Is It True That Singles Have More Money?

[ntw1103]

* When were you in the best place financially? When you were married, in a relationship, or single?

I have never been in a relationship, so single.

* How did changing from one state to another (single to taken or taken to single) impact your finances?

N/A

* Has your marital (or non-marital) status influenced the way you handle money? (For instance, does a single without a family feel less pressure to take on a high-stress promotion?)

I believe as Christians we are supposed to be good stewards of money, whether single or married. Someday, Lord willing, I hope to get married and raise a family. Knowing the costs associated with this, I have the mindset of trying to get ahead. I do all my word heartily as unto the Lord, and push for promotions, new jobs, and raises. I also regularly set aside money into savings. One of my goals, is to never have to take out a loan, and to be able to pay for anything with cash. (so far so good.)

* If you are single, how does the hope for marriage and a family impact your financial planning? (Do you save for a future ring, wedding, or family?)

See previous answer. I don't specifically save for a ring, or wedding, but do realize there are costs involved, and factor that into the overall saving.
I also expect that if/when I meet a girl, she is probably going to have debt of some type, it is rare to find someone who doesn't... so I've also factored in the possibility of quashing said debt.

* Should a man expect when he goes from being single to being married that he will pay for most everything?

Yes, he should expect to pay for *absolutely* everything. (not to say that always needs to be the case, but that should be the expectation. To the men that don't agree with this: stop being wimps.)

* Should a woman be expected to cover at least 50% of the bills?

No, but again, I don't see anything wrong if this is the case.

* Does a "traditional" marriage mean the man works and the wife stays at home?

I think that definition fits.
I don't think there is anything wrong with a wife wanting to work, or holding a job. I don't think it should be an expectation. I do think it is extremely important for parents to be involved in the raising of their kids. One of the parents should be a full-time parent. "traditionally" the man is the bread winner, but depending on circumstances things can be switched around. That being said, sometimes, there are a reason for traditions outside of just being a tradition.

 

[Roh_Chris]

So many questions, Kim... tut tut.

* When were you in the best place financially? When you were married, in a relationship, or single?

Financially, I was in the best place whenever I was single.

* How did changing from one state to another (single to taken or taken to single) impact your finances?

Statistically -
I could save about 20% - 30% of my income whenever I was single. This dropped to about 10% - 15% whenever I was in a relationship.
I was able to take "time outs" to pamper myself whenever I was single. When in a relationship, I did not have the "financial cushion" to make that happen.

* If you are single, how does the hope for marriage and a family impact your financial planning? (Do you save for a future ring, wedding, or family?)

Nah, I wouldn't do that. I take it for granted that expenses are bound to go 3x when you are in a relationship that is heading towards marriage. Then, it would go up by 5x when you are planning to have children. I think these expenses have to be met as and when they occur, and one must not fret about them.

* Should a man expect when he goes from being single to being married that he will pay for most everything?

No. I believe that the lowest income must be allocated for ALL expenses (mortgage, expenses, groceries, etc.) while the highest income must be saved in whole. If the wife earns more than the husband, then it is the husband's income which must be spent (read, treated as disposable income), or vice-versa, if the husband is earning more.

* Should a woman be expected to cover at least 50% of the bills?

While the above holds true post-marriage, during the dating or courtship phase, I would expect the woman to cover at least 30%-40% of the bills once the relationship is official. I would be willing to lower this expectation, if she has some other financial obligations to be met (dependent parents, mortgage, student loans, etc.)

* Does a "traditional" marriage mean the man works and the wife stays at home?

This holds true only for a limited period beginning from the pregnancy and until the child/children complete(s) schooling. In the meantime, should we require an extra pair of earning hands, she can look at some "work at home" options.

 

[seoulsearch]

Really? Really, Kim, you're going to throw these out there, knowing EXACTLY what's going to happen if someone takes the bait?

That's it. I'm calling you out. You're a provoker. Yup. You pot-stirrer, you! I know exactly what's going down, all the way to Chinatown, dude.

You troublemaker.

* Now, now, Shour, I'm not stirring any pots. I may, however, be overturning a few rice cookers. And I like it like that.

* The questions I'm asking are perfectly valid, most especially in THIS forum!!!

* Perhaps you would prefer that I start another porn thread. That can be arranged, you know. Not because it's a a personal issue, but because you already know I can find a way to ask questions about anything. Including other questions.

* I'm actually not trying to start anything because as I said, I think these are perfectly good questions. I'm very pleased that what we have going here is a very calm, rational, and interesting conversation... and hopefully it will stay that way. I'm even more pleased that we have a number of new faces posting here (who are new or usually don't post)--as always, the CC crowd changes, and I enjoy the chance to learn what works for a wide variety of people.

* "You provoker... pot-stirrer... troublemaker!" By the way... thanks for the compliments! This is a hundred times better than being called things such as, "boring", "just one of the crowd", and, worst of all, "passive". *shudder*

 

[seoulsearch]

P.S. All joking aside, many of these questions are things I've tried to ask in other threads. Since the other threads had their own directions, I never received any direct answers.

If a question in important to me, I often try asking again--whether in a different context, environment, or timing... after everything else has calmed down a bit--because my purpose and interest is always a good discussion.

