How far off is your mate or Hus/Wife or GF/BF from your...

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E

Enow

Banned
#21
Dec 21, 2012
2,901
39
0
#21
JosephsDreams said:
...ideal of perfection in a spouse or gf/bf that you had in mind? Or even your ex spouse or ex bf/gf if you are not married or not dating at this moment.

His he or she a 9 out of 10?
A 5 out of 10?
A 9.9 out of 10?

What was the area he or she most different then your "perfect" or idealized dream mate?

My wife was a 9.5 out of 10. I did not like her short hair and sometimes she was a little to intense.
Otherwise her personality, communication, spirituality, humor, looks, work ethic, morality, mannerisms and loyalty were about right on for what was the quintessential mate for me.
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I think if I ever had been blessed with a near perfect mate, it would have been because of Christ in her than anything else. Any good I see in her would be His goodness in her.

So the ideal perfection on my part and her part is when we are in Heaven perfected by Him because we love each other as family and not romantically.

1 Corinthians 7:[SUP]29 [/SUP]But this I say, brethren, the time is short: it remaineth, that both they that have wives be as though they had none; [SUP]30 [/SUP]And they that weep, as though they wept not; and they that rejoice, as though they rejoiced not; and they that buy, as though they possessed not; [SUP]31 [/SUP]And they that use this world, as not abusing it: for the fashion of this world passeth away. [SUP]32 [/SUP]But I would have you without carefulness. He that is unmarried careth for the things that belong to the Lord, how he may please the Lord: [SUP]33 [/SUP]But he that is married careth for the things that are of the world, how he may please his wife.

Since ...

1 Corinthians 7:1Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman. [SUP]2 [/SUP]Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband. [SUP]3 [/SUP]Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband. [SUP]4 [/SUP]The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife. [SUP]5 [/SUP]Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.

So the married people have an obligation in the romantic sense in meeting the other's needs or wants, but in Heaven when we are perfected, that obligation will not be there and neither will the need nor want.

For singles down here suffering the need or the want, that throne of grace is available where Jesus can help you to not make any provision for the flesh to fulfill the lust thereof and thus be content and be thankful.

[video=youtube;_rR_Rdb1CTE]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_rR_Rdb1CTE[/video]
 
Lighthearted

Lighthearted

Senior Member
#22
Oct 17, 2016
1,779
818
113
54
#22
He's definitely a 9ner workin' on a full 10....God's not done with either of us yet!
 
T

toinena

Guest
#23
#23
JosephsDreams said:
...ideal of perfection in a spouse or gf/bf that you had in mind? Or even your ex spouse or ex bf/gf if you are not married or not dating at this moment.

His he or she a 9 out of 10?
A 5 out of 10?
A 9.9 out of 10?

What was the area he or she most different then your "perfect" or idealized dream mate?

My wife was a 9.5 out of 10. I did not like her short hair and sometimes she was a little to intense.
Otherwise her personality, communication, spirituality, humor, looks, work ethic, morality, mannerisms and loyalty were about right on for what was the quintessential mate for me.
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My very much so ex husband would be a 3/10.
[TABLE="width: 100%"]
[TR]
[TD="width: 50%"] pros
[/TD]
[TD="width: 50%"] cons
[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD="width: 50%"] He was a man
[/TD]
[TD="width: 50%"] He didn’t take financial responsibility
[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD="width: 50%"] He liked rakfisk
[/TD]
[TD="width: 50%"] He is a drunk
[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD="width: 50%"] He hunted pheasants and rabbits
[/TD]
[TD="width: 50%"] He smoked
[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD="width: 50%"] He was quite handy when he finally did something
[/TD]
[TD="width: 50%"] He was verbally abusive
[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD="width: 50%"]

[/TD]
[TD="width: 50%"] He was violent
[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD="width: 50%"]

[/TD]
[TD="width: 50%"] He was self absorbed
[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD="width: 50%"]

[/TD]
[TD="width: 50%"] He was a detailed oriented controlfreak (for others. Not himself)
[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD="width: 50%"]

[/TD]
[TD="width: 50%"] He thought he was a better cook than me
[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD="width: 50%"]

[/TD]
[TD="width: 50%"] He played violin. (torturous in the mornings)
[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD="width: 50%"]

[/TD]
[TD="width: 50%"] He never gave me flowers
[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD="width: 50%"]

[/TD]
[TD="width: 50%"] He never remembered my birthday
[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD="width: 50%"]

[/TD]
[TD="width: 50%"] He always procastinated everything
[/TD]
[/TR]
[/TABLE]
 
J

joefizz

Guest
#25
#25
WineRose said:
I was actually talking about air/empty space. Cuz I don't have a boyfriend. :/
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oh...I had been wondering about if you did or not,because though I know we are 10 years apart,if you were 18 already I would want to date you,though I know that's unlikely to have a date because I understand the age gap is worrisome to parents even if you were at a technical adult age,to me it's not crazy because my parents met with an age gap of 11 years,she was 19 he was 30,so to me crazy would be an age gap of 15 or 20,I suppose it is rather farfetched still but at least know that you are loved by someone other than God and family,It doesn't matter if I never see your face, your humor and wittiness are what I like most about you,never thought there was a girl out there that's as silly and wacky yet blunt as me,glad to have met you at least virtually.
 
