FOR SINGLES ONLY

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how often do you desire/think about having a gf/bf?

  • every waking moment

    Votes: 7 11.5%
  • every now and then

    Votes: 35 57.4%
  • rarely

    Votes: 13 21.3%
  • i dont want a bf/gf

    Votes: 6 9.8%

  • Total voters
    61
A

arwen83

Guest
#21
The Scarecrow got a lady??? Are you sure Arwen? I think maybe you should ask the Wizard for a script of the movie before you ask him for anything else - lol.
hahaha it was my attempt at being witty
 
H

Hellooo

Guest
#23
I always liked Sarahs story, particularly how she laughed so much at the idea of being an older mom, when she was formerly barren. makes me feel like God has this great sense of humor, and Sarah was able to kind of laugh at herself and the whole absurdity of her situation.

The topic of infertility and older women pregnancy/parenting strangely enough has come up several times in conversation this week for me....made me wonder a little if I need to be thinking about kids, but I don't even buy houseplants...the responsibility seems too great right now. I like returning kiddos back to their parents when I've had enough. If sarah was popping out kids in her old age, I figure I'm fine focusing on other things for now. you'll be fine too, God's timing is perfect :)
 

Nautilus

Senior Member
Jun 29, 2012
6,488
53
48
#24
Well the way I figure, is I have to meet a guy, if we both decide that we love each other and take it to the next level, we get married, then have a child/children. I'm 29, without a boyfriend and no prospects. The chances of all this happening by 35 is slim. The older a woman gets, the higher the chance of miscarriage or the child having birth defects. So it gets me feeling panicky. I've just made myself depressed lol.

But scripture says, do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. I am seriously considering going around and getting other peoples signatures on my petition! God's gotta get moving if there are like 20 people on my list that believe I should meet my husband soon (I say that jokingly...sort of)
We could make a deal and say if we are both still single by 32....lol. Though try to respond before midnight tomorrow as at that time I will be enjoying the midnight showing of the hobbit
 

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
16,432
5,378
113
#25
Pfft, you're still young Arwen!
Well the way I figure, is I have to meet a guy, if we both decide that we love each other and take it to the next level, we get married, then have a child/children. I'm 29, without a boyfriend and no prospects. The chances of all this happening by 35 is slim. The older a woman gets, the higher the chance of miscarriage or the child having birth defects. So it gets me feeling panicky. I've just made myself depressed lol.
Hellooo, I can totally respect your opinion but Arwen, I completely relate to what you're saying.

I understand "being young" but that does not mean the person will "stay young." People told me all the time at 25 how young I was--well, now I'm 38, and that's a lot of years gone by.

I'm in the same boat as you, Arwen, and I can't see meeting someone, marrying, having a few years to ourselves... and then starting a family at say, 44. OF COURSE it's possible. Likely? Not really, seeing as all these years have gone by already. And as I've said in other threads, being adopted with no background info, I will never have a biological relative without having biological children. Sometimes all we can do is accept that there is a Plan B... The Unwanted But Must Be Accepted Plan.

People always look the to the rarest, most miraculous cases and tell us to have faith. But what they don't seem to realize is that there is such a thing as real life. I read about a woman who, at 66, wanted so badly to have a child (she had no significant other) that she went through all these treatments and had twin boys.

WOW!! A MIRACLE! SARAH ALL OVER AGAIN, RIGHT????

She died less than three years later, with no one to care for her sons.

I understand having faith. But the Bible also tells us to have wisdom and discernment.
 
H

Hellooo

Guest
#26
Hellooo, I can totally respect your opinion but Arwen, I completely relate to what you're saying.

I understand "being young" but that does not mean the person will "stay young." People told me all the time at 25 how young I was--well, now I'm 38, and that's a lot of years gone by.

I'm in the same boat as you, Arwen, and I can't see meeting someone, marrying, having a few years to ourselves... and then starting a family at say, 44. OF COURSE it's possible. Likely? Not really, seeing as all these years have gone by already. And as I've said in other threads, being adopted with no background info, I will never have a biological relative without having biological children. Sometimes all we can do is accept that there is a Plan B... The Unwanted But Must Be Accepted Plan.

