How Do You Determine If Someone Is "Christian Enough" For You?

[Lenardzw]

Going through this poll really made me re-think my ideas on what constitutes an acceptably "Christian enough" person to date (between the stops for rest and the many sips of water). It also made me reflect on whether or not I am the right kind of Christian for the person who may consider me as a prospective date/ spouse. For me, this second consideration is far more important.

Still she must check a few of those items on that list in the poll. I know a lady who has been calling & texting me a lot. Claims to be a Christian but it appears that she has no idea of the meaning of restraint (Like a Boeing 747 with the brakes of a bicycle). She is always criticizing my local church without setting foot in it, seems to clash with almost everyone, has this fiery temper but is always inviting me to go places with her. "No," is my usual response, but you know I'm a reasonably open minded guy so at other times I say, "I've got other plans."

I'm just not seeing any love for God or anyone. How she treats people in her life - like her family, colleagues, the vegetable vendor down her street is an important indicator to me. I've come to the conclusion that she was not for me. She still calls me at times,in a Stephen King kinda way.

 

[Tinkerbell725]

Someone who loves the Lord, lives a life of obedience, Jesus shines upon their face, and treat others with respect.

 

[laura_charlotte]

I don't sit in judgement and make an appraisal on people who I encounter on my walk from that approach to decide who gains a place and who doesn't in my life. "How obedient are you?" and then have some kind of spectrum for assessment. I come at it in prayer with God "is this person supposed to be part of my life" "what is my role in all of this" "what lessons should I be taking away from this". In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your path.

God is faithful and He will let you know whether a person is supposed to be walking life's path with you. There are so many inspiring people out there who have met and just knowing the person has turned an unbeliever who lived their life for the enemy, totally inspired to make a turn around and dedicate themselves to Jesus upon meeting the person God had intended for them. That's not to say that's in every case, but God has an individualized perfect plan for all of us and it might not be what we expect. Going by proverbs 3:6 has led me to have happy experiences with no regrets looking back, so I'd recommend it to be a great place to start.

 

[missy2014]

i dont like this statement at all we have to love people anyway accept them regardless i just hope they show it to me, the greatest thing i can do for them is evangelise and help them draw close to God so that i helped so they could endure and have te reward that when i see them in heaven i helped them alot but ultimately we do Nothing its God

i find this question misguided and hurtful but that ok no bigie i hope you think more clearly about your life introspectively and your questions. i ask you reflect on the good samaritan story and the tax collector and sinner it wasnt the priest that helped.

 

[missy2014]

* statement not question

 

[missy2014]

i dont like this statement at all we have to love people anyway accept them regardless i just hope they show it to me, the greatest thing i can do for them is evangelise and help them draw close to God so that i helped so they could endure and have te reward that when i see them in heaven i helped them alot but ultimately we do Nothing its God

i find this question misguided and hurtful but that ok no bigie i hope you think more clearly about your life introspectively and your questions. i ask you reflect on the good samaritan story and the tax collector and sinner it wasnt the priest that helped.

actually sorry tink and other i got confused this question/ thing is about marriage which makes perfect sense yeh i know i made a mistake just disregard my post folks thanks lol
wheres the delete button?

 

[AsifinPassing]

 

[Lynx]

Kudos for seoulsearch. A poll more than six months old and still getting votes.

More kudos for Kim. Or maybe sympathy for her.

Perhaps I should preach a sermon with a passage from Song of Solomon as the text. That would scare everybody away real quick.

 

[seoulsearch]

Going through this poll really made me re-think my ideas on what constitutes an acceptably "Christian enough" person to date (between the stops for rest and the many sips of water).

I'll have to include these steps the next time I write a poll... It'll probably look something like this:

Option 1...
Option 12.
Go Get Coffee.
Option 13...
Option 27.
Take a Nap.
Option 28...
Option 57 1/2.
Wow, You're Still Here? You Deserve a Certificate of Achievement.

In all seriousness...

I know this thread is older than dirt (and even some of our members, including me ) and that it can be confusing because many of the members who originally posted aren't here anymore...

But the topic and answers are just as relevant today as they were 2 years ago, which is why I don't put ending dates on my polls.

That... and I'm too busy (or was that lazy) to rewrite the entire thing.

 

[violakat]

None of the above to me makes one a Christian. For me, it's one who accepted Christ as Savior and is seeking to follow God.

Editted:
Just now realized it was a Zombie thread. But my answer remains the same.

 

[pete13]

there are basic criteria and advanced criteria, your list appears to be full of what i call basic criteria i.e criteria like: does he/she go to church, does he/she pray, does he/she go on missions etc. there is a higher criteria which is advanced and this can include criteria like: is he/she a seed of God? or did he/she come to the earth from God? those are the type of questions you should be asking. i am sure the devil can pass all of those questions in your poll. so congrats, you have just passed the devil to marry you. don't you know that the devil can pretend to have those qualities you have in your poll just to marry you? the devil can go mission trips with you, pray with you and go to church with you. if it was that easy to find a true christian wife i would have been married with 10 kids already. here is the truth, anyone can pretend to be anyone, therefore none of the criteria in your poll guarantees that the person is a strong christian. and none of the criteria in your poll guarantees that the person is not a devil.

