Is singleness a gift?

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M

MollyConnor

Guest
#2
More like a curse! lol
 

claysmithr

Senior Member
May 23, 2017
370
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#4
I mean, I guess I now have a lot of ME time and a lot of GOD time... if I had a spouse I would have to sacrifice for them. Right now, I'm just sacrificing more for God. So, is it a gift? Maybe not now, but I might get a bigger heavenly reward from the results of it. :)
 
J

joefizz

Guest
#5
Hahahahahaha,depends on what you mean by "gift" if you are asking if it's a God given gift like the holy spirit,no,if you are asking if it's a gift to repel others,or stay alone,I'd still say no because I wouldn't think anyone would intentionally want to repel people,I don't have a girlfriend still(though may have found one possibly on here though can't be sure)I don't consider it a gift to be single.
 

Stranger36147

Senior Member
Jun 13, 2015
707
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#6
Being single is not as bad as some make it out to be. You get the freedom to do whatever you want whenever you want. Less drama you'll have to face and worry about (because let's face it, even couples who stay together and are happy together have their moments, I'm sure.)

Don't let people get you into thinking you have to have someone or that you're a loser or a sad person if you're single. Neither of those things are true.
 

claysmithr

Senior Member
May 23, 2017
370
80
28
#8
Being single is not as bad as some make it out to be. You get the freedom to do whatever you want whenever you want. Less drama you'll have to face and worry about (because let's face it, even couples who stay together and are happy together have their moments, I'm sure.)

Don't let people get you into thinking you have to have someone or that you're a loser or a sad person if you're single. Neither of those things are true.
Hi Stranger, thanks for replying. Yes, I enjoy the freedom that comes with singleness. I enjoy not having to worry about how to please the "other" OR ELSE. :)

I also like the fact that I can focus as much on God as I am able to, being single.

That said, there are some painful single moments. Like when you get sick, or need a ride from a hospital to home.

I'm pretty sure at this point I am a single for life. There is also more money available, even though I give a lot away these days :)

Overall, I think it could be considered a weird gift: Nobody wants it, but it has a lot of positive side effects in ones lives, especially if they use that time to devote to God! :)
 

PJW

Banned
Oct 6, 2017
859
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#10
Hi Stranger, thanks for replying. Yes, I enjoy the freedom that comes with singleness. I enjoy not having to worry about how to please the "other" OR ELSE. :)

I also like the fact that I can focus as much on God as I am able to, being single.

That said, there are some painful single moments. Like when you get sick, or need a ride from a hospital to home.

I'm pretty sure at this point I am a single for life. There is also more money available, even though I give a lot away these days :)

Overall, I think it could be considered a weird gift: Nobody wants it, but it has a lot of positive side effects in ones lives, especially if they use that time to devote to God! :)
Looks like you answered your own question.
 
M

MollyConnor

Guest
#11
For women, it's stressful especially if they want to have children. Once you hit 35, your child is more likely to be born sick. It is a high risk pregnancy. So when you're almost 30 and you're still single, then yeah...it can be kinda stressful and depressing. Men have a little more leeway with this. When men over 45 have children, the baby is at a higher risk for certain disorders. That's a 10 year difference!

I don't want to be an older woman without a family. That's hard. My aunt is one and she's very resentful.

I mean this in a mature and respectful way...but sometimes people want to have sex. You can't do that Biblically unless you are married.
 
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Lynx

Senior Member
Aug 13, 2014
13,135
831
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#13
Is singleness a gift? As with most relationship-related questions, the answer is "it depends."

For some people remaining single is indeed a gift, as Paul explained. They have been called to do great things for God and being single is part of it because frankly a spouse would get in the way.

For some people getting married is a gift... for the same reason! They have been called to do great things for God and a spouse is there to help them as THEY do great things for God.

For some people being single is a season. They are single for a time, and they will get married sometime in the future, but the season might be 40 or 50 years or so.

Then there are people like me, who don't really get all hung up on this "I have GOT to find a spouse or my life isn't a real, validated life!" business, so we haven't spent a lot of time and effort looking for a spouse. We're not really doing anything great for God, at least we don't think so. We just live our lives and do our part at church, at our jobs, wherever something needs to be done, and maybe we might get married someday or maybe not. Either way, we're enjoying life. :cool:
 

kinda

Senior Member
Jun 26, 2013
167
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#14
Have you seen marriages that look like nuclear war? It's a gift your not in World War 3!



I personally think, singleness can be either a gift or a curse, it depends on your perspective. Both being married and being single have benefits and liabilities. Pick your poison, just be glad in whatever God gives or doesn't give you, that is the key. Even if you do get married, divorce, or death happens at 100% historically speaking. Seek God and see where HE leads. This current life and world are temporary, think long term!

Peace!
 
Y

Yahweh_is_gracious

Guest
#15
For me it's less a gift than it is the only acceptable way of being. I am the guy who disproves the hypothesis "there's somebody for everyone".
 
Jun 24, 2017
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#16
For women, it's stressful especially if they want to have children. Once you hit 35, your child is more likely to be born sick. It is a high risk pregnancy. So when you're almost 30 and you're still single, then yeah...it can be kinda stressful and depressing. Men have a little more leeway with this. When men over 45 have children, the baby is at a higher risk for certain disorders. That's a 10 year difference!
From the way I've read the statistics on this, the biggest risk to pregnancy after 35 is miscarriage. It goes up about %10 over normal. Interestingly enough, miscarriage and obesity are also correlated and we (both genders) tend to pack on weight as we age. Whether the statistics on pregnancy after 35 are controlled for obesity or not I'd be interested to know. The fertility rate does drop rather sharply from someone in their 20's, however, it's still over 50% with something like an 80% success rate within a year. As far as a sick baby is concerned, the biggest risk statistically is Down's Syndrome, and the chances go from 1 in 1250 to 1 in 100. That seems like a whole lot, but really you're going from .0008 percent to 1 percent. That means statistically you could have 99 babies without having one with Down's. Still a fairly low rate in my opinion and that's the greatest risk. Of all the data I've looked at, to me, obesity is just as great a risk to both mother and child as age is even for women who are still under 35. That, again to me, gives some room for hope because while none of us can change age we can work on what we eat. I'm sure some of the statistically savvy people here might have something to say about my maths, but that's how I look at it.
 

garet82

Senior Member
Jan 20, 2011
675
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#18
I think what we hv now is gifts from our Lord Jesus.
Life is a gift. Being single or not are also gift that He gives us to choose.
Thats why we must be greatful for what we hv n respect it.
Enjoy your single status or your marry or having someone specials by doing it you can find your own happiness :)

Blessing amen
 

toinena

Senior Member
Mar 10, 2017
2,369
699
113
#19
I guess if I try really, really hard I can see it as a gift. At least I see it as a season. Season to draw closer to God and figure out who I am in Christ. But for life? I accept it might be so, but frankly that sounds like a punishment for me. And as it feels like a punishment it can only be by God's grace that I get freed from that. If someone can love me? Some of my students do. And I them. But romantically? It has backfired badly so far. On the positive note.... I am learning and each guy that dumps me is making me wiser regarding to whom I should avoid. Gift? Nah! Lesson? A hard one!
 

mar09

Senior Member
Sep 17, 2014
3,772
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#20
Hi clay,

Long ago, i heard it is, but it is only recently that ive been reading/trying to understand more abt it being a spiritual gift. I hope i am able to come back to your thread to learn and share bits of what God is teaching.