People always look the to the rarest, most miraculous cases and tell us to have faith. But what they don't seem to realize is that there is such a thing as real life. I read about a woman who, at 66, wanted so badly to have a child (she had no significant other) that she went through all these treatments and had twin boys.

WOW!! A MIRACLE! SARAH ALL OVER AGAIN, RIGHT????

She died less than three years later, with no one to care for her sons.

I understand having faith. But the Bible also tells us to have wisdom and discernment.
Wise words!
 
C

cctmedic

Guest
#27
In all Honesty, I must admit I probably think about it at least a few times a day. not every Moment but more than every now and then.

I have a desire not for a "Gf", but for a strong relationship and the fulfillment that a strong, Christ centered, relationship brings.
 
A

arwen83

Guest
#28
Hellooo, I can totally respect your opinion but Arwen, I completely relate to what you're saying.

I understand "being young" but that does not mean the person will "stay young." People told me all the time at 25 how young I was--well, now I'm 38, and that's a lot of years gone by.

I'm in the same boat as you, Arwen, and I can't see meeting someone, marrying, having a few years to ourselves... and then starting a family at say, 44. OF COURSE it's possible. Likely? Not really, seeing as all these years have gone by already. And as I've said in other threads, being adopted with no background info, I will never have a biological relative without having biological children. Sometimes all we can do is accept that there is a Plan B... The Unwanted But Must Be Accepted Plan.

People always look the to the rarest, most miraculous cases and tell us to have faith. But what they don't seem to realize is that there is such a thing as real life. I read about a woman who, at 66, wanted so badly to have a child (she had no significant other) that she went through all these treatments and had twin boys.

WOW!! A MIRACLE! SARAH ALL OVER AGAIN, RIGHT????

She died less than three years later, with no one to care for her sons.

I understand having faith. But the Bible also tells us to have wisdom and discernment.
Yes, Plan B~ it would be ideal for me to have biological children I admit, but not always the option.
 
A

arwen83

Guest
#29
We could make a deal and say if we are both still single by 32....lol. Though try to respond before midnight tomorrow as at that time I will be enjoying the midnight showing of the hobbit
I wonder if anyone has actually gone through with one of these deals? I'll be seeing it tomorrow @ 7pm.
 
A

adekruif

Guest
#30
I voted for every once in a while, but in all honesty I think it's in between that and every waking moment, and lately ALLOT more towards the every waking moment. :D
 

hhhlga89

Senior Member
Apr 23, 2012
174
0
16
#31
My petition:

Dear God,

There are some of us here on this website, that would really like it if we had someone special in our lives. That we could meet our future husband or wife in the near future. I pray that you hear our prayers, that the desires of our hearts would be fulfilled according to Your will.

Amen
Amen, and I was thinking about making a packed with you Arwen but I know most girls don't like younger guys ( and there's no way I'm moving to Canada) :)

Please prayer for me on newyears guys/gals. That's usually the worst day for me in terms of loneliness..I spent the last two newyears driving home to an empty house. There were church parties I could have gone to but I even feel alone in a crowd...

Like this if Christian Chat does alot to help with your loneliness, it does for me. (I'm not saying you all are lonely) .
 

AsifinPassing

Senior Member
Jul 13, 2010
3,608
40
48
#32
>.> Wow...already some 'hecka' good posters in here. You attract neat people, hhhlga89!

For me, being a 23 year old single male as well, I can feel ya, and relate to an extent. It's not every waking moment for me, but there was a time when it was intensely more potent than now.

Thing is, that...let's just say...wavering obsession...of mine, lead me into several relationships. To be honest, between my middle school to present days...I've had a dozen+ girlfriends, and that means that while I've learned a lot and had some great times....I've also had 12+ heart-breaks, people I've shared firsts with, and things which in some ways might strengthen future relationships...but in many other ways hurts them.