 

[zeroturbulence]

I never gave a serious answer, so..

If a woman believes in Jesus and tries to treat people fairly that's Christian enough for me. It doesn't matter to me how often she goes or doesn't go to church because I know many church going people and self-professed christians treat others harshly using their beliefs as a measuring stick to judge others. No thank you. I just want someone who believes that Jesus saves and tries to be fair and understanding of others.

 

[Descyple]

I know a woman is Christian enough for me when.....................

1. She gets my name engraved on her own Bible, because she believes everything she has is "ours" (wait, does that sound romantic, or a little creepy?)

2. When the pastor says "We will now send the children off to Sunday school for the remainder of the service" and my girlfriend takes me by the hand and leads me off to the Sunday school room, because she acknowledges and is not ashamed of my numerous bouts of immaturity! (Note: I personally prefer the term "child-likeness" rather than immaturity to describe myself - it's more biblical).

3. When we visit the local Christian Amish community here in Ontario, she turns to me and says "Descyple, I would give up all my technology to be with you!" So I grab her cell phone and throw it in a nearby river, and she responds by immediately clawing me to pieces in a blind rage, and then afterwards she says to me "Sorry dear, I'd call an ambulance for you, but my phone is in the river". I appreciate a woman that has an ironic sense of humor!

 

[Fenner]

I know a woman is Christian enough for me when.....................

1. She gets my name engraved on her own Bible, because she believes everything she has is "ours" (wait, does that sound romantic, or a little creepy?)

2. When the pastor says "We will now send the children off to Sunday school for the remainder of the service" and my girlfriend takes me by the hand and leads me off to the Sunday school room, because she acknowledges and is not ashamed of my numerous bouts of immaturity! (Note: I personally prefer the term "child-likeness" rather than immaturity to describe myself - it's more biblical).

3. When we visit the local Christian Amish community here in Ontario, she turns to me and says "Descyple, I would give up all my technology to be with you!" So I grab her cell phone and throw it in a nearby river, and she responds by immediately clawing me to pieces in a blind rage, and then afterwards she says to me "Sorry dear, I'd call an ambulance for you, but my phone is in the river". I appreciate a woman that has an ironic sense of humor!

I can't believe that you're not married.

 

[AsifinPassing]

Well, this is obviously a pertinent topic...hence it's long life...or resurrection...however you want to think about that...

*coughs*

Anyway, I suppose I should legitimately answer...now that I not only have thought about it more, but find the timing and content pertinent:

I think a lot of us are not really Christian. We use the name, but then our actions, words, choices...etc...don't seem to align with scripture.

You know the old adage, "If it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck and looks like a duck...than it's a duck." or "Talk is cheap. Money buys the whiskey." or "The proof is in the pudding." or "A flower by any other name" (which is from Shakespeare's Romeo & Juliet)...? I could keep going, but I think you get the idea...

Well, why is it that so many of us aren't like Jesus? He said we have to be. He said He'd help us be. He said many things, but of the things He said...how many do we know? Of the ones we know...how many do we practice?

Don't get me wrong, this isn't meant to be a guilt trip or shame type of post...(just like when I give sermons...that's not the intent), but if we feel convicted...then I hope we wouldn't pass that up. We are SUPPOSED to feel convicted when walking out of step with God. The Holy Spirit does that, and that conviction is meant to lead to repentance which restores us (if we so choose) to walking upright.

The thing is... there are so many of us who are fans of Jesus, but when it comes to following Him...sacrificing ourselves and the things of this life...growing into His image, likeness, and Lordship... We're distracted or uninterested or whatever the reason is. I haven't met too many of those people. I HAVE met some, but the number of full-time, fully committed Christians vs those who admire Jesus and do a little here and there are so starkly contrasted...

A couple thoughts/questions in this aspect:

How much time today did you spend working, doing chores, watching TV or Movies, or plugging other everyday Human things into your thoughts, feelings, words, actions, etc?

Now, comparatively, how much time did you spend reading scripture, praying (both talking & listening), worshiping, serving others, talking with others about who God is and what He has done (both in general and to you specifically), & things which the Bible teaches us feeds our spirit and strengthens both our relationship with Christ and His presence and work in us?

___________________________________________________

That's the difference of 'Christian-Enough'. Is it the real deal...all-in...or just a weekend-warrior, part-time thing among many others...

I really need someone who is willing to become, help me in becoming, and accept my help in becoming that fully devoted disciple of Jesus Christ vs just being another fan.

