evening i just put in some random low-ball nonsense investment offers in that i didn't expect to get anything from (literally as a joke, but still planting a seed). That weekend i served God completely and didn't really do anything else, i didn't log in to check to see if any of my investments went through. Sunday night when the day was pretty much over i had noticed that my low-ball nonsense invested offers all had bought. I immediately sold them all off in 1 hour. I made the exact profit margin that i expected/hoped to have made if i just did it my way,except for it would have taken all day for both days combined....He taught me many lessons that day, like the main one is He is more valuable than the things i was chasing before. The others are found in the scripture references below.

Exodus 23:25 And ye shall serve the LORD your God, and he shall bless thy bread, and thy water; and I will take sickness away from the midst of thee.

Matthew 6:33 But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.

and all of Leviticus 26

But i get it though, the struggle, everyone has something they struggle with.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
5,837
2,218
113
#85
When God said it isnt good for man to be alone, I will make a helper for him, he meant Adam who was the only man on the entire earth at the time!

Now there are heaps of people around. So how can people say they are alone. We all come from families right? Unless you are living out in the sticks, or choose to be alone, how can you really be alone?

Being single doesnt mean you are always by yourself esp cos God is always around. And He sends us the helper. Now Jesus didnt say he would all send us WIVES. (If Im mistaken and he did, then wheres mine? Lol) but we all have mothers, and brothers and sisters, and dads and aunties and uncles and friends and pets surely.

He puts the lonely in families. Now if yor parents are no longer here, then maybe God will send you someone else to be part of your family, but I dont think people should complain about the family or friends they ALREADY have. Get to know them better.
 

BrotherMike

Be Still and Know
Jan 8, 2018
965
1,075
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#86
Sometimes I do since I’m an introvert, sometimes I don’t. Bottom line we were created for relationships (God first) and nothing more I would want than to have someone to hold and go through life with her IF she is the right one for each other.
 

BrotherMike

Be Still and Know
Jan 8, 2018
965
1,075
93
#87
I struggle sometimes with the fact that God said it's not good for man to be alone, and yet so many Christians are alone and desperately don't want to be. 🤔
Anyone I find desperate I run the other way! Lol Finding the right one to grow in Christ and who gives you peace from the Holy Spirit and is equally yoked is the most important. Unfortunately not every Christian gives me peace so as I wait I’ll worship Him. My heart and soul will be protected first.
 

Kuks

New member
Nov 14, 2019
4
3
3
#88
I am enjoying my singleness that doesn't mean I'm not looking forward to marrying someday. I'm not desperate about marriage . My vision must go on and my life must go on. That's what I will account for someday anyway...lol . But when the Lord blesses me someday hallelujah till then life goes on and I enjoy them. Sometimes my mum will ask me , " are you sure you want to marry ?", just because she thinks I'm too content but ......
 

Butterflyyy

Well-known member
Oct 31, 2019
814
713
93
#89
Anyone I find desperate I run the other way! Lol Finding the right one to grow in Christ and who gives you peace from the Holy Spirit and is equally yoked is the most important. Unfortunately not every Christian gives me peace so as I wait I’ll worship Him. My heart and soul will be protected first.
Desperately not wanting to be alone doesn't necessarily mean someone is 'desperate' if you get what I mean lol...I just mean I hate being without a husband, someone to hold me and to love... but unless the person is God's choice for me I wouldn't want to get involved with it...
 

Kim82

Well-known member
Jun 17, 2018
737
657
93
#90
Also I came to discover, after 30 years of being a Christian, I am not predestined to be saved, therefore following God is something that does not seem worthwhile. So I have learnt trusting God is often more dangerous.
Excuse me now, but I have to stop you right there in your tracks.

The poor man Lazarus, who eat the crumbs from the rich man's table. I don't think he felt predestined.

When Lot had sores on his body, and his wife advised him to curse God and die. I wonder if he felt predestined?

When Stephen was stoned to death, I wonder if he felt predestined?