Thanks to everyone who has been doing that here, and I hope it will continue!

 

[Lynx]

On a side note - which is much different from going off-topic I'll have you know! - I have noticed when I was broke I ate much healthier. Back in my teens when I had very little money I would mostly live on cans of veggies. Calcium chloride aside, I think I was gustatorially a lot better off then than I am now.

 

[jsr1221]

Hey everyone,

A post in another thread made me want to ask this question. I'd like to start off by saying that OF COURSE I know each situation is different and in some cases, a single might have more disposable income, and in other cases, someone else may not. It's highly individual.

But here are the questions I found myself wanting to ask:

* When were you in the best place financially? When you were married, in a relationship, or single?

* How did changing from one state to another (single to taken or taken to single) impact your finances?

* Has your marital (or non-marital) status influenced the way you handle money? (For instance, does a single without a family feel less pressure to take on a high-stress promotion?)

* If you are single, how does the hope for marriage and a family impact your financial planning? (Do you save for a future ring, wedding, or family?)

I can say that for myself, I am in a much better place as a single, only because when I was in relationships, I was very young (starting at about age 17) and for some reason, always chose guys who loved to spend money and never thought about how they'd pay for real life. Of course, back then, we were also at the beginning of living as independent adults and learning how to handle money.

My first boyfriend was a wonderful person but when he got his first place, all his bills wound up being due around the same week. If it was any other week of the month, for some reason, he saw himself as having no bills and would spend all his money on whatever he wanted. When "bill week" did come around, he tried to cover everything with only one check (which, of course, was impossible) and was always falling short.

I was living in various places (with family, then in a dorm) going to school and working a lot, and because we were talking about getting married, I was always trying to help him cover his bills. I felt I had to.

This has been a hallmark throughout my relationships.

I don't need someone who has money. I just need someone who knows how to handle it responsibly. I know everyone's situation is different, but for myself, I know I'm much more at peace financially because I am only trying to cover one set of bills instead of two (another relationship that involved children meant paying for an entire family as well.) I am also someone who, in general, likes to work and would probably feel a bit useless without a job (BUT THIS IS JUST ME--I am certainly NOT speaking for anyone else.)

Everyone is built differently. And, I grew up in a family of stay-at-home mothers, which I know is a 24/7 job in itself.

This is also an interesting topic when we talk about God's roles of Leadership within Marriage.

* Should a man expect when he goes from being single to being married that he will pay for most everything?

* Should a woman be expected to cover at least 50% of the bills?

* Does a "traditional" marriage mean the man works and the wife stays at home?


Of course, I'm not expecting everyone to answer all of these questions (though you are welcome to!) But I would love to hear any thoughts that came to your mind as you read them.

I don't believe the man should pay for everything because not all men work. So if the men are supposed to pay for everything, how exactly are unemployed men supposed to do that? Marriage is a 50/50 street, 50/50 on everything. A lot of marriages have both spouses working. Not just the husband. So both pay everything together. It shouldn't rest soley on the guy.

 

[MissCris]

I can't answer for how my finances were when I was single because I haven't ever really been both single and not being supported by my parents (oh the perks of getting married...twice...as a teenager...? Ahem...anyway). But I just wanted to jump in here because people are mentioning how a married couple without children would have more money than a couple With kids.

Not always true. My husband makes a little less now than he did 6-8 years ago, yet we have more money now than we ever did then. Because apparently having kids triggers this weird thing...I think it's called responsibility...in many people who previously had no real sense of it. So, before kids, we couldn't pay our bills, we had a grocery budget of 50 bucks a week, and we didn't have anything like a savings account. Every paycheck was gone within hours of cashing it (this included mine from whatever minimum wage job I had at any given time).

So for us, kids (and God) gave us a dose of desperately needed reality and solid priorities. It took a while to get things straightened out (and I had to humbly admit to my husband that I simply could not manage the money as efficiently as he does), but we no longer live paycheck to paycheck, our bills are all paid on time or early, we have a few nicer things (our van...best vehicle we've ever spent money on and the timing of finding it, plus even finding something this good in our area for a good price...God really blessed us. A safe, reliable vehicle that comfortably fits our family and all the other stuff we load in there is a major, major deal where we live). Anyway! So, I guess my point is, marital status, with or without kids, is not the deciding factor in whether someone has more or less money. I think others have said already that it's all about how the money is managed, and I have to agree.

 

[garet82]

Its depend in how is the way you manage yourself. When you said enough to yourself n greatful with what you have you will be able to survive.
Use the money wisely doesn't mean you hv tobe stingy to yourself or others n wasting lots for useless things.
You must be able to arrenge the prority from up to buttom.
By doing this become singel or not you still able to pay all the life's bills that are waiting.
Cheers

 

[jeremyPJ]

I think a single person has the freedom to put their money to use where they want to. And some married folks get jealous of this. I saw this happen between my first and second marriage, when I had troublemakers for friends. I was not wise in whom I chose as friends, and paid for it. They walked away laughing, and I was bumming.

But with wisdom comes more desire to do what you want to do, and not care what anyone else thinks. If it pleases you and goes in accordance with what the Lord would admire in your work and passion, then go for it!