I finally got to a place where, while this still is a deep desire in me which can get the better of me at times, I've sort of half-given up. You see, about year ago...after going through more of this tricky dating stuff...I prayed to God and was like...'You can have this, Father. I'm not saying I won't put myself out there, because I will...but help me, because I'm tired of all the mess I make on my own." (not exactly, but something like this...)

About 4 years ago, I cried out to The LORD to take my loneliness from me, because I couldn't handle it anymore. On another night of crying myself to sleep as what seemed like 'the nothing' from Everlasting Story was destroying my insides....I cried out, "God, please take this from me, because I'm going to die if I have to keep living this way..." (Long story short...I had gotten to the place of never feeling anything other than desperately alone/depressed...)

Next morning, I woke up, and I didn't feel alone!!! Seriously!! God had replaced my 'lonely nothingness' overnight with HIMSELF!! XD So now, to varying degrees, I feel His presence with me...instead of isolation...even when alone!!

So...between those two things...I'm waiting. I no longer have loneliness crushing me (which in retrospect, no person probably could have changed anyway), and I've had enough complicated-heart-ache related stuff to not be a ravenous dog looking for scraps when it comes to having a relationship.

I'm sure where you are, or what's gone on with you, but trust me, dude, cry out to God. He's got you! Seriously. I'm not saying you have 'half-give up' like me, but maybe there's some sort of happy medium, where God can break through a lot more than it seems like now, and you can break through to Him. It is hard, and seems long...(whether that's 3 years or 30 depending on who you are...), but when is being with God ever not worth it?? =3
 
Last edited:
Jan 22, 2011
56
0
0
#33
I Some how enjoy being single. Happiness is why we want to have a partner right, but what if you're already happy without a partner. Why even bother about getting one. HEHEHEHE. That just me people.
 
L

LilyLight77

Guest
#34
Sometimes the thought of my singleness makes me pine for that one God has for me. But lately I've been learning how to just rest in my Abba. He has been helping me to just make him my first love over everything else. The more time I spend with him, and the more stuff I give up to him. The more at peace I am with not just my singleness, but other aspects of my life as well. Being single isn’t a curse, I’ve come to learn, it’s a time for me to get closer to Abba. Ever sense I’ve put this mind set on, I’ve really been at peace with my singleness for the most part. :3
 

Nautilus

Senior Member
Jun 29, 2012
6,488
53
48
#35
I wonder if anyone has actually gone through with one of these deals? I'll be seeing it tomorrow @ 7pm.
It was AMAZING....i hate having to wait a year for more
 
Jul 25, 2012
1,904
24
0
#36
Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.
I have been struggling alot with desiring God first and foremost and being content with Him. I want to know if there is anyone out there (or how much there are) who feel the same way I do. I just turned 23 and the only thing I'm able to think about is my single life and how much I want a gf. I actually know I'm not alone, but does anyone else struggle with desiring God more?
Desiring God is an everyday struggle for me. As to the relationship and girlfriend thing, I just don't worry about it. The thought may occur, but when I think about it, I'm in no position to be in a relationship at the time being. If I'm spending my time looking for a girl as if she were everything to me, where would that place God in my life?
 
A

arwen83

Guest
#37
I know some women refuse to date guys younger than them. I don't think age, in terms of guys younger than me, is a major factor for me. But it all depends, I had two fellas I was kinda seeing (not at the same time :p) that were 22 and 21, but I think around that age guys don't really know what they want. They start to experience feelings, get scared and run in the other direction. At least thats been my experience. Maturity and life experience is important as well.
 
S

See_KING_Truth

Guest
#38
I always desire it, I just don't always think about it.
 

hhhlga89

Senior Member
Apr 23, 2012
174
0
16
#39
Yeah for me I'm just now learning to not think about it. To just kill the thoughts when they arise. Its seems like with alot of people that god will only give it to us (maybe) when we finally surrender and say I'm going to stop obsessing about finding the one and seek your love.
 
P

penguingal

Guest
#40
I just turned 35 and kinda fed up with the search. Might as well settled as single, life is much more uncomplicated that way and I have more time for God. Anyone with me?