When Ruth was going through the field, picking up left overs, I wander what she was thinking?

Just because you are suffering, don't let that turn you aside from God. Don't let that stop you from trusting Him.

Take it to the Lord in prayer. He understands our every weakness (Hebrews 4:15)

Jesus may have felt just like you when he was on the cross. That's why He said, my God, my God why have you forsaken me? (Matthew 27:46)

Don't give up. Fight the good fight of faith (1 Timothy 6:12)
 

Subhumanoidal

Well-known member
Sep 17, 2018
1,696
1,402
113
#91
Excuse me now, but I have to stop you right there in your tracks.

The poor man Lazarus, who eat the crumbs from the rich man's table. I don't think he felt predestined.

When Lot had sores on his body, and his wife advised him to curse God and die. I wonder if he felt predestined?

When Stephen was stoned to death, I wonder if he felt predestined?

When Ruth was going through the field, picking up left overs, I wander what she was thinking?

Just because you are suffering, don't let that turn you aside from God. Don't let that stop you from trusting Him.

Take it to the Lord in prayer. He understands our every weakness (Hebrews 4:15)

Jesus may have felt just like you when he was on the cross. That's why He said, my God, my God why have you forsaken me? (Matthew 27:46)

Don't give up. Fight the good fight of faith (1 Timothy 6:12)
I already gave up a while ago Two years ago, i believe. And quite honestly none of those stories affect me in the slightest. I am not those people. And i don't pray anymore. It did me no good as a Christian i don't foresee it working for me now. God certainly has made zero effort to change my mind or prove me wrong in the past two years. It would seem He can't be bothered.
 

laughingheart

Senior Member
Sep 21, 2016
1,120
1,036
113
#92
This is a hard question as it isn't up to someone else to fill the void in my life. I have so many blessings and I acknowledge them, but I am also lonely. I try to focus on all the perks of being single. I never have to have the golf channel on in my home. The closet is all mine. I can make any meal I choose. I can visit with friends after church and go for lunch. I can be quiet when I want and explore different art forms. I can be the ultimate sci fi geek and not have to apologize for liking vintage monster movies, going to a fan expo or reading a comic book. I can bake up a traditional Mennonite feast of breads, strudels and pies and not be criticized for not cooking keto vegan fusion (long story). I do not have to feel ashamed when I am not well and need to rest. I am allowed to be kind to myself.
On the lonelier days I miss holding hands or leaning my head on a loved one's shoulder. I miss knowing that out there, there is someone whose day is better because we shared it. I miss having a partner. I turned 55 today. I have my girlfriends. My family is not nearby but I know I'll hear from my mom. My son will give me a hug and my dog will be oblivious to everything but trying to get more food. I still wish there was that special someone. Maybe my time for finding love it done but I am not going to know that until my journey is done. Right now I need to work on my health so I know God has me where I should be. For now I will enjoy what is good about being single and if that changes I will enjoy the benefits of that too. Big hugs to all of you.
 
I

IFOLLOWHIM

Guest
#93
I already gave up a while ago Two years ago, i believe. And quite honestly none of those stories affect me in the slightest. I am not those people. And i don't pray anymore. It did me no good as a Christian i don't foresee it working for me now. God certainly has made zero effort to change my mind or prove me wrong in the past two years. It would seem He can't be bothered.


I am so sorry!
 