 

[Descyple]

I know a woman is Christian enough for me when....

1. She says I sing like Chris Tomlin (if he had a severe cold and there was feedback in his microphone!)

2. She says I still look young enough to join the church's youth group (I don't mind a woman who has cataracts in her eyes).

3. At the church picnic she tells everyone the food is contaminated with the salmonella virus, so I get to eat everything (a little widespread panic is always fun on church outings!).

4. She laughs at any of my jokes above!

 

[PinkDiamond]

there are basic criteria and advanced criteria, your list appears to be full of what i call basic criteria i.e criteria like: does he/she go to church, does he/she pray, does he/she go on missions etc. there is a higher criteria which is advanced and this can include criteria like: is he/she a seed of God? or did he/she come to the earth from God? those are the type of questions you should be asking. i am sure the devil can pass all of those questions in your poll. so congrats, you have just passed the devil to marry you. don't you know that the devil can pretend to have those qualities you have in your poll just to marry you? the devil can go mission trips with you, pray with you and go to church with you. if it was that easy to find a true christian wife i would have been married with 10 kids already. here is the truth, anyone can pretend to be anyone, therefore none of the criteria in your poll guarantees that the person is a strong christian. and none of the criteria in your poll guarantees that the person is not a devil.

Lol. Technically, anyone who is alive came to earth from God since he created the natural process of conception and reproduction.

 

[AbigailZeke]

Very interesting thread! I'm only 2 years late.

Though I agree that being a true believer is not measured by his/her activities/in-activities, I'm convinced that a true believer can't help but overflow in his/her Jesus-ness. So, my choices are below:

Goes to church once a week.
Goes to church 2 or more times a week
-bottomline is, goes to church.
Reads their Bible daily.
Regularly takes Bible classes or classes at their church.
-no true Christian can truly be happy without feeding his spirit
Has a support network of spiritual mentors and counselors.
-YES
Is part of a church ministry.
Participates in both ministries and charities outside the church.
-this is a personal preference, I can't imagine myself attending a church without being part of a ministry, so a guy who feels the same would really be great
Prays daily.
-YES
Has both Chrisitian and secular friends.
-YES
Comes from a Christian background.
-I don't like clashes with non-Christian families.
Does not go on missions trips.
-another personal preference, I hate travelling.
Has no specific denomination (or attends a non-denominational church.)
-Yup

 

[wwjd_kilden]

Eeek, too many options!

- The main thing is that he believes (not just in some god, but in our God, Jesus Christ)
- I take it for granted that a Christian prays often (whether it is out loud or inside their head)
- I don't see "going to church regularly" as a mark of Christianity, but I do think fellowship with other Christians is important, be it in church or elsewhere.

oh, and he has to be be a bit crazy, or I'll scare him away

 

[Elenah]

When I was around 19 or 20 I remember always saying.."so & so is a good Christian,or oh man I'm such a bad Christian"...sometimes saying it flippantly or joking. Once my Pastor overheard me saying to a friend that I feel like such a bad Christian 'cause I don't pray every monring first thing...I just can't do it most days...I need to wake up first. I don't wanna talk to anyone in the morning,let alone try to form a cohesive thought to speak to God about.
He heard me say this & said,"There's no such thing as a good or bad Christian if you think about it.Yer' a child of God,now saved by the blood of Christ...you have His Spirit in you,He sees you as He ses Christ,so how can you be bad?"
He said it all with a smile..not even sounding judgmental or anything...I kinda knew what he meant by it.

I still believe that Christians can be unequally yolked. Obviously if yer' a believer you should be with another believer..but I also think you should be with the "right one". I've known & know tons of Christian women that are on fire for God...love the Lord fully..know the bible front to back & can quote you scriptures for anything imaginable that would arise in your daily life.
Women who pray daily..fast..carry themselves with dignity & humility all at once.
But...they are not meant for "me".

I don't need someone who is a spiritual dynamo. I need someone who loves God & loves me. Period.
I don't need or desire some sort of holy perfection. If she is all those thing's..then fine. Good for her.
If she is doing those thing's for God,that's awesome..but I don't ever want someone doing those thing's for me..or to impres me. Just be yourself...whatever that self is.
We all grow & change at times. With God,by God,and in and of ourselves.

I want real. No one I am with should feel they need to change to be with me. Obviously if I am with someone,I am with them because I love them completely. I am not out to change someone or conform them to my version of what a "Godly woman" should be or not be. Hopefully they realize this about me...and understand that when I tell them that I love them for who they are,I mean that with 100% of who I am. No manipulation or hidden agendas.

For me...that's real love...real commitment..real trust...real love in action,thus real Christianity!
To me,that's a "strong Christian".

You said the things right. God bless you and I hope you can find a good christian woman. Im a woman of 33 years old and I want a good christian partener too.