It's good to be single.

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seekingthemindofChrist

Casting down imaginations
Jul 10, 2023
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Dear seeking:

I have gone through this thread and pulled out all the times I have had a ball here.

THIS is how to play it in a thread like this - play it for comedy. :D
I certainly do not want to possibly cause you any offense, but some of us who have loved deeply have also been hurt deeply. I obviously cannot speak on the behalf of anybody else, but, for me, this simply is not a joking matter. Like I said, no offense meant towards you whatsoever.

Have a blessed night.
 

SomeDisciple

Well-known member
Jul 4, 2021
1,835
823
113
I met one 59 years ago. We're still married, plus 4 kids, plus 9 grand kids, and 3 great grand kids. life has been good.
That's some pretty good marriage stats- especially if you're both happy and not "stuck" there. 59 years is basically a lifetime.
 

SomeDisciple

Well-known member
Jul 4, 2021
1,835
823
113
So, for you guys that want to be married- or at least think you do, or "feel" you do- .... Please share with the rest of us...

What is it that you really hope to achieve by getting married?
 

Tinkerbell725

Senior Member
Jul 19, 2014
4,216
1,179
113
Philippines Age 40
So, for you guys that want to be married- or at least think you do, or "feel" you do- .... Please share with the rest of us...

What is it that you really hope to achieve by getting married?
Achieve
Have your own family
Live happily ever after
Have a shock absorber/someone to talk to
Have someone to share with both joy and pain
Someone said Growth. Is it because single people don’t grow up ever?

Avoid
Monster-in-law
Cheating/broken trust
Drama/fights/stress
Financial issues that come with marriage
More marital issues

I think there are more things to avoid than to achieve. Although some people say it is worth it.
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
41,320
16,305
113
69
Tennessee
Achieve
Have your own family
Live happily ever after
Have a shock absorber/someone to talk to
Have someone to share with both joy and pain
Someone said Growth. Is it because single people don’t grow up ever?

Avoid
Monster-in-law
Cheating/broken trust
Drama/fights/stress
Financial issues that come with marriage
More marital issues

I think there are more things to avoid than to achieve. Although some people say it is worth it.
Based on my own experience and observation I would say tha marriage is well worth the cost of admission.
 

Gojira

Well-known member
Jul 20, 2021
5,741
2,310
113
Mesa, AZ
I am legit not looking right now, and I'm not into girls that wear tight pants; so it's not like it would have been a loss. But there was a time when seeing a woman like her would make me think that I was missing out on something in life... and... I am!

I'm missing out on DIVORCE
I'm missing out on PAYING CHILD SUPPORT AND NOT SEEING MY KIDS
I'm missing out on aaaaall that drama!

poor me.
As we know, all marriages end up this way, so I see your point.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
24,927
8,176
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As we know, all marriages end up this way, so I see your point.
Sarcasm aside, the raw data indicates the odds are HEAVILY in favor of the results he listed.

All the gossip that flies back and forth on my job also indicates such odds.

So yeah, I'm with SomeDisciple on this one.
 

seekingthemindofChrist

Casting down imaginations
Jul 10, 2023
1,178
569
113
So, for you guys that want to be married- or at least think you do, or "feel" you do- .... Please share with the rest of us...

What is it that you really hope to achieve by getting married?
Let me begin by saying that I fully believe that I will remain single for the rest of my life. Primarily because all evidence points that way or because that most certainly seems to be the course or path that God has been leading me down for years. By his grace, I have accepted that, and I normally am okay with it, although I do momentarily falter at times. I stopped counting some time ago, but it has probably been a good 5 years since I have even been on a date.

With that out of the way, even though it may sound rehearsed, all that I ever really wanted was someone I could love and watch over. Not in any sort of controlling way, but just in a caring way, as in helping them to navigate their way through this crazy life with eternal life in the kingdom to come as the ultimate goal.

Even though I am officially out of the race for love, I have seen, in my short time here, some women that I hope some godly men find, if they want to be found.

That is all that I have to say.
 

kinda

Senior Member
Jun 26, 2013
3,679
1,435
113
The singles movement is getting more popular and a little to radical to be honest. I'm more on the side of living a positive life, rather than, pointing blame.

Everyone pays full price, it's singles night! :)
 

Aerials1978

Well-known member
Dec 10, 2019
1,707
986
113
So, for you guys that want to be married- or at least think you do, or "feel" you do- .... Please share with the rest of us...

What is it that you really hope to achieve by getting married?
Even after 2 divorces, I still want to marry again. Companionship is installed into me. That’s the biggie. Also the physical intimacy. No shame in admitting it as that’s how God commands it to be.

I want to a wife that I can share my spirituality with and who puts God first and foremost(The first two did lack that). I don’t always do well on my own, and if God decrees that I should be in martial bond with another woman, then that’s His decree. If not, that’s also His decree.
 

Gojira

Well-known member
Jul 20, 2021
5,741
2,310
113
Mesa, AZ
Let me begin by saying that I fully believe that I will remain single for the rest of my life. Primarily because all evidence points that way or because that most certainly seems to be the course or path that God has been leading me down for years. By his grace, I have accepted that, and I normally am okay with it, although I do momentarily falter at times. I stopped counting some time ago, but it has probably been a good 5 years since I have even been on a date.

With that out of the way, even though it may sound rehearsed, all that I ever really wanted was someone I could love and watch over. Not in any sort of controlling way, but just in a caring way, as in helping them to navigate their way through this crazy life with eternal life in the kingdom to come as the ultimate goal.

Even though I am officially out of the race for love, I have seen, in my short time here, some women that I hope some godly men find, if they want to be found.

That is all that I have to say.
What a perfectly reasonable statement on the matter.

BTW... I gotcha beat in the datelessness dept. My last bonafide date with a Christian woman was 6+ years prior to yours :D

Not that this is some sort of contest. "What's that? You walked uphill to school in the snow in both directions? At least you had shoes! I had to do that in my bare feet!"

"You had feet?"

It's not tit for tat, just had to chuckle a bit when I saw that.
 

seekingthemindofChrist

Casting down imaginations
Jul 10, 2023
1,178
569
113
What a perfectly reasonable statement on the matter.

BTW... I gotcha beat in the datelessness dept. My last bonafide date with a Christian woman was 6+ years prior to yours :D

Not that this is some sort of contest. "What's that? You walked uphill to school in the snow in both directions? At least you had shoes! I had to do that in my bare feet!"

"You had feet?"

It's not tit for tat, just had to chuckle a bit when I saw that.
If it was a contest, then I might have you beat in overall events. In other words, in addition to being alone where a woman is concerned, I think that I have only had one real friend in my entire life, and that friendship ended years ago. It seems to me, and I believe that I am of a sound mind, that God has deliberately separated me unto himself for my own good and for the potential good of others. In regard to me, I thankfully have had the sense to use my alone time in seeking God, studying his word, and purifying myself before him. In regard to others, I have been effective at times, by God's grace, in influencing others positively where the gospel is concerned.

Like I said earlier, normally, I am okay with all of that, but I would be lying if I were to say that I have never thought that it would be nice to have a female companion by my side. It is what it is, so I just accept it, and try to keep moving forward. There is no sense in crying over spilled milk.
 

Ruby123

Well-known member
Mar 1, 2019
11,912
8,233
113
Let me begin by saying that I fully believe that I will remain single for the rest of my life. Primarily because all evidence points that way or because that most certainly seems to be the course or path that God has been leading me down for years. By his grace, I have accepted that, and I normally am okay with it, although I do momentarily falter at times. I stopped counting some time ago, but it has probably been a good 5 years since I have even been on a date.

With that out of the way, even though it may sound rehearsed, all that I ever really wanted was someone I could love and watch over. Not in any sort of controlling way, but just in a caring way, as in helping them to navigate their way through this crazy life with eternal life in the kingdom to come as the ultimate goal.

Even though I am officially out of the race for love, I have seen, in my short time here, some women that I hope some godly men find, if they want to be found.

That is all that I have to say.
Never lose hope if that is your desire.
A retired nun who used to live down the road from me left the nunnery (I dont know what it is called where they live) and moved into the world for the first time in her late sixties early seventies. She just so happened to move in next door to a widow who was of similar age. The two ended up marrying, her first his second. They were married for a few good years. I cant remember exactly how long but they were very happy until he passed. I think it was about ten or so years.
 

seekingthemindofChrist

Casting down imaginations
Jul 10, 2023
1,178
569
113
A question popped into my head earlier, and I think that this might be the right thread to ask it on.

We know that Peter and James had wives, and we also know that they had very productive ministries.

At the same time, we also know that Paul was single, and he also had a very productive mininstry.

What then is the real difference as far as either being married or unmarried is concerned?

I mean, I wish that the Bible told us more about Peter's and James' wives. We have the account of Jesus healing Peter's mother-in-law, but, off the top of my head, I do not recall any real mention of them elsewhere in scripture other than Paul's passing mention of them in 1 Corinthians. What were their wives doing while they were out ministering? I would kind of like to know.

At the moment, and I have not fully thought this out yet, the differences between the married apostles and the unmarried Paul seem to be that Peter and John seem to have ministered more locally in that they are normally found in Jerusalem whereas Paul did a lot of traveling. Paul did say, in relation to the other apostles, that he labored more abundantly than they all did, so maybe he had less restrictions or family responsibilities than the married apostles did. I do not know.

Any thoughts anybody?
 

seekingthemindofChrist

Casting down imaginations
Jul 10, 2023
1,178
569
113
Never lose hope if that is your desire.
A retired nun who used to live down the road from me left the nunnery (I dont know what it is called where they live) and moved into the world for the first time in her late sixties early seventies. She just so happened to move in next door to a widow who was of similar age. The two ended up marrying, her first his second. They were married for a few good years. I cant remember exactly how long but they were very happy until he passed. I think it was about ten or so years.
It is not so much that I have lost hope. Instead, I have adjusted my mentality. For example, seeing how a marital relationship was designed to reflect the relationship between the Bridegroom, Christ, and the bride, the church, I try to compare my longing for a bride to Christ's longing for a bride. In his case, she is found, or won, or however one might say it, through receiving the gospel message. Since this is so, even if I am without a bride myself, I try to focus on helping Christ attain his bride, if that makes any sense. Anyway, I just try to take things one day at a time. If I look too far down the road, then I get messed up in my mind.

Btw, the nunnery sounds too much like the gunnery for me. Lol.