MegMarch

Well-known member
Nov 11, 2019
325
324
63
#94
This is a hard question as it isn't up to someone else to fill the void in my life. I have so many blessings and I acknowledge them, but I am also lonely. I try to focus on all the perks of being single. I never have to have the golf channel on in my home. The closet is all mine. I can make any meal I choose. I can visit with friends after church and go for lunch. I can be quiet when I want and explore different art forms. I can be the ultimate sci fi geek and not have to apologize for liking vintage monster movies, going to a fan expo or reading a comic book. I can bake up a traditional Mennonite feast of breads, strudels and pies and not be criticized for not cooking keto vegan fusion (long story). I do not have to feel ashamed when I am not well and need to rest. I am allowed to be kind to myself.
On the lonelier days I miss holding hands or leaning my head on a loved one's shoulder. I miss knowing that out there, there is someone whose day is better because we shared it. I miss having a partner. I turned 55 today. I have my girlfriends. My family is not nearby but I know I'll hear from my mom. My son will give me a hug and my dog will be oblivious to everything but trying to get more food. I still wish there was that special someone. Maybe my time for finding love it done but I am not going to know that until my journey is done. Right now I need to work on my health so I know God has me where I should be. For now I will enjoy what is good about being single and if that changes I will enjoy the benefits of that too. Big hugs to all of you.
A couple at my small group recently married 5 years ago. They are in their late 60s. They were so adorable. The woman said God was finally fulfilling the desires of her heart after 40 years of waiting. Just reminded me of his faithfulness.
 

BenFTW

Senior Member
Oct 7, 2012
4,567
708
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#95
I wouldn’t say I enjoy it, it is more so an ever present longing, a time of endurance. It weighs heavy on the heart because I only want to love. Yet I find myself also hating myself for perceived inadequacies and having to face them in this time. I feel so self conscious about myself and the Lord has promised me peace. So in singleness I am being healed, made presentable, so that I am able to have the relationship God is setting up.

Is that too real? It’s not that I hate singleness, it’s that I know I’m called to love her one day. So I wait, and am being prepared.
 

Mel85

Daughter of the True King
Mar 28, 2018
9,652
5,904
113
#96
I wouldn’t say I enjoy it, it is more so an ever present longing, a time of endurance. It weighs heavy on the heart because I only want to love. Yet I find myself also hating myself for perceived inadequacies and having to face them in this time. I feel so self conscious about myself and the Lord has promised me peace. So in singleness I am being healed, made presentable, so that I am able to have the relationship God is setting up.

Is that too real? It’s not that I hate singleness, it’s that I know I’m called to love her one day. So I wait, and am being prepared.
All this time I thought you were married 🤣🤣
 

BenFTW

Senior Member
Oct 7, 2012
4,567
708
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#97
All this time I thought you were married 🤣🤣
Haha, nope. Just waiting for “the one.” Our paths have met, and the Lord has been speaking to me of her. Of us. So I guess I’m no longer waiting to meet her, so much so as waiting to be walking into the love God has birthed. His providence in me for her and His providence in her for me. It’s in His timing and we are both being prepared for each other.
 

Mikhal

Active member
Nov 15, 2019
155
112
43
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#98
I already gave up a while ago Two years ago, i believe. And quite honestly none of those stories affect me in the slightest. I am not those people. And i don't pray anymore. It did me no good as a Christian i don't foresee it working for me now. God certainly has made zero effort to change my mind or prove me wrong in the past two years. It would seem He can't be bothered.
I love you, Brother..Tons.
Since reading this, you have been on my mind alot, and I truly, absolutely Love you 😊🙏. I Pray you are having a bright day. I wish I could hang out with you and Pray together.
 

BrotherMike

Be Still and Know
Jan 8, 2018
965
1,075
93
#99
I just want to be an encouragement to those who have given up or is down on being single. It's ok to be single! If anything we can use this extra time when we are lonely to improve ourselves spiritually, mentally, and physically. Some have waited decades to find the right one. God's timing > our timing. Bask in God's presence and trust in Him as we wait for His timing to be fulfilled. Matthew 6:33 and Psalm 37:4 says it all... I know God wants what's best for us, never underestimate His will and plan for our lives. The joy of the Lord is our strength! Hugs to you all!
 

mailmandan

Senior Member
Apr 7, 2014
19,737
8,145
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It would be nice to have someone, but I manage okay being single. IMO, there are worse things than being alone.
Proverbs 21:19 (NKJV) - Better to dwell in the wilderness, Than with a contentious and angry woman. :giggle: