God Wants Us to Look at The Heart. So Why Is It that None of Us Can Get Past Looks?

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How Have Looks Affected Your Social Life?

  • I have tried to date someone just because of their looks--even though I knew they were wrong for me.

    Votes: 3 30.0%

  • I have been attracted to someone's personality but not their looks--and dated them anyway.

    Votes: 7 70.0%

  • I have to like someone's looks AND personality to be interested in them.

    Votes: 5 50.0%

  • I can't be interested in someone if I don't like the way they look.

    Votes: 1 10.0%

  • Looks are the first thing I consider when choosing a date.

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • Personality is the first thing I consider when choosing a date.

    Votes: 7 70.0%

  • It's very important that my spouse is good-looking.

    Votes: 1 10.0%

  • I don't care what the person looks like--the heart is what matters.

    Votes: 3 30.0%

  • People have rejected me because of the way I look.

    Votes: 6 60.0%

  • I think I'd find the right person if only I were better-looking.

    Votes: 3 30.0%

  • If my spouse lost their looks, I wouldn't be attracted to them anymore.

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • I think I'm good-looking and deserve a good-looking spouse as well.

    Votes: 1 10.0%

  • I don't think I'm good-looking and will take whomever would accept me.

    Votes: 1 10.0%

  • I have faith that someone can love me for both who I am and the way I look.

    Votes: 7 70.0%

  • Who a person is makes them beautiful to me, including what they look like.

    Votes: 9 90.0%

  • Other--I will explain in my post.

    Votes: 2 20.0%
  • Total voters
    10
zeroturbulence

zeroturbulence

Senior Member
#21
Aug 2, 2009
24,653
4,316
113
#21
Jullianna said:
That is soooooooooo true. One guy in particular was movie star handsome (and was actually in the two Fugitive movies), smart, funny, heroic.... But in the few hours I was around him, he rudely offended three different people for no reason whatsoever. I couldn't wait to get away. It was awful...between some folks and their egos, there's no room for a relationship. :)
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Exactly! I once dated this girl who was very attractive and I couldn't believe I was actually going on a date with her but knew something was not right when she came dressed as Daisy Duke, no lie! Cutoff short short jeans and a tied half-top! She was built for it but who in the world dresses like that for a date? That was embarassing enough but then she had this strange habit of just talking to complete strangers who were just walking by. When I asked her about that she said that I should try it lol. That was my first and last date with her. That was also long before I became a christian.
 
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zeroturbulence

zeroturbulence

Senior Member
#22
Aug 2, 2009
24,653
4,316
113
#22
Rissa77 said:
My mind works about the same every time... I may find them physically attractive at first, but their ugly character will make them ugly. I may find them physically unattractive at first, but their beautiful character will make them beautiful. My first, initial reaction is fleshy. Over time, the true beauty or lack of beauty reveals itself. I can think back to all the guys I thought were cute at first in high school, and after getting to know them, they all became ugly to me. The unattractive people with the quirks they think aren't cute will become cute to me.

I'm finding myself attracted to someone right now who was attractive at first, but then his behavior made him unattractive. Over time, the behavior changed. Now as I'm getting to know him more, he's growing on me, and the little quirks he thinks are unattractive are cute to me. He has a good heart, and it makes him beautiful - much more than my first impression.
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I am the same way in that I can become attracted to someone I didn't find attractive at first, after getting to know them.

It sounds like you may have found a sheep in wolf's clothing. :)
 
M

Miguel7

Guest
#23
#23
SoulSearch, HONK! We do have the mind and heart of Christ, but we still live in a body (flesh) that has carnal desires. Our carnal desire is for someone more visually attractive. Some people deal better with it than others.

It is possible that we can walk so strong in the Holy Spirit, that the physical appearance is of less concern. Sort of like dying to our flesh. But, I think we need to be honest with ourself. Don't expect too much, but don't settle for just anyone unrealistically. I would rather see a person be attracted to the person they marry for the sake of the strength of the relationship.
 
N

NodMyHeadLikeYeah

Guest
#24
#24
because no one wants to date someone that makes us wanna puke to look at.....
 
D

diyahna2011

Guest
#25
#25
way to go Melody! ahahah
 
B

beckyz

Guest
#26
#26
I'm the worse person to comment on this subject since God has really been dealing with me and the relationships I get into. I think there has to be a physical attraction to the other person. On the other hand, I tend to jump right into romance, the kind you find in the movies, which is totally looks based. Real love is built on friendship first. I imagine if you are friends with someone they will become better and better looking to you the more you know them. I wouldn't know this since I have never in my life dated anyone who was a friend first and sadly it has caused me great pain and suffering.
 
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