M

MollyConnor

Guest
#27
#27
I once heard a guy say to his buddies, that he knew his wife wasn't the most beautiful girl in the world. He felt he had settled and was having problems now because he wasn't attracted to her.

This made me feel really bad for her. I hope that one day I meet a guy who thinks I am the most beautiful girl to him. My Pastor is always saying his wife is the most beautiful woman. I love that.

I'm sorry for your loss, JosephsDreams.
 
Dino246

Dino246

Senior Member
#28
Jun 30, 2015
25,414
13,761
113
#28
Lighthearted said:
Lol...I don't think so but I could be wrong.
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"We're two of a kind, and workin' on a full house"

It seemed familiar. Maybe you just sound lyrical when you speak. ;)
 
Lighthearted

Lighthearted

Senior Member
#29
Oct 17, 2016
1,779
818
113
54
#29
Dino246 said:
"We're two of a kind, and workin' on a full house"

It seemed familiar. Maybe you just sound lyrical when you speak. ;)
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Yep...guess in kinda does sound like that! ;)
 
zeroturbulence

zeroturbulence

Senior Member
#30
Aug 2, 2009
24,644
4,305
113
#30
My mate is so far off, I've never even seen nor heard of her... :confused:

 
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W

Wild

Guest
#31
#31
As far as the east is from the west.
 
J

joefizz

Guest
#32
#32
joefizz said:
oh...I had been wondering about if you did or not,because though I know we are 10 years apart,if you were 18 already I would want to date you,though I know that's unlikely to have a date because I understand the age gap is worrisome to parents even if you were at a technical adult age,to me it's not crazy because my parents met with an age gap of 11 years,she was 19 he was 30,so to me crazy would be an age gap of 15 or 20,I suppose it is rather farfetched still but at least know that you are loved by someone other than God and family,It doesn't matter if I never see your face, your humor and wittiness are what I like most about you,never thought there was a girl out there that's as silly and wacky yet blunt as me,glad to have met you at least virtually.
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Also your country being about 17 hours away by plane from the state I'm in also makes the possibility of meeting each other in person even less likely(looked it up)but at least there's still Christian chat it would have to be years later anyways I reckon.
 
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J

joefizz

Guest
#33
#33
joefizz said:
oh...I had been wondering about if you did or not,because though I know we are 10 years apart,if you were 18 already I would want to date you,though I know that's unlikely to have a date because I understand the age gap is worrisome to parents even if you were at a technical adult age,to me it's not crazy because my parents met with an age gap of 11 years,she was 19 he was 30,so to me crazy would be an age gap of 15 or 20,I suppose it is rather farfetched still but at least know that you are loved by someone other than God and family,It doesn't matter if I never see your face, your humor and wittiness are what I like most about you,never thought there was a girl out there that's as silly and wacky yet blunt as me,glad to have met you at least virtually.
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joefizz said:
Also your country being about 17 hours away by plane from the state I'm in also makes the possibility of meeting each other in person even less likely(looked it up)but at least there's still Christian chat it would have to be years later anyways I reckon.
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ahh who knows what the future holds....
 
T

toinena

Guest
#34
#34
joefizz said:
ahh who knows what the future holds....
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Seriously! Are you still hinting? Didn't the person in question have a tendency to time jump? At least you have to start applying for a.visa.
 
J

joefizz

Guest
#35
#35
toinena said:
Seriously! Are you still hinting? Didn't the person in question have a tendency to time jump? At least you have to start applying for a.visa.
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I know which is what I meant also by years,I don't have the money or resources,for anything like that,I'm still stuck living with relatives and can't save up really any money from my job for anything that expensive,I'm only part time too,I would switch to full time but I haven't even saved enough to move out to a place for myself yet,so I can organize a decent schedule,it drives me bonkers thinking on that I still haven't been able to even move out on my own.
 
T

toinena

Guest
#36
#36
joefizz said:
I know which is what I meant also by years,I don't have the money or resources,for anything like that,I'm still stuck living with relatives and can't save up really any money from my job for anything that expensive,I'm only part time too,I would switch to full time but I haven't even saved enough to move out to a place for myself yet,so I can organize a decent schedule,it drives me bonkers thinking on that I still haven't been able to even move out on my own.
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Now you have a plan and a goal. You are not ready for getting married as long as you can't provide for yourself. So start saving and look for a fulltime job sounds like a good plan. (I wish I could give you one of mine.... do you teach Norwegian by any chance? )
 
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