Hello, I'm new here. My name is Laura. I just turned thirty.
I'm having an extremely hard time with being single. I have never been on a date. I used to think it was because of my weight, but I see much bigger women with people all the time. I've watched my best friends date, get engaged, marry, have a baby, have another, and so on. And I used to think that I would be blessed with that, too. But here I am.
I've had some close friends tell me I need to focus on God only. I understand that. But I'm human. I struggle with the fact that marriage is an idol for me. I have surrendered it in prayer over and over again. I've prayed for God to take away the desire for marriage if it's not in His will for me. And nothing.
And lately, I have been turning my back on God. I feel like He won't answer my prayers at all. I'm just... at the end of my rope.