In the Battle for Love, How do you Respond?

[Tintin]

I don't know that I've ever liked the same girl as a friend. But then again, when it comes to observing these things, I haven't always been the sharpest knife in the drawer. There have been many cases where I've liked a girl (in primary school, high school and definitely university) and she hasn't liked me. Most of the time I've laid it out in the open. Cue the awkwardness. I believe it's important to be open and honest, no-matter how uncomfortable/awkward that may make me or the situation. It's important not to dwell on the awkwardness though. Otherwise you don't get anywhere.

 

[Roh_Chris]

This is an interesting question because the right answer will depend on the particular individual's role in the relationship. What I mean is that, for a woman it would be ideal to walk away and let the guy come after her if he was genuinely interested in her. But would the same response be acceptable for a guy? Or, would the guy be expected to pursue harder (more than the other suitors who pursued her) to win the lady's heart?

Personally, I would take it as a challenge if there are other guys interested in the girl I like. I take it as she is worth their interest. However, if she seems to enjoy the "attention", then I would back off because I would interpret it as she being indecisiveness.

 

[melita916]

only one story comes to mind that's kinda similar. some time ago, i was sorta kinda maybe interested in a friend. he and i got along very well. but i noticed he paid a lot of attention to this other girl, so i was confused for a bit, wondering if he liked me or just saw me as a good friend.

one morning, he asked if i could meet him for coffee because he was dealing with something, and because i'm a great friend (lol), i met up with him. turned out he and the girl were trying to make a relationship happen but there was a lot of drama attached due to the girl making some bad choices in the past. and i was like ohhhhhhh i have my answer. it wasn't the answer i wanted, but at least i knew what to do. so i buried my feelings and realized i needed to be "the friend." lol

 

[skylove7]

Honestly billions of people on the planet...
Why fight over one...that is not interested or not in love with you, but someone else.

The result brings out the worst side of people...
Lol..like black friday at walmart.

I just love peace in my life...I dunno call me crazy lol

Drama makes my tummy hurt...

Lol...I just never cared for fighting....unless I could whoop the devil...
Jesus has that taken care of...I am not needed in that department

But anyone reading this who may want to fight over someone not in love with you
Remember it is not worth it...
Just move on because you ARE deserving and worthy for love....

From someone who WILL return the feelings, faithfully to you.

God bless you singles in your search

 

[seoulsearch]

My only comment at the moment is, before walking away, do you even show or tell the guy that you
like him? It makes no sense for a guy to chase someone for no reason. I know 'the thirst' that makes a guy choose and chase after a girl, but things are different now.

If I'm interested, I'll let her know, and if she is, I hope she'd let me know. I really don't find the whole 'hard to get' 'unintersted' or 'cat and mouse' attractive at all. If anything, it's painful, confusing, and just not very realistic.

Thank you for pointing this out, Reece. It doesn't seem fair to the poor guy if you like him and walk away without him even knowing you had an interest. This is a great point I hadn't even thought of, though to be honest, I'm not sure how I'd let the person know. I used to be all about telling someone how I feel but after reading so many threads here in which guys said they're turned off by a woman who kind of ruins their chance to pursue... Now I'm not even sure how I'd let a guy know I liked him.

I'm guessing... The Sky Writer (a plane writing, "I REALLY REALLY REALLY LIKE YOU!!" in the clouds) is out.

Maybe I'll just revert back to 4th grade and punch him in the arm. After all, guys only seem to understand playground violence as a means of communication, right?

 

[Siberian_Khatru]

I have never been the person on the outside competing for someone's love on an exclusive level. I have sort of been the meat in a love triangle sandwich working through the emotions with the people on the outside. It's a little awkward, a little stressful, and a lot of honing one's ability to exercise tact and discretion.

But mostly it's just a hassle and has always ended in someone feeling burnt. Either that has been my failure or theirs, and it stinks either way.

 

[melita916]

I'm guessing... The Sky Writer (a plane writing, "I REALLY REALLY REALLY LIKE YOU!!" in the clouds) is out.

ah. this is where i went wrong.

sigh. *writes in notes... bad idea.*

 

[seoulsearch]

ah. this is where i went wrong.

sigh. *writes in notes... bad idea.*

That, and the fact that when I saw that note in the sky... I assume Melita was talking to ME...

Oh snap... you mean that was actually for some guy...?

 

[skylove7]

Aww..dont give up Melita...child remember...we exist in a world...deemed more than cookies..treadmills ...and diets..ugh.Jesus! ..sighs... life is love..oh I wish I could find love

 

[skylove7]

I stopped looking Melita...when I hit forty...lol I had waited twenty years since my divorce...I wait or be thankful I breathe...all I do lol at 42 in my life all I do...lol may a man agree or not oh well lol

 

[melita916]

Aww..dont give up Melita...child remember...we exist in a world...deemed more than cookies..treadmills ...and diets..ugh.Jesus! ..sighs... life is love..oh I wish I could find love

diets? what is that lol

ok back to the subject of the OP...

 

[egeiro]

diets? what is that lol

ok back to the subject of the OP...

Hey, I derail everyone else's threads. I would be honoured if someone derailed mine. It's kind of like we're this cheeky family, where we show our affection by being subtly annoying in